Jan 2008--Ain't it Great?

Just a quick shout-out to tomorrow's chemo-warriors!!! Go get ‘em LJ, Donna, TinaLee, and CarolC!!

Happy Birthday LWDana!!! Hope you have a fabulous day!

Julie

LJ:  I, too, am HER2+.  I have been reading some very good news on our front.  They are discovering more about what happens to trigger HER2+ cancers and also what causes it to metastasize.  They have more drugs coming out to help combat the "turning off" of HER2+ proteins, and may decide to add these drugs to early cancers with herceptin or instead of herceptin for stage 4s.  Don't ask my poor little chemo-brain to recall the names of the drugs, but I know I've heard of some of them.  I feel this is so promising that they are still finding out so much about our type of nasty cancer.  There is also a clinical trial starting examining the use of herceptin and tykerb together for early stage HER+ cancers.  Results should be out within 2-3 years.

CarolC:  I think we all have that fear of recurrence regardless of what stage or type of BC we have.  I don't think anyone was offended by your comments (I maybe speak for me-I wasn't).  It sucks that medicine unfortunately is a "gray" field, not with black-and-white answers.  There is never a 100% guarantee, as someone will always be the exception to the rules.  Keep you chin up and try to focus on the positives.

SIS Kimberly:  So sorry the fatigue is lasting longer for you-that seems to be the case for a lot of us. One foot in front of the other, and as you say... live in this moment.  I have to also say that reading your posts is just so uplifting (no pun intended to us BC girls!).  You have such a gift with words.  I am honored to know you and benefit from your insight.

Vettegal:  Thinking of you and your sister.  I hope her biopsy goes smoothly and the wait time for results is not too excruciatingly long for her.

Maz:  I am thinking of you as you have this extra stress in your life now to deal with.  Remember, you are only handed what God feels you can make it through. We are here for you.  You are a strong Jewel.  Hang in there.

Jenn51:  I, too, am a member of the "sausage club".  Hating that SEs as it also adds to the weight gain on top of the overall lack of beauty. My onc this week kinda blew it off as "just an expected SE"; he wasn't my usual.  So, even though I'm done with my TC now, I'll be asking my usual onc about how long he thinks it will last when I see him again in 3 weeks.  I can barely get my rings off by lunchtime, I think I'm just going to leave them off for now.

I picked up Deanna Favre's book from my cancer center's library.  I'll probably start reading it when I'm confined to the couch this weekend.  I looks good just from a quick skim of the excerpts.

And while reading about your ds Clay... my heart goes out to him (and you) and his difficulty/sorrow with your BC.  But I think the positive thing is that he does call you and verbalizes his feelings-that's huge!  I would encourage it, and maybe see if talking to someone like a counselor would also help him through this (can't hurt).

To everyone with thoughts of spring:  I went out and bought myself some tulips the others day: orange with red accents.  They look pretty and smell wonderful-what a pick-me-up!  Can't wait for some more warm weather.

Julie:  Glad you had a good day catching up with a former student.  You must've had such an impact on her for her to return years later to chat.

Carol:  Had a thought for you about planting.  I, too, am Type A and hate having someone else do things I love to do.  I forget what I had going on last year when it was time to plant, but couldn't do it.  So I bought the plants I wanted (one step), and then I literally laid the pods out exactly how and where I wanted them (step two, another day)-dh only had to dig the holes, plant the plant, and water them.  I even mixed up the fertilizer the way I like it done.  It was a huge relief for me to ahve some control but also be able to rest, and they turned out great.

To those watching shows:  I liked DWTS this week.  Girl faves: definitely Marisa and Kristi.  Watched AI's results last night and was so disappointed.  While I don't think Amanda would have made it all the way, I don't think she shoulda been next to go--shoulda been Kristy Lee.  And what was up with the Irish chick being bottom 3 (her name escapes me right now-chemobrain)??? She's the best girl overall--somebody got that one wrong!

Dana:  Clarify for me which day is your b-day... the 20^th or 21^st?  Have a great day whichever it is!!

