Starting chemo Dec 2007

beasgirl · December 2007

Hi ladies--

Just checking in. Sally, not to laugh at your pain, but the hiccup story is kinda funny--"well, yes, I'm going through cancer treatment, but the thing that's really bothering me? yeah, I got the hiccups..." !!! Laughing You are SO not a wimp--those little sharp, niggling pains are the worst. The whole thing skeeves me out a little, too--it seems like a particularly sensitive place for a permanent doo-hicky. I get my port put in the morning of the 1st treatment (gulp, in 3 days)...my onc said they like to do it that way cause there's still some anaesthetic on it. Maybe they can numb the area a little when you go?

Cindy, you look great bald!!! Lucky lady, with the good bone structure. How are you feeling?

Laurita, glad your tummy is better--your McDonalds story cracked me up--reminds me of pregnancy cravings--and right when we're supposed to be all health-conscious and stuff! And I hope your mom doesn't drive you too nuts--I'm sure it's partly her weird way of dealing with her fears...at least your kids are old enough and cool enough to take her with a grain of salt. Still, sheesh, just what you need...

SO. I got a wig today that I like a lot, and looks very natural--not too "wiggy". In fact, it looks way better than my hair normally looks! That'll be the big give-away that it's a wig--it will be way too not-disgusting to be my own hair! I also got a nice soft hat and a scarf at the cancer shop place in the hospital. They were really nice. I don't know why I continue to be surprised at how nice everybody is...

Funny story along those lines--as we were walking out of the hospital, feeling all sucessful and glowing from the nice-ness of the shop, this lady comes up to us with a big smile and says, "do you need validation?"...and I looked at her for a second before I realized she was talking about my parking ticket, and we all just burst out laughing! It still cracks me up, the thought of people roaming the halls of the hospital, offering complimentary emotional support... hA!

I am starting to get a little list-y (who was talking about that?)--only two more days before C-day, in which to finish all my Christmas shopping, etc. etc...I was worse before my surgery because I really expected to be fully incapacitated for a month--this time I'll probably swing the other way and not do enough!

Right now, I'm hoping my hair doesn't fall out WHILE I'm at my in-laws'. I think it should hang on a little longer--I'll be there days 9-12...right? That's not quite there yet, I think?

Love to all y'all--

Amy

beasgirl · December 2007

Oh gee--I just read Suz's post about her son donating his hair for her--your should have a look--so, so sweet. What a kid!

A

wishiwere · December 2007

Just a short question here? When losing your hair, is it the same regardless of the type of chemo how it happens? I'm doing the A/C chemo (only 4 treatments), started last wednesday, dec 5th. When should I expect to get to the point to need a shave or is that just a possibility yet. I cut 14 inches off just before all this was diagnosed and have yet to mail it in, although I have the address to do so. Just havent' I suppose. With everything else, it's been low on my priorities maybe?

The reason I was wondering is, that I've read it 'sometimes' happens, or only thinning does, and yet the onco nurse as she started chemo said it's a definite I will lose it. So? Is there a time frame to watch for here? Being so close to holidays of course, I'm more curious than I would be in february

Determined1 · December 2007

Hi you guys. I'm considering myself a January '08 chemo gal, even though my first tx is December 27. But I have a question, as it seems many of you are having the same cocktail I'll be having.

I'm going to have TC 4x, 3 weeks apart. My onc did not even mention a port, telling me it could all be done via IV. My question is, are any of you having TC via IV, and if so, what's the prognosis for your veins? Unfortunately, I have crappy veins (collapse and roll), but after three lumpectomies, SNB and anxially node dissection, I'm not AT ALL interested in a surgery to have a port inserted. So, are your veins okay? I only have only one arm left, so I'm hoping things will hold up. (I'm also psychocitally afraid of needles, but that's another story.)

Anyway, thanks for any advice. I have come to understand I have much to learn from those who have travelled this road before me.

D1

suz45 · December 2007

Laurita, Ive been in Vancouver (North Richmond) for about 20 years. I love having the mountains and the ocean in my backyard. I grew up in Winnipeg Tongue out and cant imagine ever living there again, but the people are friendly.... lol. As for decorating the tree and such... I get really hyper when Im nervous. Kinda like an energizer bunny that has od'ed on steroids.

