The Holidays

Anonymous

The Holidays

Anonymous

Hey Everyone,

Anybody feeling overwhelmed? I feel like I want to handle all the things I used to but I just can not. I am forcing myself to do so many things and I am physically and mentally and emotionally paying for it. Does anyone else feel like they just can not be the mother, wife, sister, daughter, auntie,friend,cousin and on and on that you used to be ? I am sitting here taking a break thinking , I might just take a pain killer and go back to bed today. Is it just me? The tree weighs a ton,taking down all the decorations and putting them up, all the shopping and cooking and baking. The plays and pageants start tomorrow for me. I have already had the first rehearsal for the plays I am in charge of . I am completely overwhelmed. Am I a cry baby?I have not slept over 4 hrs in one night in almost 1 month. I am in constant pain. The migraines are more frequent. I am so exhausted from the diarrhea then constipation and now I am retaining fluid like crazy. Before cancer I was superwoman. I enjoyed this time of year. I worked a full time job, went to every play, pageant you name it. Volunteered at my church for all the events and helped my mom and siblings and loved it all. This year I have no job, and only doing the other stuff and can not keep it together.Is it just me?

Benita

sparker38

Hello Benita,

I sort of understand what you are going through.  I two have the superwoman complex.  I have so many friends and family members so concerned and  caring for me and constantly in prayer.  They won't let me do anything.I know I can do it they just won't let me and callme hard headed when i do.  I am not a baby I am 38 years old.  How ever the other day I did fill like one the day before my first chemo treatment and just had the need to want to cry to my daddy.  He lives 4 hours away but just talking to him and the phone felt like I was his baby girl again lying in his arms while he was telling me everything was going to be all right.  I felt so much better.  I made it through my first treatment with no side affects except for a little diarreah.  I tell you prayers of the righteous availeth much.  I am just holding on and knowing that God's word will not return to me void.  I put alot of ringlets in my hair yesterday dressed up for chemo.  Now I am scared to comb through my hair yet.  Even though I am believing that it's not going to fall out. I am just taking it day by day.  And so should you.  I know it's hard but ask for help.  Take a break, people are understanding more than you know.  Make sure you are taking some me time.  My new theme song is Mary J Blige (just fine).  I get my dance on when that comes on dance in the mirror with no shirt on.  My husband just looks at me and laugh.  But I have to believe it.  I read a daily devotional for healing and a confession scritpture everyday.  Thats what is keeping me.  Some times honey we just have to pass the tourch and take time for ourselves to heal emotionally and physically.  Pray on it and let him lead you to your answers.

Take care

Sabrina 

Anonymous

Good grief!  Wrong thread.

Anonymous

I always feel pressure this time of year, but lately, it seems like the pressure is constant. It makes me angry and resentful, but the one thing cancer has taught me is to speak the heck up! It's easier to say no than it used to be - even to people who aren't used to hearing it from me. I also seem to get that "red flag warning" -like whatever it is I'm contemplating will push me over the edge so I shouldn't take it on - a lot more frequently. Or maybe I'm just more sensitive to it now than I ever was...



I think we need to adopt Nancy Reagan's line and "Just say no" more often...

Lcharmie

HI BENITA,

I AM GOING ON A 9 YEAR SURVIVIOR AND I AM 60 YEARS OLD AND THANKING GOD EVERY DAY!!!  NOW---IT IS FOR YOU---ME, ME, ME, TIME AND IT WILL TAKE SOME TIME TO GET TO THERE--I TOO TOOK CARE OF EVERYONE, MY CAREER WAS A LICENSED MENTAL HEALTH TECHNICIAN, SO EVEN THERE, IT WAS TAKE CARE OF PEOPLE, YES I HAVE LEARNED TO SAY NO, AND KNOW THAT ALL THE THINGS I THOUGHT HAD TO BE DONE, ALL THE TIME, WAS ABOUT, SURE ENOUGH, WHAT I THOUGHT---AS A LOT OF THOSE THINGS HAVE GONE BY THE WAYSIDE NOW AND NO ONE ELSE SEEMS TO CARE AND I LEARNED TO BE NICE TO ME, AS I HAVE BEEN TO OTHERS, THAT MEANS BACKING UP ALOT---TAKE IT MINUTE BY MINUTE, HOUR BY HOUR, ONE DAY AT A TIME, AND PRACTICE MAKES PERFECT.  GIVE YOURSELF TIME TO FEEL WHAT YOU DECIDE TO FEEL--BLOCK OUT THE GUILT, AS IT TRYS TO RUN "SUPERWOMEN",

HANG IN THERE---WE MAY HAVE CANCER, IT DOES NOT HAVE US!!!

SINCERELY

LINDA