An OPEN letter to KATIE6
Comments
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Dear katie 6,
If I could go back to that very day when there were words exchanged between us on the political thread, and I sent you that PM asking you to leave me alone, I would.
Maybe I should've contacted you months earlier when you singled me out in the march on washington thread. Maybe if I had said something to you then, things would be different.
I am having trouble expressing in words how I feel about you contacting the organization that I work for. Your motives were cruel and unwarranted, no matter how you spin it.
I have heard your reasoning and your side of the story as you have stated it privately to other members on this site. And let me tell you this,
I'M NOT BUYING IT.
If you are upset about being ostracized from this community, it is no ones fault other than your own. You were the one who chose to twist my private PM to you, and make it public, stirring up controversy. You were the one who forwarded that PM, (not including any of your responses to me) to several board members.
You have been a member for almost 2 years, with less than 40 posts, and some of them are in threads that are heated. From the political threads, to your harsh words in the bimmer threads, being a member of the boards it's your right to state your opinion. Even if I disagreed with everything you've ever written, I could NEVER imagine phoning your place of employment.
I learned a big lesson from this. That if I am to represent my organization, even in an automatic signature, my words have to be chosen wisely. However, I will not allow, one mean spirited person, to take away from everything that I've done in this community that is positive.
I agonized for a week over deleting posts, changing my identity, my photo, signature, bio's etc... trying to figure out a way that I could continue to post, while representing the best interest of my company.
And for what? All because you have such a blatant disregard for me, that you do something that was really so low...
Well, guess what?
I've talked it over with my bosses.
I'm not leaving these boards.
I'm not walking away from my sisters, who gave me strength when I had none, who talked my down from every ledge, and have stood by me through all the good and bad times in the last 4 years of my life.
I refuse to let your antics take away from my personal support, my friendships that I hold so dear, and the chance that I have to help women every day on those boards... whether they need a laugh, education about reconstruction, or makeup and fashion tips.
I have learned an important business lesson, and I guess I should be thankful for that.
I truly hope you take accountability for what you did, and the repercussions it has had on my career and within this community.
I am so disappointed, that one sister could do this to another. I really think if you had only taken the time to talk to me, and get to know me, things would have been different.
To everyone else-- I'm still figuring out if I have to start over under a new name, and still working on getting my auto signatures removed from every post in the last year, but I am here to stay.
I'm sorry that the community was dragged through this entire ordeal from start to finish, but I'm really thankful that so many of you supported me, and always have my best interest at heart.
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Beth, welcome back!
We love you and need you here. You are an advocate of women who get this disease at an early age (20's) and those young ladies who find these boards will need you to look to for guidance on how to live a full life inspite of this horrible disease.
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Beth,
This letter just gave me chills! Very well said!! The only thing I would change...is the fact that you called her "sister". A true sister, who is struggling with the same thing all of us here are struggling with...would NOT DO WHAT SHE DID! It's horrible!! So...sister..she is not.
Welcome back!!! You have made my day!!!
Woohoo.......Beth is back!!
You go girl...I think you made a good decision..and I am glad your bosses are supporting your decision!
xoxo
Lisa
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Congratulations bethny... this letter has taken great courage. I admire your tenacity and candor...many people could learn from you. You are a well respected sister on bc. org and have been a wonderful, loving and knowlegable support for many on the boards and chat.
I am so happy that you have decided to continue with your involvement in this community. Your leaving would be a serious loss.
I am not familiar with this person who has caused such negative dissention and posed a grave disservice but am concerned that this person's jealousy of you has caused you such pain. I feel for this person... since jealousy is called the 'green-eyed monster' that you are not the only person she has tried to discredit. I hope and pray that wherever and whoever Katie6 is that she seek professional help since her actions have indicated a severe inner conflict.
Take care beth and you are forever in my heart.
hi5
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Beth, sweetie, I am so glad that you talked to your bosses. This site is not the end all for any of us but it has helped us keep our sanity, helped us realize we aren't alone and frankly, I don't know how I could have kept it together without my Rocktober girls. This site offers all women with bc a place to talk out their fears and start rebuilding their lives or learning how to face this disease with dignity and sanity.