Had the port placed today, piece of cake putting it in. But now that the freezing is out my neck feels like Ive got whiplash and my good boob and is starting to hurt like hell. T3 isnt working so I might try something stronger tonight.

Its official I start my first chemo tomorrow at 8:30 am. Im nervous and at times emotional (also have pms) but ready to start this fight. So I guess we start on the same day Sally, I'll be sending positive thoughts out to you to stay strong. I was afraid #2 was going to be before Christmas but it's on the 27th so I should feel pretty good on Christmas day.

Amy I was called by the cancer agency just after my port was put in today and I was hoping they were going to start my treatment right away. It really was numb for about 4 or more hours afterwords. Also thank you for the compliment about my son Cool I am truly amazed and proud at how compassionate and sincere a person he has become. He just walked in the house an hour ago, took one look at me then gave me a big gentle hug while asking if I was ok Cry .... Enough of that now.

Need to find something really disgusting to eat while I can.

Love and Hugs to All

Suz

bibliowarrior · December 2007

Suz, I'll be thinking of you too. It's comforting to know someone who is having it done this morning too. I'm still sore in the IV area, but I keep telling myself that in a few hours it will all be over and I can come home and celebrate that #1 is behind me. Good luck.

Determined1... I am horribly afraid of needles too, so I understand your concern. Eventhough I've had pain after the port was put in, the procedure itself was pretty easy to handle. Once the pain goes away, I know that having this port will be a blessing since I won't have to be poked everytime they need something. I think they can even do the other stuff through the port... test my blood for white cell count, give me white cell injections, etc. So I've been on board with getting the port put in; I'm just taking longer to heal than most people, I guess. It's not an easy decision-- on top of all the other decisions to make-- but it's one that I'd recommend to someone (even after all this pain). Good luck with however you get your chemo treatments. We're behind ya!

Gonna go eat breakfast and have some more water. I'll check back in later today when it's all over.

-Sally

clsd · December 2007

Dear Determined,

My situation was allot like yours. I had lumpectomy, re-excision, SNB, and did not want any more surgery. I worried about my veins holding up. Yesterday I finished #2 of my TC regimen, and my veins are holding up fine. I feel with only two left to go, I am home free ! The onc nurses use the best needles and equipment, and know how to get even the hardest of veins. Most importantly, the day before your treatment, DRINK so much water you can't take it anymore. This will hydrate you and make your veins easier to navigate for the nurses. Good luck, sending hugs. Cindy

suz45 · December 2007

Dear Sally, I heard they put numbing cream on first so that will help. Someone mentioned being real nice to the nurses and they will get you a couple of pachets to take home with you, so you can apply the gream an hour before you get there the next time (((((((big hug))))))) You can do it girl.

I sorta grazed & drank (water) my was throught the night. Problem was I had to pee every few hows at the same time. When I told DH how much water I'll need over the next few days he offered to go get me a water cooler for the kitchen. How I love that man. Carpets are being done friday while Im at the hospital and Molly maids are in on Monday then our bookkeeper on tues. All ordered by him Embarassed Im starting to feel spoiled as I never could accept help from anyone. I was always the tough one who could take on a dozen tasks at once & not bat an eye (capricorn workahilic) Things are changing, I am changing for the better I believe.

Cindy I keep forgetting to tell you how beautifull you look without hair. Must be your sparkle, briliant eyes and good bones.

.

Told santa that all I want for christmas is to go through chemo w/o too many side effects, and for my head under all this hair to look at least half as good as yours Cool

Time for toast & eggs, one coffee, much water and many warm hugs to everybody

suz

beasgirl · December 2007

Hi all--

Determined, I think if you're only getting 4 treatments, you should be ok without the port--I was originally scheduled to do the TC treatment, too, but that was going to be followed by a year of herceptin, which was the reason for the port. (Now I'm doing only herceptin and Taxol, 12tx/weekly, so even more reason for it.) They'll take good care of you, I'm sure--if you're worried, ask them about it...

Sally and Suz, I'm thinking of you!! I hope all goes well and you're reading this on the other side of anxiety; and not too much erpy-ness or discomfort. Check in when you can and let us know how you are. (I feel like the kid in the Bill Cosby comedy routine when all his friends are going one by one to get their tonsils out, and he's the last one left...anybody remember that?)

