seeing cancer deaths everywhere...

Hi,

I'm in the midst of treatment for a recurrence, so my mindset is not great right now, but I seem to see or hear about deaths from cancer everywhere these days. The latest two in the news are Neal Peart of Rush (brain cancer) and Elizabeth Wurtzel (breast cancer), who wrote Prozac Nation. I keep reading and hearing that cancer, esp breast cancer, is becoming a chronic condition, that it's manageable and there's always a new drug around the corner. I want to believe that, for the sake of my young daughter, but I'm having a hard time feeling hopeful....anyone else feeling the same way?

Comments

  • illimae
    illimae Member Posts: 5,710
    edited January 2020

    As a metster, I can say that I lose someone I know online or in person too often to count and I agree, cancer deaths are everywhere. As far as BC being considered chronic depends on your age more than anything, in my opinion. A long lasting but tolerable condition may not adversely impact the normal lifespan of someone in their 60's or 70's as significantly as someone in their 30's or 40's. For those of us with metastatic bc a 22% chance of being alive after 5 years us absolutely BS. For anyone diagnosed young and early stage who still face an approximately 30% chance of recurrence and lots of time left to deal with the worry and physical aftermath of treatment would likely agree, this is nothing like having diabetes.

    Sorry, this wasn't a very uplifting comment but who knows what breakthroughs are waiting to be discovered. I remain hopeful that there is more in the works for me to try when the time comes.

  • Jinx27
    Jinx27 Member Posts: 238
    edited February 2020

    Just came in to say I share the same sentiments, the cancer deaths are becoming too frequent, they freak me out esp as a young bc patient.

  • Yogatyme
    Yogatyme Member Posts: 2,349
    edited February 2020

    In the last 18 mo my family has lost 3 members to cancer and I helped w a benefit for a young woman w stage IV lung cancer w brain & bone Mets. Her prognosis is not good but we remain hopeful. I agree, it seems like we are being bombarded w cancer deaths. I do have some hope about cancers that are being treated w immunotherapy. I know several people who are having very good responses, so I try to remember that.

  • buttonsmachine
    buttonsmachine Member Posts: 930
    edited February 2020

    I have my share of days where I feel a lot of doom and gloom. It helps me to remember that I am still here, so I should try to live whatever life is still left to me, whether it's a few years or a few decades. I don't know if that helps, but you are not alone in feeling that way.

  • HelloItsMe789
    HelloItsMe789 Member Posts: 47
    edited February 2020

    I'm only the third person in my family to get cancer, and the youngest at 54. (grandmother- colon, and great aunt - breast) I have ILC and haven't even made it through the MRI yet to see the extent of it. It was picked up after a dx of PLCIS just a few weeks ago, so I'm barely wrapping my head around it.

    I'm terrified of dying and I think it's too easy for me to remember the people who have died vs the people who have survived.

    I had a friend who died 7 years after dx - it came back. She was not supposed to be high risk and was not supposed to have one that came back, and was checked out every 6 months. I am afraid to ask what her type was exactly because I don't want to know if it's ILC.

    I had another friend die from pancreatic cancer recently, very suddenly. I know of another guy who passed from a cancer he thought he had beat last year.

    Yet I have a survivor who is helping me in my journey. Mastectomies, reconstruction, she is so full energy and positive! I know a couple others who have gone through this though I'm not as close to them.

    I am trying to remember the ones that have done well, and I need to keep this in the front of my head as I move forward. But I agree it's very hard. My entire life changed in an instant during a phone call Monday night. It will never go back to what it was pre-biopsy, and I don't know what my new normal is. I started therapy a month ago to talk about my friends unexpected death and she is trying to give me exercises to stay in the present and to make that present good (they somewhat work)

  • nonomimi5
    nonomimi5 Member Posts: 434
    edited February 2020

    Yes. I feel the same way. Sending prayers your way. I just read an article about 20 celebrities with BC on everydayhealth.com yesterday and came back to this site to motivate myself to eat healthier and excercise more. So many inspirational women on this site. Good luck to you

  • WC3
    WC3 Member Posts: 1,540
    edited February 2020

    Yogatyme:

    My home town is located in a cancer cluster. My mom cannot say "my daughter had breast cancer" without at least one woman nearby saying "me too!" and these are not all older women. One was in her 20s. Though I still think mine was a matter of genetics.

  • AliceBastable
    AliceBastable Member Posts: 3,461
    edited February 2020

    I think we're just more aware of any kind of cancer we hear about. What we would have heard previously and had a brief reaction to, now goes deeper into our emotions and stays with us.

  • Alicethecat2
    Alicethecat2 Member Posts: 105
    edited February 2020

    Hello Brooklyn

    You'll see from my stats that I had the same type of cancer as you eight years ago.

    Alive and kicking.

    Good luck!

    Alice



  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited February 2020

    I had to be careful who I told about the dx. They would said, oh, my mother had b.c., and I'd say how is she doing (hoping for good news)? And they seemed to say more often than not, "oh, sadly, she died from it". Thanks a lot (wry grin).

    We hear about EVERYTHING these days, instantaneously. I have to be very careful what kind of news I choose to hear. It keeps my mind in the present, avoids triggering of GAD, and keeps me more focused on my belief that I don't know what kind of physical shape others who die from cancer are in, or what kind of environment they lived in (it matters), what they were doing before and after their dx, what treatments they had, etc.

    Claire in AZ

  • HelloItsMe789
    HelloItsMe789 Member Posts: 47
    edited February 2020

    There are a couple of people I wanted to ask what they had, but one has passed and one I'm not sure of their status, so I'm kind of afraid to find out if someone I knew died of ILC, or if it was something else.

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