Starting Chemo in May 07

PDXLeeAnne

Happy T-day Eve to my fellow Americans! I'll be heading to my parent's house (3 hours away) tomorrow a.m. with my kids, dog and boyfriend in tow. We'll stay 3 nights... should be fun I hope.

In my family we usually go around the table on Thanksgiving and say what we are thankful for. Depending upon how much wine is consumed prior, I'm feeling like I could have quite a little speech to make.  So much to be thankful for in the wake of what has been quite possibly the best and worst time of my life...

I always take a pretty low key approach to the holidays (life is busy enough as it is!) and I expect to do the same this year. We'll get a tree in a few weeks and put lights on the house. Between son and bf I imagine I won't have to do too much except point. Hopefully I can do a lot of shopping online. My family does only homemade gifts amongst the adults - not sure what I'll do but it will have to be easy.  All of us, IMO, have the right to just do what we can, without feeling ANY guilt if we don't do as much as in previous years. 

Know that I love you all and am thankful for each and every one of you. Your humor, understanding, prayers and support continue to make my journey lighter and more bearable! Thank you!

LeeAnne 

lizzzy

Hey Everyone,

Happy T-day!  We're going to my in-laws tomorrow.  They're Chinese so we'll be having fish and probably chinese broccoli, maybe some soup--but nothing traditional.  I'm trying to accept that it's about the family and not about the turkey and the pumpkin pie!  Over the weekend we'll get together with my family for some sort of casual get together.  Probably breakfast.  My family likes breakfast a lot.

I'm feeling stronger every day.  Amanda, don't feel bad about my end of chemo not registering--it doesn't really feel like the end to me yet and I haven't really felt too much like celebrating because I'm still so tired and achey.  But I am improving which is the important thing.  I went out for sushi Monday night.  Couldn't wait one more day I missed it so much.  It was delicious.  We had all of our faves: salmon, yellowtail, unagi, seared albacore, crunchy roll, and of course a little sake.  Not sure if I should be drinking anything yet, but I can't have sushi without sake.  It's the only bad thing about it.

I hope everyone is feeling reasonably well.  And everyone who is in treatment still -- I will be hoping that you have an especially good weekend.  I'll be thinking about all of you.  

I'm thankful for a lot right now, but I'm very thankful for ALL of you.  You've made this time so much easier and given me so many laughs.  I love you all!

Anonymous

Happy Thanksgiving ladies!

Virginia - you look absolutely gorgeous - I LOVE your hair!  Hopefully in 2 months that will be me!!!!

Mandy

VirginiaNJ

Happy Thanksgiving all!!! 

I am all teary eyed because exactly one year ago today I was diagnosed...  Boy, a lot sure has happened in 1 year...and I certainly have LOTS to be thankful for.

Mandy- you are a sweetheart...thank you for you kind words.  I went back last night and looked at each picture...month-to-month...  There is a HUGE difference between last month and this month!!  You all will be giving yourselves the Heat Miser hair-do before long!!

Thanks ladies for your constant support!!

xoxoxo

Virginia 

VirginiaNJ

Oh, and Traci- please let your Cowboys go easy on my pathetic Jets today! 

LOL 

ocinny414

Happy Thanksgiving everyone,

I'm doing ok.  Have 3 invitations to go someplace for dinner.  I dont feel like going anywhere.  Need to get up and moving and see how I feel.  These meds are kicking my butt.  Even with the nausea meds I threw up a couple times yesterday and didn't feel like eating anything.  Bagel and cream cheese stayed down in the morning and then 1/2 a hamburger (my son bbqed it for me braving the cold and snow).  Today I ate a pop tart and it has stayed down so far. 

Well I spoke to soon.  It stayed down for a few hours.  Gonna be a long haul this time I think.  I hope I start feeling better soon.  I hate not feeling good.

Well time to go take a nap again.  Then decide if I want to go over to anyones house today.  I've had a couple of invites and need to do something cause my poor son deserves some turkey and pumpkin pie even if I dont feel like it.

CindyKS

chemo072

Cindy - maybe choose a house to go to with a good couch!  That way you can curl up with a blanket and your son can join the festivities and bring you mint tea or whatever will settle your stomach. If you can manage to get out the door then those celebratory memories will stay with your son, we hope.