Think I'm caught up now.  My extra benadryl yesterday gave me a good block of sleep last night.  Today I have my usual hot/cold feelings (I think it's the herceptin).  I also have flushed cheeks-maybe the extra decadron they gave me yesterday.  The pit/rock in my stomach is back--no real appetite today.  But really, not too bad overall.  I have to go get my last neulasta shot this afternoon.  I'm going to try to whip up some ricotta cheese brownies this morning to thank my great chemo nurses for getting me through so far.  My wonderful mom is coming down this morning too to stay until Monday.  GTG--need some food in the belly and refill on the drink.  Hope everyone has a good day, and GL to those getting tx today.

Happy Birthday Dana!!!!

I just wanted to let everyone know the I read Deanna Favre's book,

Don't Bet Agianst Me. I really enjoyed it and recommend it if you can get it. It helped me a lot.

Yesterday, I went to see the my bs. She is happy I am doing so well with healing. Also, my blood counts are still good after my third chemo tx. But, even with that good news I am still feeling depressed. I only have one more chemo, but I still will have to start rads in early May. It just seems so endless and I can't wait for my hair to grow back and feel normal again. Sorry to be such a downer on this first day of spring. Maybe I'll feel better and post a cheerier note later.

Joan

Thanks for the well wishes ladies.

Bloodwork for Tx#5 is good, so I'm heading out in about an hour. With 4 ACs and 4 T/H behind me, I'm right at the chemo halfway point. 8 more T/H's to go.

Happy Birthday Dana. You will be losing that hair. I'm down to about 1/2 my eyebrows and 1/3 of my lashes are left.  

Best to the other girls heading to the lounge today, and quick recovery from the SEs for the others. 

Hurray for Spring! This winter was a tough one for all of us. Here's to new beginnings.



My bff Val finally called me yesterday. It was so good to hear her voice after a few weeks of hospitals and being too sick to chat. She officially broke the news to me. They are going to start treatment on Monday, not sure if chemo, but she will be getting treatment, so thats good news. She sounded out of it and couldn't talk long, but I did what I could to lift her spirits.

Thanks to all who responded to my last post. I knew I brought it to the right place and I am so touched.

I am still grieveing for what she has to go through (and myself as well), and maybe I can help her through it, having a head start. And maybe she can teach me how to face the end with courage and dignity.



My chemotini went down easily yesterday. My onc addressed my Taxotere swelling by prescribing Lasix to take down my water weight, which he bames for me gaining 12 lbs. since starting chemo. He also extended my decadron another day before tapering off. Today I get my Neulasta shot. I take Zyrtec for my asthma and allergies everyday anyway and I've had no joint pain so far. I count my blessings, and hope I tolerate rads as well as all this.



Thanks again for all the thoughts and prayers for my friend Val. And for me. I don't know how I could face this alone. You guys give me strength. A shared load is easier to carry.



Thanks for the positive words, Dana, and Happy Birthday, too, LW!



Maz

Tina, hope your having sweet dreams, will be checking in after work. 

Happy 38th Birthday to our Lil Warrior Dana, I know with your positive spirit you'll be having a good one ...

We'll be checking back in after work, take care all,

Carol

Hello Jewels,

Just came back from the bar, took 6 ½ hrs today. That included a visit with my onc. Gave me pee pills for the swelling & after listening to what the MUGA tech said about the thing that was either missing or extra ordered a chest xray & contract CT fo the chest. I get them in 2 wks. & discuss w/him in 3. Gotta put it out of my mind until then but after today I'll be in such a fog it shouldn't be hard. Going to have to put Easter dinner in the hands of dh, dm & what ever sons show up. Luckily they are all very good in the kitchen. Better make the baskets tonight or later I may not have the energy. And that's something dh couldn't do. He'd just throw the stuff in & we all know it has to be arranged just so.

Carol, Tell your dh I'm in his camp with the mowing. I know it's hard to let go, I've been fighting it since this started. I'm getting better when my dh is in the kitchen & I hear strange noises. If I intrude too often he closes the door, then I do go crazy. But if you remember his eye situation, you can understand why I worry. But we do need to rest & let ourselves heal.

