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weesa
weesa Member Posts: 707
edited April 2021 in Stage III Breast Cancer

Every once in a while I'll read about somebody forgetting her cancerversary and writing about it belatedly. They usually say something like, "yikes it was last month and I forgot all about it." I always thought this was the ultimate mature cool thing, indisputable evidence of a thoroughly healthy psyche. Me, on the other hand, have the date of November 25th scorched on my hippocampus. I start counting down in August and make sure I post here about it around November 20th on the 15 year thread. And usually I get together with several girlfriends, mix up a large watering can of Knock You Naked Magaritas, and get toasted. I can't forget. So I thought.

Welp, this year my cancerversary was the day before Thanksgiving. I did the unthinkable and just got busy with cooking. I do sorta feel a bit cooler, a bit more healed. More of a grown-up. I've always obsessed about my breast cancer, but have found it is just another layer in the onion that is me. No point in trying to stop obsessing. That layer is well entrenched. I seem to function ok on top of that layer, having laid down a few more over it. But still, I might qualify as a neurotic wonder. 18 years and I still feel bc sneaking back up on me.

Do you worry about worrying?

Or, does your anniversary slide by, unnoticed?

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  • MountainMia
    MountainMia Member Posts: 1,307
    edited December 2020

    weesa, you are super cool. WAY cooler than I am. But I'm still pretty new in the span of obsessing on my cancer, and still hoping to lay down some more layers like you have. Congrats on your anniversary, and I wish you many more!

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  • sugarplum
    sugarplum Member Posts: 318
    edited February 2021

    Weesa my hero - you've ALWAYS been cool to me. My dad was a jazz musician from Seattle, and his tag line was "be cool at all costs" - something to which I've only been able to aspire. I am one of those who starts anticipating my cancerversary half a year in advance. Not quite able to post on your 15-year thread, but remaining ever hopeful. That is, unless the pandemic or heart disease or the proverbial bus doesn't get me first!

    So wonderful to see you hit 18 years - rock on, my friend.

    Julie

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  • Newnorm
    Newnorm Member Posts: 100
    edited December 2020

    Oh Weesa, I so enjoy reading your posts. Practical, realistic and with a touch of humour, but always sympathetic to the challenges of BC. Don’t worry, you’re not alone. I can relate, albeit I’m still relatively new to the survivorship journey. I also think I must be more obsessed than most and still feel chuffed with myself if a day goes by where I don’t think about it more than once. Just when I think I’m getting back to normal, another ache pops up to throw me off course. Gotta love getting old. Where most people just deal with age related issues,mine always bring that question; is it a recurrence? So far I’ve dodged that bullet and hope to for many years. Still pray I see my kids graduate high school. Love to all who continue to wrestle with the mind games. Xxx

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  • lkc
    lkc Member Posts: 1,203
    edited December 2020

    Hi Weesa.

    KYNM margaritas !!! I so understand .. For me, I usually simply forget the date as well as soooo many other things. I live in forgetful bliss-land quite happily ! Pomegranate Cosmos help.. Love seeing you here.


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  • weesa
    weesa Member Posts: 707
    edited February 2021

    Thank you all for responding to my neuroticism confession. It's great to see Sugar Plum and IKC here--when I know you both are ok, I figure I must be, too.I know it doesn't make rational sense since you are a bit behind me in years, but that's how I feel when I see you post. Nice to see relatively new people, new to the career of wondering...Prolly ok. For me, there's no stopping it.

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  • karen1956
    karen1956 Member Posts: 6,503
    edited March 2021

    Weesa - I start thinking about it late January when I got the call back. I don't think I'l ever forget. It was life changing. Tomorrow is 1 year since my DH had quintuple bypass and today he was telling me how emotional he was feeling today. I get it.

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  • faithfulheart
    faithfulheart Member Posts: 544
    edited April 2021

    Weesa sweet awesome Weesa!!

    So I was 11 years in October 2020.......so now going on 12years ...wow I see some of the old gang ia here!

    worry worry worry.....its part of the deal I guess. it just does not want to completely go away!!!

