thread for middle age to older Christian women.

Nancy, praise God for the great news about the VA. So happy you are getting this resolved and will also be able to see your mom soon. Hallelujah!

Most of the traditional fireworks displays in San Diego are cancelled this year, but our beaches are the few that are open, which means large crowds as people will come from up north (Orange County and LA). The boys in the condo below us were out talking loudly until 3:15 am this morning--I have a pending formal complaint and this is the third weekend in a row after 2:30! Our quiet curfew is 10:00 am. The firecrackers in the neighborhood were also going on past 3--going to be a long night!

We could hear, but see no fireworks!

Thank you for asking, Nancy. HR has not provided any information or the waiver forms to employees. I am growing a bit concerned that everyone will be expected to report and work onsite beginning August 3rd. That date is still four weeks away though, and situations change. My patience muscles will be getting a good workout.

Our neighborhood fireworks lasted until 2am. At times it was like being at Disney World (the rockets were that powerful). I hope folks set off all the fireworks that they had. A repeat performance tonight will be rough.

Hershey, I sure hope you can continue to work from home. Aug. 3 (which happens to be my birthday) is coming pretty quickly for them not to be planning on who will work. Maybe they are assuming everyone will go back to normal. That would not be good from what you have said about the close quarters for the workers.

Ade, I am glad you were able to have a cookout with your son's family. I made it to my Mom's house alright. There is an unbelievable amount of road construction on my main route. I remember telling my family about it at Christmas time saying this is not going to be a weeks or months project but probably years and I still hold to that. I didn't have massive delays but the traffic going back north which I will be doing on Thursday was a nightmare. Traffic backed up for miles. So I will brace myself.

I hope Maggie did not stress herself out too much. Cammie was like a cat on a hot tin roof. She was so jumpy after also being home alone on the night of the 4th that when I did get back home she was so scared of any little thing. I am sure this is not helping her GI stuff.

As much as I tried to prepare for seeing my Mom nothing went the way I had hoped. We ended up both outside on their covered big porch that goes around their facility. My Mom has to walk a pretty long ways with her walker to get to where we were. She has not been eating for months and only drinking Ensure and eating cookies so I knew she had gone downhill from what my sister had told me. There is nothing like seeing it for yourself. She looked awful and when she saw me in a mask she said this isn't my daughter. She thought she was going to see my sister I think. Then I looked at her closer and said this is Nancy. Then she turned to one of the workers and said this is my baby. So I knew she knew me then. The poor thing was so anxious and confused and we hadn't sat for two minutes and she said when are we going to go inside. The she said I am just worn out. This went on for our whole visit and I finally cut our visit short . It was only 20-25 min. and I buzzed for someone to take her back.

One of the CNA's stayed behind to talk to me in private. She is my most favorite one and the first one we met when my Mom entered the facility on Jan. 8 , 2018. She is so good with my Mom and so patient and loving. She said the appetite stimulant was a waste of money. It was only making her cravings for sweets more but nothing in the way of eating nutritious foods. She said your Mom has been like this basically all the time now about being worn out and wanting to sleep. So I was absolutely devastated and disheartened when I left. I thought the end is near for her.

Then today I went and this was an absolute miracle. There was only a 20% chance of rain this afternoon and as soon as I left her house I noticed the sky was all dark right where I was headed. I ran into a really heavy rain storm and the route I was on was completely flooded. I just prayed that when I got to my Mom's facility which takes 30 min to get there that the rain would completely stop. When I got pretty near her place the rain not only stopped but the feel like 100 temp had gone down to 71 on my car but was rising as I finally got there. So I had to bring my own chair so I put my things on her patio and my Mom was lifting up the blinds waving at me. I was so tickled. This is more normal behavior. So other than the fact that she could hardly hear me I had also asked the Lord that she would appreciate me being there and we would have a nice visit. I asked her if she wanted me to visit tomorrow and she said oh yes. So even though I had to cut our visit short again because she really was tired and wanted to sit in her Lazy Boy chair I would say only ten minutes until Andy Griffith comes on. I kept saying now five minutes. That seemed to work. So today I felt much better about her and then stopped by my sisters and spent many hours with her and her husband.

When I got home Cammie was fine and then not too long after I was there she had terrible diarrhea again. So now I am concerned about her all over again.

