I want my wife back....

caroleshubby

Since my wife had her right breast removed (spindle cell cancer) I wanted to know how long until she goes back to a "normal" routine. Before anyone dumps on me for being insensitive, I'm not that guy. I don't know if her pain is such that she needs to be medicated to the point where she sleeps for hours at a time. Or if her doctors don't know what the hell is going on (it's been two months now) and just keep changing her perscription instead of looking at what's causing her pain. It got so bad (pain) that I took her to an emergency room on Christmas to get someone to look at her because she was complaining of pain. Her surgeon keeps telling us most of her other patients are starting to feel better after two weeks. Please if anyone has something to share get back with me.......Caroleshubby

Poppy

What kind of pain is she having? I wonder if she has nerve damage that could be causing the extreme pain. My husband has been dealing with chronic and unexplained pain for about 2 years. He's had to really push for specialists to see AND listen to him. At one point the surgeon told him it was PTSD from my cancer ordeal. Many doctors would rather medicate and hopefully find a medicine that controls the pain than to keep searching for the root of the problem. I'm not saying that her pain isn't real, but if you are sure that it is real, then keep going to specialists. Google your heart out. Find out what (surgically) could have caused this. The surgeon isn't going to want to tell you the answer b/c if he did something wrong that could mean a lawsuit.

Best of luck to you both. Please keep being loving and supportive. I don't know how old your wife is, but I was 35 when I had to have a dbl. mast. Imagine being castrated. It's that traumatic. Even with reconstruction, you don't feel the same ever again. Whatever you do, don't tell her to get back to her "normal" routine b/c her "normal" has changed. She will hopefully get into the groove of her "new normal" soon. If she doesn't, you might want to have her come here for support.

vivre

Hang in there. It takes a long time to feel normal again. Just try to be as understanding as you can, and encourage her to read threads here, where she will see herself in many of the other women who post. Also, you might want to get her to a chiropractor who might be able to help her with pain, without drugs that could be causing depression. I found one who helped me with pain, after the other docs just could not figure it out. Since muscles and nerves are cut, they can get spastic and a good chiro can do massage and other pain relief. The physical therapist massaged the area under my arm where the nodes were removed and got rid of all the soreness.

Good luck!

roseg

Is she on anti-depressants? It is possible to get into a rut. Absent some nerve-thing two months does seem like a long time to be having extreme mastectomy pain. How old is she? A certain level of activity can be helpful in recovering from surgery, which does leave a person pretty sore.

 Has she had radiation or chemothearpy?  Other health issues?

A node biopsy can be quite uncomfortable. But it does seem like some out-of-the-box solutions need to be considered here. Perhaps a pain doctor?

whippetmom

Just some comments re: spindle cell carcinoma of the breast:

"  1. Spindle cell carcinoma is a rare breast tumor.  2.  Estrogen receptor expression and lymph node metastasis tend to be low. 3.  Relatively favorable prognosis is expected in spindle cell carcinoma of the breast compared to common breast carcinoma."

This is shared in the hope that your wife will be encouraged that her type of cancer has a more favorable prognosis than the greater portion of women on these forums might have, with our "common breast carcinoma diagnoses.  Most of us had sufficient pain after our mastectomies to take narcotics.  For some it is less - for some - longer. Also as roseg mentioned, antidepressants might be helpful in managing the pain, as well as some of the emotional aspects of losing a breast.  We hope you find some help for your wife.  It is a very difficult surgery for some and none of us can gauge how long someone might be in pain after a mastectomy.  Please consider talking with her doctor about your concerns - especially about the amount of medication she is taking which would cause her to go to "sleep for hours."  You might need to be her health care advocate and push the doctors to evaluate some other underlying problem as a result of the surgery.  We wish you the best.

barbe1958

I recommend you get her on Lyrica. It is for peripheral neuropathy and usual used for diabetics who have had amputation. I have fibromyalgia and it works wonders! Your wife my find she has fibro but didn't know until her body was assaulted by the surgery. Also, depression hurts physically, but telling her that she is only depressed may cause her more distress. Amitriptyline (sp?) and Lyrica are your best bets in my opinion as long as the doctors have checked her for obvious physical options.