    Oh its very different from the early days of panic and I supposed if I were the good poster child of bc like I should be I would prolly not worry as much!! HOWEVER NO MARRATHON RUNNING HERE.... lots of good food and cocktails ! my Onc took me off femara told me I went over my 10 years and the risk of me being on it was now out weighing the benefits! I don't know how I feel about this though , Weesa are you still on an AI ??? I feel like my safety net was taken from me a bit..... but life goes by day by day by day!!!! and we are all still here to complain about it... I think that's called surviving Cancer!!!!

    We do the best we can with this disease. non of us want it back , I pray for all of us that it is gone forever!!

    Lets lift our virtual Margarita to our fabulous funny amazing Wessa!! I love you Girl!!!!!

    Love to all old and new!!!!!!!

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  • TectonicShift
    TectonicShift Member Posts: 752
    edited July 2021

    The ten-year thing is really a problem. One of my doctors told me he's seen so many patients recur after going off the AIs. I want to stay on forever but my current oncologist is not onboard with that. I might have to switch oncologists, although he's great and I like and respect him. He's very by the book. I'm not convinced stopping the AI is a good idea for stage IIIc hormone positive.

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  • faithfulheart
    faithfulheart Member Posts: 544
    edited April 2021

    Well......TectonicShift.........That makes me feel yucky !!!!!

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  • TectonicShift
    TectonicShift Member Posts: 752
    edited July 2021

    I know - I"m sorry!

    My oncologist who said that - it's just anecdotal on his part. Not hard data. But still it is worrying.

    OTOH it is true that they don't have data to support going longer than 10 years. I don't know what I'll do. There certainly is a price to pay for being on AIs.

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  • Claire_in_Seattle
    Claire_in_Seattle Member Posts: 4,570
    edited April 2021

    Just seeing this thread, Weesa, and it sounds like you are continuing to thrive. I would love to try out one of your KYNMs. Fridge miirror given to me during chemo by a friend who had been there; Zero to Naked in 1.5 Bottles. (Though don't try this with a guy if you want action.)

    Anyway, other things do happen in life and breast cancer does fade into its proper place.

    What I would love to know is whether you still have your car? I still have Rexxie (my 2003 Subaru WRX) who is getting a transmission rebuild - worn and noisy bearing. So I am semi-stranded. (Wish I could get a couple of "bearings" replaced!) Need to get ready as a friend is picking me up to do the Tulip Pedal. Most glorious day for this in years.

    Meanwhile, keep the celebration going, and Cheers!!!

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  • fondak
    fondak Member Posts: 376
    edited April 2022

    TechtonicShift I feel the very same. I switched oncologist when my original oncologist wanted me to come off the AI after being over my 5 year mark. She told me about a new study out. I loved this doctor and thought I would also love to be off of AI's but I wasn't comfortable. Hoping to find more comfort with not taking it, I asked her if the study consisted only of stage 3 breast cancer participants or a mixture of stages. She hesitated and started keying in things on her computer and then said it really didn't matter. Then said the study included all stages and couldn't tell me specifically how the women who were stage 3 did compared to the others. I explained I wasn't comfortable with the study because stage 1 and stage 3 aren't at the same risk of recurrence but she wouldn't budge.

    I found a new oncologist who was amazing and made big contributions to breast cancer studies. He wanted me on it as long as I could tolerate it. Now, he's retired. I just showed some bone loss on my last dexa scan. I'm still not at osteoporosis but I don't know if the new doctor will let me stay on it if I don't start Prolia which the doctor she referred me to for the bone loss is insisting on. I really don't want to start that because I can't stop once I start it without risking vertebrae fractures. So, I'm going to have to see how this will play out.

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  • muska
    muska Member Posts: 1,195
    edited April 2021

    @ fondak

    Hi fondak, could you elaborate on your comment about vertebrae fracture? Why do you believe you would get one if you start and then stop Prolia at some point?

    I stopped Prolia last year after four years / eight injand am doing just fine so far.

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