No one ever said our lives would be easy!!!!! My tummy is kind of in a mess as well but I have been doing carry out only not knowing for sure what time I would be seeing my Mom.

I am so grateful how the Lord answered my prayers and lifted my spirits today. So completely grateful over the VA decision. I have not even had time to study this document like I thought I would. We may be able to add another level of care with this money as my Mom really needs help with dressing now. So we'll see. God has really showed me this whole journey we have taken with my Mom. I could see each challenge and chapter and remember how the unknown of each leg of the journey had caused some anxiety and how God showed up and made a way for us. I know that this last leg of the journey He will do the same as he prepares us for the final leg of the journey.

Sorry this got so long winded. I guess I needed to share as I am in this house all alone with Cammie with all of these emotions and needing to share them.

Thank you for indulging me in this. Have a good rest of the week dear sisters.

Love,

Nancy

Nancy, I’m so glad you finally were able to see your mom, even if it wasn’t completely satisfying. At least, it might give you some peace to at least see her. I’m sure these last days are difficult but God always seems to find a way to help you. It’s wonderful that you may be getting extra help from the VA. That has to give you some peace of mind. Have a safe trip home tomorrow and I pray the traffic isn’t terrible for you.

Sending prayers for all of you and also asking for some prayers for my GI issues. They have been ongoing for awhile now and nothing I do or change seems to help. My PCP gave me a new med for IBS but it doesn’t seem to help much and I’m having an ultrasound of my gallbladder next week. Maybe that’s the problem. I’m just so tired of always feeling nauseous. I have canceled several appointments because I just feel lousy. All your prayers are gratefully appreciated.

Love and prayers,

Faith (in the future)

Hi dear sisters.

I have read all of your posts and appreciate your love and support. I am packing to leave. All in all it was a good visit with my Mom and my sister and her DH. I would appreciate prayers for this trip. There is so much construction and going North which I am their was traffic backed up for miles when I came. Rain is expected as well and the construction zones plus rain is really a tough combo for me having difficulty seeing when the lanes are very narrow. The heat will be unbearable so I would appreciate prayers of safety for Cammie and I for complete protection with no car trouble or accidents.

I will write more when I have a chance.

Love,

Nancy

Faith, I pray you get some answers with your tests next week - GOOD answers - and that you feel better soon.

Chris, thank you for the encouraging words. I would say the same of you too.

Jean, thank you for the prayers.

Nancy I am glad you made it safely to your mom's and got to see her. My mom went the same route pretty much as yours. She refused to eat too and "lived" on Ensure. We would bring her rootbeer floats from the DQ and she did enjoy those (at least it was getting something down her!). Her dementia got so bad that she just stared into space at times and it was like we weren't there. I chattered on with all of the family news anyway. When our daughter came with us with her toddler it did help Mom light up a little. Little Annika would toddle around the room with Mom's walker and that amused Mom. Still Mom dwindled physically and mentally until finally they called my sister and I in and we were with her at her last breath. My mother had put the things of God behind her in the latter years, sadly. However she did allow me talk of salvation to her at the end (though she stared away from me with a frown). The aid who was with her from the time she got to the nursing home requested the honor of bathing her in preparation of their coming to take her body. Mom looked much like a holocaust victim - she was just bones. I will never forget that. The aid was SO kind to her in life and death, though Mom could be cruel to her at times when her mind was going. Hospice was there (God bless them) and we all encircled Mom's bed and the hospice nurse prayed as Mom was passing, as did the staff that took care of Mom. What a bittersweet time. All that is just to say, I have been there and I know how hard it is to face the inevitable...but the Lord is with us. You're in my prayers.

Wednesday morning I began to have pain in my abdomen and though I hoped it would go away - it hasn't. I suspect gallbladder. IF that is the case they will send me to Midland (3+ hours away) and not let James be with me. I DON'T want that! He has an important C&P exam through the computer with the VA and it is crucial for his case. He CAN'T miss it and his claim depends on this outcome. His depression is worse too. Your prayers are appreciated!

Love all of you,

Ade

Dear sisters,

I wanted to tell you I made it safely home. I spent most of yesterday dealing with scanning the VA stuff to my advocate only to find out he is on vacation until July 20 and I am not sure what I am supposed to do but I just know I am supposed to do it within 60 days. Today I woke up really early with a very bad stomach ache and not my usual colon stuff. I took some Pepto Bismol which I don't usually take and went back to bed. I got up and had to run some errands and just drug myself to the grocery store. I still had really bad stomach pain.