Sorry you're feeling crummy! 

amanda 

cinrae123

Happy Thanksgiving every one.  I havent posted in a while,,,,,,been a tad on the busy side.  I will write more later,,,,,,,but just wanted to pop in to say Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiii and have a great Thanksgiving Day.  We all do have a lot to be grateful for,,,,,,,,,,,,,we are here living and kicked this cancers butt big time.  Thats enough to be thankful for I think,,,,,,,,,,

Take care and,,,,,,,,,,,ooooooooo and dont eat tooooooooo much.  lol   I know I will be,,,,,,,,I have been salivating for turkey dinner.  lol

Cindy

Anonymous

Hi everyone,

Hope you all enjoyed (or are enjoying) your Thanksgiving dinners!  I have the afternoon off and came home with BIG plans!  I was going to clean the house, go for a run, make dinner then have a bath and read some new magazines I just bought...except I (foolishly) decided to come to this website instead.

I've been on Tamoxifen for a couple of weeks now and STILL no hot flashes.  This has me very worried.  I know the correlation between hot flashes and survival and I always feel terrified when I really think about it.  So, I went into the hormone therapy thread, and read a bunch of stuff that made me feel like krap, then continued on to the Recurrent and mets board (to check on a fellow Albertan) and read a lot there that made me feel EVEN worse - so now for the first time in 8 months, I feel like bawling my eyes out and am pissed that I wasted over 2 hours. 

I think I need a break from this board.  Its' too easy to get into the whole thing - especially when I'm home alone and have the time to READ!  Funny, when I first sat down at the computer, it was nice and sunny outside but now it's grey and overcast - much like my mood!

I wish each and everyone of you all the very best and I will keep you in my thoughts... but for now, I really need to get away from here.

Take care everyone,

Mandy

VirginiaNJ

Mandy--- Hugs girl!!!  When I did the Tamoxifen the first go-round (Feb-April) I had NO SE's...no hot flashes...  Maybe a little crankiness...   But who knows if it was the Tamoxifen...

Then, when I went on it in July, I got the hot flashes...well, lets not even call them hot flashes...they were little "waves" of warmth...I never broke out into those all out sweats...  Anyhoo, they only lasted a short while.  I told my onc this last week and she was HAPPY and said that I was LUCKY.  So, I wouldn't feel panicked about not having major SE's...  They could still come... 

I guess I am naive and have not read anything about the Tamoxifen...  I just pop the pill every day and hope that it's doing it's thing.  My gyno is FREAKED that my ovaries are so active, but the onc is fine with it b/c she doesn't want me going into menopause (bones/heart health, etc).

Anyhow, sending you big cyber hugs...  I hope you don't leave the board...  I would really miss your posts!!

Take care...

Virginia 

Traci-----TripNeg

Hey ladies.

I put up my tree today. I woke up this morning early and just got going. It looks really pretty. I did all white lights this year. I was sitting, relaxing, having a glass of wine and feeling pretty good about getting it done and getting in the spirit. Then, I thought of you guys and thought I'd come on and say Hi. I hit the active conversation button and ....I'm so sad to say that we lost another sister.... Jacque.

She was just diagnosised in Dec '06. She was one of the first girls to talk to me on this board. Sometimes it's like we just can't get a break! It's an emotional roller coaster. I HATE THIS FREAKING DISEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Virginia, thank you for making me smile. You had me laughing through tears about your lawn guy. Your hair looks just like mine. I hate it. (just kiddin') You wear it better than I do. Maybe it's got something to do with that smile of yours.

I'm going to bed with a heavy heart tonight. That Jacque was a real nice person.

I promise the next time I sign on, it will be with a happy attitude.

Love you girls.

Traci

chemo072

"but the onc is fine with it b/c she doesn't want me going into menopause (bones/heart health, etc)."

Virginia - I get the impression that my onc can't wait for me to go into menopause!  Wow, what a difference in opinion.  Good to know!  I personally don't want to, that's just me, kind of a fan of letting my body's wisdom/nature take its course (apart from that damn invading cancer that is)

Traci, Mandy, I hear ya, the deaths on this board are really sad. (And off the board as well, I keep finding blogs I really like only to find that the author passed on.  At the young age of 30 or some such. )  And the amt of misery depressing.  But every once in while, there's a piece of info. that makes a big difference in my life.   

