I lost weight Friday. About 3 lbs each!

SLH

I lost weight Friday. About 3 lbs each!

SLH

Well, that was a load off my chest!  Last Friday, I had surgery to remove my saline implants.  With my new ‘thin’ body...I now look like a 12-yr-old again!

For those of you who haven’t heard my story, a brief history: I had a bilateral w/expanders in March 05. The process was fairly uncomplicated, because I had stage 1 ILC, and didn’t have to do radiation or chemo.  I’m not sure if my doctor’s decisions led to some of the problems that I had, but I’ve been struggling to get past the pain for three years.

Three weeks after my bilateral, my PS strongly believed that it was better to fill the expanders quickly, with large amounts of saline.  Unfortunately, it made breathing a problem, pulled my shoulders forward, and made my spine feel like it was out of alignment.  I had my exchange to saline implants Sept 05, a complete hysterectomy Oct 05, and then had emergency surgery April 06 for scar tissue from my hysterectomy blocking my intestines.  Ouch!

Through all my surgeries, the constant pain and muscle tightness from my implants never subsided.  I saw physical therapists, did yoga and had massages, but the muscles down the sides of my neck and upper shoulder areas were straining, causing me to have frequent migraines.  It was especially bad when I tried to do art and gardening projects, which are two passions of my life.

Then, about six months ago my pectoral muscles began contracting around the implants.  I’m not sure if it was the start of capsular contracture, but the muscle spasms made it hard to get to sleep.  I scheduled the surgery, yet I still felt reluctant to ‘deconstruct’.  I told my husband I was afraid he would look at me afterward and find me unattractive.  He wrote me the following message:

“Sally, I believe, as I have said all along, that you are doing exactly the right thing. What I do NOT understand, and can never truly understand completely, is the emotions you are going through in terms of going flat-chested. I am sensitive to the fact that that is the biggest concern of yours and how you will feel afterward. But knowing you, as I hope I do, I truly believe that getting your life back will FAR outweigh any negative emotions. You could be getting back to your college stamina once you’re rid of the neck pains. One thing I am very aware of is that these pains have changed you. Dealing with pain 24/7 is oppressive. You have been fighting through this pain for 3 years now. It’s time you got back to enjoying life again.”

I have been without implants for three days.  My muscles have thanked me!

sally

Binney4

Aw, Sally, I'm so happy for you!!! Rest, enjoy, be WELL!

Binney 

Anonymous

Sally - How sweet it is! Your dh is a doll. I totally understand...during my 1st Mast. (ILC for me too) , I had an expander put in. Because I was so small chested, and the smallest implant would be bigger than my remaining boob, I was going to, down the road, have an implant put in the "good" side to match. I couldn't believe the pain I had from that expander. I couldn't even stand up straight because it was tugging at my chest wall. It was horrible. Two weeks later, after my Sent Node came back positive I had to go in for an Ax Node Dissection. I BEGGED my ps to "pop" in to the operating room and take that frickin' expander out. I still had lots of post-Mast and post-node removal pain, but I was so relieved to have that damn thing outta me. A year later I had a Prophyl Mast. It's hard to have "nothing" up there, but I still don't think I could handle an attempt at it again. I never go in public without prosths. Because I'm small boned and short, tight fitting clothes look better on me, my ribs stick out further than my ex-chest! Not a pretty sight! LOL

Congrats to you! Relief with a capitol R! Just think...before you know it, you'll be a pain-free gardener again! LOL

Erica3681

Sally,

After all the pain you've been through, I'm glad your muscles are thanking you and I hope the relief continues. Don't know if you're thinking you might ever wear breast forms, but if you decide not to go flat all the time, there really are some great and comfortable options.

If you're considering trying forms, don't rush to get them too quickly, though. It takes time for your chest to heal and you need time to enjoy your new breast-free state. 

Barbara 

nagem

Congratulations, Sally. After seeing what my friends have gone through with reconstruction, I don't think I have the endurance. The doctors don't really tell you about the high risk of complications, discomfort and outright failure. But anecdotally, I'm finding it's pretty high. So happy to hear that you're more comfortable.

SusaninSF

Sally,

I hope you are recovering well from your surgery. I found that I healed very quickly once the implant was removed. As Barbara said, if you choose to wear them, there are some really good prostheses out there. The one I wear feels more like my original breast than the implant ever did.

Your dh sounds like a great guy!

Let us know how you are doing and if you have any questions.

Hugs, Susan

OLBinNJ

Sally,

     Congratulations on getting rid of the pain.  I had my implant removed @ a year after the exchange surgery and couldn't be happier.  I had issues with tightness and hardening from the beginning, and was so releived to get that blasted thing out of me.  I used to call it my Chevy truck, you know, "Like a Rock"!  It took a long time to find forms and bras that really worked for me, but don't rush into anything, let yourself heal, and read all the suggestions here and on Barbara's web site.  Good luck in this continuing journey!