Starting Chemo in JAN 2007

jonimb

Hello all,

I ended up not going on the Spokane shopping trip. I woke up yesterday morning with a violent headache, and didn't feel well all day.  My friend Anita also had a touch of something, so it's just as well we didn't go.  I'm feeling a bit better today, going to go out for my walk in a few minutes.  It's a tad cold here, but the sun is shining, so THOR thinks it's okay to go.

Cindy, that is a lovely quote, and I agree it does seem like our group.  How are you feeling?  Did you get your drains out yet??

Skye, that chest pain doesn't sound like a whole lot of fun.  Have you tried Aleve.  We can't get Aleve in Canada as it's naproxen and not approved, but I get it by prescription from my oncologist for hip pain.  It really does work.

Rebecca, hope your spirits pick up a bit this week.  You are usually so upbeat it's hard to picture you as being down. 

Mel, how is work going, haven't heard from you in a while.

Mary, I sure hope things turn around for you at your job.  Is there any where else you would prefer to work.  It might be time to get your resume in order.  Best wishes to you on whatever you decide.

Sharon, yes we would have gone thru the Mountains, and then down south of Cranbrook thru Good Grief, Idaho, but now it will have to wait.  Probably just as well, as they are calling for a snowstorm tomorrow.

Happy Thanksgiving to all our Amercian Chemo girls.  It's this Thursday, right?

Welcome to our group Lisa, congrats on finishing chemo.

Big hugs to all....Joni

SISKimberly

Hi Ladies,

I am pretty sure I'll be starting Chemo in Jan., but did you mean '08 rather than '07, or is this a really old message board?

skyedivine

Caya, so happy that your MIL stopped bleeding and is out of the ICU. Hope she continues to improve. And thanks for the affirmation on the quick diagnosis quagmire. I didn't remember that your dh was misdiagnosed with the aneurysm, that is a much more potent thing than rib cartilage inflammation. What we don't all go through!



Rebecca, it seems your doc is on the ball. I'm so glad he didn't quibble. And yes, with the Hashimoto's and your TSH doubling in a year, he'd be crazy not to give you the thyroid blood test. Hope you get some answers real soon. And you mean you don't lie around eating bon bons either, LOL?



My warm bath did make me feel better, I even turned on the whirlpool and resolve to do that more often. Posture seems to have something to do with it too so I am already trying to sit straighter with shoulders back and can often get some immediate relief from that. Another learning curve.



Speaking of learning curves, I went to get my car's oil changed this morning and drove right up behind my favorite place to get in line behind one of the bays, when a man got out of his truck and came over looking at me like I was crazy....the auto lube had closed a month ago, it turns out, and I never even noticed the business had changed. Chemo brain strikes again. - Skye

skyedivine

Joni I just saw your post, hope that headache gets better and thanks for the Aleva tip, I will try to get some. I'll see the doc on Wednesday.

IloveWolf, this is a really old message board, LOL! It was Jan 2007 all right, but you are welcome to chime in. We just can't give up talking to one another. - Skye

Anonymous

I am back from San Antonio. As a business trip it was a big success - although I was really feeling the chemo brain. Trying to keep up with which clients have which issues and getting it right when I run into them between sessions was a bit more than I could handle. Actually - just remembering my room number was a challenge.

I did have a good time and enjoyed hanging out with some friends that were at the same conference.

I've read all of the posts - but am rushing around like crazy today trying to work and get organized to pick up the kids from school.

Big {{{{HUGS}}}} to everyone - it's been a rough week all the way around I'd say.

I missed you all while I was gone  

Nancyab

Rebecca, glad you got the effexor.Keep us posted on how you do on it. Melia, I do feel stronger, I just took my 6th dose of effexor and I am amazed at the difference, even my hot flashes have eased. I am seeing the dentist in the morning for the "bad" tooth and hopefully with that pain gone I will feel like a Million bucks!

Leaving for Atlanta Wednesday and will return home on Sunday. I am leaving my "bum" stepson to take care of the pets, under duress, I might add. My DH (his father) is trying to make him redeem himself, and prove to me that he can be a responsible adult. I hope it's not at the cost of my dogs! I am scared, my MIL said she would check on them too.Thank goodness. It is just an awful awful feeling when you can't trust a family member.

So I got everything ready, I baked pumpkin and banana nut breads to take, made chicken and dumplings for dinner, I made up a basket for my brother's... all with Ohio stuff, they wanted Mike-Sells potato chips (ohio), Esther Price candy, mmmm the best! (ohio) and a bunch of Ohio State souvenirs. GO BUCKS!! I even got their dogs OSU tee shirts! Should be a great Thanksgiving, much better than last year. Last year I sat at my MIL's numb and scared to death, as I just found out 2 days before of the cancer.