As do you all,

Big hugs,

Chin up,

Amanda 

VirginiaNJ

Amanda- yes, my NJ onc is definitely way opposed to me going into early menopause.  I have a friend who had DCIS and IDC and various other flukey things...she's maybe 43 or 44...a couple years older than me... Her onc in NYC (which was my original onc) gives her shots every 3-4 months to put her INTO menopause.  When I mentioned this to my NJ onc, she was like, "NO WAY" why would you want to do that at your young age and she went on and on.  My NJ onc is a scream...41...same age as me.  It's really wild.  I eat food for a living, and she cures people of cancer...

Traci- thanks for the kind words...I look like a total doofus in these pics, but I have to post them just b/c I am so crazy about the hair growth.  I think I look like a super dork....but that's ok...I kinda am a superdork...

Mandy- thinking of you...hope you are getting out of your funk.  I really think it's the holiday season...sometimes it makes people goofy happy.  I know I always get melancholy b/c I miss people I love like my Mom and my favorites Aunts...stuff like that...  

CindyKS- hope you had a good Thanksgiving given the circumstances...  (I hope you weren't too terribly sick).

Thinking of all you gals...Liz, LeeAnne, Cindy...everyone who I haven't called out specifically (chemo brain is working again...)

Oh, spent the day in the hospital with my Dad...  Can I say that I am SICK OF HOSPTIALS!  (At least though, it wasn't me who was getting poked and prodded....)  My dad is ok, just has a lot of edema from congestive heart failure...  He's 80 years old and when I got there tonight he had is back (or should I say BUTT) to the door using the plastic urinal.  I almost passed out...there are just some things a daughter is NOT supposed to see...like her dad's BUTT!  Thanks GOD I didn't see anything other than his butt...  UGH.  I was like, "DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAD, you are showing the MOON all over the place...PLEASE...."  How MORTIFYING!  Anyhow, that's my laugh for the day...me and my dad's full moon....

Happy Sunday to all...

Virginia 

chumfry

Gosh, Virginia, if I got to be 80 years old, I don't think I'd care who saw my butt! LOL

--CindyMN

Traci-----TripNeg

Hey girls.

Feeling better today. Went over to my mom's again. We ran out of tile in the bathroom. Good grief!!! It's never going to be done.

What's wrong with Mandy? (No pen and paper tonight obviously)

CindyKS, and everybody....hope your doing o.k.

I can't wait to get these concrete turtles out of my chest! Woo Hoo! Wednesday can't come fast enough.

I'm putting lights on the outside of my house tomorrow. Oh and...I had some buyers interested in my house yesterday. They were here for over an hour. Did y'all know I had my house up for sale? Trying to simplify my life. He is a realtor and said he was going to list his at a price to make it sale, and then put an offer on mine. His wife said while I was talking to them "I know I'm not suppose to say this but....I LOVE THIS HOUSE!" I thought that was hysterical because I did the same thing and my realtor at the time kicked me in the shin and told me shhhhhhhhhhhh. I ended up paying full price. LOL!

I missed you guys while I was gone. Hope everybody checks in soon so I know how everybody is doing.

Hugs, Traci

ps Virginia....how's the lawn guy???? I wanna come to NJ (in the summer) and party with you girl! Weren't we all talking about going to Vegas?

pss I watched the movie 1408 starring my fantasy boyfriend John Cusack tonight...pretty cool flick! (kinda scary for you scardy cats)

VirginiaNJ

CindyMN- you are totally right...  I should be so lucky to live to 80!!  It's amazing the difference in genes on each side of the family...  Both my Dad's parents lived 'til 80...and my Dad.  My mom and mom's side...well, not so much...

Traci- I love the "idea" of my landscaper...  LOL  I never even saw him.  We have a huge Mexican population in this part of the country (who'da thunk it), so I'm sure it was a crew from Mexico.  I am just totally in love with the fact that I don't have to rake leaves.  I am still giddy over it.  My brother, god bless his soul, came over yesterday to hook up my wireless router and climbed up on my roof to blow leaves out of the gutter.  Guess he deserves something extra special from Santa!!  I also love John Cusak...but I don't like scary movies!!  LOL  Hope the renovations are at least near the end...

