anyone starting chemo in Nov 2005

Odalys

ML, Looks like your hair is coming in evenly. Great.

Margerie

ML, love the hair! Mine is about the same length. I call it the nympth look. My hubby loves it.

Mine came in half gray. That was a surprise. I wonder- my first eyebows and lashes were gray also, but have been replaced by "regulars". I will be investing in some hair dye. But it is so noce to go au natural.

Odalys,

Glad you are done w/rads. I hope you are not like me. I conitnued to cook for a few weeks afterward and it got ugly.
My last rad was 3/31 and it is still red and warm. But maybe you have better skin than me!

Hope everyone has a great holiday weekend. We are camping at the lake. My first time camping (growing up camping was staying at the lodge in the national parks) and I am a little nervous. We'll see how it goes!

Odalys

Margerie,
The skin is cooked and the breast is very tender. Last night I could barely sleep because it felt like the entire breast was on fire! Ouch...doctor said it will continue to cook for about another two weeks. I just hope it does not blister. I am putting Biafene (sp?) cream to help with the itching. I am glad to be done.

Have a great time camping. Hope it is not too hot and there are not too many mosquitos at the lake. Enjoy, you have earned it.

Wishing everyone a fun Memorial Day Weekend!

Mary-Lou

Hi all, thanks for the hair complements. Wig and fuzz. Michael pets me all the time. LOL I had # 20 rads today. I think I said yesterday it was #18. I lost a day somewhere.

Tonight I'm bright red! Wow, I don't think I'll make it 13 more treatments with out some pain. Looks like it will blister. Everything is looking good but the upper chest where nodes are being treated. I have 3 fields in all. That one gets the long treatment.

I didn't know it kept on cooking. Bummer But I can handle it. I've gotten this far.

Debby- I'm still at the same weight. I need to get my act together.

Enjoy the camping, you will love it Margerie.

Everyone have a great week-end. I have no rads till Tuesday!!!!! WhooHoooo!

ML

kim825

Odalys, congrats on finishing rads. That is such wonderful news. I am red, but it is not all from rads. This is going to get really red, we will see. I am nervous because the kids have 2 more weeks of school and I can't take them to the public pool. That is where we were all summer last year. I am trying to convince Anthony that we NEED a pool in the yard for the kids. I just don't want rads messing their whole summer.
ML our hair looks similar. Anthony loves to pet it also. It is mostly gray w/some black.

HOpe everyone has a great weekend.

Kim

Odalys

Kim, does the public pool have a shady area where you can hang out while the kids swim? Maybe you can take an umbrella? We have a backyard pool and I've gone swimming with Steven and his friend twice while on rads. It has felt really good on the burned skin. Once I stayed on the shady area and the other time I went in late afternoon when there was no sun. We just love and absolutely enjoy our backyard pool every year. We even put in a pool heater this year so we can enjoy the pool all year round.

Rads has really cooked my skin but there is no pain, just tenderness. I prefer this over chemo any day.

Take care and many hugs.

Anonymous

Hi ladies! I met with the surgeon yesterday and she kind of hinted at how it might be a good idea for me to have both breasts removed. I don't remember exactly what she said, but essentially she said it was a better protective measure for me, since I am only 31. I know you have all said what you've had done, but can you all remind me if you had lumpectomy, one or both breasts removed? Also, please tell me your thoughts on the subject. I can't decide. I had been pretty comfortable with having one boob removed, so now I am all confused again.
I hope everyone is feeling great-
Love and prayers, Debbie

Margerie

Debbie,

I had a mastectomy on the left side. I am having bilateral reconstruction done in Septmeber. Had to wait 6 months because I had radiation.

I decided to have the right side done also. It's just not worth it to me to keep it. I was 38 at dx and have 1-2% chance per year of a second primary tumor. Anyway, long story short, I did not want the stress of lumps (fibrocystic breasts, dense) mammos, biopsies or GASP missing another tumor like my original cancer was. I am having a flap reconstruction and the right side will be immediate. If you can have a skin sparing mastectomy (immediate reconstruction), only the nipple area is incised to remove the breast tissue. The results look great!

Anyway, there are pros and cons for the prophy mast. Big cons are some LE risk, loss of sensation, longer surgery and recovery. Pros for me: less worry, both breasts will match now (well better than reconstructed breast and slightly saggy natural breast), nipples will match.

Good luck in your decision. I am looking forward to my new girls!