Today I was hit full force by the nervousness I've been repressing. Crap! Yesterday at the wig store, she offered me a copy of "Coping" magazine, and I said, no thanks--but if you have a copy of "Denial" magazine, I'll take it! Ha ha. She laughed.

You know what I'm actually worried about? I'm worried that on this new regime (taxol and herceptin) I WON'T lose all my hair, just *some* of it, and I won't know whether to buzz it or not...PLus somebody said that they knew somebody who just lost some hair, and it never grew back very well...I don't want the uncertainty. Much rather just be bald than half bald. Is that weird?

Wishiwere, I think maybe with your regimen I've heard it can take a little longer for your hair to fall out--maybe more like 18-21 days? I'm counting on the chemo nurses to know all this stuff--I bet they'll tell you what to expect.

So, I'm also worried I will forget something--lots of water tomorrow, 5 pills at bedtime the night before...anything else???

Amy

loriann · December 2007

Morning all! Sending good wishes to those of you starting treatment #1! You can do it! Yesterday was a good day for me! I do get the metal taste in my mouth but found that my appetite was almost normal yesterday (maybe because it's "that time of month" as well!) But I ate 2 helpings of spaghetti and 2 helpings of pasta salad! It felt like the good old days! For the bad taste I am finding that sugar-free Ice Breakers Sours are working best. They make 2 kinds with variety in each and I like the green case that includes: Pink Lemonade, Apple, Tangerine and Watermelon. Maybe that will help someone too! I feel about 99% normal today and it's day 4 after treatment! I'm pretty happy about my lack of side effects and hope to keep this up! Hoping doing dose dense doesn't jump up and bite me on the 21st!

I went to the Look Good Feel Better program yesterday and got some great cosmetics and skin care products. It was a small group of 6 and I was the youngest....which bothers me sometimes..not sure why...I'm sure I wouldn't like the news any better if I was older either! I did get a wig from the lady who volunteers to handle the wig exchange program and it is quite cute. I get my good one on Friday but this one will be a great back up or just for a change. I had ordered one from Wig Salon that came on Monday but it is going back! Just to hard to pick by picture only! It was pretty bad! LOL

Now that my port area is no longer sore I am so glad to have it. Even though it was still tender for first infusion I did not feel the actual poke at all..thanks to the numbing cream.....and they did give me some to take home so I can apply it before the next treatment.

WishIWere, I was told, that with the AC, losing the hair was going to happen for sure! They said 14-21 days so I chose day 7 (this Friday) to go get it shaved off and start wearing the wig! I have very thick, below the shoulder hair that I DO NOT want to see come out by the handfuls!! This really bothered me at first but with the passing time I have accepted it...know that it will grow back, glad not to have to color the grey for awhile, sleep in a little longer in the morning since no more blowdrying & styling! Lots of positives to focus on and that is what is working for me!

Hope you all are having the best day possible!! Lori

beasgirl · December 2007

oops, wishiwere--I think I had you confused with somebody else--I think I've heard that with the AC it pretty often comes out in about 14 days. Sorry, I was thinking you were doing TC... well, as long as you know what to expect, right...?

A

beasgirl · December 2007

Lori, I think I may go the way you did and buzz my hair way before it comes out--I know it will be hard living with the anticipation, especially as I'll be travelling for the holidays while it's happening...

guh.

I LOVE those icebreaker sours things--I'm glad they're working for you. I thought they might be too acidic and give me mouth sores, but no? Awesome!

A

Determined1 · December 2007

Thanks, you guys, for the encouragement. I hope your tx's went okay today. I can't imagine what must run through your mind when you're sitting there (although I'll know soon enough...).

I smiled when I read your concern about NOT losing your hair, Amy. My onc told me that I may just experience some thinning, not total loss on the TC. I was more freaked out by that than the thought of baldness (I could just imagine a few scraggly strands coming out the back of my head). But then I look at Cindy's beautiful picture and get some peace knowing she's on the same cocktail and looks fabulous! Crossing fingers we'll all look half as good as she does!

I hope you don't mind if I check in here once in a while. It's encouraging to me to hear how well you're all coping.

Onward!

D1

clsd · December 2007

Thanks ladies for all the hairdo compliments. My hair came out in clumps on day #15. I did not wash it, and on day #18 had it shaved.