So have a wonderful Thanksgiving! Enjoy your families and all the yummy food. I'll check up on you all when I get home. Big hug!

mer1957

Dear Joni, sorry to hear that you couldn't make your trip.  Sounds like a little rest is in order.  I would have a hard time finding a job that would give me my vacation time (5 weeks plus 3 personal days and 6 sick days) and my pay.  It's just a down place to work lately but I'm looking forward to a few days off.  I took Wed off to prepare for turkey day and then we have the day after off.  Skye, sorry to hear of your continued pain - at least now it has a name.  Do we qualify for an honorary m.d. after all of this?  Nancy thinking of you as my bc anniversary is the same time.  It's been quite a year for all of us but we DID IT!  Rebecca, hope your meds are helping. 

I've had quite a few yeast infections in the last month.  Does anyone know - does this come with menopause or Tamox?  I work out a lot and in the winter I am prone to these.  I was thinking of going to my husband's nutritionist to see if there is anything natural I can take to prevent this but then I'd have to go back to my onc to check that all out so I am procrastinating but these are very annoying.

((hugs)) to all.

meliaanne

Joni, I hope you are feeling better. Maybe you can reschedule the trip for the spring?  And Skye, I am sorry you are still achey, but it must be a huge relief to know it isn't bc related.  Every ache sends my mind to bad places, as I am sure it does for all of us. Jan, welcome home. I know how much of a whirlwind those business trips are, and how sharp you have to be every second. How did the one breast thing go with your friend?  The one thing I make sure of when I travel for business is my own room, and room service. I find all the intense interaction to be exhausting, always have, can't blame that on bc!

Mary, I am sorry what sounded like such a supportive environment at work while you were undergoing treatment has turned so unpleasant. I know what you mean about replicating benefits, pay, etc when you have been in one job for such a long time. Is it just the new hours, or is the atmosphere different too?

I am sort of nervous about going into work today too. Thanksgiving shipping wasn't too successful and my boss is going to have lots of hard questions. Some of it is my fault, some not, so all I can do is give him a summary and let him vent.He is quite a gentleman, so his anger takes the form of a verrrrry red face but no shouting. Quiet, sharp, on the mark statements. Problem is his son is the general manager, and he covered my desk while I was on my trip, and he made some huge, but understandable, errors. Partially due to my poor communication before I left. Oh well, it isn't bc, right?

Looking forward to the kids arriving tomorrow night, staying til Sunday morning. It will be a full, noisy house, which I enjoy. I also enjoy the quiet when they leave! Our tradition is to get the xmas tree the day after TG, since my husband is such a grinch at xmas and if I didn't do it with the kids, I would have to go alone, which isn't much fun. So we will get the tree and decorate it. Last year I slept in the recliner in the living room with the tree lights on as I recovered from surgery, so I think this will be a bit surreal.

Have a good day all.

Melia

Lynn12

Good morning ladies,

Rebecca, good for you for asking for the Effexor.  I'm so glad you Doc prescribed it for you.  Sometimes we get ourselves into a place and it's so hard to get out.  I hope you are feeling better!

Melia, good luck at work today.  I'm sure your boss realizes it's not all your fault.  Work on the positive by telling how you'd do it different next time.

Cindy, that is a lovely quote!   How are you feeling?

Viddie, thanks for the inside scoop on the experience.  I lost all modesty when I was giving birth to Shelley.  I was sweating and in so much pain that I kept kicking the covers off me with the door wide open to the hall.  So it looks like I really don't need much. I do have some of those really warm soft socks which I'll bring and a few of the gossipy magazines (people).  As for visitors, the only plans (other than dh) I know of is my family driving out to visit me on Wednesday.  So if you're up to it, I'd love to see you again, maybe Thursday? Will I need to bring underwear? Will I even be wearing any considering the abdominal surgery?

Joni, so sorry you didn't make your trip to Spokane.  I hope you are feeling better. It's not fun to be sick away from home, you made the right choice.  That XMAS exchange sounds like a blast! 

Mary, yeast infections are the pits!  I haven't had one in years, but I used to get them alot in my 20s.  I don't have any answers for you, but sending you big hugs!

Jan, welcome back, we missed you!

Skye, what a relief to have an actual name and it doesn't contain the word cancer.  Hope you feel better soon.

As Thanksgiving approaches, I've been really thinking about how thankful I am to my family (dh, sister, mom and 3 kids) for seeing me through the past year.  Since we will all be together on Thursday, I decided I wanted to do something for them.  So I ordered co-surviror pins for them.  I got 4 different kinds online.  The pins have both pink and white on them, the pink representing me as a survivor and the white representing them as co-survivors who were a source of support and inspiration for me through-out my journey.  I wrote them each a personal note as well and will give it to them at my house before we go out to dinner.  I don't expect them to actually wear the ribbons but wanted them to have something that symbolizes the bonds we share together.

Have a nice day!

IowaCindy

Hi, all.