After eating I just layed down for most of the evening.

Ade, I just read about your pain. Praying we are both better. I do remember you sharing about your Mom in the past. It is so hard to see your loved ones disappearing before your eyes. I fear for my Mom and what is to come. I do hope that James will be able to have his computer exam with the VA. I went through a bunch of gallbladders tests in the past and they could find nothing but I still had the pain and then it eventually went away. I hope yours goes away on it's own.

Faith, I pray you are feeling better too.

Jean, thank your for your prayers. How are you doing?

Chris, how are you doing? I appreciate your prayers.

Wheatfields, I realize many have gone through dementia with a loved one. You were smart to journal which I have not done.

Sunshine, we appreciate your posts and your prayers.

Cammie can't get into the vet until July 21. My vet (who I really didn't care for at all) retired on Labor Day. We were not notified of this. Another vet has bought the practice and it sounds like she is well liked so we'll see. Cammie and I both have had good and bad days. I am praying her condition is okay to wait this long.

I will write more when I feel better. I do appreciate all of you so much.

Love,

Nancy

HI Teka,

I am not sure since this pain I have been having is different that colon issues. It is better and I am making a concerted effort to eat better. I have actually been cleaning sludge out of my gutters the last couple of days. Oh my what a filthy, icky mess. I could see from my second story bedroom window that the gutter was not draining. I had my roof washed a couple of years ago and the shingles residue apparently collected in the gutter and what a mess. I will have to hire someone to deal with the second story. My Little Giant ladder I bought several years ago is just way too heavy for me to maneuver.

Yes, it was great to see my Mom even though it was heartbreaking at the same time. She can only have one visitor at at time. I saw my sister and her DH after seeing my Mom. They only live ten minutes away from her facility so it does make it a bit easier for her to see her now.

I haven't even studied the VA stuff since my advocate is on vacation. I will soon though.

I hope you are doing well. So glad to hear that NY is doing SO much better now with the virus. IL opened up a bit more at the end of June and we are seeing our number of infections increase but they are doing way more testing so we'll see. Our school district is giving the parents a choice of total online learning or a hybrid where the kids will attend in school only on certain days. One of my friends is the health tech at my former elementary school. I do NOT envy her position at all. I have no idea how she will stay safe as all the kids that feel sick go to see her usually. Not sure how that will work in the new era we find ourselves.

Good to hear from you.

Ade, how is your stomach pain? I hope you are doing much better.

Love,

Nancy

Thank you Wheatfields. I hope you continue to find encouragement here. Have a great weekend.

Nancy, thank you for all your wonderful words of wisdom and prayers and the always timely banners. I’ve been dealing with much anxiety over the stomach issues I’ve been having. The ultrasound showed nothing unusual in my gallbladder or any other organs near there which is good news but doesn’t solve my problems. The doctor has given me medication for IBSD and also new meds for the anxiety. I think they will both take awhile to have a real effect so I’m asking for prayers that God will heal me and help me to conquer this anxiety. I feel it’s all related to everything we’ve been dealing with for the last six months along with this awful pandemic. There is some good news, my DH is finally feeling mostly better except now he also has sciatica. While painful, not as scary as the other stuff. My sciatica is slowly getting better also, but I’ve been canceling some of my appointments because of anxiety and that’s not good. I really have to trust that Jesus will help and heal me.

I’m glad you were able to at least have a short visit with your mom and get back home safely. I can understand your feelings of losing your mom as I went through something similar with my mom. The grieving process is a long one even before she passes into Our Lords arms and perfect peace. You are always in my prayers.

Everyone here is always in my thoughts and prayers too. We are dealing with so much in our personal lives and the added stress of this pandemic and these turbulent times of protests in the streets is just too much. I pray that God has a plan for all this turmoil and we will have a better world going forward.