Just got back from my daughter's Christmas concert and the Santa hat I wore gave me the perfect coverage ! Had treatment #2 yesterday, so was just glad to get through the concert with a couple tears, and then my dh escorted me out quickly after the show, better than any Britney Spears bodyguard could ever do. I don't want to catch a cold from any well wishers !

You ladies all sound so beautiful on the inside, and that beauty will continue to shine, hair or no hair. I have to admit, I so enjoyed putting away all my brushes, blowdryer,hair ties, hair products........and to think of the $$ I'll save on highlights, I plan on buying some REALLY big and sparkly new earings !! I truly believe my baldness is a badge of courage, and that any cancer cell left in my body is about to be destroyed by the chemo. Keep up all that positive energy girls !!

loriann · December 2007

Just need to correct my statement of feeling so good at day 4...it's really day 5. Must be the chemo brain kicking in....that would explain all the backspacing too! I'll still take it!! Lori

Laurita60091 · December 2007

Good morning ladies,

Sally and Suz45 - you are in my thoughts with your first tx today!

I am definitely in agreement with not wanting ½ or 1/3 of a head of hair. Mine is already much thinner than it was years ago and the thought of going through the process of it falling out is not an option. It will be shaved off, probably this weekend - as Sunday is day 14 for me.

In case anyone is interested they have some videos on Youtube of cancer ladies shaving their heads. There is also a multi-part video of newscaster Kelley Tuthill's breast cancer adventure that is quite well done, as well as other cancer-related videos I haven't watched. Just go to Youtube and type in breast cancer. Amy I think she is from your area as I believe she was treated at Dana Farber.

Suz, I left Vancouver 30 years ago (egads I must be getting OLD!). When I was a kid we used to go out to Richmond to visit friends and pick berries and it was lovely to spend a day "out in the country". Well now I know Richmond has become a city and the whole greater Vancouver area has grown a lot. I swapped rain for sun, but pay for it with the cold. It is wonderful to hear that your husband and son are so supportive and helpful. We certainly do learn to slow down and let others do, which is not such a bad thing.

This has been my pampering week, with the cleaning service and the meal catered. The fellow who delivered the meal yesterday asked me how tx1 had gone. He listed off about 5 women in his family who have had bc. They carry one of the genes. While it is comforting in some ways, it is at the same time horrible to hear HOW MANY women go through this!

Amy, I love your sense of humour - the coping/denial magazine, and particularly the "do you need validation" stories cracked me up. What would we do without a good laugh to get us through this slog?

This week with the SE I feel almost back to normal. Thank goodness the stomach is much better and so is the appetite. I was lucky that the metallic taste left my mouth inside of the first week. I have eaten like a piggy the last couple of days. Put a dent in the Christmas nuts and chocolate. Loriann, I have eaten potatoes (and bread) like never before. Those first few days they were among the few foods that sat well with me. My mouth feels weird, the gums, roof and floor of mouth feel like leather. It is taking forever to get rid of this cold. I have pimples. Enough whining, lol

You ladies are awesome and an inspiration. Keep on keeping on!

suz45 · December 2007

Thank you everyone for all your kind thoughts and prayers, It means the world to me.

Determined, I also think you should be ok with 4 treatments via IV, the nurses in the chemo clinic are incredible and will have you in ship shape before you know it.

Amy, getting the chemo today was really easy. I didn't get any meds for the night before, only the pre chemo pills that I took with me to the hospital. I was pretty scared that it would really hurt because my port was so sore. They didn't even use the numbing cream on mine and still I barely felt it. The chemo took only 1 1/2 hours, DH and I had the room to ourselves so we both sat in the reclined chairs and relaxed. I had a coffee then a ginger ale that was complimentary. I brought along my Jan & Feb birthday cards and signed then all to be ready for the mail. If I keep this up I should be done all B-day and Anniversary cards for this year by January LOL. Don't think I will tell anyone I signed them during chemo. Honestly I though this one was real easy to take. Will have to see if I get any se's later. #5-8 are supposed to be a lot longer 4 - 6 hours there telling me, so that will be the time to bring some entertainment along.