I am doing well. Recovery seems so much easier this time around since I don't have the terrible anesthesia hangover that I experienced last year. Can I just say:  Damn those drains!  and Bless those drains for what they do!  It's really a catch-22, isn't it? OWWW!!! I've got them pinned really high on the chest binder so I don't accidentally pull on them when I'm going to the bathroom but I have a couple of times.YIkes, that's a moment that my mouth ignores the guards I usually have in place and things will just spout out.

I tire easily. I'm up for about 4 hours and then ready for a nap. Today I'm going to try to stay nap-free. Maybe I'll sleep better. 

I can so sympathize with the chemo-brain concerns. My daughter has had me playing word games to get myself back to normal. I used to eb the family queen of word games. Not anymore.  It discourages me but I keep at it. 

I do well at work if things follow the flow, go with the routine but when the unusual crops I have to ask for clarification, I can't quite make decisions by myself yet. 

Hey, 1lovewolf - we are almost into our first year together as a chemo group. You're welcome to come for advice and for the witty company but you probably want to find the Jan '08 group to join so you can grow a group like this. 

This holiday is difficult. My eldest is going through a divorce. My SIL has turned wicked. I just watch and love her, knowing from first hand some of what she's going through. Poor Amy, she's tried to protect me from what's happening, worried about me and gone through this without the maximum mom support. I'm so thankful that my former husband is being absolutely wonderful for her. I guess as long as she has one of her parents to lean on she'll be okay. I'm trying to butt in as much as I can but she's being very protective.

Rebecca, I hope the Effexor works for you. When I had my pre-op physical, the GP told me he thought it was helping my mood.  The girls tell me that I haven't displayed any of the dreaded menopausal mood swings. I'm just glad that it really has minimized my hot flashes. Although I do find that if I"m not in panties and a tank top I get too hot to sleep at night.

Nancy, we'll keep your pets in mind as you travel. Have a lovely time. 

I'm off to clean the dining room. I have to change the table linens. The cocker spaniel has decided that the table is a nice place to sit and watch the household activities! What a crazy little dog!  

Happy Tuesday to everyone!!!!!!!!!!!

Cindy 

skyedivine

Hi gals,

Melia I hope you get thru that touchy office situation ok. Few things in the world go perfectly, they must understand that.

Lynn our thoughts are with you as you prep for surgery.

I also remember recuperating last December with the Christmas tree lights in the living room. It was a big comfort to me.

Cindy that's funny about your cocker on the table. And glad the recuperation is still going well. I feel for your poor DS, so hard to watch kids go through that sort of thing.

I had a good trip to Madison and 45 minutes on state public radio then lunch with an old friend who had bc five years ago, a 5.2 cm ER+ tumor and she never had chemo, just rads, and is doing great. She has been on tamo for five years. And she brought me a jar of homemade fudge topping. Yum. It was a grueling drive home however with big bad accident on the Interstate, and I stopped to do some shopping too. I felt pulverized by the time I got home so did not get off the couch even for chat. And tomorrow is Herceptin. At least I'll get an hour and a half in the chair with nothing to do. :-) Skye

Rebecca

Well, it is day three on the effexor and I am about ready to vibrate out of my shoes!  Yikes, Tina you were not kidding…a little “racey”?  I really hope that this effect wears off because it is very unpleasant.  I feel like I drank about 5 cups of coffee!  The hyperactive feeling is bringing out my anxiety, which has no focus whatsoever, so it just results in me being very restless.  On the plus side, my problem getting up in the AM seems to have vanished LOL. 

Off to class…I am sure I will be back to babble later.  Love you all

 

 

TPPJ

Rebecca, it went away for me in under a week (probably like four days of taking it.)

Cindy, that stinks that you have to watch your daughter go through that.  I can imagine feeling irate at someone hurting your child like that.

I have to remember to buy those sports bras that snap in front.  I don't think I kept them from last year.  Need to check.  Reading your comments about drains, brings it all back...  like if, God forbid, one fell to the floor in the shower...that tugging sensation on your skin...how it would burn.  I thought it'd fall out.  Boy, was I surprised when I DID have them removed and realized there was a good foot of tubing still inside me!  ICK.  I wonder if I'll have drains this time.  I bet.  And my PS doesn't yank them until the output is under 20 cc's.  I had them in for three weeks last year.  HATED it.  I have some social engagements the week after surgery too...  I wonder if I'll be up to dealing w/it if I have drains.  Hard to dress decently w/those things.  Fortunately, these aren't must attend events.  Only one is, on Dec. 11...  the DH got Jaclyn tix to Hannah Montana and I have to take her.  I feel like taking a taxi so I don't have to walk across the huge parking lot at the arena...  I'd have the DH drive us but traffic will be a nightmare down there.

Lynn12

Tina, what date is your surgery?  And I'm trying to remember what you are having, hysterectomy and mastectomy?  What is the recovery supposed to be like for you?

