Starting Chemo in JAN 2007

Good Morning all:

Well it is really foggy here today, but hopefully the sun will come out and burn it off.

Melia, glad to hear you had a nice trip. It does sound like a s/e, but if the bendryl doesn't work, I would give the onc's office a call, they probably have something that can take it away pronto. No need to suffer.

TLC, I have been suffering with a bit of a fever since Friday, at least today it is gone, and now I'm back to normal. I have had this from the beginning of chemo, and I usually get it betweeen 5 and 10 days after chemo. They prescribed CIPRO for me. Skye, I think you are right about home thermometers, mine seems to register higher than the hospitals...by a few degrees....38.8 on mine 38.3 on theirs.

MizSissy, jealous of your eyebrows...that is what I want to come back soon.

Viddie, your comment on keeping in shape and now not enough to make the plastic surgery work, sure makes a person think.

I took different drugs to try to get pregnant, even tried the in vitro route to see if I could have kids, but all to no avail. Sometimes I wonder if I caused my own problems. The one drug I took 'danazol' put me into a pseudo menopause, and now they are saying HRT drugs also can cause BC. At the time, I thought I was doing the right thing. Also, sometimes I wonder if over the years I've had too many glasses of wine or one too many beers, but you know what, it doesn't do me any good now to go back and think like that, because I can't change it. Just have to keep plodding forward, and hope that my doctors now, know what they are doing.

Mary if find out the answer to the sun...let me know, especially what we are more prone to. PS...darn Red Wings.

Amera, I hear you on the comments from people. The florist lady at the Safeways here is one of my neighbours, and is always saying what an inspiration I am...gees...I'm here to get carrots, not conquer the world!!

Tina, sorry about your weekend. 12 years old is a tough age, and they actually expect everything nowadays, I think because in most cases they get it.

Nancy maybe your "loafer" stepson could help you with the garden, or run some errands for you, as all he is doing is laying around. Maybe you should take him one day to chemo so he can see how tough it is.

Rebecca...bbqs sound like fun, and you sound like you're up for it....have a great time.

Lynn, along with my dry mouth, I do have a bit of sinus problems, and it does sound like a clicking.

Hope everyone has a great day.

Hugs to all.

Joni

ps: Tae...I now have shiny red toes!! Hope you are feeling better!!

Melia,
She just mentioned that a rash could be a s/e. I asked her so many other questions, I forgot to ask her what to do if I got a rash. I would call tomorrow anyway if you still have a rash just to let them know. They might be able to give you something stronger to get rid of it.

Joni and TLC,
I was told that we can get fevers when our WBC are at their lowest. My oncologist also puts me on an antibiotic also if I have a fever to prevent an infection.
Joni:
Hmmm: If I gain enough weight, perhaps I can have a DIEP procedure. But what if all my weight goes to my boobs instead of my stomach!!! LOL

Have a nice day everyone,
Viddie

It's me again. Lynn, I wanted to tell you that I've also had the exact same feeling of waking up full (but hungry), and getting more uncomfortable when I eat. I don't know if it's just a sensation, or if I'm actually bigger, but I do have the feeling that I've just eaten a large meal. Of course, my weight is up a bit, but I think that is the swelling from the taxol. I'm certainly not eating much right now - if I'm gaining weight, I'm going to be really upset! I got all the way through to #11 taxol without gaining any weight at all - it wouldn't be fair to gain weight now that I'm done.

Viddie, I've heard two schools of thought on this, but some docs say there is no sense in gaining weight in order to qualify for a diep procedure because what ends up happening is that they grow and shrink as your body gains and loses weight. So if you gain weight so that you can have bigger diep breasts, and then lose it afterward, you will just lose the volume in your breasts at that time. Then again, other surgeons will have patients try to gain weight before the surgery, so who knows... I have a friend who is trying to gain now for her surgery.