Odalys

Hey Deb,
It's a tough decision to make. I received 2 dif opinions from 2 dif surgeons. The first surgeon wanted to do a bil mastectomy - preventative. The 2nd surgeon sugested only a lump since the tumor was 2 cm and he felt there was no need to remove healthy tissue. He also discussed the pro's and con's and there was no added benefit (for me) to remove the breasts. I opted for the lump. I felt very comfortable with the lump and still do. It's important to make a decision that you can live with. Also, consider your options and which option gives YOU the highest chance of being cancer free. Sometimes when you review the options the decision is obvious. I also prayed on it and asked God for guidance. Oh, don't forget to also listen to your heart. Best wishes.

Love and hugs...

LizM

Hi November ladies. I'm halfway thru rads and thought I would pop in and see how everyone is doing.

Debbie, I had a bi-lateral mastectomy with immediate reconstruction. My surgeon did a radical modified skin sparing mastectomy on the left and a skin sparing simple mastectomy (prophylactic) on the right. Turns out the breast tissue on the right had atypical lobular hyperplasia so it probably would have cooked up the same thing as the left down the road. My surgery was 4 1/2 hours and my plastic surgeon put in tissue expanders when the breast surgeon was finished with his part. I did not have any trouble with recovery, no infections or problems. I have never regretted my decision as I know I would have worried all the time about the other breast plus an added bonus is that they match. Good luck with your decision. Just follow your gut and do what is right for you.

Kim, you haven't been posting in the May rads thread. Hope everything is going Ok with rads.

Odalys, did I read that you are finished with rads. I guess that means you are finished with treatment. Congratulations.

You all take care. Liz

LAT56

I absolutely LOVE the photos! Thanks for sharing them.

I spent most of yesterday catching up on posts as I have been on vacation. I traveled to Alabama to see my nephew graduate from Officer Training School. It was such an honor to be a part of the ceremonies! So now I've been trying to recuperate - I still have such a problem with fatigue. It hits so hard & fast! And there's issues with my mind & memory!! Plus my hair hasn't been growing at all! (My last chemo treatment was on March 15th & I've been told I don't need rads) Maybe patience is the lesson to be learned!

I see that some of you are participating in the Relay for Life. I've been asked by a neighbor to join her team and also take part in the survivors walk. I feel new friendships are on the way!!

I want to thank everyone for their honesty, strength, & humor.
You are in my thoughts & prayers,
LAT56

Odalys

Liz - How nice to hear from you again. Yes, I finished rads and now is off to get an ooph and 5 years of AI. I see you have a new avatar, glad to finally put a face to the name.

Lat56 - Glad you checked in I was wondering how you were doing. Great news about the potential for new friends. Amazing how bc tends to unite us.

Ladies - It has been a very nice weekend so far. I guess you can say this is the first normal weekend we have had since the bc dx. It's so normal I even got my period....oops, I thought chemo would cause me to go into menopause, not! I never thought I would be happy to get my period but I am and somehow it's a sign that things are normal again. I know is probably my denial talking but I sure wish I did not have to go through early menopause and have to take those nasty AI's for 5 years. I am so concerned about quality of life while on the meds and frankly I just want things to be normal again. Sorry, if I am rambling on. I think you all understand the mixed emotions.

Love and hugs...

Margerie

I understand mixed emotions Odalys!

When bc takes away so much, you just want it to stop. You want to be as close to normal as possible.

I put off thinking about my ooph and AI until the end of chemo. I think I was just as apprehensive about the AI's as I was about chemo. ANd I think most women mourn losing the ability to have children, if it is natural menopause or not. Unless you have 11 kids- then maybe you would celebrate!

Anyway, I had the ooph and I must say I have no regrets. I haven't missed those ovaries yet. I gave away all of my pads, tampons and I threw out all of my period underwear.

Arimidex has not been as bad as I thought. Truthfully I have some nightsweats (less than chemopause), some joint soreness (morning), and some insomnia. The insomnia is much better now that I switched to taking it in the morning.

I get how you are feeling. My only period since starting chemo was in Jan. At the time, I did not know it would be my last.

My heart aches for you sweet lady. I can see this is very hard for you. I hope you are at peace soon with whatever decision you make.

Mary-Lou

Just a drive by. Wanted to wish you all a great day. Back to rads tomorrow. I'm really cooking, just 13 to go. But you still cook about two weeks post treatment. I'm holding on.