My PS said I'll have 4 drains...not looking forward to that at all.  I was lucky after my mastectomy last year I only had 1 drain and it came out 4 days later.

viddie

Hi all,

Jan,

Welcome back. We missed you.

Skye,

“How come my regular onc never thought of this, and made me suffer untold mental agony thinking I had bone mets or necrosis for two months, when the fibromyalgia was there in my profile for him to see all along?”

Good question- once again it proves we have to be our own advocates. Great research, Skye. I only wish there was a better solution for you.

That brunch sounded yummy. How much CoQ10 do you take daily. I just bought 100mg tablets.

I decided to add some extra vitamins to my pill box. Might as well have those boxes full. LOL



I also bought some magnesium pills. Does anyone take magnesium with their calcium and Vitamin D? If so, how much?

Joni,

I hope you are feeling better.

Cindy,

Thanks for such an insightful quote. I am glad you are feeling better. I hear you on the pulling of the drains. When are they coming out?

Rebecca,

I am glad you were able to get the Effexor. I hope the jumpy effect goes away real soon.

Nancy,

Have a great time.

Lynn,

I do not think I wore underwear. I think it would have been uncomfortable over the abdominal incision. Wait a minute- I did not wear underwear. I will put Thursday on my calendar. If I can bring anything, please let me know.

Did you order the Marsupial Pouch? It was very helpful. All my drains came out the following Fiday-11 days later.



I had my genetic counseling on Monday and she said that given my family history and my medical history, I only had a 1 1/2 chance of having the BRCA gene. What a relief. Since my chances were so low, I decided not to have the test for now. She also would not recommend me having my ovaries removed just based on my being Ashkenazi. She was upset that my onc suggested it without knowing all the facts first. That’s all good news. Yesterday was my cancerversary. This Thanksgiving will indeed be a greatful one for all of us. We made it!!!

Off to shopping.

Have a great day everyone.

Viddie

jonimb

Hi everyone,

Feeling better, but I finally had to take Thor to the Vet yesterday.  He hasn't been well since we got home from vacation, so yesterday he had blood work, x-rays (abdomen), and a thorough check up. Should have all the results back by tomorrow.  I used to make all his food, but prior to going on holidays we put him back on a Vet approved food, so at the kennel he wouldn't be sick.  Well I guess his tummy doesn't like anything but Mummy's cooking because the Vet thinks its his food.  We are now in the process of switching again.  If that doesn't work, I'm going back to making his food, because my poor little guy has to feel better soon.

Made 3 dozen gingerbread men this morning, and decorated them all.  I'm  taking some baking over to a nursing home (my Mum used to be there).  This afternoon I'm making chocolate chip/macadamia nut cookies.  Enjoying baking, in my previous life (before BC), I never had enough time to do it.

Tina, I think you said your surgery was November 30, and Lynn is yours Dec 12?  I'll be thinking of you both, with warm healing thoughts.

Well better sign off for today...hugs to all....Joni

skyedivine

Hi Ladies,

Back from a Herceptin shoot-up, I'm not counting them just counting the months to April. I've been waking up often at night and I think I looked dreadful this morning as the nurse was asking a lot of questions and finally they wrote me a scrip for Ambien which I will start tonight. If it works I will be very happy as now I stay in bed eight hours but never feel rested enough. I'm having my thyroid checked next week too just in case.



Joni I hope poor Thor is better. What do you use to make his dog food?



Tina and Lynn you are in all our thoughts I'm sure, and hoping those surgeries go perfectly.

Tina I've heard those H.M. tickets are terribly difficult to get so your DH pulled a miracle. Little Jaclyn is a lucky girl. I'm pretty out of the loop on H.M., wouldn't know her music if I heard it but she looks more wholesome than most teen role models.



Viddie you did get some great news! If you don't need surgery that's always a good thing, and also that you have such a low chance of having that gene.



Rebecca I'm glad the Effexor is taking effect, even if it's making you "vibey" for now. I could use a little extra energy to get through the holiday season.



The gal I met in my chemo room who had the blood clot three weeks ago was there again today, and she still has the clot so they are taking out her port. She broke down in tears talking to me because she has a 15-year old son who is often too sick to go to school and she is also the only one of her siblings in town to look after her elderly mother, and here she is getting chemo to get her tumor reduced enough for surgery and dealing with a huge blood clot, and no one to help her except her husband who works. She also has a 6 and a 10 year old. I don't even know what I can do for her; but I told her she has to take care of herself first in order to be there for them. Her dh is taking the kids and her mother to a relative's house tomorrow so she can have a day to herself.



We are supposed to get 3 inches of snow here overnight so it will be a white Thanksgiving. Must make some apple pies and a massive sweet potato casserole to take to my brother's house. Happy Thanksgiving to everyone, even to my Canadian bc sisters because I'm thankful for you, as well. - Skye

Caya

Happy Thanksgiving to all the American BC sisters - I wish you all a lovely day feasting and visiting with your families.

