Illinois ladies facing bc

aviva5675

I preface this here by saying I didnt need chemo so didnt have to go thru this personally. Until I found out I didnt need it tho, I went thru alot of thinking and worrying about it and checking out scarf sites, etc... I think I would have been a cap on over bald head person, but I dont know. In any case, I put this on my fb, and wanted to share. Hope its ok.

This is a beautiful picture, and the more people share their cancer stories, the better.

So why are they making such a huge deal of her deciding to take the
picture without her wig on? Another example of women being given 2d
citizen status when men go bald all the time. In fact, these days its
almost de riguer for men to shave their heads when their natural bald
spots become too much for them.

So why can't women be given the same value? Not only does this woman and many who
go thru cancer have to deal with that- but they also have to deal with
the stigma foisted on them by our culture of being a bald woman.

Maybe this will help change that as well.

zap

Aviva, a great post! It is all just culturally induced! Why did they look upon guys In the 60s as weird with long hair? Why do a few people look at men wearing kilts as odd?  Cultural! Why did nose rings look okay on lovely Nigerian women but strange on American girls?  Why is purple or pink hair strange? So why is a bald headed woman with cancer a shocking and courageous move when some men routinely shave heads and courage is not even a connection to that lifestyle choice? It is okay for a catholic nun to wear a veil but we often mistrust women in burkas! This is something worth discussing. Susan

aviva5675

those are some great analogies!

IllinoisLady

Everything is a miracle,
not just the beautiful and lovely things.
- Anonymous

IllinoisLady

There really are too many judgments aren't there???  So much that is wrong if you are male or female, rich or poor, witty or quiet and yet we are all one -- for one to be BETTER, someone else must be worst, but we are  all still one.

Jackie

p.s.  I have been doing another of my marathon stints at work -- so blessed that I can, and so grateful.  I'm not going to re-read what I wrote because I'm not sure I made much sense, but loving the conversation.

Blessings

Jackie

IllinoisLady

Happiness blooms
in the presence of self-respect
and the absence of ego.
Love yourself.
Love everyone around you.
Love everyone in the whole world.
Know that your own life is of infinite importance,
as is every other life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

IllinoisLady

To get the most out of life, we must take the time to live as well as to
make a living.  We must practice the art
of filling our moments with enriching experiences that will give new meaning and
depth to our lives.  We should take time
for good books; time to absorb the thoughts of poets and philosophers, seers
and prophets. . . . Time for nature; time for flower gardens, trees, birds and
sunsets.  Time to love and be loved, for
love is the greatest thing in the world.                                                                                                                                                                                

Wilfred A. Peterson 

 

Love really is the greatest thing in the world.

Blessings

Jackie

 

IllinoisLady

You lose the very life you seek when you wallow in stupid luxuries.  You don’t need nine-tenths of the things you scramble for.  Don’t be afraid to have
nothing.  Happiness is not what you have, but who you are.  You are already who you need to be.

Diogenes

IllinoisLady

Blessed is the person who can enjoy the small things, the common beauties, the little day-by-day events; sunshine on the fields, birds on the bough, breakfast, dinner, supper, the daily paper on the porch, a friend passing by.  So many people who go afield for enjoyment leave it behind them at home.
 
David Grayson

Redheaded1

So loved the last two quotes and the comments about Joan Lunden's picture., from Aviva and Zap.  Ladies, Have a great October.

aviva5675

I am grateful for the October BC stuff for about 10 minutes. Then angry about every product there is being pink even tho many dont contribute in any way to a cure. Somehow a once good idea has turned into a marketing ploy. I wonder if there are pink Happy Pinktober Hallmark cards?  Cynical, I know, but there it is.

lago

Remember some of that money that doesn't go to a cure goes to things like supporting this website, support groups for family, free wigs etc. Granted we need to be smart. If we want our money to go to research for metastatic disease there are places that specifically do that. If you are interested PM offlist and I will give you a few. I don't post it here because bc.org is also a non-profit that needs funds to run. And this site does provide a huge needed service for all stages of the disease.

IllinoisLady

The ingredients of happiness are so simple that they can be counted on
one hand.  First of all, happiness must
be shared.  Selfishness is its enemy; to
make another happy is to be happy one’s self. 
It is quiet, seldom found for long in crowds, most easily won in moments
of solitude and reflection.  It comes
from within, and rests most securely on simple goodness and clear conscience.

William Ogden

aviva5675

saw this morning a Land End thing- if you get one of the 6 choices of pink embroidered designs, including the BCO symbol, most of the money for the embroidery add on goes to BCO. Since I know BCO is a site that does so much- that is cool!

