continued Tissue expander pain!!

Estepp

Ladies.. a very dear friend of mine is doing the " scans" that we all fear tomorrow. She is finally out of a VERY long 1 1/2 years of treatment... she is tough... but scared for tomorrow. These will be from brain mri to the rest of the body.. every part to see if the cancer is still gone... we all can imagine her fear... some of us have had it already.. some have not yet...

On my blog, I have written something for her... but then, as I re-read it.. I see that it is for us ALL!

Please check it out and leave a little comment for Daina.... she is the type of person who prays for all of us,.. not just herself...

I love you gals...

Her testing starts at 10am tomorrow...

Laura

http://www.estepps.blogspot.com/

Montana_Mom

Jean - thanks for adding me to the growing list.  I am counting the days!    

Jackie - my later fills (60 cc) were not as painful as the first four, and I experienced fewer muscle spasms toward the end.  My fill schedule was 30 at time of BM, 240 about 6 weeks after BM, 120, 90, 90, and then 60 each week until done, mid December.  I did take two over-the counter Motrins before the fills and scheduled a physical therapy appointment the day of or day after each fill and that really helped me.  The PT applied ice to my chest and heat to my upper back and shoulders, realigned the vertebra twisted from the muscle spasms, and then massaged the sore spots.  He also made sure I kept moving my arms and prescribed stretching exercises.  Have you tried PT and/or gentle stretching?  The more I moved during expansion, the better I felt.  I feel your pain and fear.  Sharon  

karen9516

Sue-I had my mastectomy on Nov 19. I have had very little pain and I usually don't know they are there except at night. I am not a back sleeper but I can't sleep on my side it's not comfortable. I am a very small frame and my expanders are full at 400cc and very tight. I showed a friend of mine who just had a baby and she said it looked like I was breast feeding and engorged! I think that is why I am uncomfortable at times but I have been back to work since Jan 2 and am working 40+ hours a week as a critical care nurse and I do a lot of lifting of heavy patients. My PS filled mine to 350cc at the time of surgery and wasn't going to put anymore in but changed her mind and put 50cc in at my last appt. She put in the expanders because I didn't know if I wanted silicone or saline and she also thought she would get better cosmetic results. I am glad she did it this way. I have a friend who had breast cancer and had a mastectomy with immediate implants and had to go back for a revision.

Mykidsmom

Estepp - Prayers are coming for your friend Diana. Please tell us how she does w/ her scan. Does she get her results right away???? I hope so! Take care. - Jean

Karenp62

Has anyone been tanning (bed) since their MX and expander placement??

Mykidsmom

Karen - Not me. But then, I didn't use a tanning bed before my sugery. But I am sure someone will respond. - Jean

Estepp

Thank you Jean!!!! She is half way done with the scans and she should find out this week....

I have not tanned with them yet.. I have rads... so I might not be tanning at all this year... I will be using the spray on I am sure..... this cancer has got me thinking differently...

Linda54

Laura, I am also praying for your friend Diana.   How are you feeling?  Are you ready for tomorrow?

I was laying in a tanning bed when I had my first DX 24 years ago.  Have not been in one since. We filled in our old inground pool 4 years ago and I have not done any sunbathing since.  Just don't care about it.  I head for the mountains instead of the beach......

Estepp

Thank you Linda... I am under the weather ( head cold).. but hanging in there... I AM NOT ready for tomorrow.. but it is in Gods hands and I will be fine.. Thank you for remembering!

How are you doing? I am finally going to try to start the workout you gave me on Wednesday this week... I was going to today but this head cold had me up all night...

Anyway.. I AM going to give it my all to start it again.. I have to get exercising.. I know I would feel better...

Jan1

Hi ladies, I have posted here a few times, but mostly lurking.  I need to know if any of you have had anxiety and lack of energy after the relief of having surgery over with?    I was doing great, but the stress of going back to work has wiped me out, emotionally and physically, I went back 4 weeks after surgery, and I am still having fills, so that is another factor, hopefully I just one more.  Just curious if any one else felt really great after surgery and then had the doldrums?  Jan

Mykidsmom

Jan - I am 8 weeks post-op and haven't returned to work yet, so, sorry, I can't help. Perhaps you are expecting too much! Especially w/ the fills still going on. Take care. - Jean

YvonneB

Hi Jan,

I felt really down int he dumps around the 4th week too.  I decided maybe that I needed something to keep my mind busy so I went back to work on week 5 and I was soooooo tired for the first two weeks that I could hardly make it past 6p.m.  I had my appointment with my GS on week 6 and she wasn't impressed that I went back to work.   She said I should have stayed home for 8 weeks too.  I was having fills once a week too and that really knocked the starch out of me.  I didn't work on the day after my fills but I did hang in there for the rest of the week.  WHY??? Not sure!  In retrospect I should have just ignored the guilt and stayed home.  Take the time you need to recover! 

