Starting Chemo in JAN 2007

Skye - glad you are taking extra time for your book outline, and good luck on Monday with your rads. Also glad you got the "pee" situation cleared up!
Lynn- glad your headache is better, thanks for your experience with Tamox.
Rebecca - I probably have around 50 - 60 pairs of shoes and boots at one given time - When we built our house 6 years ago I had the custom closet guy build me special pull out shelves in my closet that can hold 8 pair of shoes at a time - and I have four shelves on each side of the closet - so that means up to 64 pair at one time! I have to wear the new patterns each season (it's a dirty job, but someone has to do it)...
Jan - hope your DD is feeling better, strep is the pits, sure hope you don't catch it. Have fun tomorrow at the DogsWalk for Cancer. I am hopeful now that my night sweats will diminish once I start the Tamoxifen, and that my sleep will also be better.
Joni - I am THRILLED for you. Your treatment plan sound very thorough, and you onc. sounds amazing.
Mary - ah the powers of the legal letterhead! Glad you will finally start your rads on Tuesday. Good luck
Mel - glad you are recuperating well. I hear you on the DH and the lack of interest - I think they just can't cope.
Tina - glad your son got his problem all worked out - this always happens with kids,doesn't it - we drop everything to run to their aid, and then BAM - it's over.

So I have some gorgeous pix of DD's prom, but I can't figure out how to download them to the site - it says you need a website to do it, and I don't have one. DD tried to do it, says she can't. Any suggestions gals?
thanks
caya

Cindy,
Good luck tomorrow. So you are permanently topless? You go girl!!!!
Caya,
I am also being honored in our local Relay for life. Unfortunately it is on the day of my infusion, so I will not be attending. I would have liked to though. My oncologist had not mentioned tomaxofin yet. I just assumed it would be after the herceptin. I will ask her when I see her again. I am so jealous of all your shoes. LOL
Tina, Skye, Nancy- has your oncs mentioned tamoxifen or arimidex yet? Am I missing anyone on herceptin?
Mel
I am so glad you are home and feeling better. DH’s can be blind sometimes. You have to tell them exactly just what you want them to do.
Last night after my taxol tx, I slept until 8:00, and when I woke I asked him if he would make dinner. He made hot dogs and beans for himself. I do not like hot dogs. He thought he was doing me a favor so I would not have to cook for him. He forgot about me. Lol. When I asked where is my supper, he asked me if I wanted blintzes. I love blinzes- they are like crepes. I buy them frozen and fry them- yumm- in a pinch. I got up and put them in a fry pan, assuming he would watch them. I went on the computer and in a few minutes smelled something burning. MY BLINZES!!! I called him and told him I thought he was making my “dinner.” He then said that I should have asked him to watch them. DUH!!!!! They can be thick sometimes. The moral is they need step by step directions and orders.
Have you worn your transitional gown yet? I am thinking of getting one. Is it comfortable or would a regular robe be just as good? I am glad you worked things out with your DH.

Rebecca,
That is so frustrating. They should be calling or writing your doctor who ordered the test, not you. Bureaucracy: “AAAAARRRRGGGGHHH” is right!
Jan,
Have fun at your DogsWalk for cancer tomorrow.
Oh Joni,
Congratulations!! I am so happy for you. That is such great news! Now you can really enjoy your Mediterranean cruise on October.
Volunteering sounds like fun. It gets you out of the house and also doing something you will enjoy. What a good idea.
I cannot believe how up you have sounded despite how you frightened you must have been. I am so glad you got such great news.
Mary,
Good for you for straightening the radiology department out. It certainly got their attention, especially if the doc called you.
Melia,
I am sorry your swelling is not better. Have you tried elevating your feet with a pillow? When I walk, my fingers swell up, but I haven’t noticed my feet giving me a problem yet.
Tina,
You too topless!! Good for you! Kids can drive you crazy sometimes. It was actually good that they ironed thinks out before you came home. You didn’t have to get involved, and things worked out. Perfect ending. If all their problems could work out that way……..

Viddie, glad you questioned the nurse. God, you'd think she'd be apologetic or offer an explanation for your fears...we are all WELL AWARE that the "numbers" are checked by two nurses, etc., but mistakes still happen. And this isn't baby aspirin!

Too much on the whooping cough. My daughters little K friend who always comes over to play, came while I was on chemo and told me her brother had "pertussis". I knew exactly what that was and had to laugh at her big term..her mom is a doctor. But I was thinking jeez, I hope she didn't catch that...

Thanks for the support on my son. Yes, Mel, he DID dive right into the deep end. Last night when he got home and we talked he told me that the mom (my friend) was pretty irate at him, saying "WHAT ARE YOU SAYING, MY KIDS A LIAAAAAARRRRRRRR?????". This "liar" accusation seems to really strike a chord in her because a neighbor girl last year called her son a liar over some totally stupid kid thing and her dander went straight up and she lit into the girl, 3rd grade. The girls mom would not speak to my friend for the better part of the last year, despite repeated apologies by my friend. My son's aware of that too. I told him to use this as a lesson, that you have to tread very lightly before saying ANYTHING that can even resemble an accusation.