Ok, enough babbling.

Talk to you all soon.

Virginia 

VirginiaNJ

Oh, and PS...I would LOVE to meet you gals!  Whether we pick Vegas or someplace in the middle...I think that would be a HOOT!!

And Traci- ANY time you want to visit NJ---please---I live 20 minutes from mid-town Manhattan...great local for visiting!! 

Equinecandy

Hi !  I'm Candy and I'm not sure people still come here now at the comments seem to be from last spring.  I start chemo tomorrow and am so nervous I could cry.  I don't cry, however.  I've enjoyed reading everyone comments too.  Candy

ocinny414

Hi Candy.  Good luck tomorrow.  The first chemo treatment is a little scarey and I was nervous as well.  Just hang in there and make sure you take something to do and maybe some comfort food, depending on your meds you might be there for a couple of hours.  {{{{hugs}}}} to you.

I had a good Thanksgiving.  Ended up going to my old neighbors house and just hanging out.  I ate or grazed, since I'm eating small meals.  The turkey was good and I love mashed taters so that plus a little pumpkin pie is what I ate.  We watched the new Die Hard movie.  It was pretty good.  Lots of action and kept me awake.  LOL

Darn typing is hard right now cause my cat was laying on my chest and now is on my lower arms.  My laptop is on a lapboard on my lap and the cat is now laying over my arms.  I can just move my fingers.  He's such a goofy cat.

Yesterday I went to a Japanese steak house with the same friends I had Thanksgiving with.  There were like 12 of us.  We had a blast, and didn't get in trouble.  LOL Last time we all went out we got in an ice fight at Old Chicago.

I'm feeling pretty good these last 2 days.  Hope this keeps up.  I can handle feeling like crud for 3-4 days after treatment if I can continue to bounce back and feel good the rest of the time.

I go to the onc again on Thursday,  I'll be sure and update what she says.

Have a great Sunday afternoon,

CindyKS

Traci-----TripNeg

CindyKS!!!!

So happy to see such a happy post! I'm so glad you are feeling good for the holidays. That's funny about your cat. I have a cat named Dallas that I love!

Speaking of Dallas......Cindy...what the heck are you doing watching Die Hard when the Cowboys are playing?????????? LOL!!!!

I love.......going to Japenese Steak Houses. We have Arigato's here and it is my fave resturant.

Virginia....1/2 way is like South Carolina or something isn't it? We gotta get more adventerous (sp?) than that right?!!!  ooops.....anyone here for SC?? If so, sorry! Oh and, my lawn maintenence guys no habla engles either. It's pretty funny when I try to tell them I want something done! They are all real nice though. So, I guess you never saw "Saw" did ya? Boy, that was a scary.................movie!  I highly recommend it!

I started to put my Christmas lights outside and wouldn't you know it....1 out of the first 5 strands of lights worked completely! ARGH!!! I went to Home Depot and got this tool that helps you solve the problem. It was pretty cool actually. It helped me fix my reindeer in like 2 minutes!

Hope everybody is o.k.

Hugs!

Traci

Lorain

Hope you all had a happy Thanksgiving!  We had 9 family members at my house.  The food turned out great and the company fun.  Then my husband Bruce and I went shopping for Christmas on Saturday...got most of it done.  I'll do the rest online.  I do plan on doing cards, but I always do.  It'll seem weird saying I had cancer this year...like it's no big news or something. 

CandyKS - Our thoughts and prayers are with you.  As Mandy said, the second time for her wasn't quite as bad.  I hope that's true for you.  I think they'll treat you and you'll be on the road to recovery!  Do keep us informed as we all care.

Mandy - We miss you...I hope you come back to this forum...you've always added a lot to the conversation.

Virginia - Congrats on the acknowledgements from your boss on your commitment to your job this year through it all!  How nice to be thanked...it's so easy to take off when you're not feeling well...and takes a LOT to continue working.  I don't know how you did it.  For one month this summer I just couldn't have worked...about 3 weeks into my chemo.  Wow!  I couldn't do anything!

Traci - Hope you sell your house soon if that's what you want.  I can't believe all the stuff you did to your mom's house...what a great daughter!  Have you ever been married?  I can't remember you talking about a husband.