I'd heard earlier that Tylenol can be harmful if overdosed. You know how we all take 3 or 4 aspirin or Advil on occasion. After all prescription strength was for that many. But not Tylenol. Take as directed & you are OK, get in trouble if you pump up the dose. And like you I've been that's the only thing I can take during this year. Doesn't do much good, but better than nothing.

I'm sorry I didn't get the file sent off last night. My post was so long I was too pooped to think when I was done. It's coming this evening I promise.

Dana, I hope you don't take this the wrong way, but do you think this is the place to be telling us our docs don't' know sh*t? We have to trust someone these days. My onc is one of the best in the city & my surgeon just received the Susan B. Komen award. We can hope & pray for better results than have been predicted & praise God when we beat the odds, but as for me my doc's word is the best I can get from a mortal.

NO, this is my 4th out of 6. Sorry if I was confusing. I have chemo fingers these days. Thank goodness for spell checker. I bet I mis-spell something in every other sentence. And I have to go so slow. I used to be a power keyboarder.

To all with guys who can't look at the beautifulness of our baldness..... I was teasing one of the guys at work, big, strapppin' production foreman when my hair was falling out. Even chased him around the shop with a hunk of it. Then I found out his mom died of bc when he was pretty little & he was troubled by the memory of her going bald. I wanted to cry I felt so bad. Big hug & promise in his ear to never do it again & we were OK again. But I find he looks at me better when I have the wig on (Miss Kitty) than if I'm wearing just a scarf or bb cap. Maybe some of these guys can't face us bald because that is physical proof of our battle. Makes it too real to them. You know us gals are much tougher than the guys.

Vettegal, My prayers will be with you & your sister tomorrow.

KathyL, I saw my onc today & he gave me some diuretics (sp???). With taking the 1^st one of those + all the fluids in the chemotini I can hardly type a paragraph without taking a potty break. Hopefully by tomorrow I can get my wedding rings on again. I feel naked without them.

Thanks to everyone for your thoughts on ds Clay. I'm not going to push the therapist right now. Our family doc. up there is great & will stay on top of things. And Clay has known him since he was about 4^th grade & feels comfortable with him. I tried to encourage the boys to tell me everything when they were growing up. Succeeded with #1 & #3, Nick & Clay. Geno, the middle child is another story. Nick has his wife now so I don't hear as much of his problems but Clay & I are still very close. I hope he finds a way to come down for Easter.

Maz, I am so glad your bff called. I sure you will be good for each other & as I've learned here we all need someone to talk to. I will continue to pray for both of you.

Well, I feel the recliner calling me. And I have a file to send to Carol. I'll check in tomorrow if I can get back here to my room. I don't have a laptop. If I did I would never be off line. Got a new game for the Nintendo DS the boys got me for Christmas. Perfect timing. The stylus isn't too heavy.

  Happy Birthday Dana!

I seems we have so many Jewels with secondary problems our prayer circle keeps growing. We will make it & our loved ones will make it. We are Women, Hear Us Roar!

Prayers, love & hugs to all.

Jenn, I dont take it the wrong way - I work with Drs and I have seen Drs diagnose people with a short life span and they live many more years.  They really dont know when it is the last day until they are extremely terminal.  I also know that Drs care more greatly for people that have better insurance then others. I have seen Drs let people die in a room with another patient that they cant get along with or if they just want to die alone but because their insurance doesnt pay for a private room they dont grant that person their wishes, even when we have many vacant rooms.  I am not stating that ALL Drs are like that but there is many out there that dont have the right to predict what is in the future for you.  I think a Dr should say Pray, be positive and hope for the best - but not tell you, you have so many years left.  If I look online with my Cancer I shouldnt beat Cancer the odds are not good but it IS GOD THAT HAS THE LAST DECISION.  I think being positive and claiming you are healed has a lot to do with it besides God decisions.  So I have the right to my opinion as everyone as does.  If you want to be quite frank my Dr thinks I am going to die from my Liver Cancer - get that!  I dont claim it, I dont believe it and I know I will beat it.  I dont go by stastics, Dr's or Nurses - they are ONLY CERTIFIED BY THE BOARD not by GOD.  I know many people that have beat Cancer in the Lungs and they are still going each and every day and the Dr told her she wouldnt see past a year and HELLO she is living on three years later and he is dumbfounded.  So no I dont take offense to your opinion but not everyone has a Dr that gives you hope, compassion, and strength!

