The Chemosabe March Cruise

playwriter

Melissa, i agree with your daughter. you are BEAUTIFUL! and way too sexy for your hair....

whitecotton

Rosebud I miss your post as you posted the same time as me. thanks I'm drinking the water I think I am going to float away. Yes I have had the weirdest cravings. My skin is getting really dry.

whitecotton

playwriter I tried to post on your blog twice but not sure why it won't post. Just wanted you to know that you are a beautiful and strong woman too. And your daugher is a charmer.

playwriter

that is so weird, cuz other people have told me that, too. so i had a couple of friends try to post yesterday, and it worked. i have it set up for anyone to post, not just registered users. i don't know. maybe cuz i've set up moderation?

taurie

Well all I am finally going to set sail. Chemo date is Wed.
Emend was approved. Got the grape juice, drink lots of water, pack my bag so I dont get bored, take tylenol. Am I missing anything. And Playwriter, your still beautiful.
Dawn

taurie

MissShapen,
I would tell her that the doctor says you need to rest without alot of company and you have had so many well wishers stop in that your quite wore out. Thank her for the offer, tell her you appreciate it alot, you do not need the added worry.

Angelflight

MissShapen
I personally don't care to have people in my house especially those I'm not close to. And I also know what a clean fanatic I am.......so if the house isn't clean I'd tell someone I'm not going to be home.......lol I'd just tell her I appreciate the offer but I'm doing fine but it's your decision.

pmarsh34
Funny how we can muddle along in life and nobody knows about our bc except those we want to know. Then all of a sudden the hair is gone. I felt like everyone in the world was looking at me, and I think they were. I told my girlfriend now it's like having a Tattoo accross your forehead.....she told me to write on the Tattoo "Breast" that way at least they'll know what kind of cancer it is....lol Good luck at Church tomorrow and it's amazing although everyone will look and know they will all be praying for you as well.

rosebud1962
OMG the cravings you wouldn't believe. I have to admit I have put on almost 40lbs from my cancer and I don't mean from the chemo or steroids either. I've done it all by myself. Can't sleep I eat. Stay up all night, I eat. I have tried just about every sleep med over, under and inside the counters of the pharmacy to no avail. Meds just don't work that well on me for some reason. So I average about 4 hours sleep every 3 days or so. Funny thing is my body is adjusting to it and it shouldn't. I need the rest but what's a gal to do. I have been thinking of all the old foods I used to make, cook, eat etc. I've been craving fried rice and eggs for 2 weeks although I've had them 2 times already. Havn't had those in years. Now I'm craving red velvet cake and I mean the original red velvet cake from the south, not the box kind. I thought it was just me and my food addiction right now and who knows maybe it is.....but sure was funny you mentioned it as well.

whitecotton
You just keep a low profile sweetie and those white blood cells will be back in no time. It's amazing how our bodies can recover from stuff like that. I love the story of your daughter comparing you to a cake without icing. Loved it. My son's reaction after I had cried for an hour was to come into my bedroom and say God Mom why did you buzz it off already? I guess having boys is just weird when it comes to stuff like this. When doing bloodwork the following morning the nurse told me "I love your hat and your scarf" and you look so cute!!! I could have kissed her. I needed that boost more than you could know at that moment and I told her so.

MissShapen
I woke up with a headache on day 2 after chemo and had it for 2 days. Mine wasn't due to the chemo but the lack of sleep. Once I finally got a nap for 1 1/2 hours this afternoon it finally went away. Also I've noticed that being without hair has an affect as well. Neck gets chilled pretty easily and sometimes the head at night as well. I wondered if that may have a bit to do with it as well.

HollyHopes
I was the one wondering where you lived. I'm only about 30 minutes from you in Palmdale. Was just curious how close we were.

Ok now for the hat and scarf dilema

Ok here's what the hubby did for me.

Here are the round hooks that the scarves came with at Wal-Mart.


All we had to do was improvise a wire coat hanger. He made a hook in the left side after cutting it open and I just slip the rings on now.



Now for the hats we did the same thing but we used a heavier hanger because of the weight of the hats. I have about 15-20 on there right now but can get about another 10 or so on if I just push them together.