Speaking of accusations, my SIL is trying to draw me into family drama again. Won't bore you w/all the details, but when Caya was talking yesterday, Caya and Cindy, I believe, about can stress bring this on... which theoretically, they say it can't... I have to wonder. I was under TREMENDOUS stress w/teh "IL" crew for the last four years. No more. Part of my new plan: will not deal w/those that drag me down.

Rebecca - glad you got that insurance co. straightened out. They must have a billing code for "wasting client's time"! It seems to be a bit of a game - deny first and see if it works - some may not complain.
Joni - what excellent news. You are healthy now. You have certainly not been a drag, you've coped with this admirably.
I too have wondered about the cancer/stress connection. I don't mean the having a demanding job/hectic life kind of stress, but the gut-wrenching problems kind of stress. My son had a spinal cord injury 7 years ago and uses a wheel chair. He was 21 at the time, and I have had a hard time accepting this for my child. It was a very stressful time and it took a good 3 years for him to get settled. Then last March my Mother commited suicide after 2 years of depression. Looking back, after my son's accident I was in quite a state for awhile - put on weight, especially around my middle, and I'm sure my cortisol levels were sky-high. 2 1/2 years ago I decided enough, and lost weight, started eating right and exercising. My dr. says cancer was there 8-10 years before diagnosis. Who knows? But I definitely want to learn to handle stress - emotional stress - better. I can't bleed for everybody anymore.

DH and I went to the Relay for Life yesterday. We helped set up during the day, and went to the "Survivors Banquet" in the evening, then I walked the survivor's lap. Met some wonderful people. They treated us like heros - I don't think of myself as a hero, that's for sure! It was very emotional. A woman and her two daughters spoke after the dinner about the dad's death from multiple myeloma. One daughter said - "I don't remember if my Dad's tools were in order, or if the car was clean - I remember the time he spent with me." I'm sure there was not a dry eye in the place. If cancer can teach us that, it's a lesson worth learning.

Good Morning all,
Feeling a bit better today. I think I was tired yesterday, physically and emotionally, and the swelling worried me; it got so bad so fast. But I elevated my feet and it is definately better today. My doc called about 6:30 last night, surprised me as his nurse had called earlier. He said the swelling worries him as it is a side effect of taxotere, not taxol. Now that seems odd. I read that it was a side effect, and Mel had it .... also another lady I know. Anyway, he said to keep my feet elevated as much as I can, and if it doesn't improve by Monday or if it gets worse, he wants to run heart tests and get me on a diuretic. Since it is definately better, I am not worried. I really fell apart with my husband though, and he was very sympathetic. I think it is just now hitting me that the breast is gone forever, and that I won't have a full head of hair til TG or so. It just all felt like so much. My husband suggested we just have a quiet weekend at home, not try to do much, and see how I feel Monday.

When I read about everyone's stress, I do realize that I have had it easy. A son in a wheelchair and losing a mother to suicide is so sad. But I think there is something to the idea that stress can trigger this. Who knows, we can never prove it. Somehow I need to just accept that it happened, that it could have been worse, that I am lucky in so many ways, and I need to shake this mood!

Melia

MELIA! This is so odd - my onc told me EXACTLY THE SAME THING when my swelling started up!! It's a side effect of taxotere, not taxol. Therefore, he pretty much ignored it the first few weeks. Same thing with my tearing problem - can't be the taxol, that's a side effect of taxotere! I got very upset after a while - after all, I wasn't making those things up. Finally, after I had a crying fit in the chemo room one day and the chemo nurses told him about it, he began to think outside the box a little bit. My symptoms still mystified him, because he said all along I acted like I was on Taxotere...but he finally accepted that I was different and started addressing my issues. And, he apologized, sincerely.

I think that cancer treatment is overall very rigid and governed by formulas and statistics. They all learn a certain set of rules, and work from those. And, sometimes you have to slap them upside the head to get them to think outside what they "know" to be true. I suspect it's an occupational hazard.

Anyway, I think it's very interesting that we even had the same WORDS said to us, exactly, when we presented with the same atypical complaints.

Mel, I think they are taught the same "words" in medical school. Do you recall me recently telling Lynn that my dr., VERBATIM, told me to start my Tamoxifen "in a few weeks"? Just like Lynn's. I swear, it's in Bedside 101... let patient feel like they have some control over their life.

YEA, JONI!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What wonderful news for you and your family. Start packing your bags, woman!

Hope this is a great weekend, celebrating the news, absorbing the relief. Turn on the radio to an oldies station, grab your husband and dance up a storm.

Cindy

Viddie, the next step would be to discuss this with your physician when you have your next appointment. They rely on the staff to handle everything and if they hear that the interaction was less than concerned/appropriate someone else probably will hear about it.

Remember, you are the consumer - not just the patient. I'd talk about the infusion concerns, the attitude of the nurse you spoke with on call-back and then the concerns related to how the whooping cough problem was handled. Or almost NOT handled by the center.

