I can't get my act together and I don't know why

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  • kes
    kes Member Posts: 559
    edited May 2008

    Gsg,

    If I set off one more alarm going into a store then someone is going to get a carrott cake in the face.!!!!!! Or maybe some Ben and Jerry's!!!!

    Kerry

  • gsg
    gsg Member Posts: 3,386
    edited May 2008

    wait..i just saw the part where you found a boob in your drawer, Ms. S.  That really reads funny. LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • wishiwere
    wishiwere Member Posts: 3,793
    edited May 2008
    Woah, MISS S!  Wozers!  You did fine dear lady!  The first done prize goes to you!  Go to your nearest DQ and ask for the first drawer cleaned on BC.org prize!  They'll know what you mean! Surprised
  • kes
    kes Member Posts: 559
    edited May 2008

    Do they have any Ben and Jerry's at DQ? Maybe I should go and do the undie drawer so I can win 2nd prize. Have you seen the new commercial for the fudge brownie delight in an edible bowl at DQ? It looks so yummy!!!

    Kerry

  • gsg
    gsg Member Posts: 3,386
    edited May 2008

    yep, i've seen it, kerry.  i hope i dream about it tonight.

  • AlaskaDeb
    AlaskaDeb Member Posts: 2,601
    edited May 2008

    LOL....now I'm hungry for ice cream!  I already ate the cake.  DH and kids are at a movie.  I just left them a voice mail on the cell to bring home Coldstone ice cream.....I'm a bad, bad girl...

    Deb C

  • Hanna60978
    Hanna60978 Member Posts: 815
    edited May 2008

    I have that underwear!  The Barely There that will cover your butt, your gut, or a VW!  It's true.  No wonder I can never find them anymore.  The guy up the road has his car covered in the beige. Next time I find them - they come 3 to a pack - I'll keep the black and give him the beige. 

    I like going commando to except if I think I might end up in the ER. 

    Right now I'm going for that sundae you got me craving.

    Gee thanks. 

  • gsg
    gsg Member Posts: 3,386
    edited May 2008

    the funniest underwear i've ever had on is what they gave me in the hospital.  it had no shape and was made out of mesh.  you could put it on and pull it up over your face.  i LOVED it.  it provided me hours of entertainment in what would have been an otherwise dreary hospital stay.  every person who walked into my room, including my doctors, had to witness me pulling the underwear i had on up over my head.

  • AlaskaDeb
    AlaskaDeb Member Posts: 2,601
    edited May 2008

    g- please tell me you still have the mesh undies!  I want PHOTOS!!!  LOLOL

  • gsg
    gsg Member Posts: 3,386
    edited May 2008

    i did bring some home with me...i begged an aide for them...but they finally got so stretched out of shape, i reluctantly had to throw them out.  if i'm ever admitted there again, i will provide photos.  they were the best!  from the back, they made my butt look like a sack of onions.  my husband got sick of me saying, "look!" when i had them on.

  • gsg
    gsg Member Posts: 3,386
    edited May 2008

    i would pull them up over my face and stick my tongue out through the holes in the mesh.  kind of ridiculous for a 50-year-old, but i couldn't help it.

  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited May 2008

    Rotflol, my butt is so big it stresses the VWbus undies! Maybe I could get some of the mesh stuff. Oh, I have a funny undies story.

    For a while after my marriage broke up, my kids were sharing a dresser with me. My four yo son got some of my bloomers out one morning and was trying to put them over his head. He thought it was a tank top, but wondered who sewed the neck hole shut. LOL

    Patrice, the boob in the drawer was a beanie boobie made for me by one of my friends. She made me four of them, but two are currently MIA, lost in the abyss that is my bedroom. If I keep cleaning, I know the other two will show up.

    I'm headed to DQ to get my brownie drawers delight. :) I should mention that Deb was the real winner and I'm 2nd place, tho.

    Miss S

  • gsg
    gsg Member Posts: 3,386
    edited May 2008

    hanna should throw the vw bus undies over the wh*re teenage neighbor girl who likes to expose herself under a street light that she talked about in the bitch thread.

    my apologies if anybody is offended by that post.  i had to use that word to make it read better. 

    LMAO at the tank top undies! 

  • kes
    kes Member Posts: 559
    edited May 2008

    I will donate all of my tie dyed undies to Hanna's neighbour's weird daughter. We can use Shirley's car to drive them over and then go to DQ and get one of those new brownie fudge edible bowl delights. I will do that right after I get the undie drawer cleaned out.

    Mesh Panties,   Don't you just love them.OMG, another thing that we have to go through.UUUUGGGG!!!!!!

