Finding balance

Oh, honey....I'm sorry.  

There really isn't any one answer as to how to do this.  Every person is different. 

My suggestion is to be sure to talk to her about the cancer. You aren't going to "remind" her that she has it.   She needs to know that you acknowledge that she has this disease, and that you acknowledge her. 

Once you talk to her, you can feel her out to see if she needs/wants you to be the positive one, or if she just needs you. 

Chances are, each day will be different.  She will probably need you to cry with her one day (probably the day her hair starts to come out from chemo....).  She will probably need you to make her smile that same day.  She will probably need to talk to you about her fears, and that is why it is so important that you let her know that she can.  

Hallmark has a great section of cards for breast cancer.  The cards put into words all the things that our loved ones can't seem to say after a diagnosis.  Check it out-

The best thing I can tell you is to just plain be there for her.  You will know what she needs from you.  Trust yourself.  

And please remember to have someone you can talk to about this too.  Cancer is hard for the patient, yes, but it is also hard for the family who watches it all take place. 

We just watched a bunch of family videos tonight, and it showed a nice little timeline of my own cancer journey.  I watched myself go from a normal housewife, to a very sick looking woman, to a woman on the mend.   I also watched my husband watch these things.  His eyes said it all-the fear, the sadness, the anguish.  He was remembering it all too clearly.  

Take care of yourself as well as your dear sister.  Please, invite her to come here, and you do the same-whenever you need support. 

The women here are amazing. 

Love and prayers, Deb