I have a concern about the infectious disease office closing. If they can't handle this somewhat 'minor' problem, there's no confidence that they'll handle a more extensive problem that affects more of the population. (I mean no inference that the concern over the whooping cough should be minor, just relatively minor in terms of number of affected persons.) As a member of the medical community, it concerns me.

Have a relaxing weekend, Viddie.

Cindy

Mary – Several people have told me that they gained weight on tamoxifen. I’d forgotten about that until you mentioned it. I’ve intentionally gained a few pounds to get up to my pre-bc weight so that I won’t be too skinny for diep. I actually liked the during-chemo weight better.

Tppj – yes, my oldest (she’s 6) just finished school last week, but the youngest is in daycare. Strep had been going around the 6 year-olds classroom since February – but my obsessive hand washing seemed to help avoid it. I guess I slacked off a bit after my counts went back up. Now they both have step (the oldest one started a temp tonight). Hopefully they’ll keep it to themselves. Back to the obsessive hand washing. I won’t slack off again.

Viddie – next time you go in mention it to your onc nurse (not in the chemo room) or your onc and see if you can get a less defensive reaction. I think it’s worth following up on for your own peace of mind. (LOL – I just saw that Cindy said something similar – “great minds think alike….. and fools seldom differ).

RobbinJaye – open sore? OUCH!!!! I hope that gets better soon.

Here's a pic of my DD and one of our dogs at the DogsWalk for Cancer this morning:

Jan your post popped in just as I was sending mine. Beautiful dog pic! And do watch that strep, maybe lots of extra hand-washing all around? - skye

Hi all,
Fellow Herceptinans,
Any of you on tamoxofen or arimidex yet? If not, have your oncs mentioned when they will start you? I will be on one of them, but she has not told me when I will start. I assumed it would be after I finish my herceptin, but I do not know.

Fellow taxolians,
On day 3 (Saturday) I start to feel yucky. On Friday I feel great and I have enormous energy. I can do anything: clean the house, food shopping, exercise, mow the lawn (but I don't-lol), take long walks, and I am very up. On Saturday & Sunday, I crash and feel very yucky all day. I know it is the decadron. Besides getting bloated on those days, my biggest conplaint is my mood. I am very very sad. I sometimes cry for no reason on these days. Not a happy camper at all. My question is did or do you all have that reaction, being sad enough to cry for no reason? Those feelings go away by Monday. I am an emotional see-saw on the weekends. I hate that decadron!!!! I do not think the ativan will make me feel any better- it is for anxiety. Any suggestions besides to grin and bear it? I know it is temporary and I tell myself that. Oh well, just whining. Thanks for listening.
Viddie

Skye - your avatar just changed to your new wig when I posted - it looks great. I think I am going out tomorrow to buy a shorter one - as I know it will be months before I will have enough real hair to wear out in public.

Skye, I love your new avatar! You look great - and even more like Leslie. Thanks for sharing the wonderful pic of the baby woodchuck - I hope he's ok. The photo really brightened my day. And yes, Caya, he IS much cuter than the you-know-what will be. You crack me up.

I want to share something - you guys may or may not think it's as cool as I do, but it really, really made me happy. After my surgery, I had lots of phone calls, cards, four bunches of lovely flowers, all kinds of good things from the wonderful people in my life. Even the gift of a song! But by far the best thing was what my mother and sister did for me - they adopted me a baby elephant!! I don't know if any of you saw the tv piece on the elephant orphan's project in Kenya, where they raise up the baby elephants (who age the same rate as humans) paired with keepers who stay with them 24/7 until they are old enough to be transitioned back into the wild. It was the most wonderful story. Anyway, you can adopt the orphan of your choice, and they send you pictures, and keeper's notes about how your baby is doing and behaving, and all kinds of info. I have a little girl elephant named Lempaute, who was born in October, 2006, so she's still a baby. She was found wandering all alone in an area where there were no elephants, so evidently was unable to keep up with her herd during a stampede. I've been smiling ever since I learned about this. Guess it takes a family member to know what quirky little thing will make you happy, huh? If anyone wants to check this stuff out, go to http://www.sheldrickwildlifetrust.org/index.asp - you can even see my little girlie.

Yes Mel, I remember being very irritable when the Decadron was wearing off about Sunday Afternoon, I had tx on Fridays, then I would feel horrible until Tuesday, Weird how you could practically set the clock by how you were going to feel. I went to a grad party this evening, I drank 2 beers! That's the first alcohol I had since well forever... There were 5 people there that had some sort of cancer including me that was obvious. 4 of us in scarves. So for once I was someplace where I wasn't alone. What I didn't understand is why they all had their eyelashes and brows and I don't! I can deal with my bald head I just really hate not having a normal face. OMG, I wore my puff ball boobs and I ended up in the restroom stuffing them into my purse. I will never ever wear those lousy things again. They creep up and just drove me crazy! Then I lost a button on my blouse and my port would show through. Fortunately, I got a jacket from my SIL's cousin, then I felt better and was able to enjoy the party. Well, getting sleepy, I'll see ya all tomorrow.