Skye, congrats on having your last Taxol tomorrow - it's a great feeling to be done with chemo. As far as supplements go, I was taking a number of things before diagnosis, but even though my oncologist didn't make a big deal about it, I cut out everything except my calcium/vitamin D/magnesium when I started chemo, and added B6 in because I was worried about neuropathy - that was 100 mg. My onc said not to bother with the glutamine, so I didn't, although I bought some. I even stopped my multivitamin because it was a fairly high potency multi and I was concerned about the number of things in it which had antioxidant effects. I guess in a week or so I'll start back up on that, if it's ok with my PS, but honestly, I feel like I've gotten so many drugs poured into my system the past six months, and I don't want to take anything that isn't absolutely necessary.

Rebecca, I had to laugh at your comment about the word Ativan not even being WHISPERED in your oncologists office. It's not whispered in mine either! I must admit I've been a little jealous of the girls who got it, but it's probably better that I didn't have it because I would have taken it for sure.

Your comment about how we have had to cope with being diagnosed with cancer, and then on top of that had to cope with the end of treatment and all that goes with that was right on. I hadn't thought of it that way, but I have had a bit of an issue with that. It seems like I was just getting accustomed to thinking of myself as a *cancer patient,* and now suddenly I'm cut loose. Now what am I? I'm not getting treatment anymore - but when the wig comes off, and the makeup, I sure as hell look like a cancer patient! And finally, I FEEL like one, too. It's just confusing.

I seem to be talking too much this afternoon, but I'm not done so I'm going to post and then finish later.

Amera, I finished chemo Mar.7. I don't have a full head of hair - just some of it is 1/2" long! Still tired too - good for you with the step class.
I go back to work May 9, and we're going to BC May 1-5, so really, I only have this week. My daughter, grandaughter and I are going to the zoo on Wed. A year from now (right before our Canadian tax deadline of April 30) I'll be telling a different story!
I guess that some days are just darker than others. Can't change the past or see the future, today is all we have. The sun has come out and I feel better - makes me wonder how much of my mood is determined by hormones and the sun!

Quote:

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right?

Well, I have to be at the surgery center at 6:00AM to get those *&%^$# tubes put in my eyes. I have a feeling I'm going to hate them, and I hate the thought of another anesthesia and surgical procedure (not to mention going in with no makeup or eyebrows or lashes) but I am SO ready to be done with this constant tearing. So, wish me luck.

Hugs,
Mel

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Mel good luck with that operation! Is that for tearing you got from chemo, or a pre-existing condition?

Oh and regarding the Ativan. My Onc didn't offer it to me either. I did ask for it to supplement with the Ambien I already had prescribed for sleep. He only prescribed me 20 tablets with 1 refill. Right before tx #4, I had to see a different Onc in his office because mine was on vacation. We were discussing my bad nausea from #3 and he asked if I was taking Ativan. I said yes, but only at night. So he goes on his computer and sends a script to the pharmacy for 30 pills with 5 refills. A bit different than what my Onc gave me. Different opinions not only in different offices but within the same.

Hi all,
Thanks for the info/reassurance on the taxol rash. I just want this over with, don't want treatments delayed!

Re what we could have done differently: this is the way I look at it. It's like car maintenance. You check tires, brakes, get it regularly serviced. Then one day you are driving along minding your own business, and there is a rock or piece of glass in the road and your tire blows out. That's what happened to us. We need to make the repairs and move on. We didn't do this to ourselves, we were just living our lives the best we knew how. Sure, maybe we coulda, woulda, shoulda. But who knows if it would have made a difference?
Melia

"Your comment about how we have had to cope with being diagnosed with cancer, and then on top of that had to cope with the end of treatment and all that goes with that was right on. I hadn't thought of it that way, but I have had a bit of an issue with that. It seems like I was just getting accustomed to thinking of myself as a *cancer patient,* and now suddenly I'm cut loose. Now what am I? I'm not getting treatment anymore - but when the wig comes off, and the makeup, I sure as hell look like a cancer patient! And finally, I FEEL like one, too. It's just confusing."

I think you ladies are singing my song. We need to start a choir!

Having a foot in both worlds is so difficult. I wonder which way I'm going to slip. The good Lord knows I don't want to go backwards but it is a quandary how to claim a new position.