I am happy you have a wonderful Dr, it makes it all the better! For me, I call on my Lord to save me, and to give the Drs the knowledge then need to heal me.  One more thing Sweet Pea, if your Dr gives you hopes, dreams and promises - then he is wonderful because I rather have a Dr on my side then to tell me I only have so many years left - yours sounds like a wonderful one.  God blessed you!!!!! 

Hi Jewels, well most of you are snuggly tucked in by this time, we're still watching college hoops, our friends whom we're traveling with this weekend had us fill in our picks on the games, we'll see who guessed the best over the next couple of weeks.

Kathy, hope you got the chance to make those brownies for the staff at your onc center, my mil has brought some of her great cookies to my center, you know they appreciate it. 

I also will take your idea towards my spring plantings into "consideration"!  Its actually a great idea, I won't let the dh be in charge of the fertilizer though, he prepped a large bed in the front yard a few years back, used way to much fertilizer, literally burn't up my plantings within about a week.  That was a hard one to neutralize, and needless to say the last time he helped me with the spring plantings!

Going to read Deanna Favre's book as well this week while on vacation.

I hope that your se's stay at bay as much as possible for you to enjoy your Easter weekend.  I remember how much fun we had when my son was a little guy hunting for eggs, I'm sure your kids will be stoked as well for the Easter bunny's arrival!

Joan, hate to say it but there are quite a few of us with alot more txts to do, including rads and hormone therapies.  I try to remember that even though this period in time seems to be lasting forever, we will get through the short term "now",  and be that much better off in the long run.  Hang in there gal, we're in this together.

Deb, lets hope that your scrip for nerve pain does the trick sooner than later.  Its so surprising to me that most of the se's have been leaning towards, bone and nerve aches.  Prior to this journey beginning if you we're to say chemo the first word that would come into my mind would be "throwing up".  Okay, Julie you probably would take the award for that though, sorry!

LJ, here's to hoping that your se's stay at bay over the next few days, and a whooohoooo for being at your half way point.  Had to post atleast one "whooooohooooo" since Kimberly is mia today.

Kimberly, hoping that your busy being busy and not down for the count today. 

Julie, lets call it a slight addiction ... actually I was getting a little concerned as to what sites the gov considers appropriate or not, last thing I need is to have the "IT Authorities" restricting my access.  And yeah, I do like to see whats happening during the day.  Kinda keeps me connected in a strange sort of way.  I don't spend really any time at work chatting about bc, so I'm not on overload in that dept.

The dh is getting into AI, I end up going to bed most the time, he says that Carly rocks!

Maz, I'm sure glad that you had the chance to talk with your bf today.  I'm sure that just hearing your voice lifted Val's spirits more than she may have been able to share with you.  Best friends are such a gift.

Jenn, thanks for the file, and I got a chuckle in regards to your dh in the kitchen.  I have definitely relinquished the dish duty in the eve.  Although it takes my dh forever to clean up the kitchen, I know that when I come back downstairs in the morning he will have it all spruced up from the night before.  I've been so lucky, he has pretty much done them since surgery number one in Nov.  I'm politely told to get out of "the galley" after dinner.  Gotta love um!

My ears perked up the other day, was watching tivo'd Regis and Kelly and they we're talking about a winner of their trivia contest, the gal was from McCordsville.  Who'd thunk I would ever have a clue about McCordsville, I guess I still don't have a clue, but I thought about how I'm so much more in tune with whats happening all over our country, ie weather, tragedies etc.  Its becoming a small world after all!

Cathy, I'll be smelling the blooms in about 40 hours, not that I'm counting!  I couldn't imagine how cool it would be to have them in my backyard.  In my next life, I'm going to live where its warm year round!

Vettegal, thinking of your family, all the best for your sister tomorrow. 

Dana, good luck with number three tomorrow, you seem to be breezin' right along!

