I am starting chemo in July 07. Anyone else?

Glad to hear the Taxol wasn't so bad Abbi, that's great news!  Very cool about the quilt too.  I've always thought about trying quilting, is it hard to pick up?

Abbey, my little boys are 3 & 1.  My 1 year old Ben is the one who was sick.  They sure keep me on my toes!

Well, day 2 after my Taxol and I feel like nothing's happened at all.  No nausea, though I am taking the compazine. 

Slept really well last night w/o taking a sleeping pill.  I figured I had enough drugs floating around my body, I was going to see how I did w/o it.  Woke a couple times, but went right back to sleep.  Got up with the alarm at 5:30, got the kids off to school and crawled back in from about 7:15 to 8:30.  I'm still a little tired, but I think it's a combination of lack of sleep over the last couple weeks and life in general.

Kinda waiting to see if I'll get the aches I've heard others report over the next couple days, but so far this is a MUCH EASIER drug than the A/C.  11 more weeks of this will be not too bad.

Abbi

Just go done with AC #4 yesterday. I am now taking Emend. The nausea was so bad with the previous AC treatments. I'm hoping this will make the last one the easiest one! The next couple of days will be telling.

Those who have started Taxol are giving me hope that my 12 treatments will be nowhere near as bad as the AC. I too have to take 5 Decadron the night before and the morning of. This also causes me concern.

It's funny. I thought I'd be feeling so elated that I was done with AC, but like everyone else recently, I'm just so tired of the whole thing. Tired being the operative word. I get home from school and I just collapse. My red blood count was very low so I had to get an injection of aranesp. The onc said it should give me more energy and that the low count has been a reason I've been so tired.

I did have something good happen. I went to the American Cancer Society and there is a lady who volunteers once a month helping women with their wigs. She owns her own wig shop and specializes in chemo patients. I got a free wig and she styled it beautifully. She cut out pieces of the actual wig and stitched it back together until it fit my head like a glove. I have a small head so most wigs are too big on me. She made bangs to attach into a scarf if I wanted. She was amazing. Just fearless with those scissors. I had pictures with me precancer hair days and she styled it with wig mousse and it was such a cute wig when she was done.

Stay strong everyone.

Jane 

Abbey I used to be a swimmer and I always worked out after school. I get discouraged when I think of my muscle tone fading, but I know I will get back in shape when this is all over. I do what I can, but weights are out of the question. They pull on my port and really bother it. It's located right under my bra strap and even my bra bothers it, so I have to wear a certain bra that has straps way over to the side. You're doing amazing keeping up with rigors of being a PE teacher. I know I walk around the classroom more than the typical classroom teacher, but no running for me these days.

Will we ever be normal again?  Yes, we will be normal again, just not under our old definition of normal.  I don't think you can ever go back to that after being through something as hard as this.  I too am so freaking tired of this chemo routine.  Whoever said it was a marathon was right! 

Good Saturday to everyone.  Wow, what a week.  My mom and sister-in-law have been visiting from Michigan so I have been trying to keep them entertained. 

I go for taxol #3 on Monday then only 1 more to go.  There really is an end to chemo.....I can see it!!!!  Then I get to be nervous about radiation.  I'm sure it's going to be much easier then chemo but the thought of getting the "tattoos" terrifies me.  Not like I'm deformed enought now I get to have blue dots on me.  I haven't had to much trouble with taxol.  I have been having pain in my node removal area.  So much that yesterday I couldn't wear a bra, I had to wear my cami from when I had my mastectomy.  My other breast has been giving me some problems as well.  I don't know if it's PMS (even though my perid hasn't shown up for 2 months) but my breast has been painful.  I keep feeling for lumps but nothing there.  And the pain moves, one day it will be one place and the next day the pain is somewhere else.  At times the pain even radiates down towards my ribs.  I know I have to say something to my onco. but I am terrifed.  It will mean more tests and more waiting for results....will this ever end.