Happy Easter Ladies

Angel

Angelflight

Dawn
We must all be up here at the same time. Missed your post as we were both typing at the same time too. Glad to see you have your sail date. Just make sure you have your Biotene Toothpaste and Mouthwash on hand ahead of time and start using it immediately every day. Do away with the other stuff completely. It will keep you from getting the mouth sores or thrush. Use several times per day. Also make sure you have some Cytaphil lotion on hand as eventually the skin will dry out use it from head to toe after a bath every day. Will prevent breakouts or bleeding that some have had and will also heal the breakouts that some are getting right now. Wal-Mart carries their version of it for about 1/2 the price now.

playwriter
I wish I had the nerve to post on here what I really look like with my hair gone.................NOT!!! You are beautiful in every way and I'm glad you're ok with this.

Angel

taurie

Sara,
I went through the same thing, it got so bad the doctor thought it was a heart attack or blood clot. It ended up being my artery was just really swollen where they connected the port.

taurie

Angel,
Thanks, yes you guys taught me well, been using my Biotene mouthwash and toothpast for about 2 weeks now, the lotion for the same. Thought I would get in the habit. I bought Flax Seed Oil Pills and multi vitamin yesterday, started taking it today. Got lots of juices, like smoothie juices, not real wild stuff, just mellow, got fruit cups, crackers tonight. Gave my mom money to go get stuff to make me homemade soups with lots of broth. And of course am going to eat like a pig tomorrow. Got lots of bottled water and some crystal lite. I have been drinking Dan Active daily. I have Danactivia ready to go. LOL think I am over preparing.
Dawn

musicmom3

Happy Easter!! The Lord is Risen!

It's freezing here in Pennsvlvaia, and we got about 4 inches of white, fluffy snow overnight. It is beautiful, but I prefer blooming trees and flowers at this time of year. We made it to New Jersey and back, heard my daughter's concert. It was beautiful. I wasn't feeling great, but it could have been worse. I didn't start feeling really bad until we got back. I seem to go in and out of the nausea thing, the only thing that tastes good is sweet iced tea. I've been drinking a lot of it.

Melissa: I'm sorry about having to cut your own hair while you were by yourself. My attitude about things is so much better when I have family around. I tend to get a bit mopey if I'm by myself. Your daughter sounds wonderful. If anything good has come of this, I think it has been the renewing of family relationships and appreciating what we have.

I hope that coffee will taste good this morning, I really need it on a snowy April Easter.

Have a Blessed Easter! Jeanne

Angelflight

Dawn,
No matter how prepared you think you are you never are. Just make sure you have a stool softener like Colace lined up. That's the first bout with the chem is constipation from the meds. I am so happy you're finally getting this on the road.......ok you're out of the lifeboat and on your way to the ballroom for your first round of drinks.

Angel

pmarsh34

Happy Easter!!!!!
I went to sunrise service this morning. It is a joint venture with 4 churches in our area. It was at our church (because it was only 26 here this morning!) but I knew only a handful of the people there. I wore a floppy pink hat. It was pretty but I was very self concious because no one else was wearing a hat. My bf said I looked good. But the thing that meant the most was when a woman I had never seen before came up to me and thanked me for wearing it to church because it was beautiful and made her smile! Now that made my day! I actually took my hat and scarf off right in the entrance to the church because someone asked to see my bald head. (It was a man and we were comparing heads - lol) He had more hair than me but not much! I do have a pretty head I think. Maybe I will keep my head bald when this is all over..............hmmmmmmm NOT!!!!!
There isn't a thing in this world that we cannot conquer. Jesus allowed himself to be crucified to insure that we all have a seat in heaven at the right hand of God!

