TRIPLE POSITIVE GROUP

Hi Redcanoe - I’m sorry to hear that your dealing with multiple issues while getting through your treatment. Does your oncology center have social services available? Some centers have group activities as well as psychologists available to help. I hope your oncology nurse is able to help.

We have services available through the oncology center. I’ve been walking everyday now that the weather is nice, but was still dealing with anxiety. I recently started meditation (headspace app on iPhone) and will be trying Reiki therapy next week.

Sending you healing vibes and gentle hugs.

redcanoe - your diagnosis is mine, and your treatment as well - hoping that my presence here ten years out provides you some reassurance that you will get through the cancer part. I fully understand how the physical manifestations can rock your confidence - I struggled with reconstruction complications that left me at times with one flat side for many months, it is not fun, and I get it. If it helps try to think of your situation with your divorce as a separate issue from your cancer - try not to link them in your mind as sadness about one can create more sadness about the other and it becomes a spiral. Also, try not to allow your soon-to-be ex-husband's poor decision making and lack of responsibility or fidelity to have any reflection on you - that is on him. Don't give his bad behavior the space to sap your limited reserves. His lack of sensitivity about the timing of his introduction of the new girlfriend to your children and in-laws just adds to his asshat credentials, sheesh. I am so sorry that these things are happening simultaneously with your treatment, which is hard enough under the best of circumstances. Being a parent takes so much energy while going through treatment so free time is likely at a premium, but mindfulness and meditation can be helpful in focusing your limited emotional and physical resources to carry you through this hard time. Right after chemo I participated in a study about stress hormones and coping that was based on MBSR (Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction) and the book by Jon Kabat-Zinn, Full Catastrophe Living. What I learned was helpful in allowing me to live in the moment and not looking back at the past with regrets or looking forward to the future with uncertainty, which somehow made things easier once I got the hang of it. If you Google the author you can learn about this concept and it might be helpful for you. If you can't muster the energy I understand that too - just know we care. Wishing you the best.

SpecialK- thank you for this. I do feel encouraged every time I see your signature. My confidence has taken a major blow and I'm sorry that happened to you too. It's nice to hear that it gets better with time. I will look that author up.

Cowgirl- it's hard to separate my feelings between the cancer and the divorce. I went on Lexapro when I was an anxious mess about my diagnosis. I lost almost 20 pounds in less than a month. This feels different, more like situational and im trying to work through my feelings before upping my dose. I'm in a negative thought loop. I talked with my oncology social worker for a good hour today. I will consider it if I'm still crying daily in a month or if I stop eating again.

Hi Redcanoe

You are absolutely not alone in having cancer in your nodes....I also had a whole bunch of it, even after chemo, and with plenty of extra ominous signs to boot. It would be great to have clear nodes and enjoy the thought of a better prognosis...but it is what it is. You are also not alone on suffering from depressive moods after diagnosis. My cancer was found in my nodes from the start and I was convinced that it had spread and I would be dead in months. My kids (twins) were 10 years old, now about to turn 14. I lost 10 or 15 pounds in short order after diagnosis, because I was incapable of eating due to anxiety. I was put in antidepressants by the oncologist. Down the road, when I finished treatment and was in a better place, I talked to a psychiatrist (specialized in oncology) about the treatment, and we made a plan to wean off the antidepressant. He also recommended meditation and I joined a meditation group for cancer patients run by the hospital, and I am still in that group. Meditation is life changing. Do you have family and friends you can relay on to support you?

Re your husband, the wise SpecialK has spoken. I second every word she said about him and about everything. What the father of your children did reflects on him, not on you. He will continue to be in your life as the father of your kids, but clearly you don't need a partner like him. Good luck to her new girlfriend! If your in-laws aren't embarrassed to death at the moment by the son they raised, they can't be normal people.

