Calm before the storm?

Seilien · June 2020

I would say we have all felt the devastating, dark feelings from diagnosis and treatment.

Does anyone feel calm? I am wondering if I have reached acceptance of my fate or if I'm truly just feeling "ok" with my situation. Maybe I feel this way because I'm ignoring it and I am not actively doing treatment right now. Maybe I have embraced living a day at a time but I am very shocked at how calm I'm feeling. I'm not depressed, I'm not obsessing, I'm not quite myself and I worry that I am just waiting until something bad happens.

Does anyone feel like this? Cautiously calm and optimistic? I dont understand it in myself.

AliceBastable · June 2020

If you'd fill out your information on diagnosis, surgery, and treatment, people could give relevant answers.

buttonsmachine · June 2020

Seilien, I have felt that way too at times. I think sometimes it is a coping mechanism that kicks in, or something that we do subconsciously to protect ourselves from the reality of what is going on. I also think, though, that sometimes genuine acceptance and calm do grow. I find it's kind of a paradoxical whirlwind - maybe because it's just too big to process, and I'm all over the map. Sometimes I'm crushed by what has happened, and other times I feel strangely okay with things.

illimae · June 2020

Seilien, yes, I’m calm too. After the 1st couple months of crazy and once I educated myself on what was both statistically likely and what was possible, I fell back into a very normal day to day. Every once in awhile something triggers a funk but it never lasts. I think I always knew I’d never grow old but all sadness is really for my husband who I suspect will either become destructive or an angry recluse after I’m gone.

Calm before the storm?

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