Working a half day tomorrow, then I'll be on "cation", our friends little one used to call vacation "cation" so it kinda stuck. 

Night all,  Carol

Hi Gems,

Happy Spring to everyone. Sorry it's been a few days. I was very depressed yesterday, did manage to do housework and take a walk. Today we are getting 4 to 8 inches of snow. I'm also getting my bone scan results today. I hope everyone is well and I promise this weekend to get caught up and give some shout outs. I hope everyone is ready for the Easter Bunny.

Kimberly and Carol I also like your quotes too. We never know where this journey of life is going to take us.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DANA!!!!! (((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))

Sheshe

Joteach:  We've all seemed to hit a snag/experience some depressing thoughts along this journey.  A lot of us had a hard time after the third round, too, for some reason.  Hang in there.  Remember it's ok and normal, just don't let the feelings drag you down too far or for too long without getting them addressed.

Deb102307:  I personally despise the taxotere!  I think most of my SEs stem from it.  I can't wait for them to start going away for good now that I'm done-but I know it could take a while, unfortunately.

Maz:  Happy that you and your bff got to talk finally.  And I'll keep in mind about asking for a diuretic of this swelling gets worse for me.  I'm up 7 pounds now (yuk!), and I really think most of it is fluid retention.  I see Jenn51 has had the same problem and got some help to pee all the fluid off, too.

Cathy-CA:  Those brownies I made are to die for if I must say so myself.  They smelled great while cooking, but there's no way I could eat them right now-choc. just tastes so bad; it's a shame b/c it's almost my 5^th food group usually.  The nurses loved them though, so that made me happy that someone was enjoying them!  One girl said they were so good, they made her swear!  Hahaha!  I'd be happy to share the recipe with anyone who wants it.

And your story about your teacher was just so sad.  I'm sorry.  I think it would've made you cry even without all the BC emotions bopping around in your head.  I hope she is at peace now.

Vettegal:  Glad your mom got good news on her BC shrinking.  I hope it keeps heading in that direction for her.

OK girls, I am caught up.  Today's not too bad yet.  Just kinda tired.  The stomach's not real happy but no debilitating nausea.  I've got most of my Easter stuff done, so I really can just sit back and let it all happen around me.  Happy Easter to all who celebrate it.  I'll be checking in as I can this weekend.

Good Morning Jewels,
Sorry I was MIA yesterday.  I just needed a day off the computer doing something not cancer related.  I read a book called Best Friends cover to cover.  My energy is slowing returning, and other than that, the new development is my bottom lip is swollen with a lovely 'chemo' sore, and I can't open my mouth very wide. A spoonful of oatmeal if too full can be problematic.  GEEEZZZZ!!!!!  This last tx kicked my butt and good.  Today, I finally have the energy to do a few errands ( I have been in this house, although I've been out to the backyard to sit in the fresh air, for 9 days).... and oh... I know.... people will take a double take, ..."Is that who I think it is...is that Angelina Jolie?"  HaHaHa  The dh calls my bottom lip my Angelina Jolie lip.

Vettegal- LOL on hiring a hit man to take out Aunt Flo. I had visions of the scene with all the munchkins in OZ singing The Wicked Witch Is Dead, but it was all of us singing, “WhooHoo Aunt Flo is gone.”     OK, for some,but not others.  I have not had a period since February, and I should have started this week, but I’m not holding my breath ‘cause we all know Aunt Flo can be cantankerous. Glad you were able to get some real sleep the other night. Rejuvinating.

I love tulips…and your dh’s senitimentality....(sigh).

CHJ- You’re welcome.  I’m glad you’re feeling shinier…and how can one help it with daffodils coming up?

Jenn- Hoping you’re doing well after your tx. Your youngest son, Clay, reminds me of my Jon.  He’s always calling to check in on me and to tell me he loves too.  He has experienced a lot of death in his life (my mom, his great grandparents, his uncle, his beloved cat, and a good friend of his) so I can’t imagine that the thought of losing me hasn’t crossed his mind. He tells me that he shares my story with his classmates when they are complaining about stuff, and then he tells me how impressed they are with my positive outlook.  Telling my story seems to help him cope.

