Mother of daughter with 2 time breast cancer

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wuzycat1
wuzycat1 Member Posts: 7
edited June 2014 in Second or Third Breast Cancer

Hi Everyone. I know this is not really a new topice but I just had to vent. My daughter was diagnosed with breast cancer 2 years ago. Since then she went through 2 lumpectomies and after a 2nd opinion had a total mastectomy. At the same time she had a trans flap using tissue from her abdomin. She also had chemo ( which almost did her in) She developed a painful hard area on the reconstructed breast. 3 weeks ago she had a biopsy done and it came back positive with cancer.We are all devastated. This Thursday ( July 3)she is going in for a partial mastectomy and reconstruction at the Dobbs Ferry Hosp.. We never knew that you could get it again in the same site even if every thing was removed. The only good thing is she had a full body scan and they only see CA in that one site, nowhere else. I have really gotten a lot of info from the posts on your site. Thank you. She is a very strong lady. One of the hardest thing for us is explaining to her four year old daughter why mommy has to have surgery again. I pray that I can continue to be strong for her but everyday I find myself faltering although not in front of her, Thanks again for letting me vent. I would appreciate any coments you have. I feel so lost right now.

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  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited July 2008

    Wuzy

    Im so sorry you and your family have to go through all this again!!!! Its just not fair!!!!.

    You remind me of my mom....she, my daughter and best friend were my rocks throughout my journey....I felt so awful when I had to tell my mom that I had breast cancer.....there is just something wrong with a mom having to hear those words....

    You sound so much like my mom....I know she had really bad days dealing with my breast cancer but she never once faultered in front of me....it is extrememly hard on families that have to deal with this type of issue and I think you are doing a wonderful job!!!!!

    Faultering (even though not in front of her) is one of the things that make you a mother....I also feel it is a tribute to the love you have for your daughter....no one can be strong every moment of the day or night.....let yourself be scared for her, cry, rant/rave, you need to stay healthy too!!!!!

    Hugs

    Jule

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  • jdash
    jdash Member Posts: 754
    edited July 2008

    jule and cat

    i can so relate to this topic and what you have said- i was dx 2 times

    once at 39 and again at 49  - telling my daughter and my mom was one of the hardest things i have ever done-  i felt so bad to have to worry  them (my late husband- my daughters dad died of cancer when he was 32, daughter was 2 so having to tell her was especially hard ! and i always stayed strong in front of them  but they were always there for me and that helped me so much - just knowing that someone is there if you need them is the greatest gift of all !

    it sounds like your daughter will be just fine after her surgery and that is wonderful   thank god she caught it early   - hope everything goes well for her

    xoxox

    julia

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  • jdash
    jdash Member Posts: 754
    edited July 2008

    jule and cat

    i can so relate to this topic and what you have said- i was dx 2 times

    once at 39 and again at 49  - telling my daughter and my mom was one of the hardest things i have ever done-  i felt so bad to have to worry  them (my late husband- my daughters dad died of cancer when he was 32, daughter was 2 so having to tell her was especially hard ! and i always stayed strong in front of them  but they were always there for me and that helped me so much - just knowing that someone is there if you need them is the greatest gift of all !

    it sounds like your daughter will be just fine after her surgery and that is wonderful   thank god she caught it early   - hope everything goes well for her

    xoxox

    julia

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  • Ivylane
    Ivylane Member Posts: 544
    edited July 2008

    Hi all: 

    Wuzy:  Did you mean Dobbs Ferry NY?  That is pretty close to me...

    I am a two time 17 year survivor.  Wasn't any fun the second time around either.  Hopefully your daughter will come through this fine.  IT sounds like a pretty good prognosis.  I will keep you both in my thoughts.  Good luck and let us know how you make out.  Hang in there!! 

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  • wuzycat1
    wuzycat1 Member Posts: 7
    edited July 2008

    Hi Jule,

    Thank you so much for the beautiful letter. I'm so sorry you and your family had to go thru this also. Tomorrow is Gwen's surgery and I'm holding it together. She is also very strong and I know she hates putting us thru this. I Tell her her that none of this is her fault and she has nothing to be sorry about. We  Just want her to get well again. Today we are going to spend the day together doing last minute things. Your words meant a lot to me.