Loriann, Its good to hear you can now really eat now and are feeling more like your old self. I'm looking forward to the Look Good Feel Better program. I just need to wait till my schedule slows down a bit. I also picked up a wig at the cancer exchange yesterday. Its real hair and looks like I can work with it as a spare. More than anything it needs a good conditioner and a few curls. I put it on last night with a hat and dh thought I was modeling a cute little hat. He said he would never had guessed it was a wig as it was so close to my own (with a few split ends and all). I hope to meet with two local places that custom design wigs next week sometime. Will see how that pans out.

Cindy, I hope you enjoyed your daughter's concert. I never missed a concert or sports event when Aaron was in band & soccer. I think its important to be there if you can. Fortunately I was always able to and took such pleasure and pride from it all.

Laurita, I'm only 1/2 a block from the Dyke so I still go berry picking here every summer. I did about 100lbs of blueberries and about 50 of blackberries. They get used almost as fast as I can freeze them. I hope you are enjoying your pampering week. That is just so sweet. I cant think of a nicer gift that someone could give at a time like this (especially with Christmas and all)

OK on to water bottle #5 Tongue out also had a tuna sandwich for lunch and it still is sitting well.

Big hugs for all your kind support and encouragement.

Love Suz

suz45 · December 2007

Sally, I hope all went well today and your feeling alright. I have to check the backposts to see what you got. Remember lots of water and dont forget to take your meds as scheduled.

A super big hug for my cyber chemo sister today.

Love Suz

bibliowarrior · December 2007

Morning ladies Smile

I'm doing ok this morning, but didn't fare so well yesterday afternoon (that's why I didn't write). For anyone awaiting their 1st chemo treatment: rest assured that everything hits me hard and my results aren't normal... even the nursing station told me that (which I think was supposed to make me feel better, but it didn't).

The chemo treatment itself went very, very well. The nurse knew I was scared about the port pain, so she sprayed it with something that helped take the edge off. I didn't even cry when she plugged me in (which says a lot); but I did get myself so worked up that I nearly fainted... felt my head get dizzy, my body broke out in a cold sweat, felt sick to my stomach, etc. At that point, after she'd already got me all plugged in, she offered me a pill for stress... I nearly laughed in her face... "NOW you offer it to me?!!" but instead I just politely declined... I knew I had made it over the worst part.

Aside from being nervous, the whole treatment was very easy to take. I snacked on some things I had brought and some water (had already drank 2 L by the time I got in there), so figured I was doing everything right. Listened to my ipod music and enjoyed the beautiful day outside the window. Everything went very well.

But unfortunately about 15 minutes after we got in the car to go home, I started to feel a little nauseous. I get car sick on long trips, so figured I was just more-susceptible to that sort of thing in my condition and didn't think much of it. But after picking up the prescriptions on the way home, we had to stop the car and let me take the 1st med for nausea. I rememebred everything you ladies said... take it when you need it. It seemed to help a tiny bit, and I ate some rice when I got home, but unfortunately I went downhill from there. I took the 2nd type of med a couple of hours later when I was getting worse. That didn't help at all. I called the nursing station an hour later and got the good news that "Sally, I have to tell you that your reaction is totally out of norm for people. You really shouldn't be feeling this badly the first day. And unfortunately there isn't anything else we can give you to help." Gee, thanks. Cry

10 minutes later I was tossin cookies, but believe it or not I felt instantly better. Not "back to my normal self"-better, but 100% better than I had been feeling. And although I feel as if I'm walking on egg shells-- don't dare move too fast or eat too much for fear of setting it off again-- I haven't felt sick since then. Throughout the night, had 3 pieces of toast, some apple juice, some water and some applesauce. And I felt relaxed enough to get some sleep in chunks. So far, so good. *two thumbs up*

My only hope (deep, deep, deep hope) is that instead of the 2-5 days of side effects that folks normally get, I got a "get out of jail free" card for yesterday and will cruise through the next few days. What're the odds? Well, keep your fingers crossed for me.

I read all the posts before this and want everyone to know I am thinking of them... laughing with them, crying with them, holding their hands... and thanks for all your support. Congrats, Suz... we are so brave!

One down, seven to go! I did it!! I'm a fighter!!!