I took my mom out on a casino boat the other day and we had a great time.  Everyone was really nice but I did have this older gentleman that would not stop staring at me.  We were all standing waiting for the boat to doc in this hallway and he was literally staring.  Then he moved closer and kept staring then look away, staring and look away.  Finally I said something to my sister-in-law and she must of gave him a dirty look because he didn't look at me again.  I can't wait for my hair to grow back.  I think it started to a little and then I noticed the other day it was falling out again. 

I hope everyone is doing well.  Abbi, glad to hear taxol went well.  AC is evil but I can handle the side effects of taxol.

Have a great weekend everyone!!!!

Ginger

Hi everyone:

I have finished my TC and will be having my mast and reconstruction this Wednesday (Sept 26). I am really scared. It seems like this will never be over. My lump appeared in May, I had my excisional biopsy, then chemo. 

Three weeks after my surgery, I will be back on chemo...again. My Onc wanted me to have TAC next time but as it appears the TC didn't work, he may change it to some other cocktail. 

I had only 3 tx of TC but wondering how long most of you are on TAC, 6 treatments? 

(((Jean))).  I'd be scared, too.  Hang in there... it'll all be over before you know it.

Day 3 after Taxol #1 of 12... no nasty SEs other than I messed myself up with my Lexapro.  It makes me sleepy for a couple hours when I take it in the morning so I decided to try taking a night.  I've been awake since 12:30 a.m.!!!  So today, I'm a zombie.  Fatigue is getting me... I think it has nothing to do with the Taxol and everything to do with me being stupid and messing with my dosing schedule.

Seeing a therapist tomorrow for the first time.  I feel silly, but I really am having anxiety and depression issues, so it's time for some professional help.

This journey is just too darn long and hard.....

Abbi

DH and I were just moving stuff out of the closets in preparation for the rug guy coming tomorrow to install carpet in our bedroom. We found the gray wigs my MIL gave me back when I found out I was going to need chemo. They were hers from her chemo for lung cancer. But she is in her 70's and I am 42! (OK I'll be 43 in a couple of weeks). No grey wigs for me! DH and I had a giggle. I know she had good intentions though.

Seeing the therapist yesterday was very helpful.  He gave me some good insights into what I'm doing that's causing so much anxiety.  For me, a control freak, the lack of control is a big issue.  And I try to "plan ahead".  I'm worried about all kinds of things that are in the future and that I can't control.  The trick is to stop myself when I'm doing that and remind myself to deal with TODAY and what I can control NOW.   I actually felt better yesterday than I have in a while, so it was a helpful thing.

So, that being said, why the heck can't I sleep?  DH and I were watching TV last night and I could hardly keep my eyes open.  So I go to bed at 10:00 and lie awake.  Finally, about 1:30 I took a Xanax figuring it would sedate me a bit and maybe I'd sleep.  So I slept from maybe about 2:00 until about 5:00.  Trying to live on 3 hours sleep ain't gonna do it for me?

My treatment day is on Thursday (1 down, 11 to go), so I don't think I can blame the steroids.... they'd be out of my system by now, right?  Maybe it's the Lexapro.  I've only been on it about 10 days and one of the side effects listed is insomnia. 

Whatever, I'll be taking a sleeping pill tonight.  I worry about becoming dependent on them, but I need some sleep.  The days are long enough right now, I don't need long nights and feeling like a zombie all day.

..... what a mess this all is!

I also have had sleeping issues that seem to coinside with my treatments.  For a couple days after treatment I feel so tired...but then sometimes can't fall asleep or stay asleep.  Now that I'm teaching during treatments though, I will say that sleeping is usually not a problem for me...I'm so exhausted that I sleep pretty well.  I go for my last treatment of Taxotere on Thursday...then I will officially be half-way done with chemo.  However, now I have to wait to see how much worse/different I feel when I start A/C in October...that makes me a little nervous.  I did decide to take the Friday after treatment off completely from teaching though, starting with this treatment.  It was really hard to teach the next day...I really didn't think that I was going to make it last time.

Abbi...glad to hear that the therapist helped!  Hope everybody is able to get some sleep. 