jacqniel

Miss S,
One of the lessons I have learned through my chemo dx & tx is to allow others to do for me. This was (and still is) a hard lesson for me!
This person has offered you a gift of her service. You have been sick, so she doesn't expect to find you in a clean house. Your heat doesn't work? Tell her this. Maybe she can help with a solution. Be up front with her and tell her of your misgivings. Often times, people we don't consider 'close friends' have a different viewpoint. You have obviously touched her in some way for her to make this offer. Many times we ask God for provisions and then turn our backs on his response. Perhaps this is an answer to prayer - don't let your pride stand in the way - embrace it! Hugs, Jacque

whitecotton

Jacque I could never have said it better. You brought tears to my eyes. We do tend to be to proud and turn our backs when we shouldn't.
Melissa

dmknanny

Melissa,
Your daughter is evidently every bit as wonderful as you! What a sweet analogy she made about the cake - and so true! Just think - now you can choose whatever flavor icing you want every day! I just found my good lint roller this morning and believe me it is getting a workout - should be pretty smooth headed in a day or so. My brother in law shaved his head when he heard about mine, so we got to share today - because the wig went as soon as church was over. I think I ate too much or something - have the big D for the first time, and feel like I am sitting on an easter egg too.............gonna go eat my Activa and pray this is short lived..........have too much I want to do tomorrow to let this get me down!
My sister just signed up for the BC Sister Study through hte ACS - 10 year study - let's hope there's a cure before then........
Diana

maxgirl

Love hearing everyone's shaving, wig and scarf-wearing stories -- sounds like there were a number of proud Easter bonnets both outside and inside today.

Pwriter -- You've got a good look there. I was kind of intrigued by my buzz cut at first, but this thinning bowl cut buzz isn't cutting it. Maybe I need to go down to the skin.

And I recommend winter wool hats for chilly heads. Doesn't the shower water feel weird running off your head, too? It doesn't fall in the "right" places.

Angel, that's quite a collection you've got and a good way to organize it.

Jacque -- Nicely put about allowing other people to help us. Now if only I could always manage that myself. I know that during a sister's illness I found new friends who came through when old ones couldn't.

Musicmom -- Congrats on making it to your daughter's concert without too much discomfort. I'm in awe of you!

Dawn -- You've gotten a lot of good advice for your 1st tx. The only thing I would add is that go carefully when your appetite returns as far as spicy and acidic foods go, especially if you have any tendency toward cold sores. I was extra careful this time and while my diet is deadly boring, my mouth isn't stinging (knock on wood).

I lazed around yesterday just reading, which was rather nice. I wasn't hungry but not too nauseated either. Today I managed to eat a fairly decent Easter dinner at my brother's. Back to work tomorrow, but I doubt it will be a full day.

maxgirl

Quote:

---

Melissa,
I think I ate too much or something - have the big D for the first time, and feel like I am sitting on an easter egg too....
Diana

---

Diana -- Just wanted you to be aware this could really be the Big C, with the D working around the blockage. Tread carefully!!

Anonymous

I started out today feeling pretty bad, but at the moment am feeling quite well! This is day #4 after tx #2 for me. This is much better than last time.

Thanks to everyone who had input on the situation with my friend who offered help. She is actually on her way here and will be here within a couple of hours.

Jacque, I appreciated your post. This could very well be an answer to prayer and it would be very prideful to turn it down. I hope it goes well. I just spoke to her and she was surprised that I sounded so good. I told her I was feeling good and maybe we could spend our time visiting with each other. She said that wasn't what she had in mind, but okay. So I am kind of feeling like I have put her to trouble and I don't need help. I was sick yesterday and had no idea I would feel better so much more quickly this time. Oh well. I am going to play it by ear and let the Lord lead. It will be okay in the end. Maybe it can be a time of renewing for both of us. Many years ago I spent the night at her house with her three children while she was in the hospital having #4. She now has five and her youngest is 13. So lots of years behind us, but not much contact in the last ten years.

I am very encouraged about feeling better and if I can recover in two days, I may be able to get back to work!

Patti , Hooray for you being brave enough to take off your hat at church. We take ourselves much too seriously most of the time, don't we?

Dawn, the only thing I'm doing different next time is taking a Senakot the day of chemo. I took Fibermucil and drank prune juice, but that wasn't enough. I did recover from it much more easily this time, though.

I appreciate all of you and my prayers and thoughts are with you. Thanks for sharing yourselves!

I wanted to share this link for all the Christian sisters on this cruise. I Can Only Imagine

Miss S

Cynthia1962

I have my second AC tomorrow. I'm almost as emotional this time as I was last time. Just not looking forward to feeling so awful and cranky again. I also find out the results of my bone scan. It's been almost 2 weeks since I had it. Talk about feeling anxious.