I'm feeling a bit down today.  It has been an exhausting week with my MIL in the hospital - they have finally determined that her incision on her bowel from the surgery has reopened and has to reclot to heal.  They don't want to open up her again ( a last resort) because if it isn't bleeding that minute, they won't be able to repair it without seeing exactly where the bleed is.  OY!! Very draining on all of us - especially my MIL.  It's very sad to see her like this.

They're calling for a big storm here too tomorrow - and naturally I have to shlep downtown for my Herceptin infusion. I will probably call a cab to take me to the subway and then subway downtown.  No way I'll drive in that stuff if I can avoid it.

Joni - I love gingerbread men. Sound like your XMAS celebrations will be great.

Skye - I hope you're not too tired this weekend after your Herceptin today. I'm sure your family will enjoy the apple pie and sweet potato casserole.  Very sad story about the lady in the chemo room with the blood clot and so many responsiblities.  Maybe she could get some help from her church group? 

Viddie - great news about your genetic testing.  You do have alot to be thankful for this year.

Cindy - glad you are doing well. Sorry about the aggravation with your daughter, but I'm sure she is grateful for your support.

Rebecca - Hang in there with the Effexor.  I've been on it a week, I can feel the difference.

Melia - I hope the work situation was resolved in a nice way.  From what you have posted before it sounds like your bosses give you a lot of responsibility - also difficult when the son is involved.

Have a great weekend everyone, enjoy those turkeys.

IowaCindy

I've had a lovely day in the snow. We were only supposed to get a few flurries but it snowed for several hours. It was big, fluffy stuff that really only accumulated on the grass and parked cars but it was enough to cause several bad accidents in the metro area. People are just sutpid during the first snow of the season.

My younger daughter Abby continued her escorting ways and we saw the surgeon today. I've one less drain. The armpit drain remains until next Tuesday - it has just a little too much coming through yet for her to be comfortable pulling it.

And the best news: my pathology is clear! No sign of disease. Woohoo!

She is very pleased with my surgical recovery and long term outlook. I am very pleased with her! She's wonderful. Even if she'd given me bad news, I'd be thankful for her care.

Now it's time to finish some chores around the house. I had Abby vacuum for me before she left but I've a little dusting to do and general tidying up to complete.

It's amazing how light I feel. I truly didn't have moments of anxiety about the pathology. I've been very comfortable while I've recovered. I've been at peace with the 'what ifs'.  But actually getting that word of 'all clear' has just given me a lift that I've been floating about the house now since we got home. 

I was thankful before today but will surely be even more so tomorrow.

Happy day to everyone!

Cindy..........still getting acclimated to my flat chest and having flashbacks to being 7 years old, it's definitely not a bad thing at all but I do have to work on my stomach! 

Anonymous

I've been reading posts for days without responding. So here it goes. My apologies ahead of time for what will be a long post!

Well the one boob issue was OK at the conference. I wore a robe and didn't feel comfortable. But I don't know what I could have done to make myself feel any better about it. When we made the hotel arrangements months ago I had thought at the time that my reconstruction would be done by now. At any rate, I'm sure my friend didn't care. Separate rooms would have been nice, but since it's our company and we have a tiny budget it was worth it to share.

After being out of the office for a week I am way too far behind with the rest of my work. I'll have some catching up to do over the holiday weekend.
A thought for all of you dealing with (or about to deal with) drains - - find a lanyard to wear around your neck in the shower. You can clip or pin the drains to the lanyard in the shower so you don't have to worry about them dropping or getting in the way. We always have lanyards floating around the house from past conferences and seminars where they are used to hold name tags. I used them last year and they were perfect.

Cindy - I am so happy for you. There is nothing like the elation that follows a clean path report. Enjoy it. I am truly amazed at how well you are handling your new body and recover. I am still angry and grumpy about the whole thing and it's been almost a year. You are an inspiration for sure!

Caya - I am sending good thoughts to your MIL. I hope things get better soon. I'll also be hoping that the storm blows over quickly.

Skye - sweet potato casserole is one of my favorite foods! I hope the Ambien works. You can't function without proper rest. It's essential. Like food and water.

Rebecca - I hope the Effexor smoothes out soon for you and works as you hope it will.

Tina - wow your DH should get Dad of the Year for scoring Hannah Montana tickets. I don't know anyone who managed to get them. I'm counting my blessings that my DDs haven't gotten really into that yet.

Joni - Let us know how Thor does with the food switch. I hope he is OK!
Viddie - It sounds like the time spent in genetic counseling was worthwhile. I am glad it brought you some reassurance.

So much talk of snow! It was 74 here today. We are expecting rain today, which we would truly be thankful for as the drought continues to become more serious by the day.