AnnaM

A drive by here, too. Had Herceptin # 19 this afternoon. Stepdaughter left yesterday; SIL leaves tomorrow. I'll have some time soon, I hope. It's very very hot here in VA, 94 today and humid. Our entire town was roadblocked when I came home from chemo this afternoon. Power line down across a major route. It took me 2 and a half hours to go what normally takes 50 minutes. Whew! Vive le air conditioné!

Hugs to all my buddies,

Anna

Odalys

Anna - I second that. Sounds like a day in Miami. Stay cool my friend. Talk with you soon.
Love,

Odalys

ML - Hang in there the end is near for you too.
Love,

Mary-Lou

Does anyone have aches all over? My fingers are very stiff. And my hip and legs are giving me a fit. My rads Onc gave me a mussel relaxer to help me sleep the night through. And to relieve the stress of rads to my body.

I'm so tired , and just want this over. I think the heat has really gotten to me. I love being outside. But the sun and the heat is off limits now while I'm still doing treatments. Grrrrrr

I would have been finished if I hadn't had to have surgery. Grrrrrrrrr

I just have to pray more about it.

Sierra

Mary Lou:

sorry to hear you are having this

that is the way it is
if you are on taxol

I had this
a great deal
even now fingies
get stiff


hang in there

sending out hugs
and healing to you

((((BCMary)))

Anonymous

Hi everyone...sounds like a few of us need a hug and smile right about now. So, HUG!!!!

I sent out the journals today! I'm so excited-I feel like it is Christmas or something.

I had to have a CT scan last Friday because of that nagging pain I've been having in my chest, and it is unofficially "clear." My onc. doesn't have official results, but he looked at it while on the phone with me.

Still waiting to schedule surgery-met with surgeon on Friday night (have I posted here since then?! I can't remember!). She told me they'd have me scheduled in about 3 weeks. Thanks everyone for your thoughts on full or partial mastectomy/lumpectomy. I really feel confident I am going to just have both of my little monsters removed. I'd love to be able to wear a shirt with buttons on them!

Took Daniel outside to splash in his new dragon pool yesterday. It was SO cute and tons of fun! I even went outside topless! Oh, I also went topless to church and the grocery store! Caught tons of people staring at me while at the store, but I dont' care! I'm TOO HOT with that stupid hanky on my head!

Gotta go to bed. Love you all!
Love and prayers, Debbie

Anonymous

YAY! I have 350 posts now!

Odalys

Margerie - Thanks for your kind words. Nice to have you with me on this journey. Hugs...

Odalys

ML - About half way through rads I became very tired. So tired that I had to take time off from work. Now, I'm not as tired but still very stiff. It is very difficult to get going in the morning because fingers and legs are very stiff and the bottom of my feet hurt when I try to walk. The stiffness does go away after I start moving. I do sleep better than ever since I started rads, no more sleeping pills.

Hope the pain goes away soon and you can get some rest.

Odalys

Deb - great news about the CT Scan, doc usually can tell right away. I hope the good news continue for you. Glad you had a good time with Daniel. Children are so cute at his age.

Ladies - My new hair is full of gray and DH and my sister suggested I colored it so I could go topless. Well, I tried a lighter color than my natural color and I don't like how it looks so it's back to the wig until I can color it again. How exciting to be picking out hair color again! I never asked the onc if I could color my hair, too late now.

Hugs...

kim825

Hello everyone. I am also sending hugs out to all of you. I have 9 rads down. 19 to go. (yep I can do math, LOL) I am tired. I am pretty upset about doing rads through the summer. We love to go to the community pool and I will have to cover up from my head, (not going topless yet) down to my waist. But for the kids I will do it. School is out next week and then by 2 days later I'll hear I'm bored!! LOL!!
Saw onc. yesterday. Pretty uneventful appt. He is satisfied how things are going. I will have a CAT Scan done in July (beginning) to see how well the rads and Xeloda are working. I can't stand the waiting. I will be thinking about this scan all the way through June until the results come in. When will this feeling stop? How do you get this feeling to stop?
Deb, that is great about your scan. Yahoo!!
LAT56, good to see you. Glad you had a great vacation. I am doing a Relay for Life the end of June. I can't wait.
Liz, I am around, just don't get time to post much. Rads is going fine. No pain, yet? This is the first full cycle of xeloda with rads, so we will see how it goes.
Anna, yep it is hot here too. Too hot, too fast.
ML, no pain from rads, but tired. By 7pm I am done for the day and that is with taking a nap during the day, LOL!
Odalys, I want to color my hair too. I don't have much there, but it is coming in pretty gray.
Hope you are all having a great week.

