Long term decisions

KPolasek

Besides the state of the economy ....

Does anyone else have difficulty dealing with making decisions .... especially those that might involve a long term financial commitment?  I need a new car .... but am reluctant to even look much less purchase one .... but my job require traveling and I don't want to be stranded.

Sometimes, I even hesistate to purchase clothes wondering how long I will be able to wear them.

I don't feel sad .... I am facing an MRI tomorrow to see if I have a recurrence in my breast (they have seen a mass -= could be scar tissue and there is a seroma).  Of course, I am anticipating the answer to this test.

I have felt this way though since the beginning .... anyone else feeling this silliness?

Blessings,

Kay

lemonld

Kay,

I did a first and had decided that I didn't want to make any purchases that my family wold be faced with financially if I were not to survive this cancer.  But then I prayed about it and decided that I could not live my life in fear and talked to my husband and on Dec 31, 2007 purchased a new 2007 Ford Edge and I love the care.  It has given me a great sense of pride and a feeling that I could be around for that 5-year's.  Even though I was diagnosed with a local recurrence to my mast site and am undergoing treatment and do not for one minute regret my purchase.  With the bad that we are going through sometimes it's best to treat ourselves if we can afford it.  Jest imagine if you didn't have cancer would you hesitate to purchase a new vehicle, but also keep in mind who knows what the future could hold in this economy.  We all have to take chances sometimes, bite the bullet, and go for it...even though scary..healthy or not.  I hope this make sense, but I do not regret my decision at all.

Sending hugs, Linda

nosurrender

Kay I used to be that way.

In fact, I was living in a partially furnished cottage when I was first diagnosed with Triple Neg and had the rest of my furniture in storage.

I thought I would never move out of that cottage and I sold all the furniture that was in storage.

Well, the cottage was sold and I wound up having to furnish a new place from scratch. It has been seven years and I make plans for my old age. 

Make your plans, dream your dreams, buy that car -  whatever you would normally do. People do survive this! In fact, I think I need a new sofa!

Bug hugs

g

KPolasek

Thanks for the encouragement!  I told my husband yesterday on our way home from the MRI (in a town that is a little over an hour from home) ..... IF this test shows that it is scar tissue and not a malignancy (11/6) -- I told my husband that I want to start looking at cars.  He didn't say no )

It is just so hard to shake this nasty feeling ... maybe if my boob would start feeling better I wouldn't be reminded every second of the day that I have a breast that has been treated for cancer ... I could move on some .... at least a little farther. My lumptectomy was 11/1/07 ... almost one year ... I finished rads on 5/9/08 .... and am hopeful that the radiation has stopped "cooking" my poor boob.

Blessings,

Kay

guitarGrl

For me I keep thinking why keep working? If I retire, I won't have as much money, but my money won't have to last that long anyway ...

Coming up on my first post-treatment mammogram, and I guess I'm really scared. If I had to get BC, why did it have to be 3x negative on top of all of it... it is hard to want to go forward.

susan 

KPolasek

I hear you Susan,

I have had my post-treatment mammogram.  Actually, I had an ultrasound first, then a mammogram .... they saw something there .... last week I had an MRI ..... and today another mammogram on the area of concern .... the regular mammogram would NOT take the picture so the tech took me over to where they do digital mammograms .... which when your breasts are dense is what you want done anyway.  To my relief, the chief of radiation viewed my pics and was able to determine that the calcifications that were showing are just necrosis (dead cells).  I have to tell you that I am so relieved --- I cannot express it in words .... other than PRAISE GOD!!!

Susan, I will pray for you .... I know this valley is deep, dark and scary.  Your tumor was small and no node involvement is a plus.  Also, my reading has resulted in finding out that triple negs have a better response rate to chemo. 

Take care....

Kay