Cathee

Jan,

I was also extremely tired up until about 10 weeks after surgery.  I couldn't imagine going to work before that.  Also after each fill it wipes me out.  For all the new ladies going thru this...it's time to take care of yourself.  Read those favorite books, catch up with friends for lunch, knit, sew whatever is your thing.  And do it without GUILT.  It is OK.  It's all about you for a little while. Most important check back with this thread often.

fairy49

Hi Jan! I think what you are feeling is totally normal, I remember feeling pretty good a couple of weeks in, but had no energy really.  I went back to work after 8 weeks and it wore me out mentally and physically.  What I realized for me was that I was used to being home, safe, in my environment, and even though I love my job, venturing out again was scary, so I got somewhat depressed and felt very scared, I think because for me that is when I had to make decisons regarding the next steps in treatment, waiting for scan results etc, so I guess reality hit me at that point....... I am doing much much better now, so it does get better!

Lorraine

warrior

My boss just does not understand my situation at all.  I have been feeling really stressed and down lately because people at work just make me feel so guilty.  I don't know if they realize it or not.  Sometimes it's just a matter of body language that I know what they are thinking without saying a word to me.  I have been going through my fills and I go to work the very next day feeling extremely uncomfortable and hurting and I work as long as I can and leave (usually at least 6 hours) because I just need to go home and rest.  After I hear what my boss tells other people just makes me so mad.  Of course "he" (I work with mostly males) doesn't know what I'm going through because he has never had this happen to him but he can at least have some compassion.  Am I asking too much?  I don't think so.  It's already hard on us to go through the journey of a cancer diagnosis but to not have support from various people really hurts.  It is quite depressing.  All I know is I'm doing the best I can...and I'm stronger for it.  Sorry, just really needed to vent. Thanks for listening.

trish1958

Ladies,  I was going to return to work next week, that would be 4 weeks after surgery, but you have me rethinking that decision. One problem is that I look really well, not sick, and am really well, with enough rest.  I think in many of our situations that is true.  We look ok, so co-workers and employers have unrealistic expectations, as do we sometimes.

Trish

Mykidsmom

Trish - I would wait if I were you. I am generally a very activer person, but I find that I am not myself even yet. ANd I am already 8 weeks or more post-op!

Warrior - You have every reason to vent! Your co-workers and boss have NEVER walked in your shoes. THey should try it for a day or so. It is the dx. The surgery. The emotions. The discomfort. It is all those things plus more. And they just do not understand! Hang in there my dear!

Jan1

Wow Warrior!  I hear you, and to the rest of you ladies, you hit the nail on the head!   I went back to work too soon,me being the  "good worker", I was wanting to make sure no one was inconvenienced by my illness, except me..... duh!   I paid a price by going back to work too soon,  Trish, think about going back, once you give up your disability payments, you will have a hard time getting them back.  I have been going in for fills on my lunch break and then back to work they put 100 cc in and the pressure and pain are a lot, but I thought I was being a wimp. I take Advil on the way into the office.  I think I will take the next day off after the next fill and take it easy.  I just need to heed some of my own advice about listening to your own body.  I feel a little better today, thanks for listening to me and reminding me that I don't get up in the morning and put on a cape with a bid "S" on it.  Thank you, your posts have been so insightful!  Jan

Jan1

Yvonne, thank you, I just kept thinking something was really wrong with me that I wasn't feeling like my old self.  I think I am trying to rush the healing process and put it all behind me.  Your observations are so helpful, and Lorraine and my kids mom, thank you for being the cheerleaders and great communicators on a subject that few really understand unless they have been there.   My spirits have been lifted because of you all.  Thanks Jan

Cathee

Ladies

I just got back from my exchange surgery and it went so well.  No pain meds required.  I feel great.  Good luck to alll of you ready for your exchanges!!!

YvonneB

Hang in there warrier!  It is hard finding the compassion you need from your co-workers in my experience.  I think they are just glad that you are back and don't have to cover for you anymore. At least that is what I felt.  I believe that they think that if you are back to work you must be fine.  That couldn't be further from the truth.  It is nice to have something to keep your mind busy, but it is very tiring and stressful trying to work and go for fills every week.  Give yourself time and you will feel better emotionally and physically.

Jan - love your comment about the cape with the "s" on it!  So true! 

Trish - I would really rethink your plans about going back to work.  I too felt pretty good at home and started to feel guilty about being there. Going back to work really takes its toll and Jan is right about it being hard to change your mind after you do go back. 

abinneb

Cathee - great news!!  I'm so happy for you!  Hope you will enjoy the new 'girls'!

Amy

smmr

Cathee - Can't wait to be able to say I'm done with the exhange surgery.  Did your PS move your pockets any?  Closer together or anything?  I feel like my expanders are too wide and I'm always hitting my arms on them!!   I'm sure it's a big sigh of relief to have that over with and with such good results!!

Montana_Mom

Karen:  I did very limited tanning in a bed last month (arms and legs), prior to a trip to Hawaii. Us Norwegians from Montana are awfully white this time of the year, uff da. I always covered my chest and underarms with a towel because I did not want to burn my new skin or expose the scars, plus I didn't plan on going topless!  I suggest you ask your PS before tanning. 

