*ask a lesbian*

Methusala

Lately my 5 year old son has been referring to my sister's partner as Aunt "XXXX" 

I have no problem with this, I think it's cute and they're forming a bond.

Some day he'll want to know why he has two aunts... etc.

any suggestions on how to handle this?  I just want some opinions outside the family, I'd like to know how others have handled this.

Thanks gals! 

Anonymous

Tell him that they love one another just as Mommy and Daddy do. That should do it.

~Marin

CherrylH

I think children are very accepting of situations and innocent of social dos and don'ts. They have to be taught otherwise, in my opinion. I know this isn't the same, but I'll share a couple of experiences with you.

I am black and my four godchildren are white. One night I was having dinner with them and the oldest, 7,asked whose sister I was, Mommy or Daddy (they call me Auntie Cherryl). I said Mommy and I are nontraditional sisters. She asked what is that. I told her she would better understand when she was 10. She replied, OK and all has been well since then.

The teen age  daughter of a friend was babysitting for a lesbian couple. They child, about two years old had a bad dream and woke crying for her mommy. My friend's daugther said she  was frustrated because she didn't know which mommy to call. It wasn't an "unnatural" situation for her. Some families have a mommy and daddy, some two mommies, some two daddies.

Your son will be fine. He dosn't see anything different with his aunts. Don't make it different. The real world will intrude on his world soon enough. Don't rush it.

Cherryl

Anonymous

My daughter was 4 and she came home from daycare and told me how lucky "Casey" was cuz she had 2 mommies.  I assumed it was a stepmom/mom situation. I went to a birthday party and met one of them. It wasn't until I met the other one at daycare did I figure out the situation.  None of the kids thought it strange ........  LUCKY was the word of the day.

NoH8

I would just explain to your son that some families have 2 moms, some have 2 dads, some have 1 mom and I dad, some have 1 mom, some have 1 dad etc. and that all kinds of relationships can make a family.

You know Methus, he may not ever ask because like Rock's example, he might just "get" the concept as just another type of family. It's often the adults who are are more nervous about the difference than the kids.

Your story and Rock's, warm my heart-- and how you've both handled it is perfect!