    Kerry.

  • Hanna60978
    Hanna60978 Member Posts: 815
    edited May 2008

    No commandos.  We need the stretch mesh undies to trap the hooligans that keep running around the back of my house after they ring the doorbell and run!

    We each grab an edge of the undies (sorry g, we'll have to cut them for the trap), two of us hold one side by the house, the other two by the fence.  Then - when they run around to the dark side, they'll smack splat! into the mesh undies and BOING!! Back into last week!

    I think the weird teenage daughter is giving off too much estrogen  around here.    

  • kes
    kes Member Posts: 559
    edited May 2008

    Hanna,

    The Commando crew to the rescue!!!!We will save you from those hooligans!!!  But first I have to stop at DQ for my brownie fudge bowl delight.

    Kerry

  • gsg
    gsg Member Posts: 3,386
    edited May 2008

    OMG the mental image i'm getting from  your plan.  i'm in!

    you should spike the weird teenage girl's diet coke with arimidex.  that'll slam her legs shut like nobody's business.

  • AlaskaDeb
    AlaskaDeb Member Posts: 2,601
    edited May 2008

    You guys seriously have made my day.  I was so sad this morning, and now I can't quit laughing.  I think if we could just get this stuff written up into a script we could have a broadway show.....10 women with 6 boobs between us and we would bring down the house.....

    Deb C

  • gsg
    gsg Member Posts: 3,386
    edited May 2008

    Deb, have your people call my people.....Cool

    I wonder if we could come up with one whole person if we pooled our body parts.   Frankly, I'm missing most of mine.

    so glad you're able to laugh tonight...that makes *my* night! I'm going to go to bed now...see you girls tomorrow!

  • gsg
    gsg Member Posts: 3,386
    edited May 2008

    it's amazing i can weigh as much as i do with so few parts left.

  • wishiwere
    wishiwere Member Posts: 3,793
    edited May 2008

    SurprisedLaughingWink Too funny Deb~  On that note, I'm taking a motrin and heading to bed!

    G'Nite Ladies!  May all dreams be of sundaes dancing your way with undies that fit, (after the sundae binge) and vacuums that quietly do their jobs before you sleep (without sound)!

    Night and sleep restful dear friends!

  • Harley44
    Harley44 Member Posts: 5,446
    edited May 2008

    I have been out of town for a few days, and I know that I want to read ALL these... but I am so pathetic, I think I better just start at the end...  I may NEVER get to read ALL the posts!  I read Shirley's comments and Deb's and gsg's about cleaning out the closet and drawers...ME, TOO!!  I would clean someone elses, because that is easier... I can never decide what to keep and what to throw out!!  I just MAY need some of this stuff one day!!

    Now I am tired, from the trip back home, so I think I'll go to bed now...  I think I was near you gsg, because I was visiting some friends in DC. 

    Harley

  • Hanna60978
    Hanna60978 Member Posts: 815
    edited May 2008

    What?  You all are calling it a night?!?

    I've been bouncing around looking for you all like a ping pong ball in an empty box.

    Sweeeeet dreams ladies! OXOXO Kiss

  • gsg
    gsg Member Posts: 3,386
    edited May 2008

    Hanna:  Your post just reminded me of something.  My algebra teacher told me my brain was like a BB in an empty boxcar. 

    Now I really am going to bed.  I didn't get my work done today and I'll have to get up really early and hit it hard.  Fortunately, I'm off work tomorrow.  

    We should start a chatline one of these nights when we're all on that we all could call into.  That might be fun. 

    g'night for realz. 

    OXOXO to you!  Kiss

  • kes
    kes Member Posts: 559
    edited May 2008

    Deb,   Some days I wake up and I just feel sooo Sad and I don't know why. Just an overwhelming feeling. Maybe it is homonal with me. Other days I wake up and I fell good. I think that it has something to do with my dreams, but I can't remember most of them. I like Hanna's dreams, about good looking men. I am going to start taking Benedryl.

    I will probably dream about tie dyed undies tonight dancing around and that brownie delight sundae at DQ. I'm sure that my tissue expanders weigh a lot. No one told me how much, but I'm sure all my weight gain is coming from them. Ya, and if you believe that have I got a deal for you...............

    I'm going to bed after I eat the LAST OF THE BEN AND JERRY"S!!!!!!

    Have a good one ladies,

    Kerry

  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited May 2008

    Man, ya'll been busy posting today.  I come back and there's two pages of reading to do.  How did anyone get any work done?  No, I did not clean my drawer. 

    Deb, darn, I'm proud of you.  I read later down the pages that you still had the garbage bag of your old undies in your closet.  Soooo?  I had boxes stacked up for a year before dh got rid of them.  You did good!