Charlene - Are you doing the 4 Taxol or the 12?  I'm doing the 12 and I can honestly say that I've had no neuropathy, nausea or bone/muscle pain.  My only side effect is the darn insomnia.... and I'm not sure where that's coming from.

Took my Restoil at 10:00, was out by 10:30 and up a little before 5:00.  6 1/2 hours.... guess I can't complain about that.  I'm still tired, but I think the fatigue of treatments doesn't get cured by sleep anyway.  At least for that 6 1/2 hours I'm able to "escape" from cancer.  That in itself is a blessing.  There's nothing worse than lying awake in the middle of the night for me. 

Taxol #2/12 tomorrow....counting them down!

Hi everyone. Well, I had Taxol #3 on Monday and am feeling great still today. After my first Taxol, my eyes were really watery, but that seems to have gone away. I haven't had any neuropathy. Last week my red count was low so I got a shot (don't remember what it was), and a few days later my lower back was a little achy. But that has been it! Oh and of course the fatigue and the sleep disruption. Who could forget that???

When I saw the NP last week for a check, she emphasized the importance of "restorative sleep", and encouraged me to try a sleeping pill, but I just can't stand the thought of adding more chemicals! She suggested over the counter Tylenol PM or Benedryl as alternatives.

Charlene, at my chemo place they said they don't give the Neulasta with Taxol. They said it isn't necessary and there are other things they can give. I did have it the day after each A/C and it always gave me pain in the bones of my face! It's interesting how each onc. does things a little differently. I'm still amazed at those of you who take the Decadron prior to each tx.

Ginger - GLAD to hear that what you've been feeling is nothing to worry about. What a relief for you!! And Abbi, hooray for therapy! We gotta do what we gotta do to get through this, right?

So is anybody gaining weight? I'm up 10 pounds since my surgery in June. Probably 6 pounds since I started chemo. I hate it! The running is getting harder and harder to keep up, so I'm trying to be sure to get out and walk every day. We'll see how Pilates goes tonight. The first night we didn't do much more than learn how to breathe Pilates style, which made me dizzy.

Donna

Abbey, I noticed you are triple neg like me has your Dr said anything about it as far as being a bad thing, my Dr says its just a biology thing and it really doesnt mean anything not to worry, anyone been told anything.

Thanks Tina

Hello all.  Well neulasta is kicking my butt again...I think it's worse then the chemo.  And I got less then half a dose.  But thank goodness I won't need to have it for my last treatment so no more neulasta for me!!!

Abbi, so glad you went to thearpy.  I may be joining you if I can't get out of my funk that i'm in.

Tina - when my FISH results came back showing that my HER2 was negative and I mentioned the words "triple negative", my onco. was not happy.  He explained that it isn't a bad thing and that triple negatives respond better to chemo.  All I can do is put my trust in him.

Donna - I'm jealous that you have the energy to run and do pilates:)  I so need to get back to the gym....it took me 3 years of hard work to get my muscle's toned and it took 3 months to lose it.  Maybe i'll attempt some yoga this weekend.

Everyone else....hang in there.  We can do this, we have come this far...we're closer to the end of chemo then we are the beginning.  Lets all be proud!!!!

Ginger

Abbey -

Regarding the genetic testing.  It's very easy... just a little blood test but expensive ($3500 of which I had to pay $440).  If you DO have the gene mutation, your chances of recurrance go up substantially and some gals choose the option of a bi-lateral. 

The kicker for me was that the same gene mutation also shows up as ovarian cancer.  If I had the gene, I would be having a hysterectomy.  No history of ovarian in my family, but they all had gyn problems and hystos before they were 40.  I'm 44 and done having babies, so losing my ovaries doesn't bother me.

You're very young and still need those ovaries! 

In my case, I'm SURE there's a genetic connection.... science just hasn't found our connection yet.  But maternal grandmother, mother and me.... all in our mid-40s..... that can't just be co-incidence.

Just some thoughts for you to ponder.

Getting ready to take my Decadron in 4 hours (along with a sleeping pill)!... Taxol #2 tomorrow (10 more to go.....)