Hope those baskets got put together ‘just so’.

Carol- I’ll be thinking of you in sunny Arizona playing golf, laughing with friends, drinking a little something fun, and meeting your CMF gal.  Have a great time…you deserve it!!!!!

About the Wendi book. I got it, but I can’t read it right now.  I’m really burnt out on bc stuff. As a matter of fact, I had to take all the books off the table that were staring at me waiting for me to read them…pick me pick me…just kidding, they weren’t talking to me, but it just felt overwhelming to have all those books piled there.  So now I have a few and it feel better.  I read one yesterday about best friends who met in college in the 70’s. It was pretty good.

Glad the ole noggin wasn’t too badly injured.  I’m sure the ‘nut’ will be gone before your trip.

I’ve decided that I’ll have my doc do the estrogen level test every three or four months once I’m done with chemo to see if my levels are going down on their own.  If they go down to a level docs are happy with, I may not feel the urgency to remove the ovaries.  If they don’t, then I’ll do that for sure.  I don’t want to do any unneeded surgeries if I don’t have to put myself through it.

LWDana- Wow, when you’re feeling strongly about something, you feel strongly about it…felt like what I imagine those “Hail, Fire, and Brimstone” revivals to be like.  I’m glad that your faith gives you comfort and strength, but respectfully disagree with the statement ‘Dr’s don’t know s#&t’.   Certainly, they don’t know everything, as that would be impossible, but they do the best they can for their patients…at least most do in my opinion. If you’re not happy with your doctor, you do have the right to change doctors, but it’s not him that you don’t like, it’s that he’s not telling you what you want to hear or believe (in his view, he’s being realistic and trying to give you the reality of the uphill battle you face, which doesn’t mean you’ll not make it to the top, just that it will be hard).  I’m not saying you have to blindly follow everything your doctor says, you know me, I’m all about being well informed, but I don’t think a general statement like ‘Doctors don’t know s$&t’ is accurate.

Your views expressed to Jenn about doctors and nurses only being certified by the board and not by God were a little surprising considering the fact you want to be a nurse so badly. It sounds like you’re letting go of a lot of anger right now, LWDana, so take a deep breath and be aware.

Whew, one minute really on the rant and the next buying donuts and happy her hair is falling out.  Yep, she’s on the emotional roller coaster.  Hang on Dana!!!!!

Hope your classmates enjoyed their donuts and hope your birthday was filled joy.

Paula- You are one dedicated lady, Paula.  I admire that you give your kids so much of your time, and that they appreciate it. 

Julie- Love that graphic.  How do you find that stuff? 

CarolC- Here’s to a light fog on your last tx!!!! You’re done!!!!
WhooHoo!!!!

Kathy- Thanks for your kind words. It gives me pleasure to know that my words can be uplifiting. I will be putting one foot in front of the other today for sure. I’ve got to get a few errands run for the adult kids Easter Egg hunt.  Glad you’re not too down yet…good thing you’ve got all those errands done last week for Easter and sounds like the flower bed, too.  Glad you’re Mom will be there to help you out this weekend.
 
You’re done with chemo!!!! WhooHoo!!!  And that recipe sounds like it needs to be posted.

Speaking of WhooHoo, has anyone noticed that I must have inspired Washington Mutual with my WhooHoo?  They did, it is in their newest commercial.

Joan- Hey blue jewel, nothing wrong with being down at the thought of one more chemo and then radiation. It seems like such a long dark tunnel with a pinpoint of light at the end, but if you think about it…three months has already passed since January. Can you believe it? (((HUGS)))

Hey Deb- Sorry to hear that you’re having neuropathy issues with your feet. That is one that I haven’t had the pleasure to meet, and hopefully don’t run into over the course of my last two txs.  Glad you’ll have some relief soon with the meds.  A new season for the Jewels…nice!

LJ13- Good luck at the lounge today.  ½ way there!!!!!

Maz- I’m so glad all went well with your tx and that you had a chance to talk to your bff.  Wow, you sound great today, and I love your resolve to help her through treatment since you’re the ‘veteran’ and to learn how to face the end with courage and dignity from her…what a gift for you both!

