Feeling Frustrated!

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Mom2Sarah
Mom2Sarah Member Posts: 35
edited January 2019 in Just Diagnosed

I was diagnosed two weeks ago and I have opted for a BMX due to my family history. All of my appointments are this week, and I thought I would have a better picture of what things would look like? Instead, I'm still in a holding pattern. I have to wait until after surgery and the Oncotype DX test results to know if I have chemotherapy or not, and I do know that I will have to have some sort of estrogen blockers for the next 5 years. I have no idea what reconstructive surgery will really look like, and I'm just feeling very lost and frustrated. And not that I think anyone her can fix it, but dang it, I'm a planner and ready to just this done!


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  • PurpleCat
    PurpleCat Member Posts: 358
    edited January 2019
    For me, the waiting that you are currently doing was the worst part of the whole ordeal. I had a moment about three weeks after surgery, when I was dragging around and in pain and getting radiation treatment set up, when I realized that I would rather be dragging around and in pain then back in that early waiting game. Everyone here can relate to what you’re going through. Hang in there! You will get through this and come out the other side, truly!
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  • Mom2Sarah
    Mom2Sarah Member Posts: 35
    edited January 2019

    I know it sounds dumb, but I think shouldn't this woman know if they're going to do chemo or not? Maybe I need to get a second opinion? Maybe she's doing the right thing..... I am really my own worst enemy sometimes.

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  • Spookiesmom
    Spookiesmom Member Posts: 9,568
    edited January 2019

    There are a lot of variables that can’t be known until certain tests and surgery is done. Those will determine they type of cancer it is,there are many. How much, if any chemo is necessary. If radiation is necessary. If AI will be benificial.

    Waiting for this is the worst part. Once you have a plan, it does get better.

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  • Mom2Sarah
    Mom2Sarah Member Posts: 35
    edited January 2019

    Thanks. I guess after talking to the radiation oncologist yesterday, she acted like they already knew everything there was to know. I guess it's just not that cut and dry. Stupid cancer! Lol

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  • Mncteach
    Mncteach Member Posts: 274
    edited January 2019

    I too am a planner and the waiting was the WORST! I had no family history and am under 50 so I also had to wait until genetic testing was done to make my final decision. Most of my doctors had a suspicion I would need chemo (in part because of my age) but they could not make a plan until all my tests were back. I also had a BMX and as far as reconstruction, I will be happy to share with you how mine looked, but remember every person is different and it will also depend on what kind of reconstruction you have. There will be time while you are healing to get the second opinion if you need or want it.


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  • PurpleCat
    PurpleCat Member Posts: 358
    edited January 2019

    Chemo really does depend on the final report from surgery and the oncotype score. They don’t want to overtreat us because chemotherapy comes with its own risks and long-term side effects, and we want to avoid those if we safely can. It’s just too bad that these more targeted treatments come with these agonizing waiting periods for us. Now that I’m through that part, I can say it was worth waiting for the information to avoid chemo, but at the time I almost would’ve taken the chemo just to be done with the waiting! It’s so hard!
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  • Mom2Sarah
    Mom2Sarah Member Posts: 35
    edited January 2019

    Thank you SO much! I guess I'm just anxious to get things rolling AND with my family history? I want this done and gone. My aunt had breast cancer and passed away last August. So I am sure I am wanting to be overly aggressive and kick it for good. Heck, I wanted to do a hysterectomy just because it's estrogen and progesterone driven! Haha! So maybe (just maybe? lol) I'm being a little over the top? Shhh! Don't tell my husband!

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  • Mncteach
    Mncteach Member Posts: 274
    edited January 2019

    I won’t tell your husband if you don tell mine 😂

    If any of my genetic tests had been abnormal I would have opted for a hysterectomy too!

    Hang in there! We can help and you have this!!

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  • Mom2Sarah
    Mom2Sarah Member Posts: 35
    edited January 2019

    Ha! Oh if my genetic testing comes back abnormal? It’s ALL going!

    And thank goodness and thank God for this place telling me I’m not completely crazy. Just kinda.

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  • Mncteach
    Mncteach Member Posts: 274
    edited January 2019

    We are all kinda crazy here! Welcome to the gang

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  • Spookiesmom
    Spookiesmom Member Posts: 9,568
    edited January 2019

    It helps😂😂

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