Scared single Mom

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Mamamac902
Mamamac902 Member Posts: 3
edited November 2019 in Not Diagnosed But Worried

Hi everyone,


I'm new here, I took a gander around and as much as I wouldn't wish this on anyone... there is comfort in knowing you're not alone. I'm a 35 year old single Mom of four, 13,6,8 and 9. All I keep thinking is.... I can't be sick... I can't die... they need me.

Last Wednesday I found a lump in my left breast (though I think I may have felt it months ago but brushed it off). My family doctor got me in to see her the next day. In that time I turned to google.. uh. I read about some women having discharge from their nipples, so naturally.. I checked. YEP. Dark green discharge in both! My family doctor did a breast exam and confirmed the lump and said she didn't like the combination of the lump and discharge. She put a rush on a mammogram and referred me to a surgeon. My mammogram is on Thursday (Nov21) and my appointment with the surgeon is the following Tuesday.

Words can not express how terrified I am. I have been living in a constant state of panic... Wet palms, sick stomach, fuzzy brain, rapid heart a lot of the time. It's awful! My aunt had breast cancer, so that connection is certainly making things a little scarier. Her cancer spread and to my knowledge will not go away but is being managed. She's been really great since I found the lump, very supportive!

I can't seem to turn my brain off... I find myself trying to hold back tears when I look at my children and think of possibly leaving them. Being a single parent their entire lives has bonded us very closely (even when we were together their Dad lived away because of work and only visited for a weekend every month or two). I am their world.. and they're mine.

Everyone is telling me to relax and keep busy... much easier said then done!


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  • San1975
    San1975 Member Posts: 36
    edited November 2019

    Mamamac902

    You came to the right place to get information and support. What your feeling is absolutely normal and you are right, its not easy to relax. But my good friend had what you described, very similar, and hers turned out to be a benign cyst. Try not to stress thinking the worst, i'm sure its hard considering your a single mother, but a lot of symptoms turn out to be benign changes. Your doing the right thing taking charge of your health and getting it checked out. One day at a time during the waiting and testing phase. Keep your head up and sending {{hugs}} your way!

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  • Moderators
    Moderators Member Posts: 25,912
    edited November 2019

    Dear Mamamac902,

    Welcome to the BCO community. We are so sorry that you are experiencing these breast changes and the worry that they bring but we are glad that you reached out to our members. The time spent waiting for tests and an answer to what is going on can be the most stressful part of following up with new health concerns. You will and have already found great support from our members. We hope that you will stay active here and continue to reach out as you need over the next week. Keep us posted as to what you learn. Let us know if there is anything we can do to help you to navigate around the boards and get connected here.

    The Mods

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  • Mandyhiero
    Mandyhiero Member Posts: 90
    edited November 2019

    I can’t offer any advice but I’ve been where you are and know that feeling of looking at your kids and feeling like you’re gonna break down. I’m praying for you.

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  • MamaAvery
    MamaAvery Member Posts: 47
    edited November 2019

    I’m so glad you found this forum. Everyone here is wonderful. They may not always say what people WANT to hear, but they will be honest and helpful. I hope all goes well for you and you have benign results.

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  • djmammo
    djmammo Member Posts: 2,939
    edited November 2019

    Mamamac902

    Bilateral green discharge is not a sign of breast cancer.

    see this link: https://community.breastcancer.org/forum/83/topics/857426?page=1#post_5015399

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  • Mamamac902
    Mamamac902 Member Posts: 3
    edited November 2019

    Thanks so much for the replies everyone!

    My mammogram was today, it went pretty well... except the last image, which hurt A LOT. Before it was over the tech told me that they'd likely be wanting an ultrasound. She was right, they called me 30mins later and wanted me to go back. Ultrasound didn't take long and was mildly uncomfortable.

    A few hours later I got a call from my family Doctor to say they received the results already. They booked a core biopsy for next Thursday. This is really freaking me out... I already had an appointment for the surgeon to view my results on Tuesday and decide how to proceed.... but they've bypassed this and are sending me right to core biopsy.

    So scared....


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  • Moderators
    Moderators Member Posts: 25,912
    edited November 2019

    Hang in there, Mamamac -- we know this can all be scary and overwhelming, but keep in mind that most biopsies turn out benign (in the US, about 80% of women who have biopsies get benign results). So try to keep a level head while you wait for your biopsy and keep us posted on what you find out!

    We're sending good vibes your way!

    --The Mods

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  • AliceBastable
    AliceBastable Member Posts: 3,461
    edited November 2019

    I can't imagine a surgeon seeing you before a biopsy. They wouldn't have anywhere near enough information without it.

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  • Mamamac902
    Mamamac902 Member Posts: 3
    edited November 2019

    Hey everyone,

    Just wanted to give you an update. I had my appt. with the surgeon on Tuesday. She read the report from the radiologist and confirmed that they are concerned. She did an exam and said it feels smooth, that she believes I'd be a perfect candidate for a lumpectomy. She informed me of what would happen next, if it was benign or malignant. Scary stuff..


    My biopsy was yesterday... that was tough.. I bled quite a bit. Pain today isn't bad, just sensitive. When I got there they were going to do a mammogram guided biopsy! When I expressed my shock the tech asked the radiologist if he was able to do ultrasound guided, he approved. Does anyone know why he would have chosen mammogram over ultrasound? The tech suggested maybe it was due to the position of the lump? (its right next to the nipple).. Also, while the tech was gone to speak with the radiologist, I got to see my mammo image.... The lump looked much larger then I thought it was.

    During the procedure the radiologist said they may want to give me medicine to shrink it before they do surgery... His assumption of surgery was a little scary... but not as scary as when I got home and found out they only shrink malignant tumors :( My mind started spinning and I immediately started shaking. Uhg. Stupid nerves. This whole process the way people have been dealing with me, I feel like they know what they're looking at and just can't say. So when he said that, I feel like he slipped up and spoke his mind. I figure... this is his job.. and I'm sure he's seen this enough to know what he's looking at.

    So... now we wait. The surgeon said she's going to be looking out for the results and will be on top of it. She expects about a week before they come in.


    Please send prayers... I need all the good vibes I can get.

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  • thisiknow
    thisiknow Member Posts: 134
    edited November 2019

    Mammamac... will hope for good results and pray for you. Please try to not let fear make you suffer so. It's just too much. Just know you can come straight here to find just the info and support you need! God bless and big ((hugs)).

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