Tinalee- You cracked me up….I feel a droolfest (nap) coming on.
Hope the tx infusion goes well and that you have an se-light weekend.

CathyCa- Oh, I’m so sorry to hear of the loss of your cooking instructor.  What a life she made for herself. What a testament to survival she was!!!!

SheShe- Glad you were able to get outside for a walk…and I know waiting for test results sucks.  Try to put it out of your mind and concentrate on the fact that it’s spring!!!! WhooHoo!!! You’ve got a wedding coming up soon.

OK, I’m all caught up. Enjoy your Friday everyone.

Love to all,
SIS Kimberly

Sista, I'm doing Taxol weekly (similar to Taxotere) and I don't have any pain or burning. Fluid retention, I got, but it's just in my feet, ankles, and a bit in my calves. For me it started right after the second Tx. Doc said that exercise helps, cut down the salt, raise the feet whenever possible, possibly try compression socks. If it was still bad or worse, he'd prescribe Lasix. I'm trying to avoid that, and doing pretty well so far.

Only SE I'm having other than that is some mild constipation right after Tx, and my red blood cell count has gone low. And losing what little body hair AC didn't take out.

Gosh Ladies - when I made that statement Drs dont know sh*t really hit home.  I seen my Mom die because the Drs didnt want to make more of a effort - I seen her bed sores so big you can put your fist into the hole, I seen my brother suffer as well.  It was just MY experience, MY opinion!  Yes, I will be a nurse - a very compassionate, caring nursing that is going to go above and beyond for people because I believe everyone deserves a good chance and a bright out look on life! I would never tell anyone that you have 2 years left, because in 2 years you might be healed, you might die.  Its all in Gods hands!  I am going to be a Nurse and I am there to help people and try to make them better but its through God all things are possible that is what I was saying. Yes, Dr and Nurses are educated but they dont know when someones calling is especially when they predict years away.  I have a new found friend that was diagnosed last year to pass away within 3 months and here she is 1 1/2 years later and for ME my Opinion when they tell you that they give you little hope!  That is just my Opinion, I am so sorry if I offended anyone.  I am not on a roller coaster - I was very mad at my classmates for not appreciating me or acknowledging my opinion on what food I choose to eat but on my Bday I read my scripture and it stated you are Right but the way you went about is was wrong so I wanted to turn the other cheek.  I do have a thin line between love and hate and I am human, I got that from my Mom being so loving and then I got the anger from my dad (when i was abused).  I never bring out the anger until someone close to me pushes me that way, and still after that I dont like who I have become! I am growing still - look at how long it took me to mature and get rid of my negative ways, and to get an education. 

I didnt grow up like most! I was on the streets at 12 years old do whatever means possible to survive. I grow up with gang members whom I thought cared about me because i was too afraid to go home to my father.   I will not go into details all that I seen and been through but I have been through hell and back and now I am in peace and walking with God. I do apologize if I offended anyone regarding my statement.  I wish I could take it back, because I didnt want it to come across as if you Doctors dont know anything because they do, it just hurts me to hear Drs that give you little hope that is all I was saying - TO ME GOD IS IN CHARGE OF YOUR LIFE.   That is all I was saying and I will make sure I am more careful with what words I use.  The funny part the message was for Maz, and she thanked me but others found it strange or offensive.  I am not a hurtful person and I sincererly apologize to ANYONE that took it the wrong way. 

Have a blessed day, and once again Jenn and Kim and ANYONE else I offended I do apologize.

Dana 

Its me the again - the hard pill to swallow - he ha

Vettegal, I am so happy to hear your Mothers cancer is shrinking! All glory to God and the Doctors -   I am continuing to pray for you and your family and your sister.  I will be in church tomorrow and again I will put you and so many others on my list for prayers.  You know the more the prayers the merrier! 

God bless and love you ladies!  You guys can rename me the hard pill to swallow instead of Lil Warrior even though that name fits me too.  he ha..

I had my three chemo - so far so good!  I am just so blessed to have little se and I thank him each and every day and I continue to pray for you ladies that are having problems with the se's.  

Have a Happy, Happy, Happy Easter!!!!