Starting Chemo in JAN 2007

Debbie, Hobby Lobby and Garden Ridge (which I believe you have in TX) have a great stock of inexpensive bandannas. Congrats on the more than halfway point on rads!

Well, I met Frances Sheehy's twin today. Rebecca, you would have fallen over. This little girl at my kids school is absolutely her double...right down to the eyes, hair and glasses. I was like "oh, I know that girl"...then "wait a minute....". I'll have to find out who she is and get a picture somehow.

Met my kids teachers. Jaclyn is in a tiny, overflow class w/only 16 kids which is great. Most class sizes are in the low twenties, which isn't bad, but this is better. I also met my sons teacher and a mom I know whose son had her last year confirmed that yes, she did have BC but kept it very private (apparently not private enough if I found out...but.). I guess everyone handles it different. She looked 100% normal..ha-ha! There I go again: expecting her to look somehow different. But it didn't appear that she lost her hair at all, so...she must have had a different treatment. I wonder if she'll ever share anything w/me about as the year goes on.

Hot and humid here and my a/c died today. Terrific. This happened to us before, in FL, also. We need a new compressor and I'm afraid they are going to say I'm like a week outside of warranty. I will flip.

Viddie - a clear path report! Wonderful! Fantastic! Don't feel even the slightest bit guilty about not posting so often. Sit back, enjoy the pain killers, rest, and heal.

Tina that is so funny about finding my daughters doppelganger like that! In my experience with large appliances, the manufacturers plant small detonators that are timed to go off as soon as the warranty expires. The only way to keep your stuff from self destructing is to pay for the extended warranty…when you do so, they disable it by satellite

Viddie I am sooooooo glad that you finally feel strong enough to post. It sounds like things are going well, and it is very reassuring that there was no cancer in your breast tissue. Rest up, take your time and heal.

Good girl Nancy…keep taking those pills! I hear you on the peeing and the sweating though. YECK. I have been more comfortable since the weather turned cooler here in the last few days. The sweats have not been bad enough for me to go and get the ice paks from the freezer during the night.

Jan do not fret the onc….it is not so bad to go there if they are not planning on poisoning you. Mine does well-visits when there are not people in the infusion suite, so it makes it much easier.

Joni-hang in there scansiety (LOVE THAT WORD) stinks, but it will be over, and it will be fine.

Lots of prep work for school going on here….had to order a wheelie-brief to use when I go back to work….carrying my normal bag is a definite no-no for at least the next few months. I hope I like it!

Going to see the PS tomorrow at lunchtime. He is going to snip a few stitches and inspect my incisions. To my untutored eye they look pretty good, and everything appears to be healing cleanly. In fact, I observed my mutant nipple acting like a real one last night…I was so excited I made DH come and look. He cheered for me, but gave me a distinctly strange look It gives me hope that maybe my healthy breast was not as badly mutilated as I feared, and that it will, one day, look normal again. The other one will always be a bit off, but I am not worried about that….the remaining asymmetry that I can see can easily be corrected with standard undergarments or a silicone lick-n-stick prosthetic nipple.

Hi Gals,

Here I am on Monhegan with internet of all things...where I least expected it!!! I've been lurking a little and feeling awful about the terrible surgeries some of you are going through. What horror stories!!!! I just hope most of the problems you are having {{Rebecca}} are temporary and will change when the trauma of surgery eases up....geezusss!!!

I haven't exactly been having a carefree vacation....too many people who are close to me who are having serious problems.

Can't paint and it's very hard to be here, where there is so much beauty to paint and seeing others doing it and not being able to any more. Don't know whether it's the fatigue and worry or if chemo has cooked my brain. I think I need some post treatment counseling. I am getting very self-centered and depressed...on vacation!!!! Things feel strange. I think it would be better if I focused on things that are less frustrating.

I see most of you are baring your heads. I feel more self-conscious than ever on vacation and I'm back in turbans & bangs. But it's cold here and I need the warmth.

I hope this is just a bad day and there are better days ahead.