I shaved my head on Tuesday after my hair starting coming out on Monday. Haven't worn my wig yet, I'm comfortable wearing scarves instead. I'm not uncomfortable being in public, but when I notice someone looking at me, it suddenly takes me out of the moment and reminds me why I'm bald which brings on the fear. So, I'm trying to come up with something positive to tell myself instead of thinking about how I have cancer.

Good luck to my fellow cruisers having your cocktails this week. I'll be thinking about you and those still recovering from their recent cocktails. I probably won't be up to posting this week if I'm as fatigued as last time, but I'll be reading everyone's posts and wishing you the best.

Cynthia

playwriter

Max girl, if u decide to go to the skin, just don't use a razor cuz of the risk of infection if u get cut. i had to go really close to the skin cuz i'd been pulling out large clumps, and it was kind of a patchwork look....i can't wait till all the stubble falls out so i can go commando.

pmarsh34

MissS, thank you for the link. It was just what I needed to hear this morning.

Playwriter, that is really good advice about not using a razor. It was something I hadn't thought about but luckily the barber who did my buzz was smart enough to know.

One of the hardest emotions for me to deal with has been the guilt of being able to do somethings and not being able to do everything. I was able to mow part of the lawn last week but someone is doing my laundry for me every week. I was able to do some cooking, bake some muffins, and watch a baseball game (although I was pretty squirmy by the end - uncomfortable plastic stadium seats!). But, I wasn't able to change the sheets on the beds, clean the bathroom, vaccuum the floor, drive the kids to school everyday, etc., etc., etc. This has been a really good week but yet on Saturday, instead of going to buy easter stuff for my girls, I sat down and ended up having a three hour nap. We have to accept the help that is offered regardless of what we are able to do ourselves. Cancer is the one time in my life where I have not been able to "do it all". I can't be mom, dad, worker-bee, gardener, cook, dishwasher, house-cleaner, etc. Maybe I wasn't able to do it all before but I was giving it quite a run. This disease has a way of changing you. It slows you down by necessity. I don't think that is such a bad thing. It has helped me to remember what is important in this life. It doesn't really matter if the bathroom is dirty (heck, I have been in a few stores where the bathroom was pretty bad and it never stopped me from going, just from sitting!). My kids aren't getting sick from the house not being as clean as I kept it before. They are gaining some life experiences from my illness that they would not otherwise have. I wish none of us had to go through this and I also wish that none of our families and friends had to witness it. But I do thank God everyday for the lessons we all learn from it. I know that having cancer is not really a blessing but all the change it has created in me is a true blessing. I just pray that God uses it to bring blessings to people I come in contact with.
Thank you again for each and everyone of you for being here to offer encouragement and advice. You have all been a blessing to me.

jacqniel

Miss S - My favorite song!!!! I tried to find a link for this song for my blog, but couldn't find it! Thanks so much - I will put it on there now. Jacque

maxgirl

My scalp must have heard me about going down to the skin, because those short buzz hairs are falling out even faster. I can't imagine what a mess it would be if my hair were long.

I was reading the Taxol thread and see that that's when the eyebrows go. Sigh.

Pmarsh -- We really do need constant permission to rest as much as we need to and to do only what we can. The only alternative is to be completely exhausted all the time and not have enough energy for anything.

LisaSDCA

Goodness, I've got a lot of catching up to do! There's no possibility of my mentioning everyone, so just consider yourselves all {{{hugged}}}.
Sara - good to hear even a brief check-in from you. I found Day #5 was my toughest day from my first infusion , too. Who woulda thought? Have you gotten any relief - or at least an answer - about your port? I was imagining it having escaped your vena cava and poking someplace entirely inappropriate - but I admit I can be a bit of an alarmist about these things.
Melissa, I'm so sorry you had such a tough time this round with your ulcer and hospitalization. I pray that you are feeling stronger now, and that your tummy is healing.
Patti - glad you discovered you have a pretty head - that was sweet of your church friend to thank you for wearing a hat for Easter. I wore a hat, too, but I still had hair curling out from all around it, so I don't think anyone guessed. Yet.
Angel - thanks for the pix. I can't believe how extensive your cap collection is already! You are set to go!
Jacque, your wise counsel about allowing others to "do" for us was something I needed to hear, too. Thank you for your gentle insight. Hope your treatment went smoothly today. Thinking strong, healing thoughts for you.
Miss S - wonderful to hear you are having far milder SE's this time! It would help solve so many of your worries, I know, if you felt you could return to work.
Cynthia - thinking of you today with your second infusion happening. Let us know how it went! After you've had a nice rest, of course.
Terri - thank you for sharing your clipping pictures. You've got great bone structure!

