coping with the loss of a buddy

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earhart
earhart Member Posts: 3
edited June 2014 in Bonded by Breast Cancer
coping with the loss of a buddy
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  • earhart
    earhart Member Posts: 3
    edited March 2008

    Just joined this site... and don't know if someone out there has had this happen, but I'm a survivor of 11 years and just found out a friend who was also a survivor just passed away from metastatic disease.  How do you cope?

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  • Desny
    Desny Member Posts: 371
    edited March 2008

    Dear Earheart,

    I am sorry for the loss of your friend,  I have lost many friends over the years.  Yes, One childhood friend from bc some 18 years before I was dx.  I still remember the pain and disbelief of her passing.  When I could adjust better, I relized that she was at peace and it helped to ease my pain. 

    Wishing you peace.

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  • NaughtybyNature
    NaughtybyNature Member Posts: 1,448
    edited March 2008

    earhart:

    I am very sorry about your loss.  We have lost so many girls-friends/sisters here.

    I too have just lost a girlfriend to an aneurysm, chemo induced; she had BC about 3 years ago; the lumpectomy was a batch job and she had to go under the knife again; she had chemo w/ my oncologist and the "potion" she was under damaged her heart; she saw a cardiologist, she had a stroke, recovered, but for some reason, she just "went" this past 2/22/08.  She was only 53 and she leaves a teenage daughter behind, besides other relatives.

    How do you cope you ask... by remembering her smile, our conversations, her hair, her laugh, her supportive ways,... you remember her/him and all he or she stand for in this life.  You remember how lucky we were to have had the honor to meet this person.

    Celebrate their life, plant a flower or a tree, and think that even thou very premature, it was time for them to go.

    Don't hesitate to cry, yell, be mad, frustrated, sad... most of all remember them alive and well, engrave that in your memories and heart.  Save those for the rest of your life.

    Hugs,

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  • earhart
    earhart Member Posts: 3
    edited March 2008

    Thanks for the comforting words.  She is the reason why I dealt with my diagnosis so easily and now I feel like I've got to repay her by doing the same for others.  That's how I'll cope - that's how I'll honor her memory.

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