I need to find a way to make a mental adjustment going into the holiday season. The whole one year anniversary thing is enough. I am still disappointed (ok, bitter) that I passed the one year point without reconstruction. Anyway, dealing with my MIL and FIL is more than I can handle right now. They are well intentioned but also over-the-top in the turtle face department. I absolutely dread having to spend an entire day with them this weekend.

I know I'm chiming in a bit late on the chemo brain conversation, but if anyone has suggestions for games, etc. to build some mental function I would LOVE to hear about it. I feel like I am losing brain cells by the day.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone.

Rebecca

Ahhhh Cindy....news worthy of thanks!  How timely.  keep floating lovely woman....

We are getting ready to head out for a long thanksgiving weekend.  We will be joining my Uncle and Aunt out in Pennsylvania for an enormous feast with my Aunt's former in laws (we call them the outlaws).  It is going to be a huge gathering, taking place in an old inn that my Aunt's Sister-OutLaw bought to renovate.  It is not open to the public yet, so it is looking like a fabulous place to go...tucked away in rural Pennsylvania.  Then we will be heading back to the farm for the balance of the weekend.  I am so looking forward to this....I think the outing will do us all good.  I may be able to check in over the weekend, but if I do not, everyone enjoy!  Happy thanksgiving to all my sisters, for whom I am extremely grateful.

TPPJ

The Outlaws...LOL.  Have fun!

Jan, do not be fooled.  The DH paid dearly for this Hannah tix...the week before he lost his job.  Whatever.  I don't even care.  He's spent mucho dolares in years past taking my son to Wrestlemania.  Thank God they are off that kick.

Cindy, so glad you are doing so well and Jan, glad your conference was good and you are back w/us.

Caya, I hope the MIL's sitch gets resolved.  That's a tough one.

Lynn, I'm Nov. 30.  Are you 12/12?  For some reason that date sticks in my head.  I'm having a full hyst. (ovaries, tubes, uterus and cervis) plus a lift on my natural breast and nipple reconstruction on my fake one.  Should be fun. 

Happy Thanksgiving Girls!  Our first one together!  XOXO  Wouldn't have known what to do without you all.  Honestly.  You have made all the difference in my life.  I feel closer to you than some friends I've known a lifetime!

meliaanne

Good Morning all,

I couldn't let Thanksgiving go by without thanking all of you. It is so strange that this is the one safe place in my life this past year. My husband did his best, but he was scared too. The kids did not need to parent me, so I was strong around them. Here I felt I could weep, vent, wail, and you would all hold  me above water. I am so grateful. Thank you all so much.

Jan, I hear that you are in pain over all this, and I don't blame you a bit. You are a young mom, you should not have to deal with cancer and fighting for the reconstruction that you want. And I am sorry you have to spend a day with people who don't make you feel any better.

Cindy, I am delighted that your path report was good and that you are feeling well. And very sorry that your daughter is having such a rocky time.

Skye, such a sad story about the lady in the infusion center. So much on her plate.  I hope your sleep is improving. Life is so much brighter after a good night's sleep, but that is so hard to achieve.

Joni, how are you feeling? And poor Thor, how is he?

Rebecca, I hope you have an excellent weekend, and that the change of pace helps, along with the effexor.

Caya, I am praying for your mil. What an ordeal. I worry about these older folks having surgery.

Lynn and Tina, holding good strong thoughts for you as your surgeries approach.

Our older daughter, her husband, our son and his gf are here for the four day holiday weekend. So nice to have a houseful, fun to listen to them. Today we potluck with extended fam, first time they will see me without the wig. I am loving my short, thick, curly hair, though I can't do much with it. Next step is going to work without it.

It's a year today since I had the biopsy and the radiologist said it was "highly indicative of cancer."  The next month is full of anniversaries. Bad ones. But we are all still here, still kicking. And again, I could NOT have done it without all of you.

Hugs, Melia

meliaanne

I hope you all stay safe in your travels, esp those of you with snow!

Lynn12

Good morning my sisters!

Wishing you all a happy Thanksgiving! I'm so very thankful to have you all in my life!  I love you all!

viddie

Hi all,

Joni,

I hope Thor is feeling better.

Cindy,

Congratulations on your clear pathology report. That is such great news. Now you will have a great Thanksgiving.

Caya,

I am sending positive thoughts to your MIL.

Tina,

Your PS and gynocologist will work together in the same surgery? That’s great. Those Hannah tickets sound very special. Jaclyn will live it.

Rebecca,

Have a great time in Pa.

Skye,

That sweet potato pie sounds delicious. Have a great time.

Jan,

I hear you on the “Outlaws.” I have a few of them. Someone once told me to try to find some humor in them.

Easier said than done. You already started to by renaming them. Good luck.