Re looks after surgery, I had a first mastectomy, then reconstruction was delayed like 9 months during which I was very lopsided and nipple-less on one side. Then I had a second mastectomy and again lopsided for a while. Then nipple-less for like a year on both sides. Now I have fake nipples -tattoos- on my fake boobs. My boobs are visibly fake, very noticeable when I am naked, and I am naked around other people a bit because I am a swimmer and....showers and locker rooms. I am now used to the sight of me naked with my fake boobs and all the scars, and I couldn't feel better about myself and how I look. The people who really love you don't give a F about your boobs being uneven after going through cancer. With four kids you clearly have a lot to live for. You can live without boobs.

One day at a time!

LaughingGull

PS incidentally I stumbled today on Kate Bowler's podcast, which this week is about how we lack the language to console people going through divorce. You may want to give it a listen. Kate has stage IV cancer, she was diagnosed at 36, and she has a young kid. I recommend her podcast. The podcast is named "Everything happens"

Hello, all,

I had a check-in with my MO yesterday, and she said my last Herceptin/Perjeta treatment would be in July, at the one-year mark from when my treatment began. I missed one dose of HP back in December when I had a bad bout of mouth sores and they didn't want to pile on, and at that time I was told they'd just add the treatment on at the end, so I assumed I'd have one more treatment in August. I know HP is supposed to be given for one year and for not more than 18 cycles. I'll end up having 17 cycles if we don't tack the one I missed onto the end. My MO says that's fine and I'll be done in July because that will be a year. Does that seem fine? Should I push for the 18th cycle? I would assume that studies have indicated that 18 cycles is optimal, but maybe one year is really what matters? But, like, what if I'd missed two? Surely at some point they'd want to make sure I made up what I'd missed, so I just don't really understand why they don't just do the maximum number of cycles. Is it an insurance thing?Anyone else have clarity on this?

Thanks

Different oncs count the year differently - I had a total of 17 and missed none, but I have seen others have 18. I would seriously doubt whether missing that 18th dosing is going to matter. It may indeed have to do with the 12 month elapse and insurance if the 18th dose falls outside that window.

tld - what is your Vitamin D level? If your calcium is high and Vit D low, ask your MO or primary care to run a parathyroid panel.Is your higher calcium a sustained high, or is this a one time event? My calcium was occasionally above the range during the time I was on Prolia but it always came down again.

SpecialK, do you remember if yours was near 10.4? If it happened to you, and all was well, that will give me some hope right now.

My vitamin D runs low so I take 2000 a day. I went in for a port flush yesterday and had a sudden shortness of breath and chest pain. They called an ambulance and I was swiftly taken to the hospital because the NP thought I had a pulmonary embolism caused from the blocked port (for some reason, it would not let blood flow). No blood clot showed up in ct scan and the pain eventually went away but the scan did show two nodules in my lungs. Also, the bloodwork looked fine other than the calcium. I have osteopenia, hence the prolia. I had my 2nd dexa scan last fall and it was fine. I had a friend die this morning from breast cancer - hers had spread and she suffered for quite a few years. I guess yesterday's events, the nodules, the calcium level, and my friend passing away, have sent me over the top with fear this evening. I'm sorry for sounding so urgent - if I could hug you right now, SpecialK, I would!

The hospital lab marked it as high (their lab said it should not be higher than 10.2) and my oncology NP noted it because I'm on Prolia and it should "not" be high, and I made the mistake of googling it and freaked out at 5:15 tonight after she was already gone for the day. Grateful for your response as well! Thank you for taking the time to respond!!

i just checked my labs and the standard they use is 8.6-10.4 as normal range for calcium

The range they have on the report is 8.8 - 10.2 for calcium. I'm 54. I am just floored that it could still be high while on Prolia! I will definitely search through older posts! Very grateful for this forum and especially you ladies that have responded!

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I had my 6th HP treatment yesterday and experienced pancreatitis pain. It last about 90 minutes and I didn’t go to the ER. I’ve had pancreatitis in the past, had lots of testing and they’ve chalked it up to idiopathic cause. I eat a low fat diet, don’t drink and had my gallbladder removed 9 years ago. Anyone else experience pancreatitis while on chemo?

nsbrown - I didn't have any issues with that, and sorry that you had pain, ugh. Mostly wanted to post because of your new cute avatar - look at your hair!!