Hair Hair Hair - Another question

Allydp

MsPharoah and AnotherNYCG - thank you both so much! 

Noonrider, I would be honored if you shared it. Thank you!

MinusTwo

Oh all your videos & blogs are wonderful.  I don't think I even have a picture of me bald.  But I do have a picture when it got back to "annie lenox" length.

StarLover - it's too hot in Texas for wigs and I'm all thumbs w/scarves so I lived w/Buffs.  I got mine at Academy and REI.  Still keep one in my purse & one in my car even though I have 3" of hair since I tend to get cold.

http://www.buffwear.com/

redheeledwomen

Ladies,

I just have a quick question. 

Is it professional to go to work bald??  This upcoming Tuesday will be my first day back to work since my surgery in June 2014.  In August I lost my hair (cut it off) 14 days after my first chemo tx.  It took me four days to get use to the new look.  I spent the rest of the summer uncovered.  This week I found myself feeling a bit self conscience about it.  And I think its because I am going back to work.  Since Im going through chemopause, hats, scarves etc are way too hot.  I haven't been to interested in a wig but think maybe I should try and find one.  Not sure.  I look good bald but don't want to make the wrong decision.

Your thoughts are appreciated.  Thanks.

MinusTwo

RedHeeled - I think it depends on your job and what you do.  If you're in Washington state, I'm guessing it would probably be a lot easier than a Wall Street NYC firm.  Also I think it might make a difference if you are in an office all day or have to go out and meet with clients or "the public".  Good luck girl!!

Edited to add - it depends on your comfort level too.  If you can pull it off, I say more power to you.

noonrider

Men go to work bald and they are still considered "professional". 

Do your coworkers know you went through chemo? If so, they won't be surprised. But, they will still be STUNNED. It is one thing to know that "Suzie went through chemo and lost her hair." It is another thing to actually SEE Suzie without her hair. My sister and I talk every single day. While I was going through chemo, and my surgeries, she called me twice a day to keep tabs on me, but she never actually SAW me. (she did see a couple pictures.) The day came when we finally got together and she started crying. She felt horrible and tried to hide it. Later she said, "I knew you lost your hair, but I didn't think about the fact my sister doesnt' have any hair."  I completely understood what she meant. It was a shock for her.

Be proud of your bald head. You've worked hard to get here. You have come through a tremendous battle and this is one of your  battle wounds. It will heal, and your coworkers can celebrate your regrowth with you. 

redheeledwomen

Minustwo and Noonrider- Thank you.  Your words are encouraging.

I think most of the office knows by now why I've been out.  But, Noonrider, you are right.  When they see me it may actually shock some folks cause its one thing to hear a person is going through BC but its another to see the person and the effects of the disease.  I have some thinking to do.  I'll let you know how it goes on Tuesday.

IamNancy

redheeledwomen - if you are comfortable with it -do it..I do think a lot of women look good bald.. I wore a wig to work, I just didn't have the nerve to go topless however, when my hair started coming in and was still very short, I went without the wig.. people did double-takes and some people never realized I had been wearing a wig.... but it was freeing an made life easier for me.

Starlover

Ladies, thank you for all the great ideas and encouragement - and the head jewelry! Never saw that before in my life! What an idea!

Allydp, your video made me cry and smile at the same time...that needs to be shared!

jbokland

I agree, it depends on your work environment.   Professional office? I would dress nicely, chunky jewelry and lipstick!

jbokland

Bosum. I am so sorry for your experience.  That young tech is just that...young!  Don't take her unprofessionalism or inexperience personally.   You are in the middle of this journey, and it ain't always pretty!   

tucker3

BB...I agree with jkbokland...I am sorry for your experience with the technician. That sort of unprofessionalism (putting it kindly) certainly doesn't help one to feel positive. Know that you are beautiful inside and out and that we are all here for you. Hugs, Tucker3.

Bow1965

I am so sorry BB - that is tough! When I was 22 I was covered with scars from an accident and I remember worrying about whether or not my bathing suit was showing my back zipper (I guess obsessing would be a better descriptor) - at 49 that seems really unimportant! I think we are better at expressing empathy after all we have been through, more accepting, less reactive - may be age, may be our circumstance, but it's a better place to be in my opinion (I don't think that young lady belongs in the medical profession).

Not in love with my body these days, but I love myself, I am what I am and I am alive. BB - Illegitimi non carborundum.

MinusTwo

Bow - I had to look up the Latin to remember - but absolutely true!!  Great.

Bosum - what they said!!!

Anonymous

Bosum:  Whenever I go to any new doc or technician, even though they have my chart that undoubtedly says "mastectomy, no reconstruction," I always try to prepare them, specifically because I don't want to see that astonished face.  It's worked well so far.  I've said it many times (as I will today when I go in for a chest CT), and they've always responded kindly with words like "Oh, don't worry about it, we see everything."  But I know that, if it was instead a surprise, they might reacted in a startled way--so I still prepare them every time.  Then they can put on their game face and I don't have to see the alternative.  I specifically recall that the tech for the heart echo for chemo was also my very first person I told.  It was a young man and he was very sweet.  I mean, I'm not afraid of mice either but I'm still startled and scream like a little girl if they run up my arm when I'm trying to push down the trash in the trash can (yep, true story dat). I had a young cousin who was born very early and he had a clef lip and his skill had not closed.  I remember being "prepared" for what I was going to see when I looked at him through the nursery window.  But I was only about 14 years old and I was so startled I had to walk away and try not to let myself cry.  I was ashamed of my reaction, but I couldn't stop it.  His mother would come and feed and rock him at the hospital, and the nurse on duty would try to convince her to sit away from the window so no one could see them.  I remember her saying "I'm no ashamed of this baby."  Of course not, and I'd feel the same, and I'm glad she refused.  But it was still a sight that could still be quite startling to those coming to visit.

