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  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited October 2007

    My daughter went to her doctor the other day because she hasn't been feeling well.  She asked her if it was possible that the Epstein Barr virus was back.  She said no.  But that's not what upset me.  She said a woman came in with her hair done and makeup on and said, I have the flu.  The doctor said to my daughter that this woman didn't have the flu because she WAS made up and her hair was done.  She said the man with the shorts on (I guess it looked sloppy) had the flu, HE has the flu.

    I know that when  I've gone to the doctor I've done my hair and makeup.  Men do not have hair to do, nor makeup and they can put on rags. 

    Does this bother any of you?  That a doctor thinks that if one looks well then she's fine?

  • 2up
    2up Member Posts: 1,358
    edited October 2007

    lol .......... i usually look like a million bucks .......... but i feel like death warmed over most of the time!

    what an ass! 

  • AnneW
    AnneW Member Posts: 4,050
    edited October 2007

    Even more disturbing to me is the apparent lack of patient confidentiality from this doctor. It is not appropriate--legal, even--to tell other patients why someone is there in the clinic. Holy cow!

    Anne

  • gsg
    gsg Member Posts: 3,386
    edited October 2007

    That is bizarre.  

    I feel good, but I look like crap.  Hey...maybe she'll give me a prescription for something. Wink

  • roseg
    roseg Member Posts: 3,133
    edited October 2007

    I think the patient confidentiality thing is worrisome. What do you suppose she's saying about your daughter?

    My Pediatrician used to tell me that he was less concerned with a child's temperature than if the child was acting sick. It worked for me because I could never find the thermometer so I'd just watch and see if they were their normal bouncing off the wall selves.

     

  • saluki
    saluki Member Posts: 2,287
    edited October 2007

    Yes- the lack of confidentiality was a lapse on his part--and many Docs are still getting used to HIPAA.----But noting the patients appearance and demeanor is one of the points that has to

    be documented in the Doctors notes among along with history, chief complaint,  physical exam, and whether the visit requires complex decision making in order to

    warrant  different levels of office visits:  and therefore what fee can be charged and what will meet the criteria.  So, observation although you may not be aware is very expected.

    I know--It's ole cynical me again.  But not sooooo cynical.  A good appearance or  lack of can

    be an indicator of something going on----like depression for one--two---and three! And tell me

    when you are suffering from malaise and debilitation that you have the stamina to fix yourself up.--uh uh

  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited October 2007

    Susie, when I got these weird new eye floaters on a Saturday (of all times) I waited for several hours before calling my ophthalmologist.  I looked like you-know-what when I called and he told me to come in.  However, even at my lowest (many years go..anxiety/depression and other symptoms...CRAZY!) I would always do my hair and put on makeup and, of course, bathe.  My MIL would tell me that I didn't look sick and that I should go looking like a hag (my word, not her's).  I just couldn't bring myself to go looking awful.

    I won't say I'll NEVER go looking like a hag, but for now I try my best too look as "cleaned up" as I can.  Therefore, I do not believe one should be judged on how one looks physically.  As badly as I felt going through chemo I still put on my makeup and wig.  And we had a little over two hours to drive which made me have to get up early.

    I worry about what ifs..like, what if I have to go to the ER looking this way!  I know that's dumb.

    I'll have to remember (yeah, right!) to ask my pcp about the physical appearance of patients and what impact that makes on his decision as to how sick  his patient is.

    My brothers always teased me about how ugly I was and that I'd never get married.  Cry  I was the only girl of three boys and the baby.  My oldest brother was 10 years older than me so he wasn't in on the teasing.  They really made an impression on me.  I think that's why I'm the way I am.  Oh, let me tell you, I definitely look

    U-G-L-Y around the house.  But I'm still married! LOL

    Shirley

  • NoH8
    NoH8 Member Posts: 2,726
    edited October 2007

    The lack of confidentiality and adherence to HIPPA is a concern-- this isn't a new law, it's been around for at least 3 years. Susie you make a good point-- appearance and demeanor are part of doctors' notes. Also, lots of people think they have the flu when they really have a virus or bad cold-- still none of this should have been part of a discussion with your daughter.

  • badboob67
    badboob67 Member Posts: 2,780
    edited October 2007

    Wow. I'm glad she's not my doctor! My mets would STILL be undiagnosed. People tell me all the time how good I look. Right....you can't SEE the lesions all over my bones or the pain!

    I certainly hope that doctor meant something else by what she said. It it frightening to think that she is basing her diagnoses on whether or not someone takes the time to take a shower and put on makeup!