    Luz

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  • wuzycat1
    wuzycat1 Member Posts: 7
    edited July 2008

    Hi Julia,

    Wow !! You are a very stronge person. I guess We fine strength from somewhere for our loved ones.How is your little girl? I'm sure she gets her strength from you and your mom. How are you doing? Gwen's surgery is tomorrow.One of my biggest fears is that they will find that the cancer is worse than they thought. That's what happen the last time. I just can't wait till it's over with and she is resting in her bed. Thank you for the words of encouragement. What is your cats name? We have a 1 year old cat named Midnite. The way he is around Gwen you know he sense what's going on.

    Luz 

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  • wuzycat1
    wuzycat1 Member Posts: 7
    edited July 2008

    Hi Blue 16.

    Reading that you are a 2X -17 year survivor made my day. That gives me more hope than you can imagine.Yes, it is The Community Hospital at Dobbs Ferry in NY. Her Doctor is Dr, Ashicari He has the breast center there. Her surgery is tomorrow morning. Thank you for the thoughts and good wishes. I will keep you all in touch on how it all goes.

    Luz

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  • Ivylane
    Ivylane Member Posts: 544
    edited July 2008

    Hi Luz: Just checking in to  see how you are holding up.  By this tomorrow night you should know something and be able to get a night's sleep.  You and your daughter will be in my thoughts and prayers tonight....Good luck tomorrow and post when you can...

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  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited July 2008

    Hi Luz

    I too am just checking in to see how things are going......and keeping you in my thoughts.

    Hugs

    Jule

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  • cp418
    cp418 Member Posts: 7,079
    edited July 2008

    Sending your daughter healing strength and get well wishes for a speedy recovery.  Hugs Joann

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  • wuzycat1
    wuzycat1 Member Posts: 7
    edited July 2008

    Hi All,

    Frist I want to say that I was blessed to find a group with such caring and beautiful people as all of you. You have helped me through one of the most difficult times in my lfe with your kind words of encouragement. Thank You. Well it's over. Gwen is such a strong girl. She was in surgery for 3 1/2 to 4 hours.David ( her husband) and I felt like it was longer. When Dr. Ashicari came out he told us that everything went well. He also removed an enlarged lympnoid and it was cancer free. She was in her room by 1 PM am they had her walking to the bathroom by 5 PM. Now we are waiting on the results of the tissue they removed to find our the type of treatment she will get. Radiation is a definate.I feel like a big heavy weight has been removed from my shoulders although I know this is only half the battle.. When she comes home it will be to my house. This way I can help her with the drains,the baby  etc. Thanks again for everything

    Luz

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  • Ivylane
    Ivylane Member Posts: 544
    edited July 2008

    Luz:  So glad to hear that the surgery went well!  Once a treatment plan is in place you will all feel better.  Try to get some rest now .  Your daughter is being cared for at the hospital.  YOU need to take care of YOU right now.  Take care and let us know how things are going.

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  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited July 2008

    Luz,

    Thank you for letting us know that she's doing well......You are such a wonderful mom!!!!!!!! and Blue is right....you need to take care of you right now so that you wont get too worn out taking care of your daughter and little one...

    Keep us posted on how things are going and if there is anything we can do to help.

    Jule

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  • jdash
    jdash Member Posts: 754
    edited July 2008

    luz thats wonderful news  so happy things are going so well

    keep us posted  we are all praying for a quick recovery !

    xoxoxoxox

    julia

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  • wuzycat1
    wuzycat1 Member Posts: 7
    edited July 2008

    Hi Everyone,

    I'm sorry it has been a while since I posted. Just wanted to let you know that Gwen is ok. Drains are removed but she is still in a lot of pain. She got her results and although they said they were ok she still might need chemo after radiation and hormones and anti body pills. I'm really not sure what that means. She got in touch with Slones and has to send all her records there.That is our second opinion. They said something about she still has floater cancer cells.This almost put her in a panic.She still has a dressing on her back. They can't begin radiation until she is completely healed.Thanks again for all your good wishes and prayers.

    Luz

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  • wuzycat1
    wuzycat1 Member Posts: 7
    edited October 2008

    Hi to All,

    Just a little update on Gwen, She has about a week and a half of radiation to go. It has been hard especially now with the blistering and all that. She is still working even though it's so painful at times.I try to help her as much as I can. Soon we will find out if she has to go thru Chemo again. I feel so apprehensive at times but I know we must take it one day at a time and have a lot of faith.

    How is everyone? I hope you are all well.Bless you all

    Luz

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