Love and hugs,
Kim

AnnaM

Mary Lou: My oncologist told me she thinks my aches and pains are because chemo has put me into menopause and my body hasn't had time to adjust. Menopause means less lubrication in all those joints, so they hurt. She says it will get better, though, and to keep moving as much as possible. Hard to move in this heat though, right?

I go topless all the time now. My hair is shortshortshort, but at least it totally covers my head. It seems to be the same color as before. It used to be totally curly. Right now it looks like it is curly in the back, but sort of straight on top, so I have my brother's hairdo. I almost like my new do, it sure doesn't take any time in the morning! I used to fight the "badhairdayfrizzies," but don't have enough to frizz right now. I'm thinking I might just keep it this short right through the Virginia monsoon season.

I am absolutely relishing having my home back! I feel like I am on vacation or something.

Love to all, Anna

Mary-Lou

I tried the Fanci Full temporary hair colour tonight. It was hard to fight the run off, and I should have put it on again after it dried, but it does look a little less silver. Did it just for fun.






I hear when you color for the fist time it turns more red. What did yours look like Odayls?

I look like a bag lady. Seems to be the look lately. I had #22 treatment today. They stopped the nodes for 4 days. Now I'm just having 2 fields.

Hope all of you are doing well. I had a big break down this morning. I'm having a yard sale over the week end Fri-Sat. Just to tired. And my legs and feet just kill me.

WHAT WAS I THINKING.....

And I think Michael is at his breaking point. He was short with me this morning. I know he has so much on his plate, and I'm no help at all. I just feel overwhelmed.

Maybe I just want this to be over to soon. And I know he misses his old wife. Maybe it will feel better after I vent here. I sure hope so.

I LOVE YOU ALL ! What would I do without all of you by my side.

Mary-Lou

Anna, thanks for the advice. I feel 80 years old when I get up. I hope we can soon look back on all this.

Anonymous

Oh ML-I'm sorry about what you are feeling. It is hard to watch our husbands/loved ones hurt because we are hurting. As always, I really wish I had a magical phrase to offer my sisters when they are feeling badly. Just try to give your sadness and frustration to God. He will help you carry your burdens. We all will do what we can to carry them with you, too! We love you! PS-as an afterthought, I think your hubby was short with the cancer, not you. He loves you completely and totally. That is so clear to me!

Anna, you have me worried about menopause! How old are you? I can't remember. Anyway, I have been achey all this time and I've been done with treatment 3 weeks tomorrow! Yippee! Anyway, how do we officially know about menopause? We still want to have another baby.

Well-funny I started out with both those topics. Greg just asked me "Have you heard anything else about that medicine you are supposed to go on after surgery?" I looked at him quizzically, and realized he meant tamoxifen or herceptin. He totally blocked out the whole tumor markers saga. He had no idea that I am not able to take either one. So after I re-explained everything to him, he just looked at me like I killed his puppy. I felt so sad seeing that look on his face. He softly apologized for "getting that wrong," and looked away from me. OH MAN. This disease is awful.

Also, I am going to vent quickly about Daniel's speech therapist who thinks she is "in the club" because her neighbor has bc. So whenever I chat with Daniel's occupational therapist (whose MIL just finished chemo for ovarian cancer the week before I did) about anything cancer-related, she adds her own two cents' worth. It drives me nuts. I know she means well, but you just don't know this disease unless you live it.

Finally, I am really worried I am missing some of you guys for the next exchange. I tried to go back and find where people mentioned they wanted to be added for #2, but it would take days! Can you please remind me if I missed anyone? Off the top of my head, I have Margerie, Mary Lou, Odalys...Ack! email me if I am missing any of you! Did I miss you, Kim?

Ok, gotta go. I'm supposed to be ordering birthday party supplies for Daniel's birthday! Love and prayers, Debbie

Odalys

ML - Wow, you have a full head of hair. I don't have as much hair on top. I wanted to go a little lighter than my natural color so I selected a medium golden brown but it turned red/orange...yuk! Next time I will just select the same dark brown color as before. I don't want to experiment with my new hair.

Deb - Does your onc know you want to have another child?

Oh, I'm so tired right now I can't think or write anymore. I had a long day at work and it is late. Good night ladies, talk with you tomorrow.