    Bin, you're my kind of girl.  Why should WE stress over bills.  My dh made his bed and he's still sleeping in it after 43 years.  Gosh, I'm old!  Bin, you have three dogs.  I have four cats.  Picture that!  And it's been longer than three days since I vacuumed.

    Eeewwww....thongs!  Gross!  One of my dd's likes to wear them when she wears slacks..no panty line.  Yuck!  I'd be picking my butt all day long.  Besides, they don't make them big enough for my arse to fit into them. 

    Well, Patrice et al, dh didn't make the carrot cake.  He didn't know he was supposed to.  Besides, he FINALLY ate the last piece of b'day cake that I made him (although he said it wasn't his b'day cake..yes, we argued about that too until I set HIM straight) that was in the fridge before I threw it out!  I have an idea.  He can start making carrot cakes and He can start an online bakery store.  Notice I said He!

    OMG, I love sundies.  Wishiwere..THERE WITH YOU!

    Kerry, I can see you trying to explain why everytime you pass through those doors you set off the alarm.  No one would know what the heck you're talking about UNLESS they've had bc.  As far as dipping bread in bacon grease, no thanks.  But I do like BLTs.  We don't have them often cuz I don't like frying bacon. 

    Miss S, you do win the prize.  We all don't like you for being so good!

    You do too, Deb.

    Patrice, you must have been special.  I don't know which surgery you're talking about.  I have only had one.  And when I woke up I HAD NOTHING ONE!!!!  NOTHING!!!  I've often wondered if I "messed" up my gown.  How embarrassing would that be!

    Kerry, that pitiful car.  It's been what, two or three days since he said he's gonna fix it?  I hasn't even thunk about it since.

    Hanna says (I like to give credit where credit is due!):

    I think the weird teenage daughter is giving off too much estrogen  around here.

    That's too funny.  Suppose she's in heat?

    And, Patrice responds: 

    you should spike the weird teenage girl's diet coke with arimidex.  that'll slam her legs shut like nobody's business.

    I'm LMAO!

    Deb, these girls are too funny.  We can't feel bad for too long.  Well, my belly is getting exercise it's not used to and will be sore tomorrow.

    Patrice, I have to make a comment about your weight after having body parts removed.  I'm gonna put my prothesis on a scale and weigh it.  It feels like it weighs at least three pounds.  I wonder how much my real boob weighed.  It's on my path report, but not in pounds.  I want to tell my doctors that my boob weighs XX pounds and tell them to deduct that from my weight.

    Harley, welcome back.  Hope you had a great trip.

    Well Hanna, I guess it is nite nite.

    Shirley

  • Isabella4
    Isabella4 Member Posts: 2,166
    edited May 2008

    I just did what Deb did, I just emptied the lot into a black plastic bag....a big one, and, as it wasn't full I started just throwing away about a third of my ironing pile. I can now actually see the sofa it was all piled up on.

    I know I have thrown out mostly rubbish, but in and among were some good pieces, but I know I will never wear them again....its just the thought of all that money I have wasted !!

    I am off to have a fire in my garden now before I open the bag and start bringing things back into the house.

    Isabella.

  • Bren-2007
    Bren-2007 Member Posts: 6,241
    edited May 2008

    I took 3 full garbage bags of clothes to the goodwill two weeks ago. Very expensive clothes I'll never wear and haven't worn in years.  Really ... when was the last time I wore a designer suit to transcribe a report in my home office!! Oh yeah ... I remember ... the last time I was a size 10 and worked for corporate America.  That would be 10 years ago!! I'm now a Layne Bryant jean girl and only wear jammies to work!

    Suits are gone.  Slacks are gone.  Shoes are gone.  Thongs are gone, although I threw those away!

    The only thing in heat around here are the neighbors 30 cats. Will Arimidex work on them??

    Bren

    PS- Shirley, let me know how much those boobs weigh.  I'm thinking about a mast and want to know what kind of weight loss I can expect!

  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited May 2008

    Wow Shirley, you wear your boobs to the weigh ins? I carry mine in my purse and put it on after..... :)

    Miss S

  • kes
    kes Member Posts: 559
    edited May 2008

    I'm sure my tissue expanders weigh a ton, each!!! I have eaten so much Ben and Jerry's that I am now getting zits!!! At my age!!! My child was up ALL night and I kid you not, ALL night. Don't know what is up with her.  No drawer cleaning got done but I will try later, afternoon maybe. Would like to get something done today. Was trying to pay the bills but I got tired of that, so will have to return to that later.

    Kerry

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