I never dreamed ending chemo treatment would start these questions in my mind.

Cindy

Hi Gals,

Checkin' in for the evening. Most of you are getting close to end of your treatment and on to the next phase, and wondering about the transition. Before I became a member of this group I posted all over the support site and got responses from women who were much further along than we are, and they said they liked being "in treatment." It made them feel safe, like they were doing something.

I took a Zyrtec last night and slept like a log...but it was kind of a drugged, foggy sleep. I think it helped break the pattern. I didn't dream as much as I needed to..I think what is really necessary in sleep is to dream and let your mind drift illogically, which my mind just won't do lately. But I feel very tired and relaxed like I'll get a good sleep tonite w/o drugs.

Spent part of the day outside raking and doing spring cleanup which is amazingly exhausting. I kept on having to take breaks from the heat and come down here to the basement to cool off...my hands were trembling very strongly, is this a taxotere SE? After I cooled off the shaking would go away.

Mary, I don't know about you but I have no doubt my cancer was the result of taking synthetic hormones. I was really overexposed, (1) to DES in the womb, which my mother said she took by the handful, (2) to lots of infertility hormones in a vain effort to get pregnant, and (3) birth control pills, early and late in life, to control periods (4) HRT up until the time of my dx, which included testerone, estrogen WITHOUT progesterone for a few years (which I found out is a no no). This is good & bad, because I wonder if all I needed to do what get off all the phony hormones to disable the cancer.

Skye...I am not very up-to-date so I don't know why you are getting tubes in your eyes at 6 am tomorrow but it probably sounds a lot worse than it is!! Good luck!!

Mel...I do think I need the antidepressants now..I hate to give up my prozac for tamoxifen. Maybe I should consider the AIs, though I hate the thought of dealing with bone loss.

Mizsissy

Hi Guys,

So many posts. I think I'll get up tomorrow am w/a big cup of coffee and see what you've all been up to.

The eye tubes are called Crawford tubes - they are usually put in babies. My tear ducts are almost totally blocked from the taxol, to the point that if they aren't opened up now I could be stuck with the tearing problem for the rest of my life. So, I have no choice but to do the tubes - they'll stay in for a while and then be removed in the office, or possibly they can fall out unintentionally (but I hope not). Anyway, I'll take all your wishes for good luck tomorrow.:)
Hugs,
Mel

THank you for your kind words, ladies - you are awesome. My daughter and grandaughter were here for a few hours - nothing like a 2 year old to keep you in the present.

As to the "why" we got bc, we may each have our theories that apply to us personally, but many others with the same risk factors - be they fertility drugs, hormone treatments, weight, drinking, etc - do NOT get bc, so who knew? I had my first child at 19 - that should have reduced my risk, but apparently not enough. Maybe if I would have had a child every 2 years for 30 years like my great-grandmothers...

Good luck tomorrow Mel - hope it helps.

Rebecca, you are right on about it being a big transition at the end of treatment. Being diagnosed was much worse, but this transition at the end may take awhile.

Skye,

Congrats on your big day today!!!

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With my thin light eyebrows and the few lashes I really remind myself of Lord Voldemort from the first Harry Potter movie.

MY SIL PUT COLOR ON MY BROWS YESTERDAY TOO...I WAS A LITTLE AFRAID THAT IT'D BE TOO HEAVY. WRONG. APPARENTLY NOT ONLY ARE MY BROWS JUST SUPER LIGHT/FADED COLORWISE, BUT THEY ARE A LOT MORE "GONE" THAN I REALIZED. WHEN I PUT THE COLOR ON THEM I COULD SEE ALL THE BARE PATCHES. NOW I HAVE TO FILL THOSE IN W/PENCIL.

Mel, good luck with the eye tubes; I will be thinking of you. And Skye, the LAST ONE. Good for you. We will all get there. Have a good day ...oh, and by the way, re the antivan. I had thought that I would ration them, cut back, etc, then decided one each evening is maybe what is getting me through this. I rarely have trouble sleeping. When it's all over, I will deal with any withdrawal, weaning off issues. Right now I need a crutch!
Melia