Candy - Welcome!  This is an active forum and we have experience as most of us have been through chemo at least once and rads also.  

I've got 12 days of rads behind me...only 21 to go!  I still haven't have any SE's, but I have in tissue expanders, which make my chest hard and tight, not drouppy like my old breasts!  The skin doesn't lay on other skin.  So far so good.  I even have LOTS of energy!  

Thinking of all of you....Lorain 

chemo072

Lorain - glad things are going well!

Mandy - you are coming back aren't you?  Just a little break.

Traci -  You are amazing, with the energy to put up a xmas tree and reindeer, oh my.  

And I saw your post about yet another angel...there've been way too many women with mets who've passed recently.  It's so damn sad.  Raises huge issues for me about how much treatment one accepts vs. quality of life, or if the only quality of life there is is available through treatment.  Heavy of heart here.  And good for you girl for being such a friend to so many.

Hugs to all, 

chemo072

PS Virginia - your hair is really cute!

and Candy, hope tomorrow goes well! deep breaths....

VirginiaNJ

Hi Girls,

I am happy to report that there were no Daddy butt sightings yesterday!  His spirits were better (the diuretics are working and making the edema go away), so perhaps he "cares" a little more...  It's been tirinig going to the hosptial...  I am trying not to be selfish as he's been there for me when I've needed him the most...like all my life.

You gals with the decorating and shopping (and house remodeling) put me to SHAME!!

Yesterday was another milestone...I pulled the BLOW DRYER out!  LOL  Made my hair really fluffy...and I actually have BANGS!  See, the next picture is going to look totall different.

Candy- good luck today...  Drink LOTS of water...it really helps.  What kind of chemo regimen will you be on??  I got off "easy" and only had to have 4 rounds of AC chemo...followed by 1 year of Herceptin...

Ok girlies...thinking of all of you.

Oh, Traci- how about Graceland to see my boyfriend Elvis??  LOL  Wouldn't THAT be a hoot?  I was actually thinking of some place in the middle of the US so our California gals (Liz, Cindy) and our west coast gals had a shorter trip.  I know CindyMN and her crew met in Chicago...

Happy Cyber Monday...  Today is supposed to be the big on-line shopping day...

Take care.

Virginia

(thanks for all the kind words you guys...I heart you all)

VirginiaNJ

Candy- below is a link for a thread for gals who started chemo in Nov of this year.  It might be helpful for you to join that discussion as well.  We here in the May '07 group can tell you how we fared (since most of us have finished already).  But, the thread below is for gals who are on a similar time schedule as you.  Please let us know how you make out.  Best of luck...

Virginia

http://community.breastcancer.org/topic/69/conversation/694264?page=6

Traci-----TripNeg

Virginia....................BANGS??????????? Now, I'm really jealous.

Hey girls....just popping in real quick (I should be working) Listen, if you can.....there is a thread labeled "Bimmer & Diane" on the mets thread.

Twink has a great idea and I hope y'all can help. They are financially desperate. So much so that Bimmer told us. Twink suggested if we each sent $20 how much it would mean to them.

I don't know if y'all have seen there story...Amy, I know you have...but Diane is very ill. Bimmer thinks she will die very soon. They are trying "one last chemo" that isn't even FDA approved yet.

If you want to send a card & $20 (or, just a card...there is another thread calling for a "card shower" for them) PM me and I will give you their address. I got it from Bimmer so the girls could send Diane an afhgan...which they did. So nice.

Love ya girls. I'll check in later!!!

Hugs, Traci

Traci-----TripNeg

k....Had a chance to catch up.

Mandy....I'm sorry that you read stuff that got you upset. I'll never forget the day I found out having triple negative was bad on this board. Just please try to keep in mind we are all different. And forgive me but....didn't your chemo put you into menopause? It sure did me. I was 40 when dx and got my last period (that lasted 21 days) after my second treatment. Since then, nothing.

I understand you need a break. Take one but please check in every once in awhile to say Hi. What has grown into our group, would not be the same without you.

CindyKS - Sorry you're having a rough time. That sucks that even with the naseua medication you still are getting sick. That sucks! I hate getting sick. How old is your son? I hope you start feeling better soon girl.

Other Cindy - What...did you eat so much you can't type? Where the heck are you??

