My Niece's

Chris51jon

I need some advice. My sister is in the final stage of losing a three year fight with her BC.

She  just turned 55 and has two girls age 17 and 21. She spoiled them both and they have never had to be responsible. Her husband pretty much had to go along with her as she is strong willed.

Now my younger niece has her first boy friend and that is all that matters and my older niece has been to Europe twice this summer visiting a boy friend she met last year in Australia while visit another one of my niece's who lives there.

The English man has been twice to visit at my sisters and now has returned with a 6 month work visa and is staying at my sisters.

They are not wealthy nor do they have a large home, quite the opposite.My sister had to drive and pick them up from the airport, she runs all their errands and in general is the maid.

I live in the US and my family lives in Canada. I just got back from visiting and I am beside myself.

My sister has not excepted her BC and has told the Doctors to just treat her and she wants to know nothing.She will not discuss it with anyone and only gives me crumbs.

She was just taken off her chemo until her WC and other SE settle down.

I want to call my older niece and set her straight. My Mother asks me not to, she says my sister would be very upset.

What do I do? I love my sister and this whole situation is killing me.

I am a Born Again Christian and my sisters family have never practiced a faith although we were raised Catholic and my sister has faith.

My heart and prayers go out to all you courage's ladies.

Blessings and peace.

BMac

I really feel for you.  It's obvious that you love your sister very much.  I think that you need to respect your sister's wishes as far as her children are concerned.  I do think that she is doing them a great disservice by not letting them know what is going on and therefore allowing them to step up and help.  Where does her husband fit into all of this?  Can you or your mother speak to him or try to get through to her?

Chris51jon

Thank you BMac for your reply.

You helped me make my decision to not interfere. If my sister is happy that is all that really matters. We are all different, thank you Father. I will just continue to pray and love my sister.

Her husband is a great guy and has just always allowed her to do as she wanted. My Mom is 90 and just wants my sister happy. My niece's will have a life time to miss their Mom and to remember their behavior as they mature. Perhaps they will raise their children differently.

I am sure I will be back here as I am still so sad.

Blessings