I know it is frustrating waiting for your reconstruction. My stage 2 is not until May and until then I am a little lopsided and a little wrinkly, from my past open incisions. All will be smoothed out and fixed at Stage two, but waiting is hard. I still do not wear a bra, but I cannot wear anything tight yet. lol. Can’t wait.

Melia,

Have a great weekend with your family. I am also going topless for the first time with my extended family.

Lynn,

I love your greetings. You have to show me how to do that someday.



We are going to my cousin’s for Thanksgiving. My dd is flying in right now and will stay with us until Sunday. Our son will also be able to join us. We are celebrating Chanukah today and sharing gifts also because today is the only day we all will be together before Christmas.

This has been quite a year for all of us, and we made it. I am so grateful that the worst is over, yet I am still under shock that this year,-diagnosis, chemo, hair loss, surgeries-actually happened.

I am most thankful for my best friends sisters I met here. Without you all, I do not think I would have my sanity. Thank you for always being there.

Have a Happy Thanksgiving.

For our Canada sisters,

Have a great Day.



Love,

Viddie (Paula)

mer1957

As I await my Tksgvng company, I thank God for all of you.  What a support you have been this year for me and for each other.  This is really was community is all about.  I have so much to be thankful for this year.  I have really found out what I was made of.  I don't know what the future holds and that is scary at times, but I move ahead in faith, that all will work out in the end to what is meant to be.  - Meanwhile I'm having a glass of wine!  - Happy Thanksgiving!  My thoughts and prayers are with you - whatever you are going through or dealing with.  Love, mer

luckymel

Happy Thanksgiving, my dear sisters. First of all, let me say how much I love and appreciate you all. In your own unique and incredibly wonderful ways, each of you is so special - you all bring something different and essential to this community of friends, and I am amazed on a daily basis at the wisdom and support I find here. I thank you all for being who you are, and for allowing me to be a part of this very special group. I don't know how the past year would have been without your support, but I can honestly say that my life is much richer for having known you all, and if breast cancer is the way it had to happen, then I am ok with that. Thank you all so much, and Happy Thanksgiving to all. I am very thankful for all of you.

Like Jan, I have been reading for days without posting. Unlike Jan, I really don't have a good reason. I want to post, but I either can't find the time to sit down and do it, or I make the time and can't find the words. It isn't just here - I find that my e-mail life is in a shambles, I have been unable to return phone calls in a timely manner...you get the idea. I guess it has something to do with going back to work, probably, but I haven't been working that much. I just seem to have lost control of everything. I'm hoping to get caught up this weekend, and start next week with a clean slate. I really have been scattered - I've been cleaning out my closet, cleaning out the pantry and all the kitchen cupboards, Christmas shopping,and several other projects, but nothing is done and I keep frantically rushing from one unfinished task to another. I can't seem to concentrate on anything, but my mind is racing and I can't relax. I think that I may be trying to do everything that I thought about doing while I was in treatment and didn't have the strength to do anything. Now I'm back at work already, none of those things are done, and I am in a panic. I don't know, really, what it is, but that seems logical. This is all a long way of saying I'm sorry. I'm still here, I think of every one of you every single day, and even if you don't see my words, I am sending good thoughts to you all, and reading every word that is written.

We seriously considered going to my mom's for Thanksgiving - DH would have gone if I had insisted, although it isn't a good time of year to travel. Getting in and out of Houston on a holiday weekend is really stressful - we've done it a couple times, and always said "never again." He drove to Montgomery, AL on Monday (10 hours) and back on Tuesday, to attend our daugher-in-law's graduation from the Air Force officer school - not sure what it's called. I stayed home to work and walk Harrison. Anyway, after two solid days of driving, I didn't feel like he needed another car trip so soon, so we stayed home. We will go back to my mom's sometime between now and Christmas. So, we stayed home and his mom and step-dad came over for dinner. I really hadn't planned anything, so it was all kind of last minute, but turned out well and we had a good time. I was very good, ate small portions and no second helpings, and was not overstuffed like I usually am...then I ate two pieces of dutch apple pie and blew it! Oh well, once or twice a year won't hurt me, I guess, and I must say I enjoyed it immensely.

Work has been going ok, although I'm still trying to get back into it. I've forgotten a lot of things, and I still feel like I'm losing brain cells on a daily basis. I expected to feel better by now, but still getting worse. Anyway, starting next week, I'm working three days a week, then after Christmas I guess I'll go back to four days (unless I can figure out a way not to, that is). I really think three days might be about my limit, now.

Hair-wise, I am still wearing my wig to work, and most everywhere else, too. My hair is curly-kinky, very gray, and I haven't a clue what to do with it. I think the gray really ages me. It is getting long enough that it's affecting the fit of the wig, now, so unless I want to shave it off again I have to do something, so I made an appointment with my hairdresser for a consultation on Wednesday. Maybe a little color will make me more comfortable.

