Greetings from Azerbaijan) worries about control...

Hello Yulka,

Nice to meet you. Are you Armenian by any chance? My Armenian grandparents were originally from Kessab, Syria. My grandmother survived the Genocide of the last century. Hoping you are staying safe after all of the unrest in Azerbaijan.

I will pray for you that your follow up appointment will show that you are free of cancer. It sounds like you got the recommended treatment that would be provided here in the United States.

MountainMia gave some good advice. Try to keep busy with exercise and doing things you enjoy. Nice that you enjoy biking and roller skating. Try to do that more. My husband still roller skates!

It is very normal to be anxious. Please try to relax and I will keep you in my prayers. You should do fine. Also, your English is just fine.

Take care, Pat

Hi Yulka, and welcome to Breastcancer.org!

We're sorry for the reasons that bring you here, but we're really glad you've found us! As you can already see, our amazing Community is full of incredible members always willing to offer advice, support, and encouragement -- we're all here for you!

Thank you for introducing yourself and sharing your story. We look forward to supporting you and getting to know you!

--The Mods

yulka, there is a pragmatic type of therapy called cbt - cognitive behavioral therapy - which can really help reduce anxiety about things we cannot control. If your anxiety is interfering with your sleep or work or just enjoyment of life, let your dr know and seek out a trained cbt therapist. It can be done via zoom

Best wishes

Hello Yulka,

So glad you posted. Many good ideas here already. I just wanted to say that I can really relate to your anxiety about scans as I'm sure many can. I have found mindfulness practices to be helpful--bringing awareness to breathing or sounds or physical sensations, eventually experiencing that thoughts and emotions are also things that can be observed, trying to notice whatever is here in the present moment, without judgment, as best I can. As a small taste, there is a short, simple, and calming practice called Take 5 breathing that you can find on the Internet. Also, when I am in the MRI or CT scanner, I often try to focus my attention on the physical sensations from where my body is contacting whatever it's resting on and then try to stay with the direct sensation/s as best I can. I also do this lying in bed sometimes, or sitting in a chair. And when the mind wanders, gently bringing it back to the breath or sensation as many times as is needed (which can be a lot--that is natural and perfectly ok!)

Regular exercise has helped me with anxiety quite a bit as well, as has finding time to be out in nature.

And yes, the pandemic adds another layer of stress for sure. I hope you can find ways to do some of the things that make you feel nurtured and content.

I am sending you wishes for a healthy, happy, and peaceful 2021. Enjoy your little one.

PS Depeche Mode is great!! Enjoy the Silence!