My Husband, My Life, My Love, My Family, My Cancer

Busy thread this is!

Philly and Candy hope you are hanging in there?

Lots of us are retiring or already retired... me too. I‘ve just officially applied for an enhanced pension, but apparently the pension agency is very ‘picky’. Got as many ducks in a row as possible.

Love the trees... not even near getting ours sorted yet.

Completely get the issue with quality of lighting ...I absolutely hate cold blue top lighting. Much more a fan of warm highlights.

Pocket duty I am def up for as worked for me this month! Thank you all

Candy, I am so sorry to hear about the lady you met in October. 40 is so young. This disease is a beast. When someone dies, it reminds me that I am not in the clear. Things could change at the drop of a hat for me, so I had better enjoy my relative good health now as it can disappear anytime.

Mel, hello yourself.

BooBoo. sorry to hear about your onc who doesn't seem able to read the signals you're sending. It must be exhausting.

As I get older light has become more important, because my eyesight has taken a serious hit. I sometimes wonder if it's not the tamoxifen, but I have cheater glasses in every room of the house. Daughter tries to show me something on her phone and holds it up by my nose. As if I can see anything that close. No, out here, as far away as my arm can hold it, while I squint and give it side eye.

I resent that I make an effort in front of the bathroom mirror to look presentable - you can put a silk dress on a sow and it's still a sow - but at least I try. Then we arrive at our destination and I flip down the visor mirror to make sure I don't have food in my teeth or something suspicious flapping from my nose and that's when I spy it. In the slanting sunlight beaming in the window of the truck - a chin hair so big that Tarzan could swing through the jungle on it. Good god in heaven! I can't go into the gathering with this THING sticking out of my face, this tether, this cable! But do I ever have a tweezer in my purse? Hell no! That would be sensible. So I shuffle around looking for a lighter, convinced that I can burn it off if I just quickly stick my chin in the flame. By this time Hub thinks I'm trying to light his truck on fire and takes evasive action. Bats the lighter out of my hand. I shriek at him, "Why didn't you tell me I have this thing on my face! How can you let me leave the house knowing this is how I look ?!" He says, "What are you freaking out over, you should be used to your nose by now, so it's big. Get over it. " My horror escalates to a whole new level. "My nose?! Do you think I have a big nose? How long have you been thinking this? Oh my god, I can't go in there with a big nose AND a massive chin hair!" Hub quickly tries to make it all better. "No one will notice your nose or your chin hair considering the shirt you're wearing. "

This is why Hub goes to a lot of social events by himself. Light matters.

Runor,

You could have a career as a comedy writer. Once again, you had me roaring. Thanks so much for that bit of levity in my day!!!

Sondra~I am desperately always trying to help my DH. I always feel less than. When this plate of beautiful food plops down in front of my face. I'm starving and he knows it. He is thoughtful and kind to me in ways only a compassionate person could be. He amazes me all he does inbetween working and everything he does.
this week will have been the 12th he was hit in his vehicle driving down the highway to work. I am thankful this year for my family and being here with them another year. Sometimes I wonder why they want me around. I basically just sit there. I'm trying to get more productive by meeting mister adderall and he has helped me. I just want my old Micmel self back. Anyone anyone? Buhler Buhler?

Runor, I definitely agree, you are certainly funny.

I am happy to report that I got rid of the blue light in the house. Waiting for new LED bulbs that should be yellow but did buy 2 pin adapters so I could put my halogen bulbs back in while waiting for the new LED to come. The yellow light is much better for me. Love it. Keeping the blue bulbs in case I ever move but I will never use their blue looking flourescents again. Felt like my kitchen looked like a prison.

Booboo, glad you are switching out your MO. Hoping the best with the new one.

Runor, I would have chin hair but I shave my face and chin every day. You can't see the facial hair as it is blonde BUT I cannot stand it. The final straw was when one of my nephews was younger and pulled the facial fuzz along my jawline. I just use a regular razor since I do it every day. I cannot stand tweezers as they are too painful.

Moomala, I am so sorry you are in the hospital. May you not get a fever so you can go home with whatever medication needed to boot this bastard out of you. Hugs my friend.

Moomala, sorry to hear you’re in the hospital. But I hope the tests give needed info for your treatment, and I’m glad you’re getting close attention. I know the atmosphere is lousy though.

Moomala, sorry to hear you landed in the hospital. Praying the drugs work quickly so you can go home.

Plopping down on Mel's sofa to visit a while.

Mel- Your story of meeting the MBC lady and "We held hands and stared at each other. No words needed." Beautiful. And YES so true.

Mara- " When someone dies, it reminds me I am not in the clear" YES. I am stable now and I relish in that, but.....

Tanya- I am ok. Just weird that I met that lady in Oct and in Dec she is dead. She was in pretty rough shape in Oct, but.... wow. May she Rest in Peace.

Boo- You have a plan, girl. See what the new MO thinks. I will be praying for you.

Moomala- So sorry you got pneumonia and landed in the hospital. Prayers to you. I made a note that you were to see neuro doc this last week. Did that happen and I missed the post??

I try to make notes of everyones upcoming scans and doc visits and try to follow up for the results. But sometimes I miss some. I have been on the phone ALL DAY today concerning changing insurance carriers in Jan and checking with docs and pharmacies to make sure they have the new info and verify coverage. Good grief. Makes you want to pull out your hair.

Hello everyone. I have been a silent reader since inception of this thread. It’s such a warm and loving place that Micmel has created. Thank you, Micmel.

I was recently dx Stage 4. Sure didn’t take long to get back into the world of phone calls, schedules, tests, meds, etc. I had forgotten how involved the patient is with all the set up. I think I have spent half of today on the phone verifying if a doctor is in my plan, or setting up 100 (slight exaggeration) tests and appointments.

Had an MRI this week which resulted in my new diagnosis. Mets to the thoracic spine. Next week is a PET scan to see where else mets are. Later this month, a brain MRI. Freaking me out. I am glad my MO is being thorough but didn’t expect brain MRI without symptoms. See RO later this month. Hoping rads will quiet my back pain. It’s been difficult to sleep at night due to pain and hard to sit at my desk for work

Learned this week how hard it is to tell your loved ones that you are terminal. DH is taking it really hard. I find myself comforting him. He has been by my side for 43 years and will be at my side through what’s ahead. There have been lots of tears.

Looking forward to sitting in Micmel’s living room with all of you!!!

Welcome dodgersgirl we pray for treatable results for you and your DH. There's no easy way to hurt our loved ones with the MBC news. Sorry you're on this thread

Tanya

Damn dodgersgirl, welcome but I wish you weren’t joining us “officially”. So many tests, tears and fears but I hope you know by lurking that you can still live well with stage IV. And I realize nothing we say can make it better but we are here always.

FYI, the brain MRI is easy, it sounds like a mix of sci-fi move and a construction site.

Runor, loved the telling of the rogue chin hair. So funny. When all my hair was gone during A/C chemo, it was my chin hairs that returned first. So not fair. They are like the weeds in our gardens, growing when plants won’t. Still to this day, my eyebrow and eye lashes are not as they used to be.... but dumb chin hairs always grow back