Worried Mom & Grandmom

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Ashs4u
Ashs4u Member Posts: 12
edited March 2020 in Waiting for Test Results

I was just told I have breast cancer,going for a Biopsy March 17th. I am worried and wondering if I should discuss with family now or wait? Any help you can offer I will appreciate!


Thanks,

Ash

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  • Ingerp
    Ingerp Member Posts: 2,624
    edited March 2020

    Everyone has their own thoughts about this. I always kept it very close hold until I had full information. I also really down-played it to my kids.

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  • Ashs4u
    Ashs4u Member Posts: 12
    edited March 2020

    Thank you !! You live close to my family in Richmond, Va. ,we have plans to move back to Lake Anna this year, as of now we live in Washington ,Pa ( Scenery Hill area of Pa. ) I am so nervous and worried to death! My kids are grown ,have their families ,its my 16 yr. old Grand daughter who will be devastated! She and I have a very ,very close bond! Its sad because my youngest son was diagnosed with MS and given 6 yrs before he is in a wheelchair, I was hoping to be closer to help with his and his wife's newborn, now I will just have to be positive and do my best! Any advice would be greatly appreciated !

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  • edj3
    edj3 Member Posts: 2,076
    edited March 2020

    You were diagnosed before your biopsy? That seems a little backwards to me, seems that most if not all of us have a biopsy and then get the dx.

    Regardless, you're in the hardest stage in my opinion--no idea on treatment, full diagnosis, everything is up in the air. So post here, read the articles here if you're so inclined but otherwise don't google. There's a lot of really wrong information floating out there. So point in getting yourself freaked out until you know more.

    Best of luck, none of us wanted to be here alas but now that we are, this is a very supportive group.

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  • Ashs4u
    Ashs4u Member Posts: 12
    edited March 2020

    Thank you edj3, yep that's what the oncologist told me after my mamo and ultrasound ? She believed it is cancer in my left breast! I go for a biopsy march 17th. I'm scared and worried but trying to remain positive ! Thank you again for any advice!

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  • Yogatyme
    Yogatyme Member Posts: 2,349
    edited March 2020

    Ashs4u, as the others have said, you are in the most anxiety provoking time and it will seem like time drags between now and the 17th. Just because the oncologist said she “thinks” it’s bc, you cannot know definitely until results of the biopsy. I had the exact opposite experience....no one, including breast specialist, radiologist or pathologist thought I had bc. But biopsy proved them wrong. So, I’m hoping you have the luck of the Irish on the 17th and find that your oncologist is alsowrong. Sending hopeful thoughts your way! Let us know what you find out.

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  • Ashs4u
    Ashs4u Member Posts: 12
    edited March 2020

    Thank you so very much yogatyme!! I am hoping she is/was wrong also...………..when I have any results, I will post back ! God Bless and have a great evening!

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  • Moderators
    Moderators Member Posts: 25,912
    edited March 2020

    Hi Ash and welcome to Breastcancer.org,

    We're sorry you find yourself here and worrying, but we're really glad you've found us. As you can already see, our Community is an incredible source of information, advice, and support -- we're all here for you while you figure out what's going on.

    As others here have said, a diagnosis can't be reached until after biopsy, so hang in there until you get those results. We'll all be hoping the best for you! And, if it turns out you indeed have breast cancer, we'll be right here. In the meantime, try to remain calm and positive and keeping yourself busy.

    Let us know once you have your results!

    --The Mods

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  • AliceBastable
    AliceBastable Member Posts: 3,461
    edited March 2020

    It sounds like you haven't actually been diagnosed yet. And you already have an oncologist without a firm diagnosis? And that's who is guessing? It all sounds backwards and very confusing.

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  • MinusTwo
    MinusTwo Member Posts: 16,634
    edited March 2020

    I wouldn't tell anyone until: a) you have a firm diagnosis, and b) you have a treatment plan set up. Everyone is different, but for me, I didn't want everyone worrying every day - whether talking to me or not.

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  • Ashs4u
    Ashs4u Member Posts: 12
    edited March 2020

    Thank you so much MODS !! I am going to wait until the biopsy to discuss any further! but it sure is nice to know ,I am NOT alone!

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  • Ashs4u
    Ashs4u Member Posts: 12
    edited March 2020

    Yes!! That is what has happened! So now I am going to wait for the biopsy report! I appreciate your words and time ! Thank you!

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  • Nana2-8
    Nana2-8 Member Posts: 66
    edited March 2020

    Ashs4u - between now and St. Pat's day is the worst time for you! So many things are up in the air and you are probably not able to think of much else. I like your idea of holding off saying anything until you get firm explanation. However, I can tell you that 5 years ago, when I was diagnosed my oldest granddaughter was 14 and was/is my pride and joy. Such a special bond. She took it upon herself to send me a text every morning on her way to school (we live 7 hours apart). She has a keen sense of awareness, and knew just the right time to ask if I "craved" anything. Knowing what she might be up to, I hesitated in my response ~ (it was a school night and she loves to bake). On that Friday, I told her I finally crave.....oatmeal cookies. Sure enough! She shipped me her homemade cookies! Best medicine ever! ~ Don't underestimate how much people of all ages can raise your spirits. ~ In the meantime, deep breaths until 3/17.

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  • Ashs4u
    Ashs4u Member Posts: 12
    edited March 2020

    Wow Nana, your life resembles mine a lot !! I too have a 16 yr old grand daughter whom is my WHOLE WORLD ! she lives 7-8 hours away ,we speak EVERYDAY! I raised her until she was 5, then he Daddy took over and has done a wonderful job with her! I do understand what your saying ,and I am remaining positive and waiting...………..Thank you so much for your words!

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  • Yogatyme
    Yogatyme Member Posts: 2,349
    edited March 2020

    Nana & Ash, I have a niece who was like this with my mother. It was the sweetest relationship to observe. You are both so fortunate and fostering those relationships will be sweet for those granddaughters for the rest of their lives.....and yours!! These posts warmed my heart today.

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  • Ashs4u
    Ashs4u Member Posts: 12
    edited March 2020

    Yogatyme,

    Thank you for your sweet words!! It is amazing the bond form between Grannys and Grand daughters! I'm more like her Mother as she didn't have one , so mine is very special to my heart!

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