Jan and others re:  doldrums.  Oh my, no one warned me that I would miss my sick breasts so much and and feel so blah.  I thought the answer for me to snap out of the doldrums was to return to work two and one-half weeks after BM.  In hindsight, that was a mistake because I believe it took my 56 year old body longer to heal, as evidenced by increased swelling and output in one drain tube, which needed to stay in for 41 days.  I also struggled mentally and physically with my altered physical appearance in a professional office setting (for goodness sake, I was still using an ace bandage when I returned to work).  As stated by others, as soon as you return to work, you are expected to be productive and more than likely there isn't a magic "undo" button if you discover you returned too soon.  Please learn from my mistake - if possible, stay home longer, read some good books, listen to great music, and be good to yourself. Sharon      

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Jackie300

Warrior,

I too went back to work and it is very difficult to get through the day. I have a very physical job, but I work with all woman. I find that they all ways want to do my work, but I always refuse because I think I may have a day I really need the help. Not all woman respond the same way because my PS is a woman and she thinks my pain isn't common. I find myself down a lot of the days and anxious. My PCP is a woman and she is very compassionate and started me on Lexapro. She also referred me to another doctor about the muscle spasm and pain that I am having. He was also compassionate and was very concerned. He told me that he wouldn't be able to handle any foriegn body under his chest muscle and then have the muscles and skin stretch weekly. He said if I wasn't having pain or discomfort than he would worry there was something wrong with me. He put me on Neurontin and told me to take Flexeril three times a day until the Neurontin kicks in. You have to start off slowly with Neurontin and gradually increase the dose. He also said that he will be there for me that I can call anytime. He said he will try to ge me through this painful time. I never met this doctor before and he is so concerned. I'm thinking he may have had a family member that went through this. Thank GOD for that there are still caring doctors out there. I'm sorry I'm talking about myself again......I think when I start writing that is what happens because I try never to complain to family and friends. Warrior, some days I feel that a truck has just ran over me. Try to keep focus on something that is very important in life to you and that will get you through these tough day. Also, I took two vacation days off for my next fill. I haven't another fill since some saline was removed from the rt side a month ago. This doctor told me to try this medication and schedule a fill and to take that day and the next day off. What a smart and caring man. So if you have vacation or personal days why don't you try that too.   

donna2001

 I have a question I hope someone can help me.  I had bilateral mast. and tissue expanders on 12/26/08.  I am filled to 550 cc as of today.  THEY LOOK AWFUL AND FEEL AWFUL!   Every time I get a fill, my breasts get bigger and bigger under my ARM PIT!!!  I look like a linebacker.  I look horrible in clothes.  It is so obvious that my breasts are under my arm pit.   I have seen pictures on the Internet of beautiful breasts that have tissue expanders before the exchange.  What can I do about this???  Is my PS at fault?  Please help my concern.  I have searched the Internet and can find no information.  Thank you so much.

Mykidsmom

Donna2001 - I can't help you too much except to say that we had surgery around the same date (mine was 12/16) and my TEs are not as full as yours' (320 cc), but I also have one that extends under my arm. It is not obvious under the sweaters and everything else I wear this time a year. Perhaps it will be better after your exchange. Do you have an exchange date yet? We have a thread where we are listing all of our exchange dates, perhaps you would like to be included. It is called Exchange City under Reconstruction. Best wishes.

Jackie - I am so sorry that you are so uncomfortable. I expect it may have to do w/ your use of your muscles. I find that my pectoral really tightens up if I use my arms too much, or if I am tired. And that makes me so much more uncomfortable.

Jeansbeans

Dear Donna2001,  I too had bilat mast with tissue expanders in May 08.  I was expanded to 400cc's at first and also looked like  "  THE HULK" I was so upset, but my PS reassured me it has to be like this until the tissue expands I was in extreme pain and had to have some saline removed just so I could function.  If you go back far enough on this thread you can read my story. I walked with my arms out to my side so they would not rub against my expanders. Yes mine were also under my arm!!  I decided to go REAL SLOW for the rest of my fills, only 30- 50 cc's at a time.  My final fill was 600cc's and I was like that for 3 months, I just had my exchange on Feb. 4th.  I feel so much better and they look great. Don't be discouraged, It is only a temporary thing. You will have to find shirts that fit your expanders, probably you'll have to go a size larger! Good Luck and keep us posted.  It DOES get BETTER!  Gentle Hugs, Jeanie

Jeansbeans

Hi Jan1, I know how you feel.  I went back to work 7 weeks post Bilat mast with tissue expanders! I was still having fills too. For the next 5 months, because I went slowly aftr my 1st fill of 400cc's.  I was so exhausted , I took naps on my lunch hour.  After a week back I started feeling stronger, I think I was just getting lazy at home. I was not depressed during this whole ordeal, Do you feel that way?  Make sure you speak to your Dr. about it if you do .  Good Luck to you , and don't overdo, Gentle Hugs, Jeanie 

Anonymous

Jackie300, 

Good for you for getting the help you need from your PCP.  I'm so glad you found an empathetic doctor to help with your pain.  

Tina