Things to do in an elevator

SEI

I ran across this the other day...oldie, but it still cracks me up everytime I read it.

Fun things to do on an elevator:

1 - Make race car noises when anyone gets on or off.

2 - Blow your nose and offer to show the contents of your kleenex to
other passengers.

3 - Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering:
"Shut up, all of you just shut UP!"

4 - Whistle the first seven notes of "Its a Small World" incessantly.

5 - Sell Girl Scout cookies.

6 - On a long ride, sway side to side at the natural frequency of
the elevator.

7 - Shave.

8 - Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside
ask: "Got enough air in there?"

9 - Offer name tags to everyone getting on the elevator. Wear yours
upside-down.

10 - Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall,
without getting off.

11 - When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors
open, then act embarrassed when they open by themselves.

12 - Lean over to another passenger and whisper, "Noogie patrol
coming."

13 - Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm handshake
and ask them to call you Admiral.

14 - One word: Flatulence!

15 - On the highest floor, hold the door open and demand that it
stay open until you hear the penny you dropped down the shaft go
"plink" at the bottom.

16 - Do Tai Chi excercises.

17 - Stare, grinning, at another passenger for a while and then
announce, "I've got new socks on."

18 - When at least 8 people have boarded, moan from the back: "Oh
no, not now, motion sickness!"

19 - Meow occassionally.

20 - Bet the other passengers you can fit a quarter in your nose.

21 - Frown and mutter, "gotta go, gotta go" then sigh and say "oops!"

22 - Show other passengers a wound and ask if it looks infected.

23 - Sing "Mary had a little lamb" whle continually pushing buttons.

24 - Holler "Chutes away!" whenever the elevator descends.

25 - Walk on with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.

26 - Stare at another passenger for a while then announce, "You're one
of THEM!" and then move to the far corner of the elevator.

27 - Burp and then say, "Mmmm....tasty."

28 - Leave a box between the doors.

29 - Ask each passenger getting on if you can push the button for
them.

30 - Wear a puppet on your hand and talk to other passengers "through"
it.

31 - Start a sing-along.

32 - When the elevator is silent look around and ask, "is that your
beeper?"

33 - Play the harmonica.

34 - Shadow box.

35 - Say "Ding!" at each floor.

36 - Lean against the button panel.

37 - Say "I wonder what all these do" and push all the red buttons.

38 - Listen to the elevator walls with a stethescope.

39 - Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the
other passengers that this is your "personal space."

40 - Bring a chair along.

41 - Take a bite of a sandwich and ask another passenger, "Wanna see
wha in muh mouf?"

42 - Blow spit bubbles.

43 - Pull your gum out of your mouth in long strings.

44 - Announce in a demonic voice: "I must find a more suitable host
body."

45 - Carry a blanket and clutch it protectively.

46 - Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.

47 - Wear "X-Ray" glasses and leer suggestively at other passengers.

48 - Stare at your thumb and say "I think its getting larger."

49 - If anyone brushes against you, recoil and holler, "Bad touch!"