sex

kathymer

after my reconstruction and permanent implant operation my boyfriend of 4 yrs does not want to have sex and the 1 time we tried he could not get an erection.  he is a very nice & good person and even though I knew that breasts were his turn on I expected to be able to work thru this problem.  anybody else have this problem with their partner?

Anonymous

Kathy....Have you tried reading through the 'Mojo' thread (I know, it takes about 12 hours to do so!)? This has been discussed off & on there since so many of us have had difficulties with sexual issues following our various treatments. As I recall, alot of women found that reassuring their partners that touching their reconstructed breasts wouldn't hurt them was helpful. Also, I'd think that your own attitude would have an effect on your sexual relationship...if you treat your breasts as attractive and sexy, maybe that communication will take and he'll see them the same way. Maybe if you tried to 'dress them up' with hot lingerie or whatever (nipple clips anyone?), he'd become more turned on and playful..? Finally and alternatively, you might choose to downplay your breasts, wear a sexy but not so in-your-face cami, and draw more attention to your other sensual body parts. As a last resort, of course, you can resort to lights-off, but I hope that won't be necessary for you, at least not for the long haul.

 I hope these ideas help some, Kathy. Why don't you join us on the 'Mojo' thread? We give lots of support on sexual issues there AND have lots of fun too!

~Marin

roseg

Not to duplicate the "mojo" thread, but I think the idea of sexy lingere might help. You've got the bumps in the right place.

It might not hurt to warm BF up with some naughty videos or something. Usually when you get guys going they're good.