Flat on one side w/ no prosthesis and large breast?

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Hi all,

I know the topic of reconstruction or not has been posted, and there are lots of ladies who did not reconstruct and are happy.  Is there anyone out there who has large breasts (I am a 34D) who opted to stay flat on one side and NOT wear prosthesis?  I used to love to wear shelf- bra camisoles in the summer and spend a lot of time in a bathing suit and I think the prosthesis is just a hassle.  It is definitly very noticeable that I only have one breast.  So far I am comfortable around family and friends doing that, and wearing a loose t-shirt out and about - I figure it's for them to deal with and not me.  I actually forget about it unless I happen to look in a mirror. 

 But what about in a business situation?   I have to wear a bra for support on the remaining breast and it is still pretty obvious.  Anyone out there going "lop-sided" with larger breasts like mine?  I feel like it would be very distracting and make me the center of attention.  And I haven't ever seen a woman who I could tell only had one breast - I think I would definitely notice now!

 Thanks,

Leila 

Comments

  • Erica3681
    Erica3681 Member Posts: 1,916
    edited June 2008

    Hi Leila,

    In those business situations, where you're wearing a bra anyway, you might consider an unweighted breast form (like the Amoena Leisure Form, Style 126) or a slightly-weighted non-silicone form (like the Still You Illusion--you'd probably need the oval shape for the D projection--they run large, so probably a B or C cup for you, since you're only 34 band width).

    There's a new company called Silique, which is introducing some exciting new options in lightweight forms. I'll report more after I've had a chance to try them.

    I had a bilateral and even though I'm symmetrical, I've been too self-conscious to go without forms. I admire you for doing it. I hope you'll hear from others who have made that choice and found clothing and other options that work.

    Check out my non-profit website, BreastFree.org--in the Going Form-Free section, there's a link to a designer who makes clothes for women with unilateral mastectomies.

    Barbara

  • goodrhue
    goodrhue Member Posts: 60
    edited June 2008

    Thanks Barbara!  I have looked at your website and some fo the clothing styles look fabulous, but it looks like you have to go to the store in NYC to buy then.  I think I'm going to try one of the lighter-weight prostheses and see if I like that better than the silicone one. 

  • SusaninSF
    SusaninSF Member Posts: 1,213
    edited June 2008

    Leila,

    I haven't tried the one flat side myself but I have a friend who works with a woman who does. He said it took him a while to notice since he thinks it's rude to look at a woman's breasts. When he did notice, he didn't think it was any big deal. He said her remaining breast is very large but that she wears loose tops so it isn't immediately noticeable. Anyway, he said that no one who works with her seems to care.

    - Susan

  • debiker
    debiker Member Posts: 21
    edited July 2008

    I just found out less than a week ago that my "lumphectomy" did not have clear margins so I have decided to go with mastectomy. I have this same size 34D and triathlon is my passion so I am worried about how I am going to manage this. When I am working and have a bra on I think it will be OK, I may have to get rid of some of my clothes. Anyone here have suggestions for biking and running in those swim clothes??

  • Erica3681
    Erica3681 Member Posts: 1,916
    edited July 2008

    One suggestion I have is the unweighted breastform I use for athletic activity (I'm a bilateral)--Amoena Leisure form style 126. I know people who sew these forms directly into their swimsuits, so I'm thinkiing that you could perhaps do the same, unless you feel you need some weight to balance your D side.

    Don't throw out your clothes yet! I wear everything I wore before (though if I'd had much cleavage-showing stuff, I suppose I would have been in trouble).

    Barbara

    BreastFree.org 

  • starzhere
    starzhere Member Posts: 162
    edited July 2008

    I'm also a 34D and wear a prosthesis when I go out in public, because my clothes fit better and I don't want to be limited to wearing "big tops".  I like more fitted clothing.  However, I do go without when I am at home.

    I love the concept of designing balanced clothing for women who have had a mastecomy.  The Chikcaradesign.com site has fabulous designs.  However they are expensive and still too limited for a full wardrobe.  It would be great if someone came up with some patterns for making one's own clothing.

    ~elaine~ 

  • debiker
    debiker Member Posts: 21
    edited July 2008

    I went to breastfree.org and it is a very helpful site. The photos really help me and are not unlike what I already have with my lumpectomy. I have an appointment with the plastic surgeon July 31st. I just want to hear what she has to say. Today I told my surgeon I was definitely having mastectomy and considering not having reconstruction. I also told her I think being lopsided will be a challenge. She then said the plastic surgeon would want to reduce my "good" breast. Now I am leaning more towards bilateral mastectomy. This forum has really helped me to think through all the options.

