having trouble moving on

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purronna
purronna Member Posts: 6
edited June 2014 in Life After Breast Cancer
having trouble moving on
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  • purronna
    purronna Member Posts: 6
    edited June 2008

    please help. im divorced no kids very small support group. before bc her2 pos. i was active physically, volunteered, worked w/animals and freelance artist. my dom arm was 1 w/bc, had nodes and mastectomy, major chemo, and herceptin. this was in july o5.

    as of now, i cry all the time, feel very lonely, my arm doesnt function as it did, so i cant paint 4 now, or wirte. after 5 minutes of holdingpen, my fingers stiffen, numb, tingle, alo;ng w/intense pain in arm, my breast nerves feel like theyre ripping. and my new implant burns. bottom line.......im having major problems w/everyday issues. i go 2 support groups. they dont help much, i read alo;t of self help books. they help, but im really lonely. i used 2 have a active social life, was outgoing, try 2w help others. now i 2 like alot ofu, feel so damn tired all the time. and in pain. i presently applied fo disability and denied. i have 2 have a hearing and trying 2 get approved. ne 1 know about this. i was phased out of job, cause i didnt perform as i used 2, looked 4 job 2 no avail got one. my mom is 80and has her own issues. ofcourse im grateful that im here but could use advise how 2 get back on track. i was very productive and made a vow 2 make a difference, i was upbeat and helpful. pls someone help. i dont want 2 waste x anymore. thank u and God bless 2 all. r

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  • texasmom
    texasmom Member Posts: 121
    edited June 2008

    Sorry you are feeling so bad and are so blue. Maybe someone on this site lives near you and you could connect with them. You don't say in what area you are located.

    You might contact the American Cancer Society. They have local chapters and support groups. There may be people that you could make friends with in your area. I believe that they also can refer you to other groups that can help with finances, medicines, etc.  I know some people get busy with cancer groups organizing walks and fundraisers. There is a medical clinic for low income women in my area. You may have one near you and could volunteer there. I have found that nothing makes you feel better to see others that are worse off than you are. It puts things into purspective.

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  • texasmom
    texasmom Member Posts: 121
    edited June 2008

    Oops, I see you are in New York. I have seen many people on this board that live in that area. I am in Texas so can't help much.

    Do you have a church nearby? You might have a talk with a minister. They are trained counselors and you might have more of a support group with people from the church.

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  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited June 2008

    puronna....Texasmom is right in that there area  number of Long Island and New York girls on these boards. Why don't you try posting over on the "Singles..." board where alot of them hang out? Or you might PM a few of them for ideas or to meet up. BethNY is very active here, but is currently in the middle of a bit of surgery and may not be back here for a day or so. There's also nosurrender and AnnNY and probably a ton of others I'm forgetting.

    It really is so very hard getting past all of the crap that comes with a breast cancer diagnosis and treatment and extremely important that you have an avenue to vent your feelings and get support. Stick around here and you'll probably get both!

    ~Marin

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  • Jellydonut
    Jellydonut Member Posts: 1,043
    edited August 2008

    Purronna, breast cancer is a disease that definitely affects more than our breasts.  I'm now passed the six year mark but it took me at least five years to resolve major issues related to this illness.  For some of us it's not an easy road, but the good news is with support your life can once again have meaning.

    I did partake in private counseling for six months with a therapist and she did help me to "adjust" my thinking. 

    Purronna, as far as work, you may want to check New York Vocational Rehabilitation Program.  They may be able to assist you in finding enjoyable and suitable employment.  Usually there is no cost to the consumer for these services.  They are skilled in working with people with disabilities to enable them to find employment.  You would need your doctor to verify your disability and also to give the go-ahead that you are able to work.  Please PM me if you need more information.

    You came to a good place for support.  I too am alone and I will tell you that the gloom/anger/depression thankfully doesn't last forever.

    Best wishes to you.

    Jelly

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  • Miss_Lolli
    Miss_Lolli Member Posts: 560
    edited June 2008

    I don't have many more suggestions beyond what these wise and wonderful women have said. I know I had a hard time post-chemo and was on the verge of asking for chemical help when the fog lifted, but it still settles back in occasionally. I just let myself have those days. You definitely should not have to feel they way you are, and I really hope you seek some help from the outside. Sometimes it takes another's perspective to reach a solution. Or it may be as simple as an anti-depressant to get your brain chemistry back on track.

    I just want to add you to my thoughts and prayers. God bless you too. I hope things turn around for you soon.

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