Linda (aka Mizsissy)

Well, it's past my bedtime, but I'm awake and wanted to check in before I fall asleep. Saw the new oncologist this morning and I liked her a lot. She is young, but very smart, easy to talk to, and although I really like my old oncologist, I think I will probably change. I feel like a traitor, but if and when I have a recurrence, I might want to be in the M. D. Anderson system, I'm thinking. She said pretty much the same thing everyone says, that the chemotherapy regimen I got - and most all of us got - is appropriate and adequate treatment. I told her I thought I was going to have a recurrence, and she said that she woudl talk to the oncologists downtown at M. D. Anderson and see if any of them had any feeling about giving me more chemotherapy. So at least she listened to me. I have an appointment to see her in September, after I am done with rads. I was pleased with how the appointment went today, whether or not I get more chemo - I wanted another opinion, and I got one. It's not like I want more chemo, I just want to do everything possible, as we all do.

Viddie, so glad to hear from you. I'm sure it will get easier every day, and the hardest part is behind you now. Just post whenever you feel like it - we'll understand if you're not here as much for a while. Wonderful news about your path report!!!!!
Caya, it must feel good to be back at work, but I'm sure you'll enjoy sleeping in tomorrow! I'm planning to do the same, and all I did was get up at 7:00 this morning. Your daughter probably could work as a model - has she ever expressed an interest? She's a beautiful girl. Both of them are.
Mizsissy, I hope you can relax and enjoy your vacation some. I know there are a lot of worries and anxieties, but what a shame to be on this great trip and not be able to relax enough to enjoy it. Have you tried painting and not been happy with the results, or are you just not inspired? I have no idea how the artists mind works. Maybe some counseling would help when you get back.
Lynn, good to hear from you, too, and I hope that being back at work suits you. Good luck on the diet.
Rebecca, good luck at the PS tomorrow. I'm betting that the suture removal won't be as bad as you think it will, and I hope that he can reassure you about your "issues" with your appearance. Glad you're feeling better about it, anyway.
Nancy, I'm sure I knew this at one time, but what are you seeing a physical therapist for? I was just thinking today about asking my internist to give me an order for PT. I had just started a year ago when I was diagnosed and had to stop, but I think it would be helpful for my back pain (caused by all my foot surgery) if I'd get back with it. I do go to the gym on a regular basis, but sometimes it helps to have someone really push you, and I can't afford to pay for a personal trainer right now. Glad you're taking your pills.
Tina, so sorry about your AC! It always happens in the hottest time of the year - usually when you hav e company coming. How wonderful for Jaclyn to be in a class of only 16 - that is almost unheard of these days.

Eyes are getting heavy - hugs to all, and goodnight.

Linda/MZ, I think we have big expectations out of vacations, sometimes...and when they sometimes don't turn out to be "all that", it temporarily bums you out. I think it's similar to post holiday let down.

Nancy, yeah, I wish you and your a/c company were closer too! It cooled off considerably here last night, but major thunderstorms. I slept on the first floor because it was cooler. I hope Buckeye Heating and Trane don't start giving me the megarunaround today. Buckeye told me mid-July that they needed another person to come out in order to officially declare my compressor "dead". They never came. I went to Boston/came back, called SEVERAL times and even had to pull out the cancer card (told them I was on chemo...white lie..but herceptin is close enuf!). STILL, I had to call THEM again yesterday to say "hey, it's 100% gone, no cool air whatsoever". They send the same cigarette reeking guy here that couldn't determine what the problem was back in July...the one who said he needed another body here to dx the sitch. So he tells me I need a new capacitator. I say I just got one (had the receipt). Oh, no, not THAT capacitator....the other one. As if I know there are two. Then he wants to attach two 40's to make an 80, whatever in thee hell that means... then he tries that and says nope, that's not it: it IS the compressor. Meanwhile I've lived with crappy to now zero air for over a month. OK... enough of this boring story. I need to complain to them, not you guys.

Tina, Sorry about your runaround, but I have to say the mechanic they sent you sounds pretty inept. A capacitor is usually tested first to determine if the compressor is bad or not. There are 2 capacitors one for the compressor which is a 25 or 35 MFD and one for the fan a 4-5 or 7 MFD. A compressor capacitor ususally runs about 78.00 for the part. Sounds like you have about a 4-ton unit. That guy is a perfect example why HVAC has a bad rap. How old is your house Trane usually has a very good parts warranty. 10 years . Good Luck. Tell them you don't want "chimney" back to your house that he stinks!!
MEl, I am taking PT because chemo has taken every bit of tone outta me, there are times I feel I need a wheel chair. I actually became arthritic and I am still a baby! Ha.

