Truly Awful Recipes!

Come on.
You know what I'm talking about. Recipes that sound so bad that you are embarrassed to give out the recipe; Yet for some unfathomable reason--They work! In fact they are delicious. We all have them.

I ran across one today that sounds like a likely candidate.
I'm going to try it. Here it is; Plus a nice take on a slushy.
Susie
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From the Phila Inquirer

We know you're out there, you, the one person on this planet who cherishes and routinely prepares the recipe for lobster casserole from Classic Cooking With Coca-Cola. We know that you layer frozen artichokes, canned lobster, rice, and cream of mushroom soup in your best casserole dish, drench the whole business in bubbly cola, and cover it with festive triangles of American cheese.

We know that you can and will attest to the ooey-gooey, casserole-y, leave-you-roly-poly goodness of this concoction from the cookbook cowritten by a descendant of Coke founder Asa Griggs Candler.

But we're not going to republish the recipe because, frankly, we've found hundreds of others that tempt.

I've long heard about a Colombian dish of rice cooked in Coca-Cola, and I was finally able to track it down in the scholarly food journal Gastronomica.

The recipe is fascinating: You cook coconut milk until it reduces - first to a thick paste, and then until it breaks into oils and curdled solids, which brown and crisp. Then you add rice, cola and raisins.

The result? Moist, Coke-brown rice with a sweet, subtle caramel essence. Believe it or not, the coconut flavor trumps the Coke. It took some tinkering to get the desired effect. You should get the kind of coconut milk that separates into solids and water in the can rather than the smoothly emulsified coconut milk. A Taste of Thai brand, sold in mainstream supermarkets, and Chaokoh brand, sold in Asian markets, both work. You'll also need a heavy-bottomed enamel or cast-iron pot so you can reduce the coconut without burning it.

We also got creative ourselves and set out to invent a dish (OK - a cocktail) to commemorate the occasion.

And after a closer reading of Classic Cooking With Coca-Cola (Celebrity Books, $12.95), we did find some lobsterless gems well worth reprinting.

So let's raise a glass to Atlanta's most famous contribution to the world of food and drink. Tip it back, drink slowly, and don't laugh, or it'll go straight up your nose.

Arroz con Coco y Pasas

Makes 8 servings

3 (14-ounce) cans coconut milk

1 tablespoon oil, as needed

2 cups rice

1/4 cup raisins

2 teaspoons salt

4 cups Coca-Cola

1. Place the coconut milk in a large, heavy-bottomed pot. Bring to an active boil and continue cooking about 15 minutes over medium-high heat. Run a wooden spoon periodically around the bottom to make sure it isn't sticking. If so, turn down the heat a bit and keep checking.

2. When the coconut milk is as thick as frosting and the bubbles burst like moon craters, reduce the heat to medium and continue cooking. The mixture will turn glassy, and the bubbles will look like pinpricks.

3. Stir in a teaspoon of oil, and then another if needed, to encourage the mixture to break. Stirring constantly, let the mixture break into oil and solids.

4. Once the solid bits start to brown, take the pot off the heat and carefully transfer the contents to a heat-proof container. If using the heavy-bottomed pot to cook the rice, wash and dry it.

5. Add the remaining teaspoon oil to the pot along with the coconut mixture, rice and raisins and stir over medium heat for two minutes until rice glistens and is fragrant.

6. Add the salt and Coca-Cola. Bring to a boil; cover pot with a heavy, tight lid. Cook over medium heat for 10 minutes.

7. Reduce heat to low and cook another 10 minutes. Let rest 10 minutes before uncovering.

- Adapted from a recipe in Gastronomica: The Journal of Food and Culture (winter 2005)

Per serving: 591 calories, 7 grams protein, 62 grams carbohydrates, 4 grams fiber, 38 grams fat, no cholesterol, 563 milligrams sodium
Coke and Jack Slushies

Makes 4 servings

2 (12-ounce) cans cold

Coca-Cola

6 ounces limeade concentrate

6 ounces bourbon, chilled

1. Combine the cola and limeade with a whisk, then freeze in an ice cream machine according to manufacturer's directions.

2. Divide frozen mixture into four chilled glasses. Chase away the kids. Drizzle each serving with 1 shot of bourbon. Serve with a spoon or a straw.

- From John Kessler

Note: I set out to make a Coke sorbet but could never get a texture that held in the freezer. Yet one failed attempt yielded a delicious Coke and lime slushie. My kids loved it. I needed a little something to temper the sweetness. Then I saw that bottle of Jack Daniel's.

Per serving: 256 calories, trace protein, 39 grams carbohydrates, trace fiber, trace fat, no cholesterol, 7 milligrams sodium.