"Hiii-ya!!!! *karate chopping cancer*

-Sal

Laurita60091 · December 2007

Sally - you are SPECIAL! Laughing

My experience was not actually so different from yours, except my cookies took a few hours longer to toss (tx at 10 am, tossing at 7 pm). But after that I felt better. I am not sure what antinausea meds they gave you. I found in the end what made me most comfortable was the triple threat (suppository) whose main ingredient is gravol. But honestly, it may be that just tossing the cookies was what I needed and that maybe the drugs didn't really make a difference. I'll experiment next tx by using the triple threat up front, and see if I can hold on. I had nausea for a few days but it wasn't enough to ever make me sick. Maybe it would be better described as queasiness. The stomach just didn't feel good. But really it was all bearable after that first day. I love your "get out of jail" card idea, hehehe. I hope it is smooth sailing for you from hereon out......I join you in a drop-kick to some cancer cells!

Suz, your "berry talk" has me salivating. I MUST be feeling better! Blueberry muffins....yum. Those blackberries that grow out on the "wet coast" are amazing! Huge, juicy packages of anti-oxidants. I continue to be impressed with how organized you are, now with the birthday cards. I need to learn a thing or two from you!

Amy, you are in my thoughts for your first tx tomorrow - best of luck.

Hugs to all

Laura

suz45 · December 2007

Sally, I'm so sorry your day didn't go well! I can really relate because It doesn't take much to set off motion sickness when I'm not 100%. Try and rest and look after yourself and don't forget to take your pills.

My night was not as smooth as it could have been, My neck & port were in pretty bad pain again, I felt like I had a bit of the flu aches and minor nausea, nasty whiplash and a 4 day migraine. Most of it because I should have started my period on the 8th (still no sign) I can eliminate migraines, nausea & aches off my se list. I had been taking Metoclopramide for 2 days for my migraine prior to chemo. I wonder if that helped out at all. Anyway I ended the night taking an ativan and percocet to no avail, finally added a prescription sleeping pill at 4am and slept for three hours. I feel like a tired walking chemical bomb.

Laura, My husband and I are self employed out of our home with a (24/7) business, so you get used to finding odd jobs & things to due while sitting & waiting ie: 2-5 hr chemo drip, I am trying to do as much as I possibly can while I still feel good because I'm afraid Im gonna crash soon, and that wont be pretty Yell Cry Embarassed Foot in mouth Yell Sealed .

Today is a pretty easy day, tidy house, bake a pie for Aaron, print some pictures for my mom, do up a bank deposit and maybe even shop a bit. Tomorrow is a different story as I have to be at the hospital at 7-10am for a bone scan then a ten minute jog over to the cancer agency for blood work (2hr wait) then meet with my oncologist, fun fun fun Laughing I still have not started Christmas shopping this...... might be my big problem.

Amy, good luck with your first tx tomorrow. I'll have you in my thoughts and prayers. I hope it goes real quick and easy for you, be strong! I think the first is the hardest due to the unknown. Undecided By the way how did the last one turn out on the Bill Cosby show.

Time to carry on with the day. Warm hugs to all and remember you are all very, very special.I hold all your comments & thoughts dear.

Love Suz

TinaW · December 2007

Hi Amy,

I went to the Oncologist yesterday and they suggest the TC same as you, 3 treatments over 4 weeks. Going to another oncologist on Monday for a 2nd opinion. Will probably start the chemo after Christmas, what a way to start the New Year!! Best of luck to you,my prayers are with you.

Tina

georgias_mommy · December 2007

Hi everyone! Wow. Taxotere kicked my BUTT!!!! I managed to post over in the November Chemo group a few days ago, but haven't had the energy to stay at the computer very long.

I was OK until day 5 (my worst day) then slow improvement until last Sunday night when I felt like I'd been hit by a bus. I went to the cancer center for blood tests on Monday after calling the triage line. Turns out that my white blood cell count (particularly the neutrophil or ANC count) dropped really low. They won't allow you to have chemo unless your count is 1.0. They consider .5 too low and mine was .036!!!! I was sent home with surgical masks, antibiotics and confined to bed until a few days ago. I sure did miss reading all of your posts!!! My oncologist told me that we'll discuss how we'll do the next treatment at my next appointment.

The most amazing thing happened on my worst day...my daughter took her first steps (actually she took a stroll) and I was right there to see it. I sure did need to see that! God works in mysterious ways.

Amy, I've got you in my thoughts and prayers. Good luck tomorrow and check in when you can. (((hugs)))

Suz, your son is an amazing human being. I'm sure that is a reflection of his upbringing! Wink

Hang in there Sally! I'm so sorry that you had such a rough first treatment. I'll be thinking of you!