More great pics out of Canada. I've only been once...to Montreal in college. I never realized how nice it us up there until I met you guys. You look good, Sharon....very healthy and relaxed!

Also, nice Calif. pics. Robbin. Where is Lake Almanor? That's SoCal, right? Is that somewhere in near Temecula? I recall driving out to Lake Elsinore one time for work. I had to do apt. inspections on a complex out there...like 30 random units and report on the interior condition, i.e. seismic cracks, etc. What a trip... interesting place is all I will say.

Nancy, thx. for the insiders a/c scoop. I'm saving that paragraph so I can sound knowledgable should the thing crap out again. They came back today (the chimney...ICK!) and replaced the capacitator or capacitor ??? the condenser. They said it was under warranty but w/the freon and labor, it cost me $900. The house was five years old in Feb., but I closed on it in July. Way too soon for that to be happening. It's not like when were in FL w/the a/c running 24/7/365.

Jan, I'm doing the happy dance with you. School starts in 14 hours! Wahoooooooo! My daughter is a 1st grader too. This will be the first time in ten years that I'll have a full week to myself. Literally. I'm sure it'll seem odd some days, but for now, I'm excited. My son starts 5th grade, which I can't believe... he began his whole school "career" out here in OH and it's his last year of elem. school already. Boy, does the time fly!

Gotta go get my Costco/Kirlands lasagna out of the oven. Such the chef! Rebecca, are you horrified?

Oh, Caya, how awful! Now, I know, and you know, that they are always overcautious, especially with us bc survivors. They have to be that way. And he said it looked benign, and the onc. said it would be highly unusual so soon after chemo.....so, to an uninvolved person, that would sound like about a 0% chance of it being anything. However, for you it sounds like a nightmare, having to wait until Thursday. I don't know why they don't think, before they call, that if the dr. isn't going to be available for two or three days, then just maybe it would be kinder not to call until he is. So sorry you have to go through this. I promise you we will all worry with you and anxiously await your "not guilty" verdict. Until then, this sounds like a job for Ativan!!

Great pics. Sharon and Robin - you look fabulous.

Caya, so sorry to hear your worry. I'll be worrying right along side of you, but I agree with Mel that they are just being cautious.

You parents of first graders == start saving for college! It's getting ridiculous! Enjoy them, soon they will be gone.

Hugs to all, Mizsissy - takes some photos!!!

Tina I swear that modern day large appliances (like your AC) are designed to be crap and to last less than 5 years. We are, after all, trained from an early age to be good consumer-robots. Next generation is even worse….even their games look like shopping (have you looked at Webkinz?) At least it is fixed, although I HATE IT when they charge you huge fees for a “warranty repair” like that. I mean would you have really NEEDED the Freon or the labor if the unit had not been defective? Honestly I think they should have not charged you anything. Absolutely disgusting. I heard today on NPR that there is flooding in Ohio…you guys ok?

Oh….and frozen lasagna…. I have to admit to a large bag of frozen tortellini in my freezer! I cringe when I make it, but sometimes a moms gotta do what a moms gotta do

Robbin those are awesome pictures. So beautiful! I hope that work is going well for you. Did your man call you?

OMG Caya that is so absolutely cruel. To get a call like that and not to be able to do anything about it. Frustrating is not the word. I am soooooo sorry. Let me take some of your fret load for you. I am sure that it is nothing…maybe it is some scar tissue from your reduction. Scanziety strikes again, but this time at the other end. I agree with Mel…sounds like a job for our favorite superhero…ATI-MAN!

Jan I am so glad that DD had a great first day of first grade! Those early grades are sooooo important.

I found out yesterday at the PS office that there was a suspicious finding during my implant surgery (abnormally large amounts of fluid around my expander) and he was worried enough that he sent a sample for analysis. The path came back clean, but I was still horrified. I felt like Homer Simpson experiencing the 10 stages of grief in 30 seconds. I was annoyed that he did not tell me, but also grateful that he waited so that I would not have to spend the two weeks worrying about it. While I was there he (of course) had to pat himself on the back regarding how beautiful my boobs are (not!) and poke them a few times. I always feel a bit odd sitting there with my little smurf of a dr poking my boobs. He took out my stitches, except for a big scary one on the bottom of my augmented breast (it is a large black silk thread, comparable to embroidery floss). He left that one because (believe it or not) I am still bleeding a little from that spot. I did discover when I got home that he missed two stitches. YUCK…well they will either fall out or he will get them when I go back next week to get the scary stitch out. Other than that it was pretty uneventful, although I wound up not feeling very well for the balance of the day as a result of having my wounds messed with I think. I was going to take a pill last night, but I resisted, and actually it turned out OK as I slept through the night for the first time in weeks.

