FMLA--My experiences (long and sad)

Hello,

I know some of you from the triple positive group, and/or the Herceptin side effects, August radiation, or April chemo groups. I wanted to share my personal experience with what FMLA does and does not do. I was shocked, and I'm now actively seeking another job because of what's happened.

Please remember that a) I am not a lawyer, b) I live in a 'right to work' state (we don't have union protections in many cases), and c) your experiences may vary. This is just my story. I hope it may help someone else know what to expect before you start FMLA.

I was approved for "intermittant, simultaneous" FMLA (in other words, not full time, but just during the sick leave hours I took, or when I ran out of sick leave, personal leave hours). My place of employment requires that you take simultaneous leave with FMLA. For example, once FMLA started, if I needed 2 hours for a doctor's appointment, that would be subtracted from my FMLA hours (480--12 weeks x 40 hours). Once all the sick leave and all the personal leave runs out, if there is any FMLA leave left, it is unpaid. Not every workplace has this policy, so be sure to check.

So, I had to keep very careful track of my sick leave and personal leave. Once they hit 0, that meant no paycheck and also having to pick up a share of insurance, though my job was protected. And of course, once FMLA ran out (I never got to the point of unpaid leave), I'd have no income and no insurance. My doctor didn't like it much, but I worked 25 hours a week during chemo (April-first week in July) and 40 hours a week during radiation (mid-August to mid-September). Every drive to the cancer center is 2 hours round trip, btw, so on work days, I would drive over 3 hours a day. My nurse navigator at the cancer center filled out everything for FMLA, which was then approved by my company's HR. Thankfully, I earn 8 hours of sick leave and 14 hours of personal leave a month due to my length of time at the company, so I didn't have to dip into personal leave until late May and parts of June.

But...one of my two supervisors wasn't happy about it. He/she (I'll use 'they' to save typing that every time) often sent work after hours and on weekends. They clearly were annoyed about cutting back my hours, and I was asked when I explained my FMLA terms, right after my cancer diagnosis, "How on earth will you get all your work done?" I usually worked 35 hours a week on chemo. I went to HR and asked, "What do I do? I'm only supposed to work 25 hours a week, and I keep getting more work." I was told, "Ask your doctor for more hours if 25 isn't enough." What?? I thought THEIR job was to communicate to the supervisor that they were not following the FMLA stipulations. I've been with this company for 16 years and received positive reviews every year. I am a good employee who cares about the mission and the job. I was crushed by the lack of support.

A few weeks after chemo, my FMLA was revised back to 40 hours a week max. (I'm salaried). Again and again, I would get assignments at 9 - 10 PM that were urgent and needed by the next day. Even when I explained I was over my 40 hours or asked for a brief extension, I faced hostility and annoyance. (i.e. "Fine, but I need it by noon.") I finally worked up the courage to call a well-respected labor attorney and paid $200 for a consultation. I'd kept copies of emails and copious notes of every incident (about 8). Just this last week, I notified my supervisors that I would be in 2 hours late (well before 8 AM) due to nausea from my Herceptin infusion (I'm struggling with it). Response: "I'm sorry you're not feeling well, but I do need project A by noon." Luckily, I'd gotten most of it done prior to the worst of the side effects setting in--I'd received the assignment around 1 PM the prior day just before I started my Herceptin).

I know another person may have taken it differently, but all of the legal info was almost as hard to hear as the cancer diagnosis. Quite professionally, I was told, "You have no case. You work for state government and cannot file suit. Nor can you claim anything against your boss. Being a mean person isn't legal grounds for hostile work environment nor ADA non-compliance. Also, there was no pervasiveness--8 or so incidents in 6 months is nothing; you'd need like 100. Finally, you would have to prove that the scolding emails related *directly* to the cancer, and although you have said you feared retaliation, that means nothing. I'm sorry. I have a few suggestions going forward (see below)."

So. I messed up because I didn't realize that the burden of saying no, no, no, and no, rested on me. I messed up because I tried to be a good employee while in treatment for cancer. I messed up because I was scared of retaliation, but that's not even a valid thing. Stupid me. Here's some advice from the attorney:

1. Once you reach your maximum hours (25, 40, whatever those may be), put up an "out of the office" automatic reply on emails. Don't reply to emails. (I'd been checking emails mostly because I get over 100 a day and didn't want them piling up too much).

2. Be clear whenever you are about to go over allowed hours. Explain it and ask for an appropriate extension. Copy HR on everything. (Such as if I'm at 39 hours, and an assignment will clearly take more than an hour--ask to complete it by the afternoon of the next business day that will not go over 40 hours).

3. Ask a higher-level supervisor (i.e. your boss's boss) for a change in supervisory structure. But don't make it about cancer. Explain that that it's for the benefit of the company and would make you more productive. You can put in some bits about how your health is not as good as it was before, but don't make that the focus of your request.

4. Don't tell ANYONE you spoke to a lawyer, even your co-supervisor who has been supportive.

5. Put up an out of office automatic email every weekend and holiday and evening after you leave work (unless you absolutely won't check email in the evenings). Oh, and holidays don't count in the 40 hour work week. (I totally didn't understand that).

6. If you can get a letter from your doctor to support your need for a change in supervisory structure, that might help, especially if phrased in such as way that although you have health challenges, you still want to be a productive worker--you just need some help and adjustments.

7. FMLA may *say* you can't get a negative job review based on the time you were on FMLA, but the reality is, when you come off FMLA (around Feb 1, 2019), they can make criticisms of your work and say it occurred Feb - April 2019 (the months not on FMLA for the period under which I would be evaluated). Don't be surprised by it, but you can write remarks on your evaluation that can become a matter of record before you sign.

I'm sure someone here will say, "Get another lawyer!" Folks, I'm not made of money. I have a son in college. You know the drain on funds with copays and such, even with good insurance. And believe me when I say--this lawyer is known statewide and well respected. I don't think another lawyer would tell me differently. It was her job to be honest about the law and tell me what to expect, and she did.

Like I said, I am seeking another job. However, if that doesn't happen, I'm in the position to go back to a lower-paid position (non-administrative--I work in education--so, back to the FT teaching pool, which is fine, except for the drastic pay cut). I may be able to get the supervisory structure change. I may be able to find another position not under this supervisor at the same business. I'm trying to keep my head above water. But I was deeply depressed, even suicidal. I almost checked myself into a hospital, except I was afraid they'd turn me away (we live in an area that is way over carrying capacity for mental health patients), and (don't laugh, it's true), I had midterms with my students and did not want to disappoint them. I care very much about my students, who have all been INCREDIBLY kind and supportive.

That's my story. I'm still very depressed and almost sick about going to my monthly meeting tomorrow with the supervisor. I don't want to even be around this person. But I'll do my best. I hope you all have better luck with HR and FMLA. Lesson learned--the company always comes first.

If anyone has had a similar experience, I'd like to hear how you solved these issues.