Love and prayers,

Faith (in the future)

Faith, Jean, Chris, Nancy, Carol - thank you for your prayers! I am still having a lot of discomfort but not as bad as before. Our doctor friend said it was Diverticulitis (I have a diagnosis of Diverticulosis but never had a flare up before) and that I should be seen right away. I called my doctor and they couldn't get me in for a week (for a VIRTUAL appointment) so I said OK. Then the next day the doctor called and we had a phone visit (who knows what they charge for just that). She thought it was an obstruction and suggested Miralax twice a day and to call if it gets worse or I get a fever. I have been taking some stuff we bought James so he wouldn't strain after his bypass surgery and things are moving ok but I still have distention of the abdomen and tender places - so who knows. If it gets worse I'll call again. I also take probiotics and it helped tremendously for the spastic colon.

Nancy and Faith, are your GI issues any better? How is Cammie?

Nancy thanks for the Word you have shared. What a blessing and balm for the soul it is!

James finally had his P&T exam for the VA last Wednesday - the final thing (we hope) in the claim process. The doctor was very nice so we pray he gets the highest recommendation. The Lord knows he has suffered enough. Anyway now we wait - again. It is in God's hands. "We know not what the future holds, but we know Who holds our future"!

I don't know what one is worse - the virus - or the violence. But we have a powerful Heavenly Father who is able to keep us all til that Day. May His peace and healing be with you all. No matter what, we are headed for Glory in the end of it all!

Blessings,

Ade

Nancy, the VA gets SO ridiculous that sometimes to keep from popping a gasket over them we just have to step back, roll our eyes to heaven and laugh! Honestly, could they make it any harder? The Lord just has to answer our prayers for patient endurance for these trials (like we don't have enough already). And then when I am most frustrated over this STUFF - He says to take a good hard look at PAUL'S life - and I humbly repent of my lack of patience and my frustration, since in comparison...it truly IS just STUFF (but still important to us). This is just a test and the Lord is watching. Lord forgive me and help me to walk in the Spirit and not the flesh. (He never said this life would be easy - but a break surely would be nice!) )

James has an appointment for labs and doctor in Fort Stockton over an hour away at the VA in September, then two more appointments in Midland, 3+ hours away the next day. We had hoped to stay the night up there (our son offered to pay for the hotel!) and then head up to Big Spring, which is 5+ hours away from home for James' eye appointment. I was told today that they are booked up until OCTOBER. So we have to wait months for an eye appointment that is over 5 hours away from home! That's the Texas VA. Otherwise it is out of pocket and that's not going to happen right now. I had an eye exam in Midland well over a year ago and it was $100. Then I took the script to Walmart, bought the cheapest frames at $9 - and still the total was $500! The beauty of moving to Ohio is that EVERYTHING is within an hour of home. BUT there is far more violence and virus there, so... we stay put for now I guess unless the Lord clearly says to go.

I did have my appendix out with my hysterectomy. I think if it was really a blockage I would be in big trouble by now. I have very tender places and distention but not the pain I had a week ago thankfully. I think it will blow over in time. We are in a remote part of TX (why everything is SO far away!) and there haven't been many local virus cases so far - but up where our appointments are is another story. We just pray and try to be smart about it.

Poor Cammie! I can just imagine she freaks out at the vet (our kitties did) and you hate to put her through that, but you have to find out what is wrong. I pray for calm for her, a non-serious diagnosis and easy quick cure. Let us know how it goes please.

James shot this sunrise and this is the WEST sky! Crazy Texas!

Praying for you all,

Ade

Chris, bless your heart. You DO live in a wonderful place in our country for sure. We have been there a couple of times and loved it. I am blessed to look at these mountains, which I never get tired of - but YOU have the OCEAN! (I am fighting back some envy here.) ) Anyway thank you again for your kind words. May the Lord grant you peace in this crazy storm.

I want to add a P.S. to my post above. PLEASE, I do not in ANY way wish to minimize ANYONE'S troubles by calling it stuff. I only conveyed that the Lord was telling ME not to be a grumbler - which is so easy for me to do. We all need to share our burdens here, and help to carry one another's trials to the Lord in prayer. It's why we as the body of Christ love each other. We understand one another like no one else can. You are ALL under SUCH heavy burdens and you are such strong warriors in the Lord standing firm in Him, praying for one another, though sometimes we are hanging on for dear life ourselves. Please don't think I was talking about you in my post - just me. When the Lord rebukes me - I always deserve it. Then upon my repenting and confession I am humbled and loved in His mercy. Just wanted to make that clear. I love and greatly respect ALL of you.

Ade