I'm definitely NOT looking forward to my next tx on the 21st, but at least that will mean that I'm half way through. I'm trying to have a "glass half full vs. glass half empty" attitude. We CAN do this. It may not be pleasant, but it won't last forever and the alternative simply isn't acceptable.

Hope everyone else is doing well.

Sharon

beasgirl · December 2007

Sally, Suz--You did it! you rock! One down! Sorry it was stinky. You totally deserve a get-out-of-jail-free card, Sally. Maybe you're like, SuperCHemo Woman, and it all works extra fast on you, and you'll just speed though all the se's really fast and be like, totally fine by the time you hit your next treatment.

So giant snowstorm today, went out early to the Target to finish my shopping, and after two hours of shopping, discovered that my wallet hed been stolen. Waited an hour at the Target as the storm mounted for my husband to *not* come rescue me (he gave up; the traffic was too terrible). Took me an hour and a half to get home, normally a 20 minute drive. Got back and had to shovel the drive in order to be able to park the car. Barely made it up my unplowed street. Then I had to call all the credit cards and cancel them. Then I slogged through the 10 inches to the Walgreen's on foot to pick up my steriod thingies I have to take tonight.

I haven't really drunk ANY water like I was supposed to, and I was SO psyched to finish my Christmas shopping before I headed into the chemo thing... BLAHH!!!!

What a crappy day. Gotta be at the hospital at 7 tomorrow am, and will no doubt have to spend 1/2 an hour shoveling us out before we leave...Luckily, I'll be pumped on steroids!

Am I whining? Sorry. This just wasn't how I envisioned this "last-chance" day to do stuff.

Hope you're all safely home and snuggling in (if anybody's near here and gettin weather, esp.) It's very pretty... Undecided

Thinking about all of you will help a lot going into tomorrow. I'll check in and tell you all how it went--hopefully it will ONLY be a story about chemo, and not about some crazy trip to or from the hospital!

love--Amy.

georgias_mommy · December 2007

Amy WOW! I'm so sorry! What a crappy day. Here's hoping the Kharma bus swerves out of it's way to hit the jerk that stole your wallet!!!!! Wink

bibliowarrior · December 2007

Amy-

First treatment tomorrow. And you had a crappy day-before (don't you just want to find the loser who stole your wallet and say "Hey you jerk, you stole the wallet of a woman going through cancer. Hope knowing that makes you feel like @#$%!").

Ok, first treatment deserves a special cheer...

"Amy, Amy, she's our girl!

She won't get sick, no, she won't hurl!

Amy, she'll come sailing through!

Good luck! You go girl! Big Woohoo!

Yeeeeaaaahhhhh AMY!!!!"

(Ok, cut me some slack. I'm a librarian, not a cheerleader) Laughing

Seriously, hon, anyone who goes through this crap is a trooper and you are gonna be strong. Rest up tonight and go kick some cancer cell butts tomorrow! We're all behind ya.

-Sal

Oh yeah... today was much, much better for me. Just a constant "I think I might be getting queasy but maybe not" feeling, which is miles above yesterday. Thanks for all your thoughts. Cool

suz45 · December 2007

Oh Amy I'm so sorry {big squeeze hug} If I lived in your neighborhood I would track this jerk down with a BIG snow plow and bury his car with him in it, leaving only a small air hole so that he could sit and think while he freezes his fri&&in @$$ off Yell . But seriously, I wish I could do something to make your day better. Maybe kick back with a warm drink, a blanket and relax. Chin up ok.

First chemo brain moment in my last post. Bloodwork is on the 24th. Tomorrow after the bone scan I get to hustle over to the CC & learn how to give myself the daily neupogen shots. I think I liked my first idea better.

Sharon, I'm glad you got to see that first precious moment. Especially when you were so down. I hope you are recovering strong. Yes, Aaron my son is one of the lights in my life, thank you.

Take care all & stay strong. Hugs

Love Suz

suz45 · December 2007

Avatar is Aaron & I in salon right before the haircut. Too tired to figure out how to post pics right now. Nap time.

suz

loriann · December 2007

Morning all! Wow, I miss a day of posting and all kinds of stuff happens! Let's see if I can catch up!