I am glad that you can stay and offer your experience to the women of this board and the young women who are still coming in ..... sadly.
I agree with Lisa, I wouldn't call this person a sister. It was mean and evil intended. How sad to think she thinks she was the victor in that match when in the scheme of things, she lost BIG TIME. We aren't the judges but we will all face one ..... and I don't think that actions like that put "gold stars" in your book.
Our pastor asked to think about things this way: if G*d was standing next to you, would do that? Who in their right mind would think He would approve of maliciously maligning someone's reputation and career for the sake of an argument?
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to borrow a phrase....
live strong...
thank you for sticking around, you have always been an inspiration to me and many other sisters here...
it saddens me to think that a sister would go so far as to contact your employer...
life is way to short...
anyway beth....good to know you are here!
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BRAVO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Thanks for having the courage to stay!!
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Beth you are now MY HERO!!! I've been wondering about this it's happened to two other women on this site. I'm so glad your staying and we need you on this site, your knowledge, stories, make up hints, all of it. I'm so glad your staying. This site is a sisterhood and we should treat each other kindly, I'm very saddened that this happened to you and some other women. You are the best Beth.
Big FAT hugs! Pearl
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Well said, Beth. I am so glad you decided to stay. Keep playing to win!!!!
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Love you Beth. So happy you have worked this mess out w/ your employer. You are to valuable to all of us oldies and newbies here.
Lexi
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Beth, I can't say I really know you but wow....that took alot of guts! Bravo! The person that should be in hiding or gone is the one that caused such grief!!! Good grief...what's wrong with people who can do that!
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Well I missed what was said but according to all the comments you must have done a great job Beth.
Amy
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and just the fact that the post was removed, leads me to believe that katie6 has multiple screen names, b/c I can't imagine anyone removing my post that called her out for calling my bosses...
hmmmmm
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I just noticed that your post was removed and wondered how that happened it was a good post and there was no reason to remove it. Your right she must have multiple screen names. Weird and cowardly. Pearl
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In less than 45 minutes, no less!!! I don't think we get rid of spammers that quickly. Perhaps this is why so many non-offensive posts have been deleted lately causing great angst. I wonder if the mods can check for multiple screen names from an individual user?
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Oh, I go away for a couple of hours and I miss everything. I sure wish I had seen what you had to say but I'm not surprised at who it was.
Is it true you are back? That's wonderful!
Tina
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Welcome back..I missed the letter
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Abadoodles and Emelee...go to the thread...No security on this site...you can read Beth's letter there!! Hurry, before it is removed!! Why was it removed?? I see no reason!!
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Do we need another button that says "please restore this comment" ????
Like 100 "please restores" can override 5 "please deletes"??!!Oh well, sounds like some interactive video game -- which is exactly what we AREN'T -- except perhaps to a few people, or a few personas of one person...
I do think the automatic deletion after 5 requests is temporary, and the moderators are supposed to review the post and have the capacity to reinstate?
In any case,
(((Beth))) -- I'm so glad to see you here!
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for all those that missed it.....here is the letter that was deleted. I see no reason for that whatsoever. Please..moderators...why do you feel the need to delete her explanation?? There was nothing harmful in it. Is it the truth that you are deleting?? I am totally confused.
Open letter to katie6
If I could go back to that very day when there were words exchanged between us on the political thread, and I sent you that PM asking you to leave me alone, I would.
Maybe I should've contacted you months earlier when you singled me out in the march on washington thread. Maybe if I had said something to you then, things would be different.
I am having trouble expressing in words how I feel about you contacting the organization that I work for. Your motives were cruel and unwarranted, no matter how you spin it.
I have heard your reasoning and your side of the story as you have stated it privately to other members on this site. And let me tell you this,
I'M NOT BUYING IT.
