Fooling myself if I think this isn't going to be cancer

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Toyamjj
Toyamjj Member Posts: 151
edited October 2021 in Not Diagnosed With a Recurrence or Metastases but Concerned

Last week I posted about thickening along my incision line but since then, because I'm paying extra close attention I've now noticed a dent/dimple. A dent is exactly how I discovered the cancer before, I was trying to remain hopeful that it was just normal changes as a result of lumoectomy and radiation but seeing the dent has sent me over the edge. As moms we all jump to our children, mine are 18 and 21 and in college but still I feel heart broken for them. My aunt just had a severe stroke last night so my family is all at the hospital at her bed side, now they will most likely get more crushing news from me. I want to remain hopeful because in June I received a mammogram and ultrasound to check out the thickening and nothing showed up. Id like to feel some sort of comfort in a normal mammogram but I fear its just me being in denial

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  • ctmbsikia
    ctmbsikia Member Posts: 1,095
    edited October 2021

    T-It's good nothing is on your imaging. Breast tissue goes through post surgical changes and apparently this can happen over years. My dent/dimple didn't show up until year 2 and I swear the left radiated side is still shrinking! I went through/still am on the 6 months checks and had 1 biopsy which came back as fat necrosis. Do you recall bumping your breast or anything like that? That can do it too. Feel for you, it's hard to not think the worse case. Sorry about your Aunt.

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  • Toyamjj
    Toyamjj Member Posts: 151
    edited October 2021

    Thanks for responding! My breast isn't necessarily shrinking instead it feels fuller, I'm noticing my breast more. And now that I'm super concerned I've been really feeling around and it feels lumpy. My appointment is tomorrow and I'm so nervous I hope I can drive, its 45 minutes away. My husband is out of town for business but honestly even if he were here I would probably go alone. I don't want to alarm my family till I know for certain something is wrong. This is such a horrible feeling

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  • edwards750
    edwards750 Member Posts: 3,761
    edited October 2021

    Bless your heart we know you are scared. Perfectly understandable. As BC patients I think the vast majority of us fear the worst for any ailment.

    At my last mammogram the tech asked me if had gained weight because obviously one breast was bigger than before. I had gained like 8 lbs(ugh)but I was relieved it was from weight gain and not something more ominous.

    Try to keep the faith and keep us posted.

    Diane

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  • Toyamjj
    Toyamjj Member Posts: 151
    edited October 2021

    Diane,

    I actually have gained 10 pounds the past month! Im such a clutz, on 9/4 I broke my pinky toe while at an outdoor concert. Had to wear a boot and couldn't do anything rigorous the past month. Finally got the boot off and have been back in the gym the past couple days, I have dropped two of the the ten pounds :) Oh boy I sure do hope the weight gain is the reason for my breast feeling fuller :)

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  • Toyamjj
    Toyamjj Member Posts: 151
    edited October 2021

    Update!!!!

    Had an appointment with my breast cancer doc this afternoon, She gave me a Manuel exam and said everything feels normal for a radiated breast but because my history she sent me for a mammogram and ultrasound. Thankfully they were able to get me right after and the mammogram ad ultrasound both came back benign! Thank You Lord and thanks to you ladies for chiming in and helping me get through the dark thoughts. My husband is out of town but a friend met me out for a celebratory glass of wine or two ;)

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  • 2019whatayear
    2019whatayear Member Posts: 767
    edited October 2021

    great news

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