Oogy Feeling

Options
2»

Comments

  • shorfi
    shorfi Member Posts: 791
    edited October 2007

    Hey Joan...just wanted to add that I CANNOT DRINK any "clear" sodas because that is what they always had on hand in the infusion room. Because of the wonderful drugs they gave me to combat nausea, I could literally eat anything...on infusion day...and my dear mother would come over everyday to make sure I ate. Now mind you, she is and was never a "cooker", but she made sure I ate those Lean Cuisine, WW dinners, and Health Choice. Guess what...to this day, I cannot eat those meals. Just the thought of it makes me gag. Reminds me too much of chemo. And what is even funnier...I hope no one will get upset by this statement...even with the breast cancer...I never lost a DERN pound!!! Oh well :)

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited October 2007

    That's a good idea, Valerie!  We could go back and read all her posts and have great laughs.  And, JOAN, YOU COULD GET RICH!!!  And, hire a dog walker! LOL (only when you don't feel up to walking him Wink).

    Shirley

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • Valsul
    Valsul Member Posts: 160
    edited October 2007

    Lini, don't feel that what you want to say is not up to the mark. Anyone and everyone on this bc journey is in this club, chemo or no chemo.  There isn't any part of it that is an opt out.  As one of our other sisters said, we are all walking the same path even if we don't wear the same shoes.

    It's just something that happens to take you back in memory to a less than happy time on this journey.  This time last year I was in chemo and I need to get to January so that I don't have that "this time last year..." any more - if that makes any sense to you.Laughing

    I'm fried, I think - it's 11.30 pm in the UK so I should go to bed, but I hang on until I'm exhausted and fall asleep. Smile

    Big hugs everyone

    Valerie S

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • Sandra1957
    Sandra1957 Member Posts: 1,701
    edited October 2007

    Valerie, yes I do, but I'll say it anyway.  The other day I was sitting in the classroom and an overwhelming sense of nausea came over me.  I felt like puking.  I was thinking to myself at the time "WTF, happened here?  A year and a half ago I was an chubby, housewife shuffling kids around feeling invincible.  Now I'm scared to eat too much for fear it will make more estrogen (but I still drink, now that makes sense), I have no breasts, well overly firm implants that make me cringe everytime my DH tries to touch them.  I used to hate hugging people because they might feel my fat rolls, now I hate hugging people because they'll feel how hard my implants are.  I don't even know why I care, but it all makes me want to puke sometimes.  October is always the beginning of the rollercoaster ride for me.  Thanks for listening. 

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • AlaskaDeb
    AlaskaDeb Member Posts: 2,601
    edited October 2007

    Hey Lini-

    I understand the "hugging phobia", as my hubby called it.  My one set of fake boobs feel too hard when I hug people and the other pair makes a farting noise!  How silly is that.  I actually said "excuse me" the other day...then I felt like a real dork! 

    I had a weird flashback moment last month.  My sister was in the hospital on IV antibiotics (she is fine now).  I could not sit on the side of her bed where the infusion pump was running.  It makes this rhythmic humming noise as it dispenses the medicine and it put me right back in the chemo chair.  It was the same hospital, same color chair, same IV pole.  It made me physically sick...how weird is that??

    I guess I might as well laugh about it.....

    Deb C

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited October 2007

    Deb, your boob story made me laugh.  I have one fake boob and one REAL boob!  When I hug someone I try avoiding the fake boob from touching them.  Of course the fake boob is MUCH firmer. LOL

     Shirley

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • JoanofArdmore
    JoanofArdmore Member Posts: 1,012
    edited October 2007

    Oh Valerie and Shirley, you are much too kind to an old wandering minstrel.

    I actually like the idea of a book of my ramblings, just because they're kinda pointless.Sort of Zen.Not teachy, or I-will-help-you-through-this.We have enough of those books.I believe the only thing we can do for each other is BE HERE!That's what makes BCO so great.Lots of women who UNDERSTAND each other, know where the others are coming from.

    Speaking of this..LINI dont you DARE!! Your experience isnt like mine.So whose isnt valid?Ans:They both are totally valid and we HAVE shared commonalities, like being dx, in all its horrible forms.

    That and the end part-the WORRYING, the constant looking back over our shoulders.So we took different mid-paths.

    The fact is, I'm talking about triggers, if you like, that bring us back to the feeling of dread and fear.We put on the valiant act, we put on the clown act, but we're all vulnerable.Even our poor Shel.(Where are you, Honey?)

    And I have friends who have had other cancers.But there is NO cancer like bc(and I dont mean that in a good way.)

    Deb, not being able to sit beside your sister's infusion pump is another example of instant flashback.Sorry.

    Hope your sister is fine and dandy, and you will never have to be near an infusion pump again!

    Shortbr, I never lost a dern pound either.I consider myself to be lucky to be HOLDING steady 4 years later.

    The Femara is NOT helping.It takes the estrogen out of my system, so my body makes fat so it can get estrogen.Viscious circle.

    Your mom is peachy, isnt she?

    Good luck and hugs to all.j

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • mke
    mke Member Posts: 584
    edited October 2007

    Well Joan, I'm glad your oogy feeling was of the flashback variety rather than one of those things we all fear.  That's what I was worried about when I saw the title.

    I didn't carry a barf bucket to chemo treatments, but I kept one next to the bed.  Actually I had very little problem with nausea but that silly bucket was sort of my security blanket.  I think it's still around the bedroom somewhere - how weird is that?

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • JoanofArdmore
    JoanofArdmore Member Posts: 1,012
    edited October 2007

    Not weird at all.Probably same reason my bucket is holding gloves & not throewn out.Sort of a supersticious thing, I bet.

    Thanks, mke, for worrying.Didnt mean to be worrysome.

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • Valsul
    Valsul Member Posts: 160
    edited October 2007

    My fake boob is cold compared to my real one so when I hug I know that there are differences.  I must investigate whether I could microwave the prosthesis, especially now that winter's coming on.Laughing

    Lini, I didn't go in for reconstruction although my nurses tell me that the scrappy scar is like that so I have some of my own breast skin if I do want to go that way.  I know it's not easy, you sound so down that I want to give you a big cyber hug ((((Lini))))

    I'm a little fat lady and I don't seem to be losing any weight, so I am hoping that Arimidex is doing the job of keeping the oestregen able to ward off the cancer cells.  I am eating healthily - plenty of salads, not too much bread or potatoes and some sweetie treats (it's bad enough doing this bc journey without giving up everything sweet in life!) but no weight loss, not even a meagre ounce.  Not even on chemo!

    Chin up, dear Lini, and read Joan and Shirley's hoots of posts.  Sometimes I have come to these boards low and depressed and have found myself crying with laughter at some of their posts.

    Big hugs

    Valerie 

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • Valsul
    Valsul Member Posts: 160
    edited October 2007

    Deb that farting boob story is too much.  I have hurt my shoulder laughing. 

    Valerie S

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • Sandra1957
    Sandra1957 Member Posts: 1,701
    edited October 2007

    Thanks, Val.  I'm not down, just have my moments.  Mostly scared moments.   You've got a great attitude Val.  I've literally laughed out loud also at many of those posts. 

    lini

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter

Categories