If you are upset about being ostracized from this community, it is no ones fault other than your own. You were the one who chose to twist my private PM to you, and make it public, stirring up controversy. You were the one who forwarded that PM, (not including any of your responses to me) to several board members.
You have been a member for almost 2 years, with less than 50 posts, and some of them are in threads that are heated. From the political threads, to your harsh words in the bimmer threads, being a member of the boards it's your right to state your opinion. Even if I disagreed with everything you've ever written, I could NEVER imagine phoning your place of employment.
I learned a big lesson from this. That if I am to represent my organization, even in an automatic signature, my words have to be chosen wisely. However, I will not allow, one mean spirited person, to take away from everything that I've done in this community that is positive.
I agonized for a week over deleting posts, changing my identity, my photo, signature, bio's etc... trying to figure out a way that I could continue to post, while representing the best interest of my company.
And for what? All because you have such a blatant disregard for me, that you do something that was really so low...
Well, guess what?
I've talked it over with my bosses.
I'm not leaving these boards.
I'm not walking away from my sisters, who gave me strength when I had none, who talked my down from every ledge, and have stood by me through all the good and bad times in the last 3 years of my life.
I refuse to let your antics take away from my personal support, my friendships that I hold so dear, and the chance that I have to help women every day on those boards... whether they need a laugh, education about reconstruction, or makeup and fashion tips.
I have learned an important business lesson, and I guess I should be thankful for that.
I truly hope you take accountability for what you did, and the repercussions it has had on my career and within this community.
I am so disappointed, that one sister could do this to another. I really think if you had only taken the time to talk to me, and get to know me, things would have been different.
To everyone else-- I'm still figuring out if I have to start over under a new name, and still working on getting my auto signatures removed from every post in the last year, but I am here to stay.
I'm sorry that the community was dragged through this entire ordeal from start to finish, but I'm really thankful that so many of you supported me, and always have my best interest at heart.
don't be mad at Beth for posting a truthful explanation!
Sorry Beth...I wanted to make this available for the ones that missed it.
xoxo
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Beth - I am SO thrilled to have you back! I am angry that you have had the anxiety of the last few weeks to deal with - but obviously you have overcome all that and returned to us as strong as ever.
We need you here!
Love ya, grrl!
Lisa
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Rant Alert:
Ok, what is up with the moderation as of late? Was the whole goal of the changeover to a new board to make it better or to make it so the moderators only have to check in once a month or so? "Offensive" posts now get deleted in minutes but requests to get something changed, added or moved take weeks or more? Several people have offered assistance with doing away with spammers and trolls and even moderating, but it seems to all fall on death ears. What the heck is up with that?!?
More to the point, I'm glad you are staying, Bethany
. The boards are a much better place with you on them - lax moderation not withstanding...And thanks, my3girls, for posting Beth's letter for those of us who arrived after the thought police logged on and had it removed...
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Yey!!! Beth is back!!!
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Beth, you go girl!!!!!! So glad you'll be around for all of us.
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Wow! I'm on the boards all the time and missed all this! Anyway, I am glad it is settled and you are staying with us! I like reading your posts!
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Beth,
You are one of the most helpful people here so I am very happy to see you stay.
You are also very much loved and respected.
XOXO
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Beth, so glad you have decided to stay.
Your help to the younger members of this board is incalculable, you are NEEDED here.
Isabella.
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my3girls, there's no link now that I can see? I'd have loved to have seen Beth's letter....
I so dislike censorship...
Beth, good for you for standing up for yourself!
I agree with the "restore this post" button....lol....
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I read Beth's letter, it was not at all offensive. It was well written, honest, and fair. I don't know this Katie6.
Why was it censored? Please. Big brother, some times we need to let posts stay to clear the air.
Janis
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Beth, I'm glad to see you've reconsidered and decided to stay. I'm especially glad to know that your employer is not disparaging you based on what some discontented person has conveyed about you. There will always be a naysayer anytime a person steps into the arena and makes her voice heard.
Now what concerns me is the way the 'report this comment' feature is being used.
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