Clean mammo, but. . .
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Well, I had long talk with my oncologist yesterday. It went very well; she is absolutely wonderful.
The mammo was clear, although I had to have some more views taken because there was some tissue that was not compressed enough, so it looked suspicious. This has happened before, so I knew that was probably what it was, but as you all might guess, I was pretty scared anyway for a few minutes, until they came back and said that it was okay.
So that was good. However, my onc and I talked a long time about PBM. Based on my history, test results over time, etc., she thinks that this is a viable option for me now. I don't have to do it; I can choose to be followed closely as I have been, but things have changed enough for me that she now thinks that this is a legitimate option. I have tried everything else.
So that's where I am now. I've been thinking about this for quite some time, so it's not a new idea for me. But I still have lots of thinking to do. About the only thing I am sure of is that, if I do decide to do it, I don't want reconstruction. About 2 years ago, I visited a mastectomy boutique to see the bras, forms, etc., and that is the way I will go if I decide to have the surgery.
I'm working on some questions that I'll post here and in the high-risk area, to ask people how they came to the decision (either to do it or not). It may be a day or two before I get that posted, though, as today is pretty busy.
Thank you all for all the support you give me. You ladies are more help than you know!
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I'm so glad your mammo came back clear! I had to repeat one mammo on Apr 1st too because they didn't get enough tissue in the picture.
We'll be here anytime you want us, lucky32. Take just as much time as you need. Do all the research you need, get all the questions ready, and get all the questions answered by the people you want. It sounds like you are clear about reconstruction. As you know well, there is no right or wrong way. -
Great on the mammo. Like leaf said, you've got time to make this decision. While traveling last week I read a book titled: B.O.O.B.S., each chapter is written by someone with BC. It gives their path reports, and then they tell you what they experienced, and their thought prossesses in making decisions like this. Because the women each wrote their own story, you feel like your talking to the ladies here on the boards. I don't know if anyone else here has read it, but I found it informative as well as touching.
Several of the women had to make the same decision, and for me, I know no one else can make it for me, it helps to hear how others came to their decisions.
Good luck to you, and we are all here for you!
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lucky,
That is a tough decision and the only answer is the one you come to on your own. You have to listen to your gut. Good luck to you and please let us know how you are doing at all times.
mtbmom, where did you find that book?
Hugs to all LCIS sisters!
Kimber -
Kimber- I got it at my local B&N, but it's also available on Amazon. I find myself constant going back to it to help with ?s for my onc, or on my path report. Also, since it's 10 different women's stories, you can't help but find someone you can relate to.
Oh, and the title stands for A Bunch Of Outrageous Breast-cancer Survivors.
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Thank you so much, ladies.
mtbmom and Kimber, I have that book and have read it, although it's been a while. It is very good. After my diagnosis, I started a little collection of breast cancer books. Over the years, there have been times when I really needed to read and re-read them, and times when I didn't. Right now, I need to, so thanks for reminding me about that one.
I've discovered that if I see a BC book that looks interesting, it's best to go ahead and get it, because bookstores don't seem to keep anything but the old standbys on the shelves. It is easier to find them online now, though.
Leaf--nothing like "we need more views" to send the anxiety skyrocketing, right? Even though we know they're just being thorough, it's hard not to worry at least a little bit.
I've been meaning to ask you, how is your friend who is sick?
Have a good weekend, all.
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lucky- just want to wish you the best of luck. You know inside you'll ultimately make the decision that is best for you
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Thanks so much lucky. Don't want to hijack your thread either. Last Sun and Mon, she was alternating talking about Dr. Kevorkian /stopping chemo/rads (in other words comfort care only) and continuing chemo/rads every few hours. Since Tues, she hasn't talked about Dr. Kevorkian/stopping chemo/rads It is getting hard to tell if she is having trouble thinking correctly, or if she is undecided. (I'm sure my mind would be going around in circles if I was in her position.) I'll be taking her in for chemo/rads in a few minutes. I think she's cycling between fear of being abandoned, and fear of being trapped. (I'm sure I would be too.) Its just hard to help her because she doesn't want to talk about what she is feeling emotionally.
I got my OK from the doc to return to work April 11. I don't know if I will because they already have the schedule out through April 19. I'll almost certainly return to work full time by April 23.
I want my friend to have the dignity of dying in the way she wants. I just wish I could help her with her distress. I can try to be there as much as I can in case she ever does choose to talk about how she is feeling. Off to chemo/rads for her. -
Oh, leaf, you're not hijacking anything. Don't worry about that. I am sure that you are helping your friend tremendously just by being with her. I know what you mean about not being able to tell if she is thinking clearly. It's been my experience that it's sometimes hard to tell once people are that sick, and they can go back and forth. Do you know if any pain she may be having is under control?
She may not want to talk about it, but just your being there with her is a great comfort to her, I'm sure. She may fear being abandoned, but you are showing her every day that she isn't going to be. That speaks louder than words. I would guess that your calm presence is more soothing than anything.
Congrats on getting the OK to go back to work. Hope all goes well for you. Thanks so much for all you do for us here!
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