Going back to work - tomorrow! & other random thoughts

mradf

Going back to work - tomorrow! & other random thoughts

mradf

Well, I am truly moving on, I hope.  Tomorrow I will return to work after 13 weeks and 3 surgeries.  The bilateral mast was 2/14, an expander exchange following infection was 4/9 and an emergency surgery due to a burst blood vessel in my chest was 4/28.   It was my decision to go back and the surgeon had no objections, and I feel ready. 

I have some random thoughts about my experiences.  Feel free to add your own!

13 weeks is a quarter of a year.

The last day I worked, I drove home in an ice storm.  I watched the season change through my front window, from the recliner where I spent weeks recovering.

In my opinion, it was the most pleasant winter and spring weather in years.  I was able to walk almost every day outside.  At first it was slowly up and down the block.  Now I'm walking about 3 miles a day and it feels great.  I plan to continue walking after work even if it cuts into dinner and housework because, clearly, my wonderful husband and children could not care less about either. 

I do not miss my breasts.

Reconstruction is a process.

I have not cried since my diagnosis the first week of November '07.

Laughter really is the best medicine.

I am much stronger in the face of adversity than I gave myself credit for.

I no longer fear anesthesia, and I have great respect for anesthesiologists.  Here is someone you've known for all of a few minutes, and then they take your life in their hands and then you never see them again. 

I have great faith in modern medicine.

I have great faith in God.  A recent comment to me was "this must have made your relationship with God much deeper", and the more I thought about it, the more I realized it was pretty deep already. 

Despite the setbacks and extra surgeries, I still do not feel like a cancer "victim".  Because the surgery successfully removed all the cancer and I do not need treatment, I feel lucky and blessed. 

I love this website and all the women who come here.

Good night and be well,

Maria

faithandfifty

best wishes as you return to your life............

congrats on getting outta that recliner & getting out there

AnneW

I have found recovery to be a very insightful time, too, Maria. I'm glad you have found the strength that is within you. I know we all have it. We have just hidden or suppressed it for whatever reason. And I'm proud that you will go on taking care of yourself. Get those walks in. They are vital for that introspective "me" time. You're right. No one gives a damn about the cleaning. Does anyone on their dying bed say, "Gee, I really wish I'd spent more time cleaning and cooking."??????

Anyway, have a wonderful transition back to the job. They'll be glad to have you back. Just don't forget about us, unless you're ready to. Really, it is all about you!

Anne

mradf

My first week back to work was excellent in that I felt energized and good to be talking about subjects other than my breasts and surgeries - although we managed to get in a few laughs about my "starter boobs".  It felt goood to be productive, and even better to bring home a paycheck.  I managed to take my daily walks, saw the PS for two fills and saw the BS for the first time since late February.  Today was a glorious, clear day and we went to the airshow at Jones Beach, featuring the Navy's "Blue Angels".  There had to be a few hundred thousand people there.  I soaked up the sun and it felt better than anything has felt in a long time.  Maybe this week I can find a swimsuit for this summer to accomodate the ever changing bustline.  I usually wear (wore) a one piece tank with built in bra.  One of my sisters is recommending the one piece with the blouson(?) style top half, with a shelf bra.  I think she's right.  Maybe I will find one this week, with the sales really starting in earnest.  Plus, we opened the pool yesterday.  Yes, it's summer season on Long Island!  These are the "happy places" I went in my thoughts before each surgery, and they have arrived along with my recovery. 

Life is good.

Be well,

Maria