OK, got to start my day…….

caya , omg hope you are fine and you will be , I agree it may be scar tissue Its freaky all the same , my ct scan was ok on my head but i still get dizzy spells and my ears are ringing . May be inner ear or vertigo . Dr says see what a couple of weeks brings and check back in with her , not back to work until end of Sept anyway .
My Rebecca you are having troubles stiches are not that bad to take out , the ones I had in my tummy were like 50lb test fishing line and were over 1ft long when the dr took them out . I was expecting them to hurt , and so did the dr but i took a deep breath and ...... zap out they came . The nurse had never seen anything like it and was telling all her coworkers about the gal with the long stiches . ( all they see are rad patients no surgericals ) Still its a bitch when you are not healing right . Hope all works out , my left nipple is higher than my right and my girls say i look funny (ewww gross mum )
Miz I like the pic of the vase try that in a sketch and then do a one tone wash of it , I have looked at your watercolours online and you are talented . I bought alot of books on my holidays and one of them was the "big fat book of watercolour basics " I have never done watercolour but i am going to give it a try. After I get unpacked from vacation , still doing laundry !
My youngest had to go back to the dr as we had several messages on our phone when we got home . She HAD strep throat in May and her gland on the back of her neck was still swollen , found out yesterday she has mono ! yikes her spleen is enlarged and we were tubing on our vacation lucky nothing happened , but now she has to be careful no more theme park rides or tubing for the rest of the summer . She was not even tired or sleepy ? But now we know we have to watch out for her for another 6 weeks , has not affected her much ...... I am sure it was her ex boyfriend that gave to her .... kissing ONLY I know my baby and she insists that nothing else happened thank god they broke up ! oh teenagers man .....
yep and me too on with my day i have promised myself to start getting back into a routine and that means gtting back into my garden ... have a good day everyone chek ya later

Speaking of pregnant, I am/was definitely done. However, three of my cousins and one of my oldest friends have all had "last minute" babies now at near/at age 40. I definitely don't want to do that but it's kind of bothering me that the choice isn't really mine now. It's been made for me. I've had dreams/nightmares, really that I've discovered I am pregnant and I panic because I'm thinking this will bring on a recurrence! I know many people don't agree with that, but it's not a risk I'm willing to take. Anyway, it's just one of the smaller things that kind of bother me lately, as I hear of this one is having a baby, that one... just kind of sad and final...

Hey, is this the same girl doing the happy dance that her first grader is going to school full time yesterday?

Sharon, that's the second time I've heard of someone getting mono this week. I wonder if that's a seasonal thing...like the flu. Glad she doesn't feel bad, at least.

So many posts. I'm glad I get them in my inbox so I can keep up with reading all of them. Of course somedays I forget to come here and post answers.

Great pics, everyone, it makes me want to go some place.

Is there always something to worry about. I hope everyone gets good reports, soon.

I'm doing well with rads. Today I had my second of 10 boosts. Naturally, the marks they put on me yesterday sweated off before I got home; the inside of my sports bra was black when I took it off. Luckily, the techs made a template, and they could re-mark me today. They used a paint marker this time for the focal point in addition to the Sharpie.

My collar bone area is quite red, but since there's no more treatment to that area, I hope it will start healing. The doc mentioned Domeboro to me yesterday, and we stopped for some on the way home. It's a powder that you mix with water, then soak the area or make a cold compress to ease the burning and itching. It seemed to help the last two days. I'm continuing the cortisone, aloe, and Aquaphor everyday, too.

I made it to my water aerobics class Monday and again this morning, but I'm staying in the 4 ft. end. Also, I'm going more low impact to keep from splashing my collar bone area. Even with Aquaphor slathered on the effected areas, the water stings a bit.

I checked in a couple of times at the chat room last night, but never found anyone there. Hope to catch you next time, though.

Until then everyone have a good week.