Sally & Suz, You did it! Keep it up! Using my (imaginary) black belt to kick some cancer cell A** too! Hope the rough start was just getting that one out of the way and the rest are smooth sailing!

Laurita, You are making me hungry too! "Huge, juicy packages of anti-oxidents"! Love it!!

Suz - I also suffer with the period related miagraines and think that may have been my problem with the headache I had the first night of treatment! I too, should have started that same day and didn't! I finally did on Tuesday (I think) but think that played a part in not feeling too good yesterday!

Sharon, I hope you are feeling better and the next one is easier! Don't you just love the small miracles! So glad you got to see those first steps...I remember my daughters too! She's 15 now and it seems like all of that was just yesterday! Enjoy....It goes by so fast!

Amy, Wow...rough day! Stupid jerk that took your wallet! I'm a firm believer of "what goes around, comes around" and though you may never know it...believe that the person will get whats coming to them!!

Now me! OK, brother got to town late Tuesday so I didn't see him until Wednesday. I also worked my full day Tuesday (which is 7-2pm) went home and had to be at a funeral visitation at 4:00, then off to see my brother at my mom's house. I think I overdid it a bit and it was my first day without a small nap and I was so tired by 8:30! Then yesterday morning I woke up, took a shower and then felt like I was gonna hurl for a few hours...and just tired!! Only stayed at work til 10 am, went to the store, then lollygagged at home all day yesterday! Then about 6:00 last night I got tied up with the whole hair thing again! Thought I had worked past it and almost feel stupid that it's bothering me again!! Just started thinking about it being my last night with hair and was in tears again! What can I do! Nothing! I just have to keep moving forward....I know it will come back, I know it will be OK!! My 3 girlfriends are coming with me (appointment is at 4:00) and hopefully I will still feel like going out to dinner!! It's been a couple of weeks since I picked out the wig too! I hope I still like it as much as I first thought I did!! Gotta get a little sleep hat for nights too! I will be thinking of all of you and know I'm not alone!! Lori

Laurita60091 · December 2007

Tina - welcome! Let us know how things went with 2^nd opinion oncologist.

Amy, I am so sorry you had such a lousy day yesterday! We all go through this panicked rush to get things done before our tx or our surgery, and it is just exacerbated by Christmas coming soon, and the WEATHER. Who needs getting their wallet stolen on top of all that? Yikes!

No worries. Christmas will come regardless, and the most important thing is that you can de-stress and do what you need to do to prepare yourself for your tx and recovery. I hope today will be more calm while you have your tx. We are all thinking of you! (((hugs)))

Sharon, it sucks that the taxotere kicked you so hard. Imagine what it's doing to those cancer cells! This is why they do AC and then T separately - because the T gives such strong SE. How fabulous that this was offset by the excitement of being there for your daughter's first steps! You're right - this is all about endurance and focusing on the end goal - finishing treatment and being cancer free.

Suz, you must be SO proud of your son! I hope your headache goes away soon. I couldn't imagine.....

Sally - a warrior and a cheerleader? Who could ask for more? I'm glad your stomach has settled down.

Loriann, I am planning to shave my head on Sunday. It's funny how the hair thing can hit us even when we think we have it licked. In one of my sessions in "cancer school" there was a sister who had just finished her chemo. She was a very strong woman with a real "presence". She related her story where she had planned to shave her head and twice went to the hairdresser to get it done. In the end she was never able to muster up the strength to go ahead with it and ended up crying in the hairdresser's chair. She finally just let it fall out which, thankfully, went fairly quickly.

We just never know how or when this stupid cancer will hit us emotionally. A couple of days ago I was upset about a lump I felt deep in my throat when I swallowed. It's like every little lump, bump, mole, sensation has that little voice in the back of my head wondering "is this the cancer? Is it somewhere else?" Most of the time it's just nothing, as this throat thing was, but nevertheless I think we all go through these emotions and fears. It really helps to have all of you here with your encouraging words, and sharing your experiences.

Yesterday, day 11, I felt NORMAL! Finally got rid of the headcold and no more SE, so I am very happy. Going to enjoy this as much as possible before the next tx. Got the Christmas tree up yesterday. Maybe now I should finish my Christmas shopping, lol.

I wish you all a great day and hope everyone feels well and happy.

Hugs

Laura

Starting chemo Dec 2007

Comments

Categories