Insomnia At Night, Anxiety In The Day

Elderberry, changedname gives great advice, all of which i agree with. Take one thing at a time, which is your condition, and let your hubby take care of himself for now. Please contact your primary doctor or whoever is prescribing your Ativan, ect., and let them know of your anxiety and insomnia. Be very open and honest about it. You may even benefit from seeing a psychiatrist, since they specialize in these type meds and can help you better to find the right ones to fit your situation. Maybe your primary could refer you to one.

Also, try distraction. Treat yourself to a really good movie, or allow yourself to binge watch a terrific show on Netflix, go shopping for some retail therapy, browse the stores, buy a new pair of shoes or a pretty blanket or something to lift your spirits. Go to the grocery store and buy something really delicious to eat that you normally wouldn't spend the money on.

Get out in nature, too. Take a walk around the block or a drive to a beautiful scenic park or lake with your hubby. Or take a drive by yourself, cranking up the radio when your favorite songs come on and sing along at the top of your lungs. Or just listen to music at home and dance around and sing,

I do have to say,tho, it sounds like the meds need adjusting before you can really move forward with having more normal days and nights. I was like that, I had such high anxiety and the different antidepressants I tried increased my anxiety! They also made me to where I couldn't even get off the sofa. The nurse practitioner said they made me “flat". I finally tuned in to the fact that I had anxiety not depression, explained that to the doctor and was given the medicine Buspar which helped me get back on track.

Also, PLEASE KNOW that metastatic breast cancer is a crap shoot, meaning you did nothing wrong and you are not “at fault" because you received this diagnosis! No one really knows why some women progress to this stage. Practice extreme self care and let yourself off the hook! Don't let anyone, anyone, make you feel like somehow you brought this on yourself. You didn't miss something or make some error. It happened but you are not to blame. Please tell yourself that.

Elderberry,

This is a very hard time. Your feelings are so normal and so understandable.

I see that you were diagnosed with liver mets. Me, too, almost seven years ago. The liver mets scared me, and I thought my prognosis was short because of them. I've had a lot of different treatments, and several failed, but some have worked well. And I'm still here with a reasonably good quality of life. There is hope!!! Herceptin is a good medicine And there are more, and more on the way.

Congratulations on your long and happy marriage! There is an excellent chance you will have more good years together. We had just celebrated our 45th anniversary the month I was diagnosed. Didn't expect to be here for our 50th, but I was. 52 coming up soon! (And they've been good and happy years.)

Do take care of yourself. You didn't cause this. It feels like life has exploded, but some normalcy will return.

All good wishes!

Elderberry, I'm right there with you. Newly dx last month with bone mets, lung mets and waiting results of abdominal CT I'm having next week. Radiation this week for back pain. I'll see the oncologist for full systemic treatment plan next week. My diagnosis comes 24 years after my original diagnosis. For the first few weeks I wasn't eating or sleeping much at all. Things are a little better now, but oh my goodness, this brain will not stop!

DivineMrsM, thanks for the suggestion that anxiety and depression don't always go hand in hand. I'm going to talk with my doctor about this too. I've had really awful reactions to AD's and gave up. I've been using a little more xanax than I'm comfortable with and although the oncologist said she wasn't worried about the way I'm using it, it bothers me a little and I think something like Buspar might be better for a long-term use.