Today is Day 27 for me and I've still got hair! It's as though it came out in earnest for a few days and then fizzled for a week or two. I think that now that I'm on Day #5 of round two that it's all going to go right away. I've been stunned (and grateful) that I've been able to go wrap-less this long. Probably by tomorrow it'll be patchy enough that I'd startle the UPS guy if he came knocking, so a wrap or scarf is planned for Tuesday's appointments out. I have several wigs to choose from and they all still look too 'wiggy' - except the shoulder-length fall. I like that one. Maybe that'll be my starting point under a hat tomorrow.
Cheers!
Lisa

playwriter

cynthia -- positive things to tell yourself instead of thinking you have cancer:
you look fabulous, with or without hair
your beauty does not depend on the state of your follicles
you are too sexy for your hair
you are a great, warm, competent woman that people like and are drawn to

concentrate on this day, the day you have today, and making it a great day. this day you have friends, people who love you, shelter, food, books to read, crafts to do, [hopefully] pets to caress and spoil, great weather outside......

something else that works for me when i want to throw myself a pity party -- i do something kind for someone else. that gets my attention off me and onto others. it can be as little as giving $1 to the Will Work For Food guy at the corner, or calling a friend i haven't spoken to in a while, whatever.

marshabel

Dawn - Good luck on your maiden voyage on Wednesday. I know it's bittersweet, but now you will really be on the path to recovery! Keep your eyes on the horizon.....

I didn't post any this weekend, cuz I was kinda bummed, and having tummy troubles after #2 last week. I had called the onc on Friday with my questions about my scans and the change in my meds for the next chemo treatment, but never got a call back until today. The nurse said that my bone scan shows degenerative arthritis in my ankle and foot (who knew?) and the CT shows a nodule on my lung. She said the doctor does not think it is anything to worry about, but will just require frequent chest Xrays to follow it. She said that this is NOT a sign of mets. As for the change in my medication - that was a mistake on the schedule. It should say adria, not aredia. GOOD GRIEF!!!! They say not to worry???? Watch your charts, girls!

Marshabel

dmknanny

OK, Playwriter (who is looking HOT, BTW!) gave me instructions on how to post a picture, so here goes.........
this is me and DH after we shaved each other's heads last Tuesday

Angelflight

Just checking in with everyone. Love the pics of the buzz cuts. I'd never have the nerve to post mine. I hate it and did finally go bald. The buzz was too scratchy.

Been feeling fabulous all week except for really bad heartburn. Seems I've been popping my heartburn meds all day long for about 3 days now. Helps for a while and then it's right back. If that's all I have to worry about I'm not going to worry at all.

I've been busy with the nice weather and working around the house a lot and painting all of my garden statues. I have tons of them and they needed a face lift. I'll finish all those tomorrow and be done with them finally. Got the jacuzzi cleaned out and back up and running but havn't been in it as yet. Still just use my jacuzzi tub. My side patio was a mess with weeds as the contractors were using it last summer when we did all the renovations here so had a big mess out there to get cleaned up. I'm so glad it's finished.

Wishing all those with cocktails this week the best of luck. Hope the se's will be minimal. They say #3 is the worst and I'm not looking forward to that one but who knows. It just might be the easiest...(crossing fingers).

As far as the hat collection most of those were baseball caps I got for Disneyland. Just got another order today from headcovers.com again and I'm still collecting...lol

Love to you all,
Angel

playwriter

DMKnanny -- you look FABULOUS! Just wear some big ole earrings, and everyone will think you're buzzed as a fashion choice...