  • starzhere
    starzhere Member Posts: 162
    edited July 2008

    If you have a bilateral, you'll get balance which ever way decide to go.  I think you'll be happier and it does reduce your risk of developing breast cancer in your healthy breast to 1%.

     ~elaine~

  • rseaw22
    rseaw22 Member Posts: 110
    edited July 2008

    I just met with my surgeon today and she laid out the plan which is a mastecomy with radiation - so no immediate recon option.  I am a saggy 36DD and hate the thought of being lopsided. (also hate the thought of BC...)  It seems like the only downside is loosing sensation and frankly a good foot rub turns me on...  This discussion helps - I asked about a bilateral and she said more people are voicing regret after doing it and she suggests waiting til after the rad and letting the PS do it.  The thought of ending up with 2 matching B cups sounds heavenly - just trying to understand the next 6 months.  I am an outside sales rep - and don't want to be the awkward rep that no one wants to see...  Loose tops for 8 months seems manageable.

  • lilith
    lilith Member Posts: 543
    edited July 2008

    Ugh. Why so many doctors still think that a woman reside in her breasts!!!

    when I discovered I was going to have a mastectomy, my first thought was, out with both!!! my doc said the same thing. It took me ONE year to convince everybody, and to be well again so that I could have a recon - during which the second breast was removed, and matching implants put in. I hated being loopsided. I would forget the breastform - and walk around covering myself, stuffing kleenexes in my bra. or I would sweat and feel the plastic form stuck to my skin. yuk.

     If a bilat mastectomy had been performed, I don't think I would have bothered with a recon. Or maybe I would, but it would have been a choice... as it was, a recon was the only way to have the insurance covering the op.

    BTW, I was a 36DD, now am a 36 D. and not sagging...

  • Mary-Lou
    Mary-Lou Member Posts: 2,230
    edited July 2008

    I was a DD, and when I was lopsided my back hurt all the time. I tried the breast form that had weight...(Silicone) But I lost it all the time. After 2 years of fighting with a flat boob, I went for the reconstruction by a PC.

    I'm very happy with the results and don't have to remember to put a body part on before walking out of the door. I would lose my head if it wasn't attached.Embarassed

  • lsfarin
    lsfarin Member Posts: 6
    edited July 2008

    To Debiker's question about working out "lopsided": I, too am very large on my non-mastectomy side (32DDD) and I have found that wearing my old sports bras seems to work out fine for working out. Ditto for the workout swimsuits. People will just have to accept that I'm lopsided (if they even notice -- my swim coach didn't the other day!) and I've found that those snug undergarments (and swimsuits) hold me in just fine despite the lack of bulk on the opposite side.

  • rseaw22
    rseaw22 Member Posts: 110
    edited July 2008

    Isafarin, do you have trouble with swimming or running with the mismatch weight?  I know depression is a big problem and excercise is an obvious help - how much does the lopsidedness effect you? 

    Also, my radiologist just told me that mas patients tend to have more problems with skin irritation - obviously I can't go to my office without a bra - was wearing one manageable?  I'm scheduled for 6 weeks of daily rad.

  • lsfarin
    lsfarin Member Posts: 6
    edited July 2008

    Hi rseaw22 -- fortunately, since I opted for mastectomy I won't have to have any radiation (yay!) so the skin irritation isn't really an issue for me. But as far as the lopsidedness affecting my swimming and such -- no, I haven't noticed anything. I don't run (lousy knee), but swim 3x a week, whitewater kayak as often as I can, and go to pilates class about once a week. Right now, I'm wearing one of my new bras with "pockets" but without the prosthesis because I don't really care for it. Every once in a while the bottom of the bra (sports bras, too) will begin to ride up on my chest, but a quick tug takes care of it.

  • Aponi
    Aponi Member Posts: 16
    edited August 2008

    I also have one large breast (DD) & hate wearing my breast form. I find it irritating still (I get rashes) & it's been nearly 2 years. My bras all ride up on the mastectomy side even though my form is weighted & it looks really goofy with it higher than the other. I'm allergic to adhesives so was thinking of making something to hook the bottom of my bra to the waistband of my jeans, but mostly I just go formless & wear a sports bra.

  • SusaninSF
    SusaninSF Member Posts: 1,213
    edited August 2008

    Wow! I've been out of town for about a month so haven't been on the board for awhile. I think this is the first thread I've seen on this topic. I used to wonder if I was one of the few women out there with a unilateral and one large breast (DD). A lot of the issues with prostheses and bras are so different for larger breasted women.

    I've often fantasized about having my left breast reduced but am just so sick of surgery I can't face it for now. I have also heard that reduction surgery can leave a lot of scars and it's hard to face having more of those too!