MCbeach

I know there is a lot of cynicism about Pinktober, and everyone is entitled to their opinion.  For me,  Pinktober last year was the nagging reminder to actually go back 7 months after the last "bad" mammogram.  I had been putting it off and finally resigned to go in.  I was never expecting the positive results. 4 surgeries later, I have much more awareness of bc and a view of life that I never had before.  For my situation, I will be forever thankful for the pink-washing. And yes, I now understand how little goes to the research and how that needs to change to benefit other stages.  Most who have never been touched by bc have no idea about that tho.  So, imho, the campaign of Pinktober should be BOTH awareness AND funding for innovations/research.  

lago

I think the issue is not that money isn't going to research. The issue is most of the research money is going for better treatments. It is not going towards finding out what actually causes the disease. That research could actually  lead to a cure or vaccine like they have for HPV. Also less research goes towards metastatic disease. Once they have some good results with a drug for mets they immediately switch gears to studies for early stage and most of the time don't revisit mets.

IllinoisLady

That is the supreme work to which we need to address ourselves in this world, to learn love.  Is life not full of opportunities for learning love?  Every man and woman every day has a thousand of them.  The world is not a playground; it is a schoolroom.  Life is not a holiday, but an education.  And the one eternal lesson for us all is how better we can love.

Henry Drummond

IllinoisLady

Hope you are all fine this morning.  We had such storms yesterday and last night.  We did not lose power but didn't have our Wi-Fi for a while.  The ground this morning is  littered with leaves and twigs and other assorted debris.  Well, I think this is the beginning of the REAL start of how winter begins.  Not too anxious -- seems almost like summer just got here and it is over with so fast.  Sigh !!!

Fall is a beautiful time and thoughts of pumpkin pie and cider should get me excited for some of the changes.

Blessings

Jackie

Redheaded1

Jackie- Last night I was out at my Tai Chi class, then to my quilt guild meeting and when I came home, my power had been out enough to  shut down my computer and mess up all the clocks and the digital equipment.  Loads of rain here.  Cold now-- I just came in from pulling up my Basil and am going to dash to store so I can make pesto cubes for the freezer.   Chance of spotty frost.  Whole house smells spicy from all the basil in the bowl in the kitchen.....

Those of you with memory issues from treatment---you should imagine me trying to remember Tai Chi moves in sequence..... What a hoot.  I am always a tad behind because I have to copy the guy who stands in front of me.... At one point, I just sat down against the wall and the teacher cracked up. 

 

IllinoisLady

Even when walking in a party of three I can always be certain of learning from those I am with.  There will be good qualities that I can select for imitation and bad ones that will teach me what requires correction in myself.
 
Confucius

IllinoisLady

Brrr, dry this morning but chilly.  We have the I-heater on.  It will warm but the overnight temps are starting their decline for the year. 

Hope you all have a wonderful fulfilling day.

Blessings

Jackie

IllinoisLady

Perhaps, indeed, there are no truly universal ethics: or to put it more precisely, the ways in which ethical principles are interpreted will inevitably differ across cultures and eras. Yet, these differences arise chiefly at the margins. All known societies embrace the virtues of truthfulness, integrity, loyalty, fairness; none explicitly endorse falsehood, dishonesty, disloyalty, gross inequity.



Howard Gardner

Redheaded1

Brrr in Cenral IL too.  I am ready to hibernate.....

ritajean

I agree with the BRRRR in our area.  We were in Farmington, IL yesterday on the Spoon River Drive and there were actually snowflakes.....just a few isolated flakes but everyone recognized them!  This is TOO early!  I have one plant that is outside that I want to keep over the winter so I guess I'd better get it brought in tomorrow before the frost does get it.  

Jackie, thanks so much for checking in every day and leaving us some inspiration and things to think about.  You are doing a great job of keeping this thread alive!  Hugs!

IllinoisLady

Your vision will become clear only when you
look into your heart.  Who looks outside, dreams.
Who looks inside, awakens.
 
Carl Jung

IllinoisLady

It has become slow here, hasn't it???  A bit ambivalent --- I think it means that maybe newly diagnosed have slowed as well as those who found this wonderful thread have gotten through their chemo/rads and have transitioned to the new normal so well that they don't need to come so often. 

Can't be sad about either.  Still, feel like the caring and knowledge to be found here as well as the very strong support and guidance through the maize of diagnosis and treatment and the accompanying apprehension and some fearful feelings full of misgivings through the progression of treatments is just as important as ever -- so Yea for all of you while we are still here for anyone who needs us.

Blessings,

Jackie

lago

I've become  lurker but I do check in almost every day.

Waving hello to everyone.

dltnhm

Jackie- 

I read just about every day. Thank you again for your quotes and keeping the IllinoisLadies thread active so that Illinoisans can find information, specialist referrals, connections, and a soft place to land.  Thankful we can support one another here. 

I was just sitting here considering proposing a casual get together for the whosoever could make it. I know they occur from time to time. 

Gotta mull it over a bit more :0) 

IllinoisLady

Thanks Lago and dltnhm -- feels good to be sure someone is there -- never know when someone may come by who needs IllinoisLadies. 

Jackie

doxie

ok, let me stir things up a bit.  New topic.  Kidney stones!  

Looks like I have them in both kidneys, though one may be blocked up with something other than a stone.  Ultrasound was inconclusive.  There are something like 8 different kinds of stones.  Have almost no risk factors or family history for this.  What a surprise! Thankfully only mild pain so far.  Not looking forward to what may come.

Anyone have experience with these?