All the best to you - I hope you never have to endure that discomfort again.

Lisaj514

bosumblues, thanks for the gray haired comment. My hair is now white/gray, going from medium brown (colored though). I get a lot of positive comments but when I look in the mirror I'm still surprised. It's just that it was short curly bob length brown hair to very short gray curly hair. Often I feel old ladyish. I think it's that it wasn't a choice that seems to bother me the most. When people say they love my hair I think, but ya, it's this way not by choice but due to chemo (I don't say it though but think it). It was out of my control. I can color it again but that would be so hard now to keep as its sooo gray now (more than before). I like that you say its stylish. I still feel young and want to look young. It's about 2-2 1/2" and so curly so looks shorter. It's salt and pepper on top and bavk. Kind of wish it was all white like yours jbokland.

Who here talked about coloring gray hair and enhancing it while keeping it gray. Few pages back, a month ago? Can you repost? I think you are a hairdresser. Here's a pic from my vacation to Sedona last week. My power pose, full of attitude, strength and don't mess with me cancer look. It was amazing scenery. (Btw 5 1/2 mo pfc and 1trim 2wks ago just to the sides and back to give it some shape and style). Looking for a sassy, youngish style but with curly it's hard. Also any blue eyed ladies using/used latisse and did it change your eye color? Derm doc said she'd prescribe but it could change my light blue eyes dark and not reversible (!) don't want that. Mine are short and sparse. Latisse has done wonders for a lot if you. Light eyed girls? Any experiences?

MinusTwo

Lisa - I gave light green/blue eyes and had no color change after 10 months of using Latisse once a day on lashes & brows.  But it is a valid SE.

IamNancy

Lisa - I think you do look stylish - and I know the color isn't your choice but it really looks good on you.. I wouldn't take the chance of eye color change .. your lashes will return and there is always false eyelashes until then..

jbokland

lisa

Your hair is trimmed up and looks quite stylish!  Color aside, it looks very sassy!   If you color, you'll be fighting gray roots every 2 weeks!    

My hair is developing a little wave.  These odd little random curls whip up one in a while, but I keep having them trimmed.  I think I will keep the super short cut, just hoping the bangs grow a bit!   I used to try to cut my hair like Joey Heatherton.  I used to keep thus photo if her for the stylists who were too young to know her;

lago

Lisa I dyed my hair 13 weeks PFC, the day after I went topless. Been coloring ever since. Mine initially came in black and grey. I never had black hair in my life! I looked too old with the gray although I do have pretty hair but it's pretty colored too.

Part of the problem with the hair growing back is it doesn't have it's shine. My shine started to come back at about 1 year PFC. I think that's probably the "old lady" hair you mean. Like you I have kept it short. Did not grow it back. Here's my linky in case you haven't seen it. Dates are at the bottom of each photo.

MomMom

Lago,  My hair is now growing about 1/4" per week, but it's very fine, thin hair, and I can't imagine coloring it at 13 weeks with so little scalp coverage, if that makes sense.  I looked at your link again, but I can't figure out which photo(s) are you at 13 weeks.  I don't think I'm going to like the salt & pepper color, even though it's more pepper than salt.

 

 

HomeMom

I'm seeing a lot more dark hairs springing up which is exciting but I dont see me going without a wig until Jan or Feb at the earliest

lago

MomMom my hair texture was finer too but I have a lot of hair. It will change back but it will take at least a year depending on how fast your hair grows. The picture 4.29.2011 (11th photo from the right) is the one where I had my hair colored.  This was taken about a week after I colored it. It came out too red. Eventually I just went mostly brown because the red wasn't taking well on all that gray.

MomMom

lago,  Thanks for the response. It's difficult for me to judge, but my husband tells me that my hair growth is on par with yours at my now almost 12 weeks PFC. Did you use semi permanent or permanent color?

lago

I had it dyed professionally with permanent color. My stylist/colorist used the same stuff he used on my old hair. My MO said I could dye my hair when ever I wanted. My hair grows pretty quickly but it was a little slower because I was on Herceptin. I have my hair cut every 3 weeks now.

HomeMom

lago - from 3/11 to 3/28 you had hugh hair growth. How many weeks PFC was that?  Did you do anything special? 

MinusTwo

Lago - you nailed it - NO SHINE.  Did your shine start coming back 1 year PFC or 1 year after the final Herceptin?  Thanks.

lago

HomeMom my last chemo was 1.18.2011 so 8-10 weeks. Once I dyed my hair I had it cut every 3 weeks like I do now so that's probably why it doesn't look like it's growing… and my stylist kept cutting my bangs too short.

MinusTwo Noticed the shine starting to come back 1 year PFC which was a few months after Herceptin ended. But I kept my hair short so you see the new hair more than if you keep all the dead fur stuff.

MinusTwo

Thanks Lago.  I finished heavy duty chemos last December but only finally finished Herceptin 2 weeks ago.  It will be interesting to see if I start to have shine in January or have to wait another year.

lexie2002

Do you remember what conditioner you used?  I've tried a ton of different ones and my hair is still so dry and frizzy?

MinusTwo

Bosum - I'd like to know what you used also.  And how long did you have to leave it on?  Thanks in advance.