So Many Changes!

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Anonymous
Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
edited June 2014 in Life After Breast Cancer
So Many Changes!
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  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited January 2008

    Not sure how to begin this but I have just separated from my husband after 20 years of marriage.

    My hubby has been wonderful and has never said an unkind word to  me in 20 years. He is generous, funny and a wonderful supporter but the past 5 years since being dx has been a rollercoaster and I have changed so much.

    I finished the long road with my therapist and my out look on life and what I want out of it is so different that I find every aspect of my life going in a different direction.

    With the loss of Stacey and my brother, I have realized that life too short to not make it the best that I can. I discovered that even though my hubby will always be special to me I am no longer in love and it is time to move on.

    Time for a change that will allow me to re-discover who I am and what is important to me. I am new to the world of being single. I went from my parents home to my husbands home and living on my own will be a new adventure for me.

    So here is to new changes and new adventures in life. It is time to let all those heartache find some peace in my heart.

    Here is a BIG thank you to all of you who have supported, cared and loved me. For without you I might not have discovered what my heart has been trying to tell me all along: that life goes on and can be good....

    always, Pepper

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  • iodine
    iodine Member Posts: 4,289
    edited January 2008

    Hey, Babe, bet it took a lot of courage to make the decision to become single.  Hugs to you and here's to changes and new adventures.

    Love you and only wish happiness and peace---ok, lots fun, too.

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  • celia088
    celia088 Member Posts: 2,570
    edited January 2008

    Pepper, you have made a truly difficult and courageous decision for your life.  I wish you the best of everything in your new journey toward self-discovery.  Good luck to you!!!!!

    celia 

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  • Fitztwins
    Fitztwins Member Posts: 7,969
    edited January 2008

    Holy crap!! Good for you. Yes, life is WAY to short to be unhappy.

    I wish you the best in your new life!!

    Janis

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  • djd
    djd Member Posts: 866
    edited January 2008

    Pepper,

    I was married for ten years to my high school sweetheart.  We have been divorced for 12 years and we still stay in touch.  He has a new wife and a baby and I think we are both much happier than we would have been if we stayed together.

    Good luck in your journey as a single woman - it takes some getting used to!   I really love where I am in my life, my freedom and independence  -- I don't see myself ever getting married again.

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  • saluki
    saluki Member Posts: 2,287
    edited January 2008

    You have my admiration--Very courageous move.

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  • AnneW
    AnneW Member Posts: 4,050
    edited January 2008

    Pepper, dear one, you have taken an amazing first step in the rest of your life. I know how much angst this decision must have caused you--facing another loss on top of what you've already seen. But I believe you also see what you can gain--YOU. Finding yourself and your purpose is a priceless process that many of us never really achieve.

    You have my utmost respect and support.

    Love,

    Anne

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  • Jaybird627
    Jaybird627 Member Posts: 2,144
    edited January 2008

    Pepper, go out and enjoy your life - I wish you all the best!

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  • tawyna1
    tawyna1 Member Posts: 273
    edited January 2008

    hi pepper,

    cheers to changes in life.

    i hope you have so much fun and joy in life.

    the future holds so much for you.

    hugs to you.. 

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  • NaughtybyNature
    NaughtybyNature Member Posts: 1,448
    edited January 2008

    "Pepparu": I am really shocked to read this here, instead of hearing it from your mouth! 

    Nevertheless... I really don't know what to say... since I met you, your hubby and son.  May be a separate "vacation" is good for both of you since you all have endured so much. 

    Whatever both of you decide, I w/ back you both up.  More so you because as a woman I have been there and done that one year and change after my "encounter" w/ BC.

    I guess I w/ be talking to you via private e-mail.  Later,

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  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited January 2008

    Thanks for your support. I knew that  I could count on my fellow "sisters" to give me encouragement.

    I will need it for the long journey that is ahead of me.

    Hugs to all,

    Pepper

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  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited January 2008

    Holy crap, Pepper, I don't know how I missed this thread! Sweetie...welcome to the single world! I promise that you'll love it, despite it's demanding lotsa courage and self awareness in order for it to be fruitful and liberating.

    I too went from my father's home to my husband's and stayed married for 28 years, so I know how scary it is to leave that safety. But something in us eventually itches to be heard and won't give us peace until we answer its call. Cancer just makes it louder and more urgent, huh?

    So I say, my chica, congratulations on making the hard decision to allow yourself the freedom and the room to break out and give birth to your very self. I can't wait to know her!

    ~Marin

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  • PuppyFive
    PuppyFive Member Posts: 2,808
    edited January 2008

    {{{PEPPER}}}

    I too have just found Your post!

    I have always thought of You as a very Strong, Loving, Sister

    that would always be there for one of Us!!! I hope and Pray we can Only return the Love!

    Remember Pepper, this is very well used, BUT in my life so true

    "Life is like a box of choclates Pepper, You never know what Your gonna get" I hope, what ever You Decide, You will be the Reason for It!!

    xoxoxo Puppy(DebbyFive)

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  • DebbieB
    DebbieB Member Posts: 161
    edited February 2008

    Pepper,

    I admire your courage and decision to choose new roads in your life.  I hope these roads bring you joy and happiness.  And if this road doesn't take you where you want to go, then you can always take another road.

    Good luck!

    Debbie

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  • KariLynn
    KariLynn Member Posts: 1,079
    edited February 2008

    Pepper,

    Best wishes for your future!  I hope you are able to build the life you want and deserve and can make some dreams come true.

    Kari

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  • junie
    junie Member Posts: 1,216
    edited February 2008

    Dear Pepper---Once upon a time........

    Best wishes to you, dear friend!

    junie

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  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited February 2008

    yes Junie.....once upon a time......

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  • PuppyFive
    PuppyFive Member Posts: 2,808
    edited February 2008

    {{{{{Pepper}}}}}

    How are You doing? hope all is well!

    Puppy

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  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited February 2008

    Hi Pup,

    I'm actually doing okay... this is a whole new beginning for me and I find that I am seeing life in a new way with new friends. I have never really allowed people to get close to me unless I have known them my entire life but I am exploring a new friendship and it feels great!!!!!

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  • PuppyFive
    PuppyFive Member Posts: 2,808
    edited February 2008

    You go GirlCool

    Pup

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  • lv2cmp
    lv2cmp Member Posts: 1,363
    edited February 2008

    Pepper all the best wishes to you for a happy life.  Life is too short to not be happy.

    amy

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  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited February 2008

    You got that right Amy - life is way too short and I have taken a big leap off the deep end and may they land where they land!

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  • Emelee26
    Emelee26 Member Posts: 569
    edited February 2008

    :) Pepper..so happy you took the leap!

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