Spinal mass could be recurrence

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I was here 8 years ago after being diagnosed with ILC andhad hoped (respectfully) to leave it behind forever but now, after months of severe back pain, an MRI has shown an intradural heterogeneous mass in my spinal canal. Today I go in for a contrast MRI but I can tell that the doctors think it is cancer and probably BC back again, even though this a rare type of recurrence. I’m having difficulty with the pain but much more difficulty with the anxiety and grief. Wondering if it is throughout my body and I’ll have only months or even weeks to live. I don’t know how I’m going to get through all this without totally falling apart. Sorry, I know this is for actually diagnosed but this is more than just “concerned” too.

Comments

  • ctmbsikia
    ctmbsikia Member Posts: 1,095
    edited January 2021

    Amberella, I am so sorry you are back here. Good luck today with your MRI. Hope you know soon what's going on. Hang in there! We'll be here

  • Beesie
    Beesie Member Posts: 12,240
    edited January 2021

    Amberella, I'm sorry that you are going through this. We're all here with you. Good luck with the MRI. I think that these things can be benign - my Dad had something similar - so hopefully that's the case here, although of course it would still be something you will have to deal with.


  • 2019whatayear
    2019whatayear Member Posts: 767
    edited January 2021

    the anxiety is overwhelming, i hope the MRI itself isn't painful and that you get results asap

  • LivinLife
    LivinLife Member Posts: 1,332
    edited January 2021

    Just want to check in too Amberella.... Please let us know how things went today.... Your worry is not unreasonable and hopefully it ends up being a not to worry....

  • Amberella
    Amberella Member Posts: 6
    edited January 2021

    Thanks for the support 🙏. MRI went OK - 45 mins! I hope I get the results early next week. Not knowing is driving me crazy. I go from being sure I have Mets throughout my brain and spine (and everywhere else) to thinking it must be a benign tumour. I’m in tears half the time. Have started making lists of all the things to get ready - will, investments, etc etc. I thought the techs looked at with pity (it’s bad!) but maybe they were just being caring.

  • KMom57
    KMom57 Member Posts: 252
    edited January 2021

    Amberella, I’m thinking of you. On the techs, Maybe it’s not that they saw something bad. Maybe they just read your fear, and felt badly for you, or have compassion that you are going through this at all. Anyone with a heart would.

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