Enough for one post, huh? I'll post this and then respond to some of your posts later on this evening. Just wanted you all to know that I'm still here, and I love you all. Hugs all around.

luckymel

I'm back. I know, too many words already - my fault for waiting so long between posts. Joni, I hope Thor is back to normal by now. What do you do for his food? I make brown rice, chicken, and carrots or other vegetables for Harrison, but I'm not confident that it's adequate so I feed it half and half with regular dog food (canned ultra healthy) and a bit of dry food which he usually manages to pick out and leave in the bowl. So, just curious. Harrison got a whiff of the chicken and rice my sister feeds her dogs, and from that day on, he HAD to have that - so of course he got it. Your baking sounds like so much fun - I love to bake cookies and such. The problem is, I like to eat them, too, so I can't do it as much as I like.

Speaking of Harrison, Jan, do you (or anyone else) have any ideas about what I can do to make Harrison walk with me better? He likes to choose the direction, and if he doesn't get his way he lags behind, head down, or even stops totally sometimes, so I have to drag him along. It's a big dramatic thing. I understand that he's trying to assert himself and that he needs to know who is top dog...but I also know that he's 10 years old and has possibly been mistreated, so I don't want to add to his issues. I have a martingale collar (and also a harness, which I haven't tried), but the collar doesn't help much. The problem isn't with him pulling ahead, but of lagging behind. A gentle leader maybe? Private obedience lessons? Another session with the pet psychic?

Tina, didn't realize your surgery was coming up so fast - I'm sure you'll do well, and glad you can get it all done in one fell swoop. It may not be much fun, but it wouldn't be much better if you only had half of it done, and you'd have to do it twice. You're strong - I know you'll be fine, and presumably your dh can help out with kids and such, right? Lynn, yours will be done before you know it, too, then it will be Jan's turn. I'll be bringing up the rear, instead of being the first one like I thought! My diep doc's still telling me April.

Rebecca, I had no doubt they'd give you the Effexor, and I hope by now your body has adjusted some and you're not feeling so jittery. Your weekend in the country sounds perfect - I hope the weather is nice and you all have a wonderful time (and I hope you have your camera with you - your pictures always make my heart glad).

Jan, I hope you can give yourself a little bit of time off over the weekend. You can't work all the time! and I'm so sorry that you're still angry and bitter about the whole bc issue. I totally understand - a someone said, you are much too young to have to be dealing with this, you and Rebecca both. Well, hell, we're all too young for this crap, but it seems so much more unjust for you younger ones. So, I don't blame you at all for having trouble getting past this, but I hope your reconstruction makes it easier to deal with. Meanwhile, we are all here, and we love you.

Cindy, I'm thrilled that your path report was clean - what wonderful news! Hope you're relaxing in comfort in your "new" living room and will soon see the last of the drains. I saw pics on the news today of the snow and the traffic mishaps resulting from it, and hoped you weren't out in that. I've been plenty of snow storms, both in Kansas and when I lived in Iowa...don't miss the driving, but otherwise I do miss my cold weather. It did get down to the 40's here today - such a relief after such a warm fall.

Caya, hoping for the best for your MIL - I hate that she has to go through all that. And I know it's hard on you, too. Any news on the internship yet?

Skye, have you been back to see Grendel yet? He is really the most gorgeous little puppy. Did you get your three inches of snow? Hope you had a great turkey day at your brother's. I wish we could do something to help the poor lady in your chemo room with all the issues - but maybe you could tell her we're all thinking about her and are concerned, anyway. It might make her feel better, even if it doesn't help anything else. Hope your Ambien helps you. I couldn't get along without mine. Time for sleep is hard to come by anyway - I can't afford to waste any of it not being able to sleep.

Viddie, glad your genetic counseling news was favorable, so you can relax about that. By the way, I do take magnesium along with my calcium and vit. d. I believe it is 250 mg.

Lynn, I think what you did for your family members (the co-survivor pins, etc.) is so thoughtful and sweet - and so YOU. I'm sure they will treasure the notes and pins.

Nancy, hope you made it to Atlanta with your bag of goodies from Ohio, and I will be sending good thoughts out that your pets are being well cared for. Hope your mood has stabilized, too.

Melia, I'm sure you're having a wonderful weekend with a house full of kids. How did it go going wigless with the family?

Sharon, haven't heard from you for a while - hope you're well and enjoying life. How did it go getting your port out?

Mary, I hope your work situation will improve. I really feel for you. Congratulations on getting through one full year since diagnosis - and I hope your friend gets good news from her biopsy. If not, she will have a good support person in you.

Robbin, Mizzy, hope life is good for both of you. Anyone else I've forgotten, I'm sorry. Love to you all. I now declare myself caught up, and will try to do better.

Caya

Mel,

Glad you're back - we missed you!!

Now word yet on the internship for Cassie, but I doubt she got it, I think we would have heard by now.

xo Caya