Virginia - Your dad butt thing made me think of my dad. He got pretty bad before he died and I actually had to help him aim into the urinal. I wonder who's going to take care of my butt when I'm old.

Lorraine - having said that....I was married but he told me after 7 years of marriage that he had changed his mind and he didn't want kids. So, devastated, I left. Looking back...I should have just stayed. I loved him so much that I didn't want to even look at another man and then alot of time passed and I tried in-vetro with a male friend...that didn't work....and then I got cancer....who's gonna take care of my butt??????? : ) Only 21 rads to go!!! You go girl!!

Liz - yuck...you eat sushi? Do you really think you should be eating stuff that has a death rate associated with it ... with out the mention of cancer???!!!! LOL! I'd rather eat the frozen butt of my fellow crashed airline passangers than eat raw fish. Yucky!! lol. Are you feeling better?

Leeanne - What a nice message. One year when I was a little on the poor side, I gathered a bunch of family pics and took them all to Target to get copied for each of my siblings and my parents. I bought matching little book size photo albums with "family" on the outside and put all the same pictures, in the same order in all the albums except for the cover picture. I changed that to match the person. Now, no matter whose house I go to, you see that little album on display somewhere and the best part...I think the prints were like 7 cents each and the albums were $4-5 so I spent less than $10 bucks on all the adults in the family and, they all love them. (I'm not talking scrapbooking). Good Lord...two of my sisters have gotten into that and my one sis that lives in Dallas (I'll be with you in a minute Virginia : ) came to visit when I had my bi-mast and she had two bags. One little one for her shorts and t-shirts and one big one for her scrapbooking crap! Unbelievable! I couldn't afford to get into that hobby!

Amanda - I'm with you this year. All I'm getting is cards. No presents from Aunt Traci this year. It's been a crappy year and my finances show it.

Virginia......I thought you were a Giants fan! I was glued to the t.v. during that lovely Thanksgiving Day game. Not only did I get out of helping to clean (I always help clean) but I got to watch my Boys win another one! Man, I was biting my nails hoping the Eagles would beat the Patriots last night. Oh well, we shall see. : ) Dallas plays Green Bay......Lord help us!

And.....does anybody have a map? Is there anything in Oklahoma? That's in the middle right? Or.................we could plan on going to Dallas and going to a game next season! Woo Hoo!!!!!

Love you girls. Tons.

Nighty Nite. Ambien is kickin' in.

Hugs, Traci

lizzzy

Hey Traci,  You made me laugh out loud ... as usual.  Of course I love sushi.  It's the best!  It took me a while to get over all the yucky connotations but once I did I have to have it almost weekly now.  My white blood count is on the high side now so I'm not worried.  And I'm feeling better every day. Not back to normal, but who knows if I'll ever be back to normal.

Aren't you having surgery tomorrow?  I can't wait to have my expanders out.  I have two more weeks to go.  Let us know how it goes !!!

Hi to everyone.  I have to go finish my work now--I have a half hour more to do before I go to sleep. 

cinrae123

omg,,,,,,,,,,im so pissed,,,,,,,,,,,,I just typed a shit load and lost it alllllllllllllllllllllll.  oops,,,,,,,,,sorry bout the swearing,,,,,,,,,lol

Well I will gather my thoughts again tomorrow and start a new one,,,,,,its getting late.  What a dummy I ammmmmmmmmmmmmm.  And it was such a good post too,,,,,,lol

Nite all

Cindy

Traci-----TripNeg

Liz....................YUCKY!!!

I'm gettin' soft boobies tomorrow...I'm gettin' soft boobies tomorrow..I'm gettin' soft booobies tomorrrrroooooooowwwwwww...la,la,la, lah, la,lah, lah!!!!

I can't wait! I'm so excited I can't sleep!!!

I go in at 11:15! Only thing that sucks about that....yep...you all know...no wawa ....no water...no nothin'.....that sucks but......I'm gettin' soft boobies tomorrow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I wished you all lived close by me so y'all could all feel how soft they are gonna be compared to my expanders!!!! YEA!!!!

Can y'all tell I'm happy!!??????

WOO HOO!!!!!!

I'll get online and tell you all about my soft boobs asap.

Love ya tons!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Traci