    I have been able to find a form I like, the Amoena Tria Contact Lite that sticks to your chest wall. This helps to keep it in place and distributes the weight more like a real breast. Aponi, this might help you with your problem of the form side riding up. I have also taken to wearing a Janac sports bra more frequently as it compresses everything down.

    Kudos to you girls who go without a form after a unilateral. I haven't had the guts yet and feel a bit asymetrically weighted without one. I suppose this is something I would get used to if I did it often. 

  • Erica3681
    Erica3681 Member Posts: 1,916
    edited August 2008

    Aponi,

    In addition to SusaninSF's idea about trying the Amoena Contact form, have you thought about trying one of the non-silicone options? The Still You Illusions form has a little bit of weight so might help hold your bra in place, but is soft and comfortable against the skin. 

    I often wear an Airway Tritex form, which has very soft microfiber fabric on the back of a silicone form. Like you, I have sensitive skin prone to rashes. I've never had a problem with the Tritex, or with the Illusions, which I also use. Another form to consider is the Pals, which is a non-silicone gel, very soft against the skin. Also, a new company, Silique, makes a silicone form with a microfiber back, similar to the Tritex, but presently less expensive. It's called Silique Comfort-Tex. I've tried it and find it much more comfortable than regular silicone forms.

    I think you can probably find a solution if you're willing to experiment a bit. All the forms I mentioned are reviewed (with links) in the Breast Forms sectionon of my BreastFree website (I'm currently updating that section and will add the Silique form to my list of recommendations in the next couple of days). 

    SusaninSF,

    Hope you had a good month doing something fun. I agree that your situation and Aponi's, with one large remaining breast after a unilateral, is less common and more challenging. It's wonderful that you've found the Tria Contact. I can totally relate about not wanting more surgery. The idea of trying reconstruction gets less and less appealing to me the further out I get from my bilat surgery.

    Barbara 

  • barbz
    barbz Member Posts: 3
    edited August 2008

    I'm new here, and so far I have had a problem with this message board. If this message does not go through, I think I will give up.Undecided 

     I found topics on Metaplastic Carcinoma Breast cancer, but when I went to post a message I had to verify my email address sevearl times. When I finally got accepted to post, and came back, I could not find the topic, I wanted to post this message on. So if this topic is in the wrong catagory I apoligize.

    I was recently diagnosed with Metaplastic Carcinoma. My doctor had written this out on a piece of paper for me - Chondroid Cartilage - 1 x 1 x 0.5 - ER(-) PR (-) her 2 neu (-) She also informed me that it was a rare form of breast cancer. On the 7th of august I had a radical masectomy. Now on the 28th I have an appointment with the chemo oncologist.

    Now I'm wondering if after the many trips to the oncolgoist, will I even be able to afford a breast prostesis, or a wig???? Does anyone know how much the cost is of a prostesis, or a wig?

  • tomatojuice
    tomatojuice Member Posts: 382
    edited August 2008

    hi Leila what a pretty name. I am a 34D and had a right masectomy in mar 08. Someone from the american cancer society visited me while in hospital and gave me a masect bra and a form(not sure what its made of). But its a soft puff thingy-that you can add or remove the stuffing as you like. I ended up liking it so much. Its all I use. It light and comfy-like a little pillow. And in this hot summer I just couldn't wear one of those breast forms. I also just stick in my regular full figure underwire bras. And it does me fine. It stays in place, and looks fine.The breast form I have is still sitting in its box on my dresser.I also could't get into wearing a wig. Scarves do me fine. I searched around for cotton scarves that were 26x26 or so. And found some nice ones that were cool. My sister had a right masectomy five years ago, and she was very large breasted. She chose to go without any type of prothesis. She also never wore a wig or a scarf. She was just a joyful soul and cared not about the thoughts of others. I also commend you for being brave in that way. I myself have always suffered from vanity.

  • starzhere
    starzhere Member Posts: 162
    edited August 2008

    barbz - talk with your local cancer society if you don't have the money for a wig or prosthesis.  Most of them offer donations of these items.  They, also, have the Look Better, Feel Better program where a cosmotologist will give you makeup and show you how to apply it.

      

  • goodrhue
    goodrhue Member Posts: 60
    edited September 2008

    rseaw22,

    regarding the radiation, my skin was not affected much until the last few weeks, and then for about 2 weeks AFTER it was over.  I started out wearing a sports bra with a silicone form, then when my skin got more irritated wore a stretchy camisole (no shelf bra) and pinned 2 nested foam 'enhancers'  (suggested by owner of a local store that caters to cancer patients) to the outside of the cami.  that worked great with loose-fitting tops in the last weeks of radiation and afterwards when I didn't want anything tight rubbing against my horrific "sunburn".

    -Leila 

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