loosing friends....?

MLMM

Hello everyone,

I am a caregiver for my mom who has BC mets to bone and liver. I am wondering if there are any caretakers out there who have found a hard time keeping friends during the caregiving process. Some of the people I thought were closest to me seem to be checking out when I really need them most. I have a hard time expressing the extend to which I need friends right now. But it is also hard for me to understand why many people seem somewhat absent. I am planning on talking to people about this ASAP. But I was wondering if this situation is common.

I wonder if the overwhelming nature of caregiving has  taken its tole on even what appeared to be some of the more stable, foundational parts of my life.

Any thoughts are welcome.

Love to all.  

spar2

If people know you are caregiving and maybe stayng at your mom's place they probably feel you don't have time for them but I would call all my friends and tell them you love em and need them right now, ask them to come over, call in for pizza delivery, add a little fun in your life.  Rent a movie, something funny even your mom might enjoy that.  Bless you and hugs to you and please let me know how you do and how your mom is and if your friends come back.

NCdaughter

Dear MLMM,

 I have experienced some similar withdrawing.  Some of it, I have to admit, comes from myself because I am sometimes too tired or emotionally exhausted to be with friends.  Sometimes I dread answering questions about my mom's ongoing treatment, etc., but sometimes I desparately want someone to ask.  I have found that most of my friends will assume that I am too busy or overwhelmed and back off a little.  This may be the case with your friends.  If so, take the initiative to plan an activity that fits your schedule and this will let them know that you want and need to be included in the social circle.

 Best of luck!