How did you decide to go flat or reconstruct?

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saltmarsh
saltmarsh Member Posts: 227
edited April 2021 in Surgery - Before, During, and After

Hey peeps,

I have a surgical date set for the 19th. They recently told me they have to take my whole breast, not just do a lumpectomy. Here's what I'm confused about: How am I supposed to make decisions about reconstruction before we even know how bad the cancer is? Supposedly people with my kind of cancer often end up with it in both breasts, but they only see one right now, so they only want to take one off. But I could end up needing that one removed later.

I guess part of my quandary is: If they had to take both right now, I'd consider just going flat. But if they're only gonna take one, it will really bother me to be lopsided. I just don't want to end up in a situation where I go through the cost and pain of reconstruction, only to find out later they're gonna remove the other one, and I could have skipped all that and been flat.

Another piece is: If this ends up being "just a bump in the road" when I look back on it later, as one doctor said, then reconstruction might feel worth it, but if it's gonna end poorly, I'm not interested in extra pain and recovery time in the meanwhile, know what I mean?

I'm meeting with a plastic surgeon the 13th to see what she says my options are. But I feel like we're forced to make a really big decision (or several, really) without a whole lot of information. How did you all decide this stuff?


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  • exbrnxgrl
    exbrnxgrl Member Posts: 12,424
    edited April 2021

    saltmarsh,

    Whether to reconstruct or not is not only a personal decision but a medical one in some cases. What type of bc do you have that often ends up in both breasts? Of course this can happen but my understanding is that it is not common, but I am no medical expert. I think that once you look at all the medical considerations, factual no supposedly, your decision might become clearer. Please remember however, that regardless of what you know today, there are no guarantees with bc (not a helpful statement but true).

    I didn’t face the same decisions you are facing. I only had bc in one breast but did have calcifications in the other so I had a bmx, though I could have gone with a single. How did I decide? Pure gut instinct, it felt like the right choice for me and since I’m almost 10 years down the road I can say it was the right one for me. All the best

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  • LivinLife
    LivinLife Member Posts: 1,332
    edited April 2021

    Welcome saltmarsh! exbmxgrl is right on about this being a very personal decision. So take in anything you read on this forum or elsewhere, try it on, gather more info on your medical situation and decide what you are most comfortable with. I made my decision by lots of reading on this site - and taking some time to think about it. You're right there's not a lot of time though it was enough... when I knew what was right for me I just knew.... I'm not sure how old you are... sometimes that can make a difference, sometimes not.... I had to have a MX - couldn't have radiation and I'm 58 so couldn't have a lumpectomy without rads... way too risky at my age. I too didn't want one large droopy breast and was not willing to go through more surgery for reconstruction due to a myriad of other medical issues. I had multiple call-backs and two stereotactic biopsies on that "other breast" as well. So I opted for a BMX.... If I were younger I may have (may have) opted for something different???? I have no regrets about going flat - it's been freeing and made life easier for me. Having large breasts was uncomfortable and more so as I got older.... Best in your decision making....

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  • Spookiesmom
    Spookiesmom Member Posts: 9,568
    edited April 2021

    I simply wasn’t interested in any more surgeries, pain, copays, risk of infection. Told BS they both had to go. He mumbled a bit, but took them both. I don’t regret it for a minute.

    That was the right decision for me. It’s a decision only YOU can make, don’t let some dr talk you into something else. Read around here, the good, bad, and ugly. Same goes for reconstruction

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  • SummerAngel
    SummerAngel Member Posts: 1,006
    edited April 2021

    I agree with the other responses, you need to go with your gut when it comes to reconstruction. I did have cancer in both breasts (and, no, it isn't common), and was told that I needed a BMX due to the number of issues they saw in both breasts. I just knew that it would be better for me emotionally to have reconstruction. I had been very happy with my real breasts and the thought of going flat made me sad. When I finished reconstruction and got my nipple tattoos (that look amazingly real) it gave me a peaceful feeling. I have no regrets and have had no complications. Keep in mind that you could get a single mastectomy and reconstruction, and then later have the reconstruction removed if you don't like it.

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  • saltmarsh
    saltmarsh Member Posts: 227
    edited April 2021

    Thanks, folx. I'm only 44, and while I never really thought of my breasts as one of my best features (lol), I have always preferred symmetry. I like it in architecture, in design, and in my body whenever possible. So I know I want both sides to end up matching, one way or another. That's all I'm super-clear on. I guess I just need to see what my PS says is possible, and go from there!

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