  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited October 2007

    I don't believe the doctor pointed out the woman.  I think she was making remarks about people looking great when they're supposed to very ill.  As far as the man....I don't know.  However, seems like to me the door to the examing room would be closed.  My daughter said she looked "good" because she had to go to work then to the doc.  If not, she would have thrown a hair band on and gone (well, perhaps a shower). 

  • saluki
    saluki Member Posts: 2,287
    edited October 2007

    Badboob--I may be in the minority here but I think an observant Doctor can see pain.  He can note how you hold yourself or movements that you are

    not conscious of avoiding or guarding.  He can get an idea by appearance sometimes the level of your functioning or non functioning--a side effect of pain---and

    maybe an idea of your fatigue level.

    Sure,  most of us wouldn't dream of going without a shower for an office visit and making the effort of being put together. But maybe you let a little more time go between colorings or a haircut.  What if that effort takes

    every bit of energy there are probably going to be some telltale signs by an observant doctor.  Pain is fatiguing and goes hand and hand with lack of sleep.  So although, he may not see pain--he may see signs that indicate to him you are in pain --so when you tell him of your pain it completes the picture and there is no question. 

  • Isabella4
    Isabella4 Member Posts: 2,166
    edited October 2007

    Hells bells, I wouldn't be seen out without my hair done, and my make up on, even at home where no one can see me I will pop on the mascara.

    Go to the doctors with my hair unbrushed? and even when feeling rough, just a little slap on? ...not me. I would just hate to sit in the waiting room looking a hag. My DH will tell me the doc won't believe me if I go in the surgery with my makeup on. I have to be dying of a bad flu before I will scrape my hair back and go barefaced in public!!!

    My GP told me not so long ago, 'you always manage to look nice.' She has asked me in the past where I got this or that piece of clothing, and tells me she loves my perfume.

    I had to have a general anaesthetic some years ago, for a dental procedure, and was most upset when I was made to remove my toenail polish !!

    Isabella.

  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited October 2007

    Isabella, lol. 

    When I went in for my mastectomy I couldn't wear any makeup, nail polish and certainly not my wig. LOL  When the surgeon came in to see me and asked how I was doing (prior to surgery), I said, not feeling very attractive with no hair and no makeup.  And, of course, I had that lovely green cap on that you can see right through.  He said to me (and he was bald), at least you'll grow your hair back (while brushing over his bald head). 

    I cannot say that I'll NEVER look like crap if I have to see my doctor.  However, if I PLAN on seeing him because I don't feel well I'll start getting ready the night before....do my hair.  Taking a quick bath in the morning is not as hard as doing my hair!  I'm so ugly it takes me three hours to get ready!  It used to take me two.  However, I'm older and UGLIER! LOL

  • acarr
    acarr Member Posts: 104
    edited October 2007

    Shirley & Isabella,

    You girls sound just like me!  I wouldn't be caught dead going to the doctor's office or anywhere else without makeup on and my hair fixed.  I even wore makeup when I had my mastectomies!  They made me remove my nail polish but didn't say anything about my makeup.  The nurses kept commenting on what beautiful skin I had! LOL! 

    So my docs will just have to take my word for it if I'm sick cause they probably won't be able to tell just by looking at me! -- Amy

  • KariLynn
    KariLynn Member Posts: 1,079
    edited October 2007

    I do not fix myself up to go to the doctor all of the time - I doubt I could scare them anymore!

  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited October 2007

    Amy, they told me I couldn't wear ANY kind of makeup.

    I've been watching the Health Discovery channel.  Pretty soon I'll be able to deliver babies!!!  What's funny to me is the women who go in to have their babies and they look BEAUTIFUL!  After my poor DD had her babies she didn't look so great, nor was she in a good mood.  LOL  With the first child she had to have two units of blood..she passed out twice before they gave it to her.  With the  second one she had an "epidural" headache that lasted about a week.  Needless to say, she wasn't one of the beautities delivering a baby.

  • tawyna1
    tawyna1 Member Posts: 273
    edited October 2007

    hi,

    i think that doctor is silly to judge who is sick by what they look like.

    my mom has a friend name rosa that wears make up all the time.

    when she had her baby she had to fix her self up first.  mom says if rosa was dying she would put her lipstick on first. she cracks me up. 

  • Harley44
    Harley44 Member Posts: 5,446
    edited October 2007

    Shirley,

    When I had my mastectomies, I couldn't wear makeup, either.  I looked hideous!  I also could not wear my underwear... because they said that they might catch on fire!!  Now, I understand that I could not wear a bra, but panties?? 

    My ps told me I can wear my wig for my reconstructive surgery, but I guess I'll have to ask at the hospital, when I go for my pre-op tests.  I bet they say NO WIG!!  UGH!!! I can't go into surgery without my hair!!  Yell

  • JoanofArdmore
    JoanofArdmore Member Posts: 1,012
    edited October 2007

    Shirley that is INCREDIBLY unprofessional!Sophomoric for a doctor to imply that because someone is looking as nice as she can, the person isnt sick! Sophomoic?No-the comment of a 2 year old!

    Why doesnt this fortune-teller try taking the patient's temp?

    Oh Shirrrrrley.You are neither ugly or old!Please stop that!

    I actually dont wear makeup.(Because I'm so young and beautiful).No.Because I wasnt allowed to as a teen .My father pulled me upstairs one day and washed off my eyeliner, that I was trying to sneak out of the house in.

    By the time I was 19, I was married and had my first baby.Who wears makeup while cooking, cleaning and Mama-ing?

    By the time my kids were bigger, I wore makeup, but only for going out.And now that I AM old and ugly, and have no eyebrows or lashes, from chemo, I'm too blind to put makeup on.

    Besides.If any of my docs saw me in (crooked) makeup, they would--yeah, think I was really sick!

    (But would not discuss w/others, or base their dx only on that!)

  • iodine
    iodine Member Posts: 4,289
    edited October 2007

    First time a rad doc told me I had microcals, I was having allergy problems and my eyes were watering.  I was as calm as could be and understood that we were just going to watch them. 

    No problem. 

    He promply called my dh and reported that I was terribly upset and crying.  Of course, my dh knows me well and called to ck.  I explained and we both got a good laugh,

    So much for being able to read a pt's response.

    Now, when I get very nervous and scared, I laugh and tell jokes.  Or when I am in pain, I do the same thing.  Talk about throw off my doc!!  I make sure when I meet a new doc that I'll be with for a while I make it clear to them how I respond to these situations.  Good thing, too.  Otherwise, I'd be getting a lot of psych consults!

  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited October 2007

    Ya'll (that's southern) are too funny!

    Harley, wearing a wig during surgery?  LOL  They'll give you one of those cute little green caps.

    Joan, I would much rather not have to put on makeup.  That's one less thing for me to do when getting ready to go somewhere.  Wearing makeup must run in my family (well, a few females).  My aunt always wore makeup.  I remember watching her when I was a little girl.  I loved to watch her "makeup."  My poor mom would dust her face with powder and sometimes look like a ghost. LOL  We'd have to brush it off her face and clothes. 

    We ARE all different.  I hope doctors really don't "read" us because OF the way we look.  Symptoms are definitely MORE important! 

    Here's something I didn't mention.  My dd was having heart palps.  She's had them for a while.  I have them and so does my other DDs.

    Anyway, hers seem to be getting worse.  To make a long story short, she went to the doc.  The doc had did bloodwork, wanted her to have an echo (and she did), and wanted her to do more things.  Anyway, after her bloodwork came in the nurse told her she was hyperthyroid.  Seems like they didn't even check her chart to see that they were prescribing here synthroid.  Well, they upped her thryroid meds, I believe, during pregnancy.  She was on 125 mcg and they upped it to 150 mcg.  I asked why didn't they just up it to 137 mcg.  Sooooo, they reduced it to 137.  They did her thyroid level again and it was still to high.  So, now down to 125. 

    I can understand that her doc didn't want to take any chances that something was wrong with her heart.  However, I do think she needs to talk to her about the thyroid med and why did she up her that much and why didn't they see that she was on meds before telling her she was hyperthyroid.  I can't tell my dd what to do...like find another doctor.  She has a mind of her own. LOL  Mom's not to interfere unless asked advice. Wink  Oh, but I would if I felt like it was life threatening!

  • JoanofArdmore
    JoanofArdmore Member Posts: 1,012
    edited October 2007

    Shirley, I understand that if a pregnant woman is in need of thyroid hormone,  her body wil take it from the baby.

    This is my guess of why they upped her thyroid during pregnancy.

    I get palps too if my thyroid med is too high.

    BTW.(For your daughter's doc's info):

    On my bottle of generic syntheroid , one of the damn little stickers says "If you get pregnant while on this medication, your doctor may want to raise your dose.If you are no longer